Some people are complaining that I am not characterizing PTSD correctly. I would like to point out a few things if I may.
Lal in this story is VERY good at hiding her condition because she's been "trained" to hide when things aren't alright and has a habit of compartmentalizing until things blow up in her face. She is also away from the majority of things that would trigger a major episode. So long as she has something to anchor herself to, she's stable. However if that is removed she will snap and take everything out with her.
I don't mean to make light of a serious condition or to offend those who have PTSD. If it seems I have done so, I apologize.
How did he do this to her? How did her annoying and persistent student worm past her defenses so easily? How could he always tell when she needed an anchor to be there, when her memories decided to remind herself of her failure?
On the outside, Lal was very much her usual self.
Inside, she was tormented by the slow shift of her relationship with the persistent blond.
Every time her memories clawed their way to the surface, when her defenses were weak, she found him there. A solid rock she could cling to in the maelstrom of her flashbacks.
He never said a word. He accepted her false rage at being caught so vulnerable by her student. He never complained about her 'attacks' whenever he annoyed her.
She was falling in love and it terrified her to her core.
So when she got a mysterious invitation that made her very suspicious, she leaped on the chance to try and escape her growing feelings for the blond soldier who wouldn't leave her alone.
In retrospect, trying to run away from her feelings for Colonello probably wasn't a smart move. Just being this close to other Flame users who had a habit of flaring made her repress her flinching. Thankfully the room was dark enough to hide most of her reaction.
This entire thing reeked of a set up, but between an unknown adventure almost certain to bite her in the ass, or her budding feelings for her student, her choice was clear.
Hell, she hadn't acted like a proper Gryffindor (read: 'brave' to the point of being stupid) in over seven years. She was overdue for this sort of nonsense.
It wasn't too bad. The other flames were professionals at least...well, most of them.
Skull was so obviously a civilian that had been tapped, that it wasn't even funny. And the others knew it.
Renato seemed to decided that as the civilian, Skull was now his new source of stress release.
Lal had enough after she heard Skull groan in pain from one of Renato's kicks to his ribs.
If he hadn't broken (or at least sprained) one of his ribs, then she was no judge of abuse.
Snarling, she stalked up like an angry dragon behind Renato as he went to kick Skull again for some minor infraction.
She had to live with over ten years of similar abuse because an old man's delusions. She refused to stand by and watch the same just because this arrogant Sun was a self-entitled asshole.
Hearing the gun click behind his head, Reborn slowly turned to find a very pissed off Lal Mirch ready to shoot him.
"Leave him alone right now, or I'll happily blow your fucking brains out," she snarled.
Renato would swear on his mother's grave that there was an after image of a dragon behind her when she said that.
H backed away from the downed Skull and kept his hands in full view.
Lal helped Skull up and then hunted down the first aid kit. She shot the others a look of absolute disgust because none of them thought to stop Renato from hurting the Cloud.
There was a definite bruise on his side for sure, and she only saw some Tylenol packets in the kit.
Then she felt someone press a jar next to her head. It was Fon, the Storm.
"I carry this for the odd accident when I practice," he said by way of explanation.
If that wasn't Bruise Balm, she'd eat her own gun. She nodded gratefully and promptly spread it on Skull's side with an experienced hand, before bandaging it.
"Keep that on for at least an hour, and be sure to wash it off once the bruise is no longer visible," she told him curtly.
Skull nodded, though he held in his tears of pain rather well.
"Thanks," he said.
"I fucking hate assholes who abuse others for their own amusement. It makes me rather murderous," she said, glaring at Renato with such a dark expression he flinched.
Her job done, she handed the jar back to Fon. It disappeared into his sleeves.
She was rather happy to return back to work, at least until the next "assignment".
Colonello, however, was rather pissed.
And the reason was simple enough. After seeing Renato so casually beat the crap out of Skull simply because he could, it dredged up multiple memories of her own childhood. So much so that Colonello refused to let her sleep alone, since it only brought up flashbacks that would have left her screaming otherwise. Or at least whimpering from repressed memories.
"Seriously Lal, what exactly happened?" he asked in concern.
"It's nothing, idiot student!" she told him, irate. She refused to let those creatures control her life, not after she managed to start rebuilding it.
Colonello wouldn't budge from where he was holding her. He was not happy.
Her normal episodes were bad enough. She was only dangerous if you approached her wrong, as he had discovered.
But whatever happened at that meeting was something else entirely. He had never seen fear on her face during a flashback. Her usual response of "Fight or die" had shifted to "flight or endure".
The fact she actually WHIMPERED during the flashback was what alarmed him the most though.
Lal rarely, if ever, made a sound during one of her episodes. Almost like she had trained herself not to. For her to actually whimper like she was terrified of something?
That pissed him off, and he itched to shoot whoever made her that scared.
Lal couldn't look him in the eye. That was another major warning in his head.
Lal never lied to him and she always faced her demons head on.
But whatever this was, it had scarred her so deeply that she hid in shame.
He had heard rumors, about how she must have had an abusive ex-boyfriend or something and that was why she was such a hard ass. It wasn't that uncommon and she did have lingering scars from a very hard past.
Colonello wanted very much to shoot whoever hurt Lal like this. Sadly he had no targets and a terrified captain in his arms.
So he slowly increased the normal dosage of Flames around her until the room was practically saturated in it.
Thank god for Rain flames. He'd rather see her out cold from an overdose of the blue fire than trembling from demons only see could see.
She didn't know whether to love these escapes from her life, or hate them. One thing was for sure... Renato made very, very certain he never harassed Skull in front of her again. The fact she damn near gelded him for it when he thought she wasn't looking was warning enough.
Strangely this seemed to endear her to the Storm and the Mist. Skull certainly had no complaints and made a point to stick close to Lal whenever Renato was in a mood.
Their missions were interesting enough, though she started to get anxious if they took longer than a week.
She hadn't realized how much she had grown to depend on Colonello to keep her flashbacks away at night. Perhaps her superiors had the right idea, shoving him on her as a minder.
"You alright?" asked Fon with concern. "You're rather pale."
"I'm fine."
She wasn't, but that was her standard response to this sort of inquiry. To hold back the concern so she could get her job done and crash after. It was what she specialized in.
Fon didn't look convinced for a minute, but held his silence. After all, just because they performed these missions didn't mean they knew anything about her.
She was relieved when the assignment was over. She didn't care about the money, she never did. Between her savings and the inheritance she never actually touched, she could have retired right then and there and lived off it.
But she would have been bored out of her skull within a week.
Colonello said nothing, but the fact she didn't argue when he wrapped his arms around her so she could sleep said volumes. She was used to this by now.
But he wasn't going to let this rest. The next time he found out she was leaving for an "assignment" he decided to act.
He made a list of warning signs and his phone number explaining her condition. With any luck it would fall out of her pocket or someone would notice it before something terrible happened.
Skull was the one to notice the odd paper in her back pocket, and filched it. He might not be the strongest or the smartest on the team, but he could at least pick a pocket.
Considering the placement he suspected she had no idea it was even there.
Needless to say he rather cursed his curiosity when he realized what he had in his hands. Suddenly a lot of things made sense and he really wished they didn't line up with what he already knew to watch for.
Skull kept his silence. If the others knew about this they would almost certainly try to get rid of Lal and she was the only one who actively defended him from them.
"What do you have there?" asked Fon.
"Nothing!" he said quickly. However Fon was much faster than he was.
He read the paper and his eyes face went blank.
"I see. This explains far too much."
"I don't want that jerk Renato to kick her out," said Skull, looking like a kicked puppy.
"It's our secret, at least until something happens and we have to call the number," said Fon.
If Lal took note of the way the two were observing her in silence, she said nothing.
For the most part, things remained normal. They were given missions, they went out and performed to the best of their ability, and they got paid.
And then something happened.
"Who is Lilac Athena Potter?" said Fon curious.
"Why are we being paid to locate a woman who disappeared more than eight years ago?" asked Viper crossly.
It was taking everything she had not to scream. Why?! Why was this checkerfaced bastard sending them after her?!
"You know her?" asked Renato.
Before Viper could respond, Lal spoke first.
"Lilac Athena Potter, aka the 'Witch-Who-Survives', aka 'Destroyer of Dark Lords', aka 'Mistress of Death'. Disappeared over eight years ago, went completely off the map and hasn't been heard from since. Only presumed alive because the vaults are still active and no children have been found with her bloodline. Known as a proficient battle mage and has one hell of a temper when provoked."
Everyone stared at her.
She blushed.
"I'm a fan, alright? Anyway if we're going to try and track her down it might be better to see where her old childhood home was," said Lal.
"That's not public record and it would require breaking into their Ministry," said Viper.
"Actually it is. When she was fifteen she was falsely charged with using magic in front of normal people, but she got off because of a technicality. On the trial documents they clearly stated she lived in Little Whinging, Surrey," said Lal.
All true without telling them anything.
Renato smirked.
"Well since you seem to know so much about her, you get to lead the team."
"Not a chance in hell. I am not going back to England," said Lal flatly. Seeing the defiant looks of her team, she glared. "If you must know I barely survived their damn war and it was bad enough I know what the inside of Malfoy Manor looks like."
Viper winced.
"What's so special about 'Malfoy Manor'?" asked Fon.
"Malfoy manor is where the magical terrorists took their important prisoners and tortured them for weeks, if not months. It was an important stronghold and often the lead terrorist would come and 'play' with the prisoners," said Viper in a flat voice.
"How do you know about it?" asked Renato.
"I'm a first gen who was smart enough to keep my head down during the war. I sold information to Potter's side until it was too dangerous to stick around so I left. You have no idea how glad I was that she killed that bastard," said Viper.
"Half-blood," said Lal.
"You're really dead set against going to England," said Renato, eyeing her.
"Not a chance in hell. I left that country and never looked back," said Lal flatly.
Too bad she wasn't given a choice. She was going to kill Renato for drugging her like that.
