Chapter 4 is my all-time favorite chapter out of all the multi-chapter stories I've written. Thank you so very much to all of those who took the time to write a review of chapter 4. I don't own any rights to Hollywood Heights storyline or characters; this is the fantasy world I created. Everything in my fantasy world isn't lollipops and rainbows. Sh*t happens when Keeping Secrets.

Keeping Secrets Chapter 5

I'm Breathless Without You

(lyric from "Falling Into You" by Cody Longo)

I sit there for what seems like a life time trying to pull air into my lungs. It's hard for me to breathe. The ringing in my ears finally stopped. I get up and go to the supply cabinet and grab the mop, broom, bucket and cleaning supplies. I clean up the mess in the kitchen hoping that the movement will help me get more air into my lungs. After I take out the trash and put everything away I head upstairs. I walk to our bedroom door and listen for Loren. The room is quiet so I open the door and quietly walk in. Loren is asleep curled on her side hugging my pillow. My breath catches in my throat. I yearn to lay down with her, pull her into my arms and take a deep breath. Instead I go to the linen closet and pull out a blanket and gently cover her. I quickly gather some clothes and my toiletries and head to the guest bedroom. I turn on the light in the bathroom and take a good look in the mirror. My left eye is swollen it will be black and blue by morning; there's a cut on my left cheek caused by her wedding ring, my nose is on longer bleeding but there's dried blood all over my upper lip; my bottom lip is swollen and there's a cut in the corner of my mouth.

I still can't pull enough air into my lungs. I turn on the water in the shower hoping the steam will help me breathe but the steam is suffocating me; I quickly shower and get out. I put on a sweat suit and running shoes and leave out the room. I check on Loren once more, this time I give into my yearning and softly kiss her on the cheek, "I love you baby, I'm so sorry I hurt you," I whisper in her ear. I walk out our bedroom and head down stairs, "might as well get this over with," I say to myself as I walk out the kitchen door heading to the guest house to confess to mom and pop.

I try to take several deep breaths but I still can't pull in enough air and my chest is starting to hurt. I knock on the door. Pop opens the door, "Eddie what the hell happened to you? Are you okay?" Pop asks pulling me into a hug.

"It's nothing pop, I'm fine." I look around the room, "is mom here, I need to tell you guys something."

"I'm right here Eddie," Mom says coming down the stairs. I turn and face her. Shock and worry cross her face. "Eddie are you okay? What happened?"

"Mom. Pop. Please sit down, I need to tell you guys something," I say gesturing for them to sit on the couch.

Max and Nora exchange looks then sit on the couch. I sit in a chair across from them and once again try to take a deep breath, my chest hurts, and I can't get enough air into my lungs. I drop my head in my hands and gather my thoughts. I try and take another deep breath before I look at them. "Pop. Mom, five years ago, I got a phone call from Chloe," I began. I tell them about my conversation with Chloe. I tell them about my monthly visits to the women's correctional facility. I tell them about the cellphone and the phone calls. I tell them about me paying the rent on her condo for five years. I tell them about the letter I wrote to the parole committee. I take another labored breath and I finally tell them about Loren's reaction to my visit to Chloe's tonight. The room is deathly quiet. The silence is killing me. I can't breathe.

My father is looking at me like I'm a stranger. Nora, my mother, can't look at me. My father drops his head. "Get out," did he say something? I don't move. "Get out," is he saying something? My dad slowly raises his head and looks me in my eye, "GET OUT OF MY DAMN HOUSE EDUARDO DURAN!" he yells at me. Pop never calls me Eduardo unless he's really really mad.

"MAX," Nora, my mother yells at him then looks at me with compassion in her eyes. I don't deserve her compassion. I slowly rise to my feet. I can't breathe.

"STAY OUT OF THIS NORA," pop yells.

"Pop, don't yell at mom, this is my fault. Please don't take this out on her," I say.

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO IN MY OWN HOUSE," he shouts.

"Eddie is your son. Our children need us right now," Nora says.

"He's no son of mine. My son would never knowingly befriend the woman who killed his mother, my wife. My son would never befriend the woman who broke his heart, cheated on him and lied to him. My son would never keep that kind of secret from his wife for five years because; I DIDN'T RAISE MY SON TO BE A DAMN CHEATER!" The vein in pop's forehead is sticking out; I know he's really mad now. "Eddie, I'm trying my best to not walk over there and choke you to death. So that I don't kill you right here, right now, I'm telling you to get out of my house," pop says getting to his feet. Mom gets to her feet as well and is pushing him in his chest. In all my twenty-seven years I have never known my dad to be a violent man but right now I know that if Nora wasn't standing between us, I would be dead. I can't get enough air in my lungs. I'm light headed and my chest hurts. I take one last look at my dad, and then walk to the door. I'm about to pass out from the lack of oxygen in my lungs.

I turn around, and shrug my shoulders, I'm gasping for air. "Do it pop," I say raising an eyebrow. "I don't want to live without Loren in my life. I can't breathe without Loren in my life. So do it pop. Choke me to death because I can't take the pain of losing her," I says still gasping for air. I stumble over to him and fall at his knees, tears falling from my eyes, I look up at him, "please pop, I can't take this pain, please do it," I beg. Mom is sobbing into his chest and he's looking down at me.

What should Max do? ~jm~