a/n: many of you have commented on this story looking familiar. Yes this story was on here before. I took it off and had the whole thing beta'd by my wonderful beta Lady Lynn. She is getting the chapters back to me a few at a time and as she gets them back to me, I repost them. I am not planning on changing any of the story, I simply wanted to take out all of the spelling and grammar mistakes. If it does look familiar, it is. And yes I am the same author who originally wrote it. If anyone has any questions, please feel free to ask. I love answering. Hope you enjoy the rest.
Disclaimer- I do not nor have I ever owned anything to do with the original Harry Potter characters and story line or JKR. I do not work at any publishing company or Warner Brothers. Although I was born in the same city as the Warner Brothers(does that count??)
It had been almost a week since Hermione had come back from the meeting and she still hadn't said anything to Remus though both Lily and Severus kept encouraging her to. Dumbledore had also said it would be a good idea to lighten her burdens by sharing them with those she loved. It all came down to making it real, if she had to deal with it, then it meant it really happened and even though she was getting closer to that point, she wasn't there yet.
The Great Hall was buzzing with news. It seemed that a ball was was just announced for the holidays and everyone was invited. First through fifth years could stay until 11 pm and sixth and seventh years could stay until 2 am. The day of the ball would also be free of classes, so everyone could get ready and there would be an extra Hogsmeade weekend the weekend before the ball.
Hermione and Lily started talking about what dresses they wanted to wear and how they would do their makeup and hair. Remus waited patiently for them to finish, then he tapped Hermione on the shoulder.
"Would you like to go with me?" he asked hesitantly.
"Of course, who else would I go with?" she replied.
"I wasn't sure, you just seemed a little distant lately and I thought that maybe you had found someone else you would rather go with."
"Oh, Remus, I am so sorry, of course there is no one else. You are the only one I would ever want to go with. Again I am sorry. Could we please meet in the Room of Requirement, I really need to talk to you." Hermione had decided that she needed to quit being so selfish and tell Remus what was making her so upset and why she was being distant. He deserved to know, after all this was affecting him too.
The two headed straight for the room and when they entered, there were two comfortable chairs, a roaring fireplace and a table with snacks and tea. They took a few minutes to get comfortable and then Hermione launched into her story. Part way through she could feel her eyes starting to sting and she thought about stopping, but for some reason her mouth just kept talking. She knew she was almost done, but she wasn't aware of much else. It seemed her body had gone numb. She wasn't even sure if Remus was still there, he had been silent the whole time, but for some reason, she couldn't stop telling the story. It was almost that her body was purging what happened by the words she was speaking. She ended and closed her eyes. There was absolute silence in the room and right away she pictured in her mind Remus walking out of the room and out of her life. Who would want a girlfriend that did those sort of things with someone who was supposed to be so evil. Well at least she had this off of her chest and now she could try and deal with the rest. She went to stand, when all of a sudden two warm arms wrapped around her. She sighed in relief.
Remus held onto her and then whispered in her ear, "Don't you ever keep something like this to yourself again. Please come to me and tell me. I want to be there to help you; please let me?"
Hermione could only nod her head as she snuggled into the warm embrace.
She wasn't sure how long they were there for, but she woke up to see Remus making his way over to a small table loaded with food that had not been there before. She got up and stretched and came over and joined him. The meal was good and filling and they were soon back on the chair talking about the upcoming holidays. Remus wanted her to come home with him, but as Hermione pointed out, she hadn't spent much time with her grandfather and probably wouldn't get another opportunity to do so before they graduated. Remus reluctantly agreed with her and they decided she would come for New Years. They went on to talk about graduation and what they would be doing after. Since Hermione wasn't sure if she would even be alive then, she talked about what she would like to be doing, if she were. The whole day was spent getting to know each other even more and by the time dinner rolled around, if there had been any doubts in either of their minds as to how they felt about one another, they were now completely vanished. Hermione couldn't believe that she found the one person she could spend the rest of her life with. She didn't care about what everyone else thought of Remus, he was the only one for her and if she ever made it back to her own time, she would do everything in her power to make sure he knew it.
The holidays came up fast and before they knew it, it was the Hogsmeade weekend. Lily and Hermione decided to go by themselves so they could surprise the guys with their outfits. That morning at breakfast a large raven came swooping into the Great Hall and landed beside Hermione's plate. Looking at the bird curiously, she grabbed the parchment offered on it's leg. The bird looked at her and waited patiently for a reply. She unrolled the parchment and began to read. When she was finished she looked at the bird again and nodded her head. The bird bobbed it's head back to her and then took off. She rerolled the parchment and put it into her pocket. She caught her grandfather's attention and went up to the head table. They whispered back and forth to one another for a few minutes, then Hermione reluctantly showed him the parchment. He looked at it for a few moments and then slowly nodded his head. Hermione exited the Great Hall and hurried to her room to get ready for the day. Meanwhile, back at the Gryffindor table the three boys were watching Hermione's actions carefully. They were concerned for their friend and she had been quite jumpy the last little while.
"Moony, what do you suppose they are talking about up there?"
"Probably about some plans for the holidays. She is going to be spending the holidays with him and coming over to my place for New Years."
Both James and Sirius nudged Remus and asked him slyly, "So Moony, got anything special planned for New Years? You know that you are supposed to kiss the one you love at midnight, but with what you two have done already, a kiss would be quite boring. I think you would need to come up with something more creative."
Sirius was laughing at what James had just said and added, "With the sounds that those two are making each night, I don't think there's anything left for them to try. I would say don't do anything I wouldn't, but I think you have already surpassed me in that department." Sirius ended with a barking laugh and James looked close behind him.
"Oh, by the way, Moony, maybe you could get Sirius to show you his silencing spell. It would be helpful to the rest of us." James said to his red faced friend.
"How... what... we use a silencing spell each time, how?"
By this time James was red faced and clutching his sides and Sirius waved his fork around at Remus.
"Well, my dear Moony, most silencing spells only hold up for so long or up to a certain noise decible and going by what we heard, none of the silencing spells we have learned so far would be able to stand up against you two. That's why I will show you one that I learned from home; before I left of course."
Remus was very embarrassed and he knew Hermione would be too. They were both very private people in public, but when it came to being intimate with each other, they became very vocal. He loved it when she moaned and made all of her noises. She always seemed more turned on when he howled and for some reason it made him feel invisible and powerful when he did it. He looked at his two friends and just nodded his head. He was hoping they wouldn't continue this line of conversation, but he knew better. They would wait until he was least suspecting, then spring it on him again.
Hermione had given her excuses to Lily and told her she would meet her in Hogsmeade that afternoon. She quickly made her way to the little village and waited in the alley beside the Three Broomsticks. She was only waiting a few minutes when she heard a pop beside her. He was wearing a hooded cape and came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. She quickly swallowed the bile and turned towards him with a huge smile on her face.
"What a pleasant surprise. What do you have planned for us?"
"I thought we might get a room in the Broomsticks and spend the day together." Hermione swallowed again after hearing this and she forced her head to nod.
"You read my mind. Let's go. I'm afraid I can't spend the whole day with you, I promised a friend that I would meet with her right after lunch and if I don't show up, she will have the whole school looking for me. Let's go, so we don't waste anymore time." She walked away and hoped that statement would make him disappointed enough that he would not want to talk to her for a little while and hopefully by the time he got over it, it would be almost time for her to leave. She also hoped it wouldn't make him angry enough to curse her. They got a room and made their way inside. Hermione's plan had worked, he was upset; she could tell by the way he made his way over to the table and sat down at it. She had figured out early on that he was just like a spoiled child. When they didn't get what they wanted or how they wanted, they would pout. She sat on the bed and waited for him to speak. After 15 minutes he finally spoke up.
"I was hoping to spend the entire day with you."
"I know you were and I am sorry, but you didn't give me much notice and I had already promised this friend a few days ago. I don't know what type of girls you are used to, but I will not neglect my friends to be with a man, especially if I have promised to do something with them beforehand. I am sorry if I have disappointed you, but if we keep dwelling on this, then we are going to waste all of our time together and I for one would much rather spend that time in pleasantness than ignoring one another." Hermione finished her statement and realised what she had just said. She sat there waiting to be cursed, but it never came. Instead he stood up and walked towards her, then picked her up and spun her around. She was completely caught off guard with this and it showed on her face.
"I'm sorry for startling you, but I have never met anyone like you before. Everyone I know is either too afraid to say anything to me or too dumb. You are the first person I know of that would say something like that knowing they could get cursed for it."
"I will not change who I am; just because others cower in fear in front of you, does not mean I will do the same. If that means that I get cursed, then so be it." Hermione held her chin in the air and looked at him with pride.
His laughter ripped through the air, completely out of place, like that sound wasn't supposed to be heard by anyone. "That's what I love about you, please don't ever change, especially not for me." He ended by kissing her firmly on the mouth. He deepened the kiss and soon she found herself lying on the bed with him leaning over her.
"It's my turn now," was all he said before he started to take her shirt off, then her bra and pants. The only thing left on her was her knickers and she kept telling herself over and over to pretend he was Remus. She felt her knickers slide down her legs and heard him suck a breath in. She had to keep her eyes closed, she wasn't sure that if she opened them she would be able to keep her breakfast down.
"Open your eyes and look at me!" His voice held no room for options and she slowly opened them. When she looked at him, she noticed he was wearing all of his clothes still. She only had a minute to ponder this before he grabbed her around the back of her thighs and brought them up to his face. She felt his tongue plunge into her and her body betrayed her. She could feel herself getting wetter and then a moan slipped out. She hated herself and made her mind focus on an image of Remus. She felt his tongue doing wonderful things to her and even though he didn't have the skill that Remus did, he was getting results. Before she knew it she felt herself clench up and release into his mouth, which he drank down greedily and noisily. She layed on the bed after trying to get herself back together, while he laid beside her in bliss.
"I could return the favour, if you like." In her head Hermione was screaming for him to say no and desperately hoping it was time to go.
Thankfully someone was looking out for her that day and he answered her, "No my dear, today was just about you. I told you I would return the favour and so I did. I rather enjoyed that. Contrary to popular belief I do enjoy pleasuring women, if they are the right ones and if they deserve it." He left the sentence hanging in the air.
Hermione knew it was time to take on a submissive role and replied back, "Thank you, My Lord, you are too good to me. I only hope I can keep up with your expectations."
He lifted her chin and said very slowly, "You could never disappoint me; it is I who has to try to keep up with you. I also insist that you stop with the My Lord stuff; please call me Tom." Hermione jerked her head up at this and looked at him full of shock.
He laughed again and said, "I know this must have shocked you, but I know that I can trust you and besides as I have said before, no one has ever made me feel this way before. I want to share a part of myself with you that I have never shared with anyone before." Hermione nodded her head and got up and dressed. She left that day thinking about all he had said to her. Was he really the heartless bastard everyone believed he was or was he just misunderstood? She was so confused now, but the one thing she did know was that it was Remus who held her heart and always would. She just wasn't sure anymore on her views of Voldemort, or Tom as he asked her to call him. She met Lily for an afternoon of shopping and tried to put her thoughts off to the side, but Lily could tell right away something was bothering her.
"Ok, what is it. We are not going any further until you tell me." Her red headed friend said to her.
Hermione told her what had happened that morning and her feelings on the matter. "I am so confused; he is supposed to be evil, but yet, he goes and does this. I am not confused as to whom I love, just everything I have believed before now. What am I going to do?"
"I can't answer that for you, but I do know that all of your true friends will be there for you, no matter what." Lily looked at her pointedly and walked off again. Yes, that was the one thing she could count on, her friends. The two girls walked away from the Three Broomsticks not noticing the beady eyes staring after them. The same beady eyes that had watched Hermione enter the room hours earlier with her guest.