It was a complete fluke that I thought of this fic. I'd received a review, thought about the story nonchalantly and then went on with my life. Then I watched "Frozen" the Disney movie. I was completely blown away. I had the idea in my head since. This chapter is inspired by the movie. The two sisters made me think so much of Mokuba and Seto. I really love this idea for a foundation of their childhood. I felt like it filled in a few gaps and although it is dark and sad, it does have brotherly fluff. I wonder if I could ever write something now that Mokuba and Seto are actually happy? But then I think, could victims really find happiness, can they really forget? The story was heavily influence by the songs "Let It Go" and "Do You Want To Build A Snowman" from the "Frozen" soundtrack. I hope you get as moved by "Frozen" as I did…or at least a little touched by this additional chapter. I tried to add an anchor between the first chapter and the second. It's funny how a stand-alone piece can create a complimentary addition.
Please let me know of any typos or mistakes! Characters belong to their respective owner. Shinoda, Kenichi is based on a real person.
There was a loud snap that resonated in the room. The pain usually made him jump or wince in pain. That seemed like such a long time ago.
"Seto. Be the good boy I've thought you to be." From another mouth, from a distant shadow in Seto's mind, that once would have reassured him. The sounds of his parents voice mingled momentarily in a soft hum in his ears.
He had learned his lesson long ago about letting this man see what those words did to him.
He no longer let him see.
He no longer let him in.
"Good boy." It had taken him a long time to shut everything out. To conceal how he felt in front of that man.
Another snap echoed in the room.
The brunette kept his arms out in front of him. Purple welts already started forming on his forearms. An impassive look remained on his face. He noticed how his offender's knuckled turned white. Anger piqued his abuser from the lack of his response. The small boy had figured long ago that the nerves in his arms could no longer send signals to his brain for the chronicle abuse he had withstood. Or perhaps, as the monster had intended, he had truly learned to control his body, nerve influx and all. A tiny unnoticeable twitch pulled the muscles in his cheek.
This was not the time to be joking around. He scolded himself disdainfully.
When the session was finally over, he returned to his books. Only when the door closed did the stinging hiss of pain make him grit his teeth. With a frown, he admitted he perhaps did not control his nerve influx at will.
Be the good boy I know you are. A lone tear glided down his cheek. For a while now, Seto wondered if it was God that spite him or that his parents' words were to comfort him. A way for him to know they never stopped loving him…to speak through the devil himself?
He wiped the tear away. A small flicker of warmth infected his stomach and pumped through his blood.
A small knock sounded at the door. It was barely perceivable.
"'toe?" Mokuba's soft voice reached his ears.
Instantly, the warmth in his body became ice. Coldness stilled his body.
"Will you let me in?"
With those words, Seto returned to his studies. This was his to bear. This was his to live. The less Mokuba knew, the more he kept him out, the longer he could protect him.
Isolation was the key, even if it killed him. Gozaburo would never have Mokuba.
"'toe?" Mokuba tried again. His face was scrunched up against the door. Couldn't Seto see how much he needed him?
How long had it been since he last saw him? Seto no longer came down for meals either. Maids brought it to his room.
"Won't you let me in?" He whispered.
His heart thudded painfully against his ribcage. Was that how it felt to have a heart attack, he wondered dejectedly.
It wasn't so long ago that he had gone into Seto's room and slept the night, hadn't it? It had been Seto's birthday. He smiled; despite the tears that fell from his eyes. It would be his birthday soon. Maybe, then, Seto would let him sleep in his bed again, as a birthday present?
He couldn't understand why Seto wouldn't come out. Hadn't he been good enough for him?
Hadn't he said he loved him enough?
No. Blackness tinted his heart. It was because it was his fault. Isn't that what his heart knew all along? Isn't that why it thudded so painfully in his chest? Because it was his fault they were here. It was his fault they had no parents.
Of course, he could never be good enough. Isn't that why he no longer opened the door? It was his fault.
If only he could tell him how sorry he was. Seto was everything to him, couldn't he see he just needed him so badly?
In his room that night, he cried himself to sleep. Choking on his sobs until his swollen eyes couldn't cry anymore.
It was just so lonely now. His heart thudded painfully.
When Seto had finished his studies, he made his way to Mokuba's room. He could see the faint traces of tears on his cheek.
Couldn't Mokuba see? Couldn't he understand?
He needed to let him go. He needed to runaway from him. Turn away, slam the door and go as far as he could. With that monster that slept a couple of rooms away, he needed to keep everything inside.
If the monster were to know how much he truly cared for Mokuba, he would win. Seto could withstand being hit with bamboo sticks and being held at knifepoint had long lost its fear. Eating the rotten, maggot infested food he brought him was solace to what that monster could really do.
A terror ran down his spin as he remembered the gunshot from a distant memory that ghost around his thoughts constantly.
Mokuba was too good. He wouldn't let anything hurt him, even if he needed to cut him out of his life. Even if he couldn't have Mokuba…
"As long as that monster breathes, I can't let you in. "
His heart thudded painfully against his ribcage; his heart broken once again.
It was his birthday today. He was sure. He was so sure if he were good, Seto would let him in.
Even this time, he didn't cry when Gozaburo hit him with the bamboo. The small boy rubbed his neck gently and winced slightly at the soreness. Gozaburo had said if he were stronger, maybe Seto would love him again.
Mokuba was older now. He knew he wouldn't drag Seto down anymore. Gozaburo even said he didn't cry as much when he hit him now. Wasn't he good enough for Seto yet?
"I love you, even if you hate me."
Maybe if I could say sorry, you could forgive me. He thought with an ache in his heart.
"I'll be here for you when you need me. I promise. Please just let me in."
"Would you like to know a secret, Seto?"
His chest tightened. That last time Gozaburo had shown him a secret he'd shot a man. A lesson, that he soon learned, that mo matter where he would hide, no matter where he would run, he would find him. He would find how to kill him. Even if the bullet never hit his own body, the monster could find ways to kill him.
"I let you win that chest game." He let out a guttural laugh. "You're such a naïve boy. I had a purpose for you, and you were just another part of my plan."
A cold sweat appeared over the young boys skin. The monster had played him from the start. How could he truly get rid of him?
When the door to the office opened, Gozaburo stood up and bowed to the man that entered. "Shinoda-san." He greeted respectfully.
With haste, the small boy fisted his hands and bowed respectfully to the man as well. Never had he seen the monster bow to anyone. The gentlemen regarded Seto for a moment with an expressionless face but ignored him as soon.
"I want a larger production of guns sent in Tokyo. Your shipments aren't large enough yet."
"Of course Shinoda-san." They continued talking about their transaction. How the organization was having difficulty finding good ground in Tokyo with the opposing men.
It was only then everything dawned on Kaiba. Shinoda, Kenichi. He could be the only one who would remove Kaiba, Gozaburo from his life.
At one time, long ago, the monster scared him. He did not anymore. The devil wouldn't scare him either.
It was time to see what he could really do. The fear that once invaded his body could no longer affect him. Letting go of it, letting go of everything cleared his mind. Gozaburo was simply a puppet in his game now. For the first time in a long time, Seto could finally breathe without the restraints of fear.
It was a couple of months later when Seto finally spoke to Shinoda, Kenichi. He'd nodded and smiled at him, silently listening to what Seto offered.
"My mother had blue eyes like yours. She was not so kind to pass them on."
Seto remained silent for a moment, "She left me more than I deserved." He admitted after a long moment.
"Family is important to me." Shinoda nodded, reminiscing a long ago memory.
"It is the only reason I breath."
Shinoda's lips pressed into a thin line, a grim appearance on his face as he contemplated how Seto could alter his own future.
"Separate the public image of such a history of violence will come at more than just that cost." He regarded Seto almost fondly. "I can respect a man that will do anything for family."
A couple of weeks later, Seto sat before him once again. He watched as Shinoda filled his cup with Sake until it almost poured down the sides. His own cup was not filled completely. In mirror image, he brought the cup to his lips and drank some. He exchanged his cup with Shinoda and repeated the ceremony until both cups were empty.
With a barely noticeable nod to Seto, he could barely make out the words he spoke to him over the shouts of the men. "You are my son now."
Many men came over and squeezed Seto's shoulder lightly; he noticed only a couple of men that had snubs as pinkies. Finally, could he admire for the first time, the oni, koi, dragons and lions that painted men's bodies.
It took a little longer to have his plan completely fulfilled.
Soon it would be Seto's birthday again. Mokuba looked dejectedly at Seto's bedroom door. He leaned his head against it. He didn't cry this time. He didn't say anything this time.
Won't you let me in? He wondered as he grabbed his chest where his heart beat painfully against his hand.
Aren't I good enough for you now?
A small tickle of blood ran down his neck. Gozaburo had made him bleed once again.
With a nasty smile Seto finally spoke to Gozaburo. "I found a purpose for you, and now you're just a part of my plan."
Hatred blazed in the large mans eyes. He pursed his lips and bent down to Seto's ear, "and I touched what you couldn't hid. If only you could have been the good boy I taught you to be. "
It was the monster that had the satisfaction to see the tears run down Seto's face. He laughed, the bellowing voice echoing in the room as he jumped out the window.
Seto couldn't look at Mokuba for a long time after the monster's death. He had failed him. He'd hurt Mokuba.
For a moment he had been free. The rules had been beneath him. He had won. He had freedom in his grasp. Too quickly had he been reminded that he could never be enough.
He could never go back now. Everything was in the past and it could never return. It could never go back to what it was. He could never give Mokuba enough. Never could he give Mokuba what he truly deserved.
He'd failed Mokuba. He'd never be able to make it up to him…their parents' death, the orphanage and bringing that monster into his life. He was left with only few memories of when Mokuba would come to his room all those nights ago.
"I'm sorry I couldn't be better for you."
Gozaburo was gone now. Mokuba stood infront of Seto's room and placed his hand on the doorknob. Gozaburo had died a few weeks ago.
Why couldn't Seto look at him?
His lips twitched. He knew why his brother couldn't look at him. Even Gozaburo had known. Mokuba had accepted long ago that it was his fault this had happened.
It was his fault their parents died. It was his fault they stayed so long at the orphanage. It was his fault Gozaburo hurt him. The faint voice of Gozaburo, from long ago, confirmed Mokuba's fears.
Without you, Mokuba, Seto would have been happy. That's why you cry at night, isn't it? Because you know, it's your fault.
Seto stood in front of the large mirror in his room. He touched the colour that was imprinted in his skin near his shoulder. The symbol forever imprinted within his DNA.
A trade sealed in ink; a family mark that would protect him.
His door opened with a creak and he turned around, clutching his shoulder tightly. His heart thudded irregularly at being caught.
Shyly Mokuba looked at him, his eyes twinkling in hope and his hand grasping tightly at his chest.
"I…" Mokuba looked at Seto. Words lost before they could come out.
"Will you let me in?" he tried again, his voice cracking, tears spilling from his eyes. "Will you let me in?"
Seto crumpled on his knees in front of Mokuba. He buried his head in his brother's stomach and held him as tightly as he could. "I'm sorry I couldn't be enough." He sobbed loudly.
Mokuba kneeled with his brother, hugging him tightly as silent tears trickled from his eyes.
Gozaburo was gone. The monster was dead. They had each other now.
"Can't you see? You're the only reason I breathe."