"I'm in love with you!"

The words burst from my lips like a firework exploding from the ground. And it had a similar effect: Kyoya and Tamaki froze, staring open-mouthed at me. My eyes went wide. I was a deer caught in the headlights. I didn't. There's no way. I didn't.

Yes, you did, a nasty voice whispered in my head.

Suddenly, I wasn't a deer caught in headlights. I was a deer caught in the sights of two enthusiastic hunters with loaded guns. And so I turned and bolted like one.

I didn't bother to look back. I knew they weren't chasing me. But I kept running like Satan himself was biting at my heels. I didn't let myself feel; I couldn't afford to break down now. The sun was setting behind me, and my shadow got longer and longer. For some reason, this made me want to cry more.

I don't know how long it took, but the streetlights were already on when I turned the corner onto my street. I dashed up the stairs, ripped my keys from my pocket, threw open the door, and slammed and bolted the lock. Dad wasn't home yet; good, I could go to pieces alone.

I almost forgot to take off my shoes in my desperation to get to my room. I curled up in a ball on my bed, staring at the wall by the door. I drowned in misery. My most well-guarded secret….

Now he knew. The reason I get up in the morning, the reason I pretend to be ignorant of everyone else's feelings, the reason I drown myself in schoolwork, the reason I listen to those syrupy love songs that make your heart gain five pounds of bittersweet longing… It's him. He's the reason I can move forward. But I couldn't ever tell him how I felt, because it would tear the whole Host Club apart, and all my friends with it.

I tried to stop it in the beginning, when I'd recognized my feelings. But he was such a mystery. Behind his calm façade, I could see glimpses of who he really was. I saw kindness, nobility, fearlessness, courage, and a little sadness. And as I looked deeper behind the façade, I fell deeper and deeper, until I was so in love I couldn't breathe.

But that's over now, isn't it? The nasty voice cooed in my mind's ear. He knows, Haruhi. They both do. I started to cry.

Through the sounds of my broken heart, I thought I heard an annoyingly cheerful electronic sound. The cell phone Hikaru and Kaoru had given me was still in my bag…

I dragged myself up and dug it out. My heart stopped when I saw who it was, and instantly chided myself. Who did you think it was going to be? "This is Haruhi."

"Hi Haruhi."
My heart took off in double time. His voice sounded like music. A small voice in my heart sang, it's him!, and I did my best to quash it.

"So, about earlier...tonight…" he continued, sounding awkward and unaware of the emotional battle going on inside me and completely wonderful.

I didn't have the guts to say anything. I stood there in the dark room, the streetlight outside casting shadows on my bare feet, my heart at war with the rest of me.

"Did you mean it?"

I felt like I'd lost about thirty IQ points. This was going in a completely different direction than I'd imagined. "Ummm…" I stalled, trying to gather my intelligence as fast as I could. I decided to go with playing dumb. "Mean what?"

Awkward pause. "What you said, before you ran away."

Another awkward pause. I couldn't think of a good enough answer, and it was with the feeling of hitting a self-destruct button that I said, truthfully, "Yes."

The pause that followed wasn't awkward. It was agony contained in the space of a few seemingly endless seconds.

"Haruhi-"

The knob on the front door turned. Dad was home early, and he would give me the third degree if he saw me on a cell phone that he didn't give to me. His tone was so warm when he said my name, and it killed me to do it, but I snapped the phone shut and threw it across the room onto my pillow.

"I'm home!"

"Welcome home Dad." I forced a calm expression and went out to greet him. "I'll get dinner started."

I survived dinner and escaped to my room as fast as I could. I hadn't heard my phone ring, and that made me feel a mixture of relief and pain. I closed my door and pulled my books out of my bag, preparing to throw myself into homework.

The phone chirped once. I snatched it up and flipped it open. "New Text Message". I clicked it open.

"We'll talk tomorrow. Meet me at the fountain before school. There's something I want to tell you."

The tone was businesslike, casual even, but the last sentence caused a bowling ball of dread to drop into my stomach. I closed the phone and held it to my chest as terror set in.

I sped through my homework, not really caring if I did it correctly. When I was done, I searched frantically for something else to do.

The solution that came to my mind was a strange one, but somehow felt perfectly right.

I had to go apologize to him. An outburst like that, directed at a Senpai. Add it to the list of things I'd done wrong today. First I'd gone over to Tamaki's, when I knew I shouldn't've. Then the outburst, and the rude way of leaving… I needed to apologize. He'd been there too, and he's been a good friend to me. Before all this explodes, I should make that clear.

I climbed out my bedroom window onto the tree outside and dropped to the ground. I started walking, my thoughts in a hopeless snare.

The house was dark, but the light was on in one of the rooms on the ground floor. I took a peek in the window, and my heart stopped for the third time that day.

Tamaki and Kyoya were standing in the middle of a massive living room, both red faced and breathing hard, clearly fighting with one another. I listened hard, and I could make out what they were shouting.

"She said it to me!"

"She'd just left MY house! She was there to confess to me!"

"But she was looking at me!"

"No, she was looking at me!"

"Fool! You're engaged to that DePierre girl, aren't you? Everyone knows. She wouldn't confess to someone who's already spoken for."

My heart broke. Unfortunately, so did the branch I didn't realize I'd been leaning on. Both boys flashed to the window and threw it open, hitting me hard in the forehead and sending me flying back onto the grass.

"Haruhi?!"

My eyes were filling; I wasn't sure if it was with tears or blood. Probably both. I didn't care about the head wound. All I could feel was the shattered pieces of my heart stabbing me in the lungs. It hurt to breathe. Engaged…

"Kyoya! Call a doctor!" Tamaki shouted. "Hold on, Haruhi!"

I started seeing gray spots. I was blacking out…

"Haruhi…"

Hands caressed my face. I knew they were his; even on the border of unconsciousness, they still sent sparks through my skin.

I'm okay with going this way, I thought, and the last thing I heard as I drifted into blackness was his beautiful voice, saying, "Stay with me."

My last thought was:

Always…