Everything

Derek reluctantly handed Delia back to Izzie, retrieving his beeping pager out of his pocket. He had been sitting there for three hours, but it only felt like a few minutes. He could never get enough time with his daughter. He made his way through the hallways, stopping quickly to change into scrubs, and proceeded to the ER to see what was going on.

Bailey was waiting by the doors, so he knew he had a few minutes before his case would be there. He needed to check on Meredith, but he wouldn't have been paged unless it was important, so he would have to wait. The ambulance pulled up and the paramedics opened the back, and he saw Bailey run up to the stretcher, listening to stats on the way through the doors.

"Ok people! We have a female, unidentified, 23 years old, two car accident. She has been unconscious since found at the scene. Her right pupil is blown. They believe that her head hit the windshield."

"Ok, Bailey, lets get her up to CT, and i want a full work up. I think she's probably going to have to have surgery. Lets go!" Derek yelled as he took off down the hallway.

About twenty minutes later, Derek sat at the table studying the CT scans of the young woman. "She's got a sub-arachnoid hemorrhage and we need to operate immediately. Go prep her for surgery and meed me in the OR as soon as possible." Derek said to the intern, and he jumped up and shot out the door. Derek put his head in his hands and took a few deep breaths before getting up and heading to the scrub room.

----------------------------------------------------

Meredith stirred awake, seeing Izzie sitting in the chair next to her bed knitting a blanket. She slowly sat up and looked around, half expecting to see Derek in the room. She put her hand to her head, the pounding nearly unbearable, so she lay back down and looked over at her.

"Do you need anything Mer?" Izzie said with a smile, as she sat her knittng down and stood up from the chair. Meredith didn't know what to expect. She knew that she had let all of her friends down. Most of all, she had let down Delia. She couldn't even be a good mom. Why was Izzie being nice?

"No Iz, I'm fine." She nodded and sat back down, resuming her knitting. We both sat in silence for what seemed like ages. "I'm sorry." She said to Izzie, not even recognizing her own voice as it came from her mouth. Meredith broke down crying, realizing the extent to what I had done.

"Mer, listen. No one is mad at you. We just want you to be healthy. You have Delia to care for and you aren't being responsible. Just please promise you will get help. Please Meredith?" Izzie pleaded with a look of worry in her eyes. It was breaking Meredith's heart. She was truly sorry for what she had done.

"Ok. Iz, I'll get help. We will call a psychiatrist first thing in the morning. That or I will go to a support group." Meredith responded. "Thank you Mer." Izzie smiled at Meredith, and walked over to the bed with her knitting.

"I'm making Delia a Baby Blanket, ya know, kind of a late birth present." Izzie said beaming. Meredith's heart sunk. Her friends still supported her after the horrible person she's been. "Oh, Iz. You didn't have to do that."

"Don't mention. it." Izzie replied.

"Iz, who has been watching Delia today? And where is Derek?" Meredith asked, with a look of concern. What if he had left again. Maybe he thought he couldn't handle all of this again.

"Well, Derek watched her most of the afternoon, and then he got paged to the ER, so Lexie's got her right now. I can call her if you would like to see her" Izzie said.

"Derek watched her? But I thought he didn't want anything to do with her Iz." Meredith said, wide-eyed.

"He actually came up and asked me. He's a natural with her. Its amazing how much of a bond a parent can form with their child, in just the first few hours. He loves her, and I can tell he's still in love with you. He wants to be apart of everything, Mer."

"I just don't know. He hurt me so bad, but i know I can't keep her from him. I just don't want to get my heart broken again."

"Just do what feels right. Your the only one that can decide what your heart wants. I'm gonna go grab something from the cafeteria. I'll be back ok?" Izzie said as she made her way towards the door.

"Okay" Meredith said as she relaxed into her pillow. She turned on the tv and started flipping through, finding nothing interesting to watch. A nurse came in and checked her vitals and replaced the bag on her iv, smiling at her as she headed back out into the hallway. Meredith was alone again, and it was not a feeling that she enjoyed. She just wanted someone to love her. Someone who would love her and never leave.

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"Hey Lexie" Finn said as he walked up to her in the waiting area. "Thanks for calling me and updating me on Meredith, I've been worried about her." He said with a friendly smile.

"No problem. She should be going home tomorrow. Iz is up there and she said she would come tell me when she's awake, so it would probably be better if we wait down here." Lexie replied, trying to keep a fussy Delia happy.

"Do you mind if I hold her?" Finn asked.

"Sure." Lexie replied, handing her over. "I'm gonna run to the restroom, ok?"

"Go head, I've got her." He said making faces at the 5-week old.