The next day, Pepper took Tony to the mall to go bra shopping.

"This is embarrassing." He grumbled as Pepper led him by the hand to the underwear section.

"You're a girl now, no one will look twice. Now come on; you can't just walk around without underwear all the time, and you're sure as hell not borrowing mine."

"Aww, but why not? You know I always loved the little purple-polka-dotted ones." That earned him a slap on the hand.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For managing to be a dick even when you don't have one anymore."

"That was uncalled for."

"Here we are." They had arrived in the bra section of the store. "Do you have the card we wrote your size down on?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, then let's start looking." The two began to scour the racks for something that would suit Tony's taste, and he soon noticed something.

"Why do almost all of these have padding in the bottom?"

Pepper turned. "They're called push-ups. They're to make your breasts look bigger."

"But why? What's so great about having big breasts?"

"What, you don't like girls with big chests?"

"No, no that's not what I meant. I like all girls, not matter how big their- oh god, even in the junior's section!" Pepper raised an eyebrow, though not disapprovingly. Something about watching famous womanizer Tony Stark go on what was basically a feminist rant warmed her heart. "God, what makes girls feel like they have to do this, Pepper?" Tony asked, distressed.

"I'll tell you what." Pepper said, distracting him with a black number with pink polka-dots. "You try this on, and we can discuss beauty culture and feminism later."

As they walked toward the checkout lane with enough underwear to last Tony at least until he got changed back, something caught his eye and he stopped short. "What is it?" Pepper asked, turning to see what he was staring at. She rolled her eyes when she saw. It was a black miniskirt cut way above the knees. "You do not need that." Pepper said.

"Yeah, but I sure as hell want it!" Tony said, grabbing the skirt from the rack without a second thought and starting back off toward the cash register.

"Aren't you at least going to try it on?" Pepper said as she caught up to him.

"I don't have to. I can tell already how hot I'll look in it." Pepper rolled her eyes. Somehow, having Tony Stark as a girlfriend was harder than having him as a boyfriend.

When they got back to the tower, they were greeted by an interesting scene.

"What the hell happened here?" Tony asked Thor, who was covered in singe marks, along with Loki, Steve and the entire kitchen.

"Well…" Thor began.

"I was t-trying to make puh-pop tarts!" Loki stuttered, distressed. "And the sp-spell went wrong, and I h-hurt big b-brother and friend S-Steve!"

Tony's heart absolutely melted at the sight. He knelt down and ruffled the kid's hair. Loki looked up, snot dripping down his face. "Hey." Tony said. "It's alright, huh? I'm rich, I can rebuild the kitchen. And Steve and your brother over there? They're practically indestructible. What about you, are you alright?" Loki nodded. "Okay. So how about you go take a bath and wash off some of that charcoal, huh?" Loki nodded again. "Thor, I think that's your job." Tony said. Thor took Loki's hand and led him away to the bathroom, as Steve took the opposite direction toward his own shower. When he stood again, Pepper was looking at him incredulously. "What?" Tony asked. "What's wrong?"

"Tony Stark acting motherly?" Pepper said in mock-disbelief. "What's next, Fury petting kittens?"

"Har-de-har har. You didn't expect me to just tell him to suck it up, did you?"

"Well, no, but… I'm really proud of you, you know that?" She stepped up to Tony and kissed him. Actually, the first kiss since he had changed the other day. She stepped back. "Wow. That was…"

"Different?" Tony said with one eyebrow raised.

"Yeah."

"What do you say we see how 'different' other things are, hm?"

"I swear, you're just as bad as you were when you were a guy!" Pepper exclaimed, swacking him gently on the side of the head.

Tony grinned. "Hey, a Stark is a Stark is a Stark."

"I should have taken that into account." Pepper grumbled.

"Come on, Peps! Are you really saying we can't until I turn back?"

Pepper smiled in spite of herself. "Maybe later. If you're good."

"Then I shall try my best to be the pinnacle of good behavior!"

"Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts. Just go play some video games or something, I have some business to take care of."

"Business meaning?" Tony asked her as she left.

"Meaning literal business. Later, okay Tony?"

"Bye, Peps." Tony did take her advice, and, (after putting on the miniskirt that, as expected, did make his ass look amazing) ended up cross-legged on the couch playing Grand Theft Auto. "Holy shit! Say goodbye to your chopper, dude!" He shouted in delight as he wreaked havoc on the virtual cityscape. That's when he heard a wolf whistle from the corner, and looked up to see Clint leaning against the doorway. "Ah, what is it, shitface?"

"You probably shouldn't be sitting like that." Tony's brow furrowed in thought before he finally realized; you can't really sit cross-legged in a miniskirt.

"Screw you." He said as he adjusted himself on the couch. "You were probably enjoying the view, anyway."

Clint laughed. "Ha! You wish. You'd love a piece of this action." Tony grinned as he flipped the archer off, making him laugh again.

"Either piss off, or get over here and run over innocent citizens with me."

"I'll take door number two, thank you." The two spent a while on the couch hijacking ice-cream trucks for fun before Pepper appeared in the doorway.

"Oh, Tony?" She said, one eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, Peps?"

"Remember that offer from earlier?" Tony dropped the controller and raced out of the room.

Author's Note: Okay, let's be honest; that was pretty OOC. But push-ups was something I really wanted to rant about, so there it is.