Chapter Twelve

I open my eyes to the warm sunlight streaming in through my bedroom window. My hand is throbbing and I groan softly as I stretch out on my bed and find I'm not alone. I look over next to me and see Satsu sleeping soundly on her stomach with her face turned away from me. I reach out with my left hand and gently stroke her hair and she stirs slightly and turns to look at me.

"Hey," I whisper softly, smiling a little as she raises a hand to touch the bandage over her forehead lightly. "How are you feeling?"

"Been better," she sighs. "You?"

"Same."

Satsu smiles as she leans in for a light kiss and groans softly as she rolls onto her back and holds her hand to her forehead. "That was some fight last night, wasn't it?"

"Yeah."

"Overheard Giles saying that this is only the beginning. Buffy, what if we can't win this? There's just too many of them and not enough of us."

"We'll get through it," I say softly, not believing my own words either. "How did you end up here in my bed?"

"Faith brought me up. I think she just wanted to sleep in my bed."

"Faith brought you in here?" I ask, raising an eyebrow and asking myself why she would do that.

Satsu nods her head slowly and closes her eyes. I see a few tears slide down her cheeks slowly and I reach out to wipe them away. When more tears begin to fall, I lean in and kiss each of them away, wishing I knew what was going through her head right now since I know she isn't crying because she's in pain.

"Don't cry," I whisper as I move to kiss her lips softly. "Please don't cry, Satsu."

"I don't even know why I'm crying," she says with a short laugh as she opens her eyes and looks at me. "I don't know if I can do this, Buffy."

"Do what?"

"Fight Falken," she whispers in reply. "We're in over our heads, aren't we?"

"No, we aren't. We'll get through this. We'll take him out and put an end to this, okay?"

"You aren't the only one having those dreams, Buffy," she says as she takes my left hand in hers and intertwines our fingers. "We can't win this. We don't have enough on our side to win this."

The hopelessness in her voice is heartbreaking and I know she might just be right. We don't have enough on our side and even if we did, not all of us would walk away from this fight against Falken and his army he has gathered down in Hell city and beyond. I let go of her hand and pinch the bridge of my nose, forcing back the tears I can feel threatening to fall and the headache that seems like it will never go away. I don't know what we're going to do and although that feeling isn't the first time I've ever felt it, the hopelessness Satsu is feeling isn't helping me think otherwise.

I know we can gather up our own army, I know we can fight Falken and possibly stop him before he opens any of the Hellmouths around the world. I know we can because we are strong and there's no way any of us are about to let him get away with unleashing a literal Hell on earth. I haven't come this far in my life to let it all be taken away by someone-or something-like Falken.

I get up from bed and walk over to the window, opening it to let the fresh morning air inside. I look out over the quiet neighbourhood that's been home for the last four years and I wonder what all those people would think if they truly knew that those stories they've told their kids about the things that go bump in the night really are true. I feel Satsu wrap her arms around me and I sigh into the embrace, wishing things weren't so complicated right now and that I could truly enjoy spending some time alone with her just like we did before things with Faith had started.

"I miss this," she whispers against my neck as she plants light kisses along my pulse point. "I miss just being with you and only you."

"I miss it too."

I turn around in her arms and kiss her softly, melting in the softness of her lips and her warm embrace. It's hot with Faith, I can admit that much, but with Satsu, it's different. It feels more real because it is real. I stop the kiss from going any further and I pull back just enough to stare into her deep brown eyes. She has so much innocence in her eyes that it makes me wonder why she wants to be with someone like me and why she is in love with me when she deserves someone who loves her back. I raise my good hand and gently cup her face and she smiles as I lean in for a soft kiss.

A soft knock on the door makes me pull away from her before she can kiss me back and I drop my hand from her cheek as Willow opens the door and walks in. She smiles over at both of us as she closes the door behind her and motions for us to sit on the bed.

"I was hoping you two would be awake," she says as we all sit down on the bed together facing each other. "Giles has been on the phone all night, rallying the troops around the world. I thought you two would want to know what's going on."

"So, are they all coming here?" I ask her even though I already know the answer to that question.

"Where are we going to put everyone?" Satsu asks and Willow and I both laugh.

"Giles is going to set them all up at a motel not too far from here. The first dozen girls should be arriving later tonight from New York and LA, the rest over the next couple of days."

"And what about Vi and Rona?"

"They are coming with their team tomorrow," Willow replies as she fiddles with the hem of her shirt. "Robin is coming with them."

"Oh."

Robin and I aren't on good terms and I know he and Faith haven't spoken since their little relationship that lasted barely a month after we left Sunnydale. It was a mess and we all saw the fallout that came afterwards when Robin caught Faith screwing around behind his back. It took Robin almost a year to get back with Vi and Rona's team in Scotland and despite everything, we all knew he was a vital member of their team, acting as their Watcher when nobody else was there for them. I know that Faith is going to completely lose it when she finds out he's coming. I know he's the last person she ever wants to see again and I know we're going to have a lot of problems on our hands if she does lose it and takes off like she did the last time. We can't afford to lose her, not now, not in the middle of this fight with Falken.

"Believe me, Buffy, I tried to tell Giles we don't need Robin, but he didn't want to hear it. He told me that we all need to put our differences aside and a part of me agrees with him. Robin is a solid fighter and we can use everyone we can get on our side right now."

"What happened between you guys and Robin?" Satsu asks. "I never got to hear the whole story."

"It's a long story," I say softly. "One I really don't want to talk about right now. Or ever. Just don't mention anything to Faith, okay?"

"Okay," Satsu nods and smiles a little. "So, we're getting our army, aren't we?"

"Slowly, yes," Willow says and she breathes in deeply. "This is going to be a bigger fight than the fight against the First, Buffy. We really need to try to get one step ahead of Falken right now."

"How are we supposed to do that?"

"I really don't know."

We both sigh and Satsu reaches for my hand, offering a tiny bit of comfort as she strokes her thumb over mine. The three of us sit there on my bed for a little while, not talking and barely looking at one another. We're all deep in thought and although I should be thinking about what we should be doing when it comes to Falken, all I can think about is how to tell Satsu about what's been going on between Faith and me. It is just added stress I really can't take right now, but I can't avoid it forever. Sooner or later she's going to find out what's going on between Faith and me and I'm not so sure I can deal with the fallout that'll follow when we're in the middle of an apocalyptic fight with Falken.

We join the others downstairs shortly before lunch and find them all deep in an intense conversation about Falken. I take a seat next to Faith on the couch and she barely looks my way as she tells Giles every detail she can remember about the woman that was with Falken when he held us captive.

"What was her name?" Giles asks as he thumbs through an old, worn leather book twice as thick as any other book he owns. "Vivienne you said?"

"That's what he called her," Faith nods in reply and she turns to look at me. "Was that her name, B?"

"Yeah."

"Oh lord," Giles says under his breath when he stops on a page about halfway through the thick book. "Oh good lord."

"What?" We all ask in unison at the same time.

"Vivienne is one of the vampire queens that was long ago believed to have been banished to the underworld by the Powers that Be. Most believed she had been killed by a Slayer in the thirteenth century. Are you absolutely certain that her name was Vivienne?"

"Positive, G. Don't think it's some wannabe vamp calling herself that in honour of her or some shit? 'Cause I can't tell you how many Lestat's I've run into over the years."

"What else can you tell me about her?"

"Other than the fact that Falken was ordering her around like she was nothing more than a common slave to him? Nothing."

"Did she wear a necklace of any sorts, perhaps? Something like this?" Giles asks and he hands Faith the book.

I look down at the illustration with Faith and we both nod our heads at the same time. In those few brief seconds we were near Vivienne there was no mistaking that necklace for the one she'd been wearing. Giles takes the book back and I know from the look on his face that we have much bigger problems than we originally thought we have. I rest my broken hand in my lap as I sit back on the couch, waiting for Giles to speak because I know he's trying to figure out a way to say whatever it is he's about to say. I know that look on his face when there's bad news and it makes my stomach twist in knots.

"If she indeed wore this," he says after a few minutes of complete silence, "then we are not only dealing with Falken, a half-demon shape shifter fully intent on opening every Hellmouth in the world, we are also dealing with a very old and very powerful vampire queen."

"Great. Can this get any worse?" Faith asks as she shakes her head. "What kind of powers she got, G? Nothing we can't fight against, right?"

"She has power over every vampire that is on this earth right now. I believe Falken has become allies with her, using her power to create himself an army to protect himself while he opens each Hellmouth in the world. This is far greater than we thought it was and I'm afraid," Giles sighs as he looks around at all of us before his eyes fall upon me. "I'm afraid we won't have the power to fight them all if they are all indeed recruited into Falken's ever growing army."

"That's thousands of vampires, isn't it?" Satsu asks as she slowly sits down on the arm of the couch next to me. "We can't fight thousands of vampires."

"Hundreds of thousands," Giles replies softly. "Millions possibly. Unfortunately."

"So, anyone feel like a drink 'cause I can definitely use one right about now," Faith says as she stands up and heads for the kitchen. "Anyone?"

"I'll take a beer," Xander says from where he's standing by the front hallway. "Possibly a shot of Jack if you got any."

"I do not think drinking at a time like this is the wisest choice, Faith," Giles says as he walks over to the bookshelf by the TV and pulls out a bottle of Scotch that I had no idea was there. "Then again, it looks as if the end of the world is upon us. If you're going to drink, at least drink the good stuff."

I roll my eyes as Faith disappears into the kitchen and returns a minute later with enough glasses for everyone. I pass on drinking, not really feeling in the mood to drink before noon despite the hopelessness we all feel right now with this whole Falken situation. I slip out of the living room and go sit out back underneath the tree at the far end of the yard. I hoped for some time alone, but Satsu follows me and I don't tell her to leave when she sits down next to me.

"What do you think is going to happen, Buffy?"

"I don't know, Satsu, I really don't know."

"We are all going to die, aren't we?"

I shake my head no as I grab onto her hand tightly. "We are not going to die, Satsu. We've saved the world many times before and we can do it again."

"We don't have a chance against Falken, Vivienne and their vampire army, Buffy, and you know it."

"Doesn't mean we have to back away and not go out without a fight. This is not how we deal with things and we're not going to start now."

"Have you ever been scared, Buffy? Aren't you scared right now?"

"Terrified," I reply softly. "I don't even know what we're going to do and I don't know how we're going to stop him and I don't know how we're going to get one step ahead of him when he's already a hundreds steps ahead of us."

I know we'll figure something out, one way or another and I know we're going to need all the help we can get right now. There just aren't enough Slayers old enough to fight to stand by our side as we face off against Falken and his vast vampire army. There is no easy way out of this, there never is, but I have the faintest bit of hope that we can find a crack to slip through to end this once and for all. I close my eyes as I rest my head on Satsu's shoulder and block out the sounds of drunken laughter that soon drifts out from inside the house. If everyone keeps this attitude up, we're definitely doomed.

It's late by the time Satsu and I go inside. I can't believe we'd spent the entire afternoon out there alone under the tree, neither of us saying a single word, just holding onto one another as we drifted in and out of a light sleep. With everything that's going on, I know that is the last thing we should have been doing, but with everyone inside getting drunk and acting like irresponsible teenagers, there wasn't much else we could do.

"You think everyone passed out by now?" Satsu asks as we walk into the dark house together. "And weren't some of the teams coming tonight?"

"They're probably at the motel Giles was talking about setting them up in," I shrug and I flip on the kitchen light as I nearly trip over a sleeping Xander on the floor. "Great. Just great. Xander?" I say as I kneel down next to him and shake him a little. "Wake up."

"Hmm? It's too early, mom," he mumbles as he rolls over and pulls the couch cushion close to his chest. I yank it away from him and slap him lightly across the chest. "Huh, what? Oh, it's just you, Buff."

"What the hell are you sleeping on the kitchen floor for?"

"Drank too much," he groans softly as he sits up and wipes the drool from the side of his mouth. "I tell you, can't keep up with Giles and Faith. They have a bottomless stomach and an endless tolerance for high amounts of alcohol."

"Go to bed," I say softly to him as I help him to his feet. "Satsu, can you make sure he gets to his room? I'm going to check on the others."

She nods and helps him out of the kitchen while I head for the living room, careful to step over the sleeping girls and I spot Giles curled up on the chair clutching the nearly empty bottle of Scotch in his hands. Faith is nowhere to be seen and I head upstairs to my room, knowing just where to find her. I sigh as I flip on my light and find her sprawled on my bed, half-naked with her face buried in my pillow. I grab the throw blanket out of the closet and throw it over her and I'm about to leave when she grabs onto my hand.

"Stay," she whispers softly. "Please stay, B."

I groan as I wrench my wrist from her tight grasp and I walk to the door as Satsu comes down the hallway. "Faith passed out on my bed," I say softly to her and I sigh softly at the disapproving look in her eyes. "Go to bed, I'll come join you in a bit, okay?"

"You won't be long?"

"No," I promise her, sneaking in a quick kiss before I step back into my room and close the door quietly, making sure it's locked before I flip off the light and make my way over to my bed. "God, I can't believe how stupid you guys are drinking like that," I mutter under my breath as I slip off my shoes, my socks and I get into bed next to Faith. "Just don't drool on me, okay?"

She mumbles in her drunken state incoherently as she rolls over and wraps an arm around me. I lay there staring up at the ceiling knowing I'm not going anywhere for the rest of the night.