Its Been a While

Meredith traced her fingers over the outline of Dereks face in their wedding picture. They looked happy, conent. That is all that Meredith could wish for. To be happy, with no worry. She had been sitting there for hours, not able to go back to sleep. She had to be up for work in less than 2 hours so she just decided to wait it out. She was stressed about going back to work, worried to death about Delia going to the daycare. She didn't know if she would be able to give her away to someone she didn't know for her full shift. The only thing that would comfort her at this point, was that Delia would at least be in the same building with her if something went wrong.

She sat the picture down and grabbed another stack out of the box from their wedding. She secretly hoped they would have another box just like that one day, but she wouldn't tell Derek that.

It's been a while

Since I could hold my head up high

and it's been a while

Since I first saw you

It's been a while

since i could stand on my own two feet again

and it's been a while

since i could call you

Derek couldn't bring himself to get out of bed. He had been lying awake for what seemed like hours. Meredith couldn't sleep. She only did that when something was bothering her. He didn't know what to do, or how to fix it. He had expierenced this many times when they had been married. She would dissapear in the middle of night for a while and try to sneak back into bed before the alarm so he wouldn't worry, but he always knew. He didn't know wether to go find her this time, or still act oblivious to her nightime wanderings.

He wondered what she was doing at this moment. Walking around the living room. Milling around the kitchen. He tossed and turned in the sheets, staring at the clock on the bedside table, trying to decide what to do. Last year he would have stayed in bed, but Derek wasn't the same person he was then. He wasn't even close.

But everything I can't remember as fucked up as it may seem

the consequences that I've rendered

I've stretched myself beyond my means

Meredith quickly stuffed the boxes back into the closet, and shut the door as quielty as she could. She had to make it back in bed before the alarm. As she turned to walk through the door she ran straight into Derek, knocking her backwards, but before she hit the ground she felt herself land in his arms. He brought her back up to face him, but before speaking a word, he gave her a soft, sensual kiss, causing Meredith's world to spin momentarily.

"Baby, What's wrong? Is everything ok? I woke up and you were gone." He said as he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"Derek, I'm sorry. I just can't sleep. I'm worried." She replied. "I've had a lot on my my lately, with the baby, and Rose. It's really nothing I promise."

He knew she was lying. It wasn't nothing. "Mer, you've been doing this for the past two years. When something is seriously bothering you, I can never find you in my arms. I wake up alone."

"You knew, Derek?" She said, wide eyed. She had hoped he never knew.

"Yes Mer. I knew. I just never came to find you until now. I've changed. If its me your worried about, please don't let it be. I am in love with you. I know its been a while since you have seen the good side of me. I know I always tend to make things bad, but everything seems to dissapear when I'm with you. That is why I decided to find you this time. You need me as much as I need you." He said as he felt a smile come across his face.

She pulled him close and buried her head in his chest, feeling safe and warm.

It's been a while

since i could say that i wasn't addicted and

It's been a while

Since I could say I love myself as well and

It's been a while

Since I've gone and fucked things up just like i always do

It's been a while

But all that shit seems to disappear when i'm with you

But everything I can't remember as fucked up as it may seem

the consequences that I've rendered

I've gone and fucked things up again

Meredith finished getting Delia buckled in the car seat and climbed in the passenger seat. Derek was grabbing her coffee and they were about to head to work. Work. It sounded so weird to think of it. Would she still be a good resident? It had been nearly three months since Delia had been born.

She reached for Derek's hand as they nearned the hospital. They dropped Delia at the daycare together and walked hand in hand to the elevator. Meredith felt like she could do anything with Derek near her.

"You're going to do fine, Mer." He said as he sqeezed her hand. They stepped off and he gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before heading down the hallway. Meredith stood in place for a second, taking in the all to familiar surroundings. She finally started to walk, traveling straight for the locker room, remembering it just like it was yesterday.

She changed into her light blue scrubs and white coat, closed her locker and headed towards the nurses station to check the charts. She was waiting for Bailey to meet her down there and she wanted to get up to date with the patients.

"Good Morning Dr. Grey" Dr. Sloan said startling her, breaking her concentration on the paperwork she was going over.

"Oh! Hi Mark. How are you? You scared me." She replied giggling.

"I'm good. How have you been? I haven't seen Derek in a couple of days. Is everything ok?" He asked.

"Well, its been a bit rough around the edges, but things are getting better everday. You should come to dinner sometime, I know that Derek would enjoy some company. He doesn't get to see any friends outside of the hospital very often." She suggested. Maybe some company would be good for them.

"That sounds good, just tell him to give me a call and we will get it planned. Good to see you, gotta run." He said with a friendly smile as he turned the corner.

it's been awhile

since i said i'm sorry

It's been awhile

Since I've seen the way the candles light your face

It's been awhile

But I can still remember just the way you taste

Derek stood outside of the daycare window staring at his baby daughter. He had some time later on in the day and Meredith was in surgery so he wanted to just catch a glimpse of Delia to get him by. His family was like his air. He missed Meredith already, and it was only her first day back to work. Even though they had grown so much in such a little time, he was still worried about how things would go between Meredith and him.

He walked in the door and picked up Delia and held her close. He thought back on his life and all of the mistakes he had made. It was time for him to say he was truley sorry to Meredith. He had a plan. His mind started to work on a plan, only to be interupted by his pager.

"Uhhhhh" Derek groaned at the 911 flashing across the screen. He handed Delia back over to the Teacher and headed for the stairwell at a run.

It's been a while

Since I could hold my head up high

and it's been a while since i said i'm sorry