AUTHOR'S NOTE (December 22, 2013) - I couldn't remember/find the name of the older servant that works at the Sohma estate (the one that we see most often in the series), so I'm calling her "Mizuki" in this story. If you know her name, let me know and I'll correct it immediately. Thanks :)

Warning! Angst and hot stuff in this chapter!

Kami no Kodomo
Child of God

Chapter 1
Birthday Present

Akito looked up into the night sky, to the twinkling stars above, and the third full moon to pass overhead since her last period. The cherry blossoms had all but vanished in the weeks to pass since she slept with Shigure—a reminder that all good things came to a bitter and cruel end.

For it was in the following weeks since that encounter, that he had grown cold and distant again. It was a reminder to her that love was, indeed, a fleeting emotion.

Her eyes brimmed with tears.

Her sixteenth birthday was tomorrow.

And she might be pregnant.

She would call Hatori. She knew that pregnancy was just a possibility. Nothing was certain. Yet.

But as she stared up into the night sky, unable to sleep, she knew, within her soul, that something was different.

A tear trickled down her cheek, shimmering in the moonlight that cascaded over her through the window.

She wanted him to love her. Was she that unlovable that even the dog turned his nose up at her after he shared her bed?

She wrapped her arms around her body and held herself tight.

She thought she could trust him. She liked him.

And now, she couldn't be sure.

…

Hatori paced back and forth outside her private bathroom. The pregnancy test was sitting on the porcelain counter next to her. She was sitting on the closed toilet lid with her knees drawn up and held tightly against her chest.

"It is time yet?" she asked him in a soft voice.

He stopped outside the open bathroom door and glanced at his watch. He heaved a sigh. "Close enough."

She released her knees and put her feet on the cool tile floor. She leaned toward the pregnancy test as Hatori stepped into the bathroom and lifted the test up at eye level before him. He closed his eyes and she watched as he drew his eyebrows together.

"I am going to kill him," he muttered slowly.

Akito's eyes widened as she jumped up from her seat and snatched the test strip from his hands. She studied it and glanced at the box it had come out of.

Positive.

Bile shot up her throat like a bad case of heartburn. She tried to swallow it down, unable to tear her eyes away from the test result.

Hatori leaned against the doorframe in stern, contemplative silence. No one spoke. He waited for her to say something, and when she didn't, he cleared his throat. She broke free of her spell and stared up at him with large eyes. "What should I do?" she asked in a small voice.

"When was the last time you had your menstrual cycle?" he asked calmly.

She scrunched her nose up at his formal reference, but answered, "About 12 weeks ago… I think."

He shook his head in disbelief. "Didn't you think it was odd when you first missed your menses?"

She looked down, but the truth was that her monthly cycle had always been incredibly irregular and unpredictable, so she never really kept track of it. She'd been moping around, silently fuming at Shigure's sudden indifference in her, that she never noticed the absence of her menses. Would he change if she told him she was pregnant with his child? Would he commit to her then? She had her doubts given the way he had been treating her as of late. The liar used her. That's all she was to him.

She clenched her eyes shut and exhaled sharply. "What should I do?" she repeated, more forcefully this time.

He rubbed his temple. "It may be too late now for an abortion," he mumbled.

"An abortion…" She chewed on the thought as she sat back down on the toilet.

Normally Hatori would be against abortions, but he worried about what was best for Akito. She was still much too young and had a lot of responsibilities to take care of in her not too distant future—not to mention that the majority of the Juunishi and the Sohma family believed her to be a male. Only he, Shigure, Ayame, and Kureno knew of her true gender. It was only a matter of time before the truth of her pregnancy would become very clear and obvious to anyone.

And then what would happen?

"Give me the abortion," she said suddenly.

He stared at her in alarm. She was sitting, hunched over on the toilet, staring at her hands. She looked so small and fragile. Indeed, she might be too weak to carry a child to term and then to give birth to the child. She could die…

But abortions were also risky to her health.

He would have to think about it.

When he didn't immediately agree, she got to her feet, her hands balled into tight fists. "I said give me the abortion!" she screamed.

He lowered his eyes and nodded slightly.

She stormed past him; her face hot, and the sting of bitter tears prickled her eyes.

This was all her fault. She let him have his way with her when she should have resisted, and now she had to take care of the consequences before anyone else could discover the truth. She couldn't let anyone know about this. No one, not even her own mother.

She went to the window on the other side of the room and peered outside. The morning sun was nearing the highest point in the sky and a few wisps of clouds tangled around it. The Juunishi members should be gathering in the main house soon in celebration of her sixteenth birthday, but she didn't feel like seeing anyone. With this news about her pregnancy, she just wanted to avoid them all—especially that dog.

"Do you need anything else, Akito-san?" Hatori asked from the doorway of the bathroom.

She turned only to give him an intense look as she murmured, "Not a word about this to anyone. Especially him."

He nodded before she waved him off.

"I'll see you at the luncheon."

She heard him leave and she could feel her anger begin to boil.

She was alone for all of ten minutes when one of the house servants entered to get her ready for the luncheon. It was a minute too long of her anger silently simmering within. She whirled at the young servant and barked, "Go away!"

"Ah, hai!" she replied fearfully. She quickly left.

But Akito found herself feeling even more infuriated. She grabbed the nearest object, which happened to be a small lamp, and threw it against the wall near the door, just as Mizuki entered, the oldest servant to serve the Sohma family.

Mizuki was tough as nails and didn't even flinch as the lamp smashed against the wall. Her eyes met Akito's. "Are you quite finished now?"

"Get out!" Akito screamed at her.

"Really, as the head of the Sohma family, is that anyway to treat your elders?"

"Get out!"

"Sounds like someone needs a lesson in manners."

Akito took a step back, but her glare never faltered. Mizuki was unfazed. "I'm not going out there," Akito declared. She didn't want to face them. Any of them. Her birthday luncheon was over as far as she was concerned.

"Everyone is here, Akito-sama. You wouldn't want to disappointment them now, would you?"

Akito saw her step toward the bathroom—where the test was still sitting. Her heart jumped at the realization. Hatori didn't take it with him?

Her attention diverted, she shouted, "Fine!" to the servant in hopes of her stopping her approach to the dreaded bathroom. "Get me a clean yukata! I won't go out there unless I'm properly dressed!"

Satisfied that she had accomplished her goal, Mizuki bowed slightly and left.

As soon as she was gone, Akito quickly ran into the bathroom and snatched the test and tucked it into her obi. Almost immediately, she decided that was a bad idea because Mizuki would come back and help her dress. Determined not to let anyone find the test, she hurried to her dresser and stuffed it under her underwear, just as Mizuki returned.

"Get out!" Akito ordered. "Don't you know how to knock? I'll call you in in a minute!" She wanted to make it look like Mizuki caught her trying to change her underwear—something she always demanded privacy for. The previous God figures may have asked for assistance in changing all of their clothes, but undergarments were not one of them for Akito. She quickly changed her underwear and grabbed one of the many pieces of gauze that she used to wrap around her chest since her breasts started growing. She only did it when she was expecting guests. Otherwise, she didn't worry about it because the traditional clothes did a good enough job of concealing her assets. She quickly took off her light under robe and bound her chest with the gauze before slipping her robe back on and permitting Mizuki to enter again.

The woman seemed satisfied that Akito had calmed down and was cooperating now. She had no idea that it was because Akito was trying to hide something from her. She helped Akito into a royal blue yukata with silver trim and silver designs embroidered throughout before escorting her out of her room to the main house.

Just as Mizuki said, everyone was there, even little Kisa and Hiro, who were playing with plushies in front right corner with Momiji. Kyo was sulking in the left corner just next to the door Akito stepped through. Yuki, Haru and Rin were in the front left corner. The older cousins were sitting together in the middle of the room on cushions, chatting, while they waited for Akito to arrive.

They stared up at her when she entered. She swallowed, feeling panic begin to rise up from her belly. Would they know? Could they tell? She looked into each and every one of their faces and knew that she was panicking for nothing. Fear resonated from their expressions on the younger cousins as she looked down upon them.

"Happy birthday, Akito-san."

Why did it have to be the dog to greet her first?

Perhaps because he wasn't afraid of her like the others?

But she had never wanted him to be afraid of her.

Maybe she needed to change that. Remind him of his place, and hers above him.

Later. After she had taken care of the thing growing inside her.

The parasite had to be removed. Then she would deal with Shigure.

The gathering proved to be a quiet ordeal. No one really talking. No one really eating for that matter. They picked at the food placed before them and sipped at their tea, but no one was really indulging themselves in anything.

The luncheon was a bust. Of course it would be with her there. No one wanted to be near God. It had been Shigure's idea in the first place.

When it was over, Akito was glad to be alone in her room again.

But I'm not truly alone right now, am I? she thought to herself, loosening her yukata's obi around her waist. She touched her stomach with the palm of her hand, but felt nothing. No movement. No fluttering. She hadn't even felt nauseous in the weeks that had passed. Nothing to trigger any thought of the possibility of her even being pregnant. Other than missing her period a few times, but who wouldn't if a girl's period was consistently irregular in the first place? There was still no physical indication of a baby growing within her. Her belly still looked smooth, but it was a different sort of firmness she felt underneath than what she was used to feeling. She'd be showing soon, she knew. In a few more weeks, it would be as clear as day that she was pregnant.

She couldn't let it get that far.

She sighed. Another birthday come and gone, she thought as she went to the window and stared out it. The clouds had gotten thicker and perhaps it might rain before night fell.

A gentle rapping at the door made her turn.

"May I come in, Akito-san?"

She didn't want to hear his voice, or see his head peer around the door.

Her heart jumped in her throat. She didn't know whether she should be angry at him or seek comfort in his arms. She didn't even know if she should tell him that she was pregnant with his child.

No, no of course she shouldn't tell him that. He might try to convince her to keep it. And then what?

He stepped in and she turned her back to him. She wrapped her arms around herself and clamped her eyes shut.

The ache in her heart gripped her so hard. Her chest felt tight, even more so with the bindings that concealed her womanhood. She could feel her eyes beginning to moisten. Why? Why did he have this affect on her? She hated it. She felt so weak.

"What's wrong Akito-san?" he asked.

She could hear his footsteps softly touch the floorboards as he approached her.

"Go away," she managed to mumble. Just go away and leave me alone!

"But Akito-san, I haven't given you my gift yet."

She felt his hand touch her shoulder and her knees buckled underneath her. He caught her by wrapping her in his arms, cradling her back against his chest. He nuzzled her neck affectionately. He whispered into her ear, "I miss moments like these, when we can be alone."

Her face grew hot and her breathing became haggard because of her bound chest. She needed more air and her lungs were incapable of expanding enough to meet her demands.

He could tell that she was struggling to breathe, so he reached into the opening of her yukata around her neck to the white robe underneath and began to untie it.

"Shigure," she croaked out as his hand stroked her despite the cloth between them. She could feel him tugging away at the material and she pulled away, only to completely undo the tie. The white robe fell open just enough to expose her bound chest.

I knew it. She could almost hear his thoughts as his eyes took in the bindings of the soft material against her chest. His hand reached for it, brushing against her pale skin just above her lowest rib bone.

"Don't," she pleaded, shielding herself with her arms. Her voice was so quiet, so frail sounding. She trembled under his touch as he grabbed both of her wrists and held them in one hand while reaching in with the other to loosen the cloth.

"I want you," he whispered, leaning in close, his breath hot against her ear, "to breathe freely."

He unhooked the pin that held the bindings together and she felt them slowly begin to loosen and unravel around her.

She found her strength and pulled away from him, tugging the yukata tightly around her. "Don't touch me," she sobbed. She clutched tightly to the silk, feeling her vulnerability unravel and slip out from under her.

"Don't you feel better now, Akito-san?" he asked.

She refused to answer. She didn't want to give him that satisfaction.

That didn't prevent him from reaching for the gift he brought her. He had set it down in the doorway when he entered. He brought it to her, wrapped in gold and silver paper. He presented it to her and waited, wordlessly, for her to accept it.

She didn't want to, but she couldn't say no to him with those big puppy dog eyes. He knew just how to get under her skin.

"May I?" he asked, seeing her still clinging to the yukata.

She could tell that he was excited to show her the gift he bought. He could barely contain himself. He offered to open it for her. She nodded and watched his hands gently pull away the silver and gold paper. A thin rectangular box was under the decorative paper and he opened it and pulled away the tissue paper inside. Akito's eyes widened when she saw him hold up a beautiful pink and white kimono with sakura blossoms decorating it with gold threading.

It was too beautiful for her. Too light and pure for a wretched person like her. What had he been thinking? She could never wear it. It would reveal her to be a woman, something she had concealed for much of her life, and would continue to hide until her dying days.

"Shigure," she whispered with a hint of conflict and sadness in her voice, "I can't wear this."

"Maa, maa," he replied, "I know what you are thinking, but this is for me."

She stared at him as he moved around her and gently pulled the yukata from her shoulders. He brushed his lips against her ear, causing her to shiver.

"I want to be the only one to see you in this," he murmured huskily.

She trembled as the yukata fell to the floor and he slipped the beautiful kimono on. She looked up into his eyes as he came around to straighten it on her slender frame. But when her eyes met his, she saw his desire, and it flooded over her like a tidal wave.

He reached inside to her white under robe, still loose underneath, and pulled her to him. His hands were hot against her cool, smooth skin and it left a burning sensation that spread throughout her, wherever he touched her. She gasped when his fingers grazed her sensitive breasts. She could feel his arousal and despite the screaming of her mind to push him away, she could feel herself yearning for more. More of him. Like last time.

He lowered his head to kiss her and she met him halfway. Wanting him. Desiring him. Needing him.

One last chance, she vowed. This was his last chance to prove his love to her.

She prayed that this time would be different. This time, he would stay true.

He had to.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I seriously did not intend to have another spicy scene, but that's how it came out. *fans herself* Hope you enjoyed this chapter! From now on, things get angsty. Really angsty in the next chapter…