AUTHOR'S NOTE: As we will see in this chapter, with the passage of time and Akito's pregnancy underway, she not only withdraws into herself, but she withdraws from the telling of the story as well, lol. It becomes more Hatori-centred in the next couple of chapters.

Kami no Kodomo
Child of God

Chapter 3
Hanging by a Thread

It wasn't long before rumours began to spread among the servants about Akito sleeping with Kureno. Kureno assured Hatori, Ren and Mizuki that nothing happened between them—only that he kept her from hurting herself. He expressed his concern about her perhaps attempting to harm herself again and that maybe he should stay by her side to prevent it. The two women didn't approve, but Hatori, being the level-headed one of the group, concurred with Kureno. He knew Kureno had no shameful, indecent thoughts regarding Akito, and that Kureno's selflessness might be just the ticket Akito needed to get through this pregnancy.

"Fine, whatever," Ren snapped, her arms crossed in front of her chest. "But when she starts really showing, we need to conceal her from everyone."

They agreed, but Hatori feared to what extreme must they conceal her?

In the weeks to pass, and Akito's pregnancy became increasingly obvious, he found his answer.

"The cat's cage is unoccupied," Mizuki stated simply. "No one goes there and no one would see her there. I'll bring her her meals and the rest is between us. No one will know."

Ren liked the idea. But Ren was also looking for ways to punish her daughter for her actions any way she could.

Kureno and Hatori disagreed, calling the idea inhumane and cruel.

"She's pregnant, and should be comfortable," Hatori said. "The cat's cage is cold and isolated—in no way designed to accommodate a pregnant woman."

"Do you have a better idea?" Ren jeered.

So it was decided. God would live in the cat's cage until the child was born.

At first, Akito put up a struggle, but in the days to pass, her mood swings swung into the dark and dreary realms. Her hormonal fluctuations and isolation made her depressed and all the more spiteful with her words, since her physical state was exhausted.

Her sleeping schedule was in disarray, and because she was locked up with no objects with which she could harm herself, they saw no need for Kureno to remain by her side at night. He tried at first, but she was so angry to be forced to live in the cat's cage that she chased him away, throwing hateful words in his face about abandonment.

She spent many nights staring up at the stars that twinkled between the branches on the tree that concealed the shack from the rest of the houses on the estate. She watched as the leaves turned from green to yellow to red and fell to the ground as the autumn rain pelted down.

She wished the parasite would die within her. She ate very little. She was consistently dehydrated and exhausted.

Her mother didn't visit her. Kureno came a few times, but she always chased him away with her hateful words. Hatori came to check up on her almost daily. He noted her sunken cheeks, the bags under her eyes, her hips protruding out on both sides of her rather small, but growing, stomach.

"Akito-san," he told her calmly, with a hint of warning, "if you don't take better care of yourself now, you might permanently damage your health for the rest of your life."

She ignored him. "Take the parasite out and I'll eat."

He hated to see her doing this to herself and the child she carried. He knew that she and Shigure had been reckless, but why torment yourself when this should be a blissful and happy time in a woman's life? Why risk the life of a perfectly innocent and harmless child that had no reason to suffer?

He feared for the child, both now and in the future. If Akito gave birth to a child and the child survived, what would they do with the child? Who would raise it? No one wanted to discuss this matter and Akito was getting closer and closer to her due date in the New Year.

As much as his thoughts were plagued by Akito and her encroaching due date, he still had exams to write. He had his own life to attend to and he could not put it on hold to worry about Akito's wellbeing.

He also struggled to keep this secret from his best friend, Shigure, who at first had been quizzical about Akito's whereabouts and lack of visitation permits. Why had she not requested a visit from him?

Mizuki made a lewd comment, while serving Shigure and Hatori tea one warm September afternoon, suggesting that Shigure and Akito's intimate relationship end and that Ren would not permit such visits to take place between Akito and Shigure until Akito was older.

The suggestion arched Shigure's eyebrow in question at Hatori, but Hatori just cleared his throat and drank his tea.

But Shigure had backed off then. And Hatori was grateful for that, as it was one less thing for him to worry about.

And so Akito remained alone with just her tainted thoughts rotting her mind, as she watched the world fly by outside the cat's cage.

Secretly, she had hoped Shigure would come looking for her and tell her everything would be okay, and he would hold her and stroke her hair. However, as the days turned to weeks, and weeks into months, her daydreaming turned sour. She starting thinking about all the nasty things she would say to Shigure if he ever showed his face.

He deserves it. He did this to me. He made me weak. I'll make him pay. I'll make them all pay for doing this to me. I'm God! How dare they?

And this parasite inside me… It'll pay too. This shouldn't have happened to me. It shouldn't exist!

I'll make it disappear. I'll make it wish it had never been born!

She stewed in her anger, delirious to what was going on around her and falling deeper and deeper into a sea of darkness, allowing the monsters in the shadows to swallow her heart and soul.

Mizuki found her unconscious and barely breathing one day in early October. She immediately called Hatori. He left in the middle of one of his medical exams and hurried home to check on her.

Akito was starved of nutrients because of her refusal to eat. He knew that she had been refusing food, and now it had taken its toll on her. He ordered Mizuki to bring him vitamins—every vitamin bottle that she could find in the house—water, and fresh miso soup.

Mizuki hurried into the main house as Hatori held Akito's fragile body to him. She felt cold in his arms. He reached for her blankets and wrapped them around his shoulders as he cradled her like a child.

"Akito, can you hear me?" he asked calmly, although on the inside he was trembling with fear. He prayed that it wasn't too late. He prayed that he could correct it without Akito knowing. She seemed bent on self-destruction, and he couldn't allow that to happen. He had to get the nutrients she needed without her being aware of it. Right now, he didn't have anything strong enough or effective enough, but he prayed that whatever Mizuki could find would be enough for now.

She didn't stir, but he noted her eyelids flutter a little at the sound of his voice.

"That's right," he told her. "It's me, Hatori. Stay with me now. Listen to my voice. Listen to me."

He brushed her hair from her face and whispered into her ear. "You have to stop this. You have to stop starving yourself. Don't worry about the baby, worry about yourself. You won't survive if you keep this up. You can't kill yourself in order to kill the baby. You can't. You won't because I won't let you. I won't let you do that. Do you hear me?"

Mizuki returned then with water, miso soup and an assortment of pills and capsules of all sizes and various colours from white to yellow to orange to green and black. He asked for a mortar and pestle and a syringe.

"A syringe? Where am I going to get one of those?" she declared in bewilderment.

"A bottle, a sippy-cup, a straw—whatever! She can't drink from a glass!" he demanded, more forcefully than was his usual tone.

She went off in search of the objects and, with Akito lying on his lap, Hatori reached for the capsules. He squeezed and twisted the outer shell and spilled the contents into the water. When all that was left were a couple of tablets, Mizuki returned. He quickly grinded up the tablets and added them to the water. All she could find was a straw, so he stirred the vitamin-water to blend it. He covered the top end of the straw with his thumb, while the bottom end was still in the water, thus trapping some of the liquid in the straw. He lifted the straw to Akito's lips and let it dribble down her throat.

She swallowed reflexively. Survival instincts kicking in now, her body responded to what it needed while her mind was still locked in darkness.

He kept dribbling water down her throat until it was nearly gone. Her eyebrows were drawing together as she starting returning to a semi-conscious level. No doubt the vitamins made the water taste awful, but she needed both. He switched to the miso soup then, which was now lukewarm, and repeated the procedure with the straw there, bringing broth to her lips and letting gravity run its course. Her forehead smoothed then as the pleasant flavour ran over her tongue. A peaceful look enveloped her facial features as the colour in her cheeks slowly returned and the soup slowly disappeared from the bowl.

Hatori collapsed then, holding her to him as the worst had passed, and allowed himself to cry softly into her hair. His conviction to be a doctor grew tenfold then. He vowed to always look after Akito's health, no matter how hateful her words were, no matter how severe her actions were—she needed him, and he needed her.

"I promise," he whispered to her sleeping face. "No matter what happens. Please…"

Please, just survive!

…

Kureno and Hatori took turns with Akito then. Both of them were still in school, Hatori with just a couple of years left of medical school, and Kureno with just another year and a half left of university. Whenever they weren't in class (or Hatori working on his case studies in the hospital), they would spend their waking moments with Akito. In her weakened, malnourished state, all she did was sleep now, which allowed them plenty of quiet time for studying. She was too exhausted to argue or struggle anymore. She just slept, and when she wasn't sleeping, she was being force-fed various soups, horrible tasting "health drinks" and lots of water. In her moments of wakefulness, she stared off into space, never engaging in conversation or moving.

Kureno resumed his position by her side at night, but she never snuggled close with him again. She had given up the struggle and now was just letting time run its course. She was still angry at them for putting her in the cat's cage, and thus refused to talk to any of them, but silence was better than her verbal lashings.

November came and passed and Akito's stomach grew larger and larger. Soon it was the Christmas season and everyone was in festive spirits on the estate. The younger Sohma cousins were excited as the first snow fell on Christmas Eve and Shigure, Ayame and Hatori got together for a little drink at the bar.

Hatori's last exam before the holidays had been the evening before and Shigure insisted that they go out for drinks to celebrate.

"We haven't spent any time with you in the last couple of months because you've been studying so hard, Haa-san," Shigure said animatedly. There was a hint of slur in his speech, as he had had a few drinks. "Why, Aya and I have had to come up with our own devices to entertain ourselves!"

No thanks to you, Hatori thought to himself bitterly. If it hadn't been for Shigure's recklessness, he might have had a little more free time to enjoy himself instead of working on his studies and caring for Akito from sunrise to sunset.

"Tori-san will make an excellent doctor! So smart and dedicated, he is. And most kind!" Ayame gushed enthusiastically, raising his bright red cocktail into the air. "And most deserving of our Christmas present!"

"Christmas present?" He hadn't thought about Christmas presents at all. They didn't normally exchange gifts, but rather went out and did things together. Last year they went skiing in Gunma, the year before a theatrical performance, the year before that, a traditional Japanese tea ceremony, and the years before that since the start of high school they went to one of the Sohma cottages. Come to think of it, he'd been so busy, they hadn't even discussed what they were going to do this year. He'd been so wrapped up in his studies and in Akito's health that he forgot all about Christmas. Akito's due date was January 20th—he just wanted her to make it to the New Year. He worried that if the child was born early, it would be premature because of the lack of care her mother gave herself. The closer to the due date, the better.

But he could share none of his worries with his friends—especially the father of the child because Akito forbade him from telling even him. Nor was it his place to do so. Akito should tell him. But the future of the child still remained uncertain, so even he wasn't sure if or when Akito would tell Shigure.

Hatori looked away from their gazes and to the floor beneath him. Whatever gift they had given him, he felt undeserving of because of the deep, dark secret he harboured inside. Guilt washed over him. And pity. The fact that his friends had been thinking about him further added to his inability to look at them because he had been so consumed with his own personal life that he didn't have time to even call them.

He felt a distance between them that he hadn't felt before, and it worried him. He didn't like it. Secrets were terrible things to keep from best friends.

Shigure whipped out something from his robe and held it out to Hatori. "Merry Christmas, Haa-san," he said with Ayame chiming in.

Hatori reluctantly took the envelope (decorated with Christmas trees, holly and jingle bells) and pulled out the contents. It was a paid 4-nights stay at a luxury hot springs and spa in Ibaraki. He stared at it with wide eyes—dated January 3, just days after New Years and right before his classes started up again.

He swallowed. What if Akito went into labour then? He couldn't leave her. He promised to stay close by until she gave birth. But he couldn't tell Shigure and Ayame either.

Ayame began to babble about the trip, describing all the things the onsen had to offer, what the three of them would do there, massages, facials—he kept listing them off, but Hatori wasn't even listening. All he could think about was how he needed to be there for Akito and how he would break it to them that he couldn't go with them.

Just then his cell phone began to ring. From the main house.

His eyes widened. Akito?

He flipped his phone open and held it to his ears. "Yes?"

It was Mizuki. "Kureno called me at once," she stated blatantly.

"Akito's gone into labour."

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Oh man! Here it comes! Ren didn't even have the decency to call him! Hahaha! The struggles Hatori and Kureno faced in this chapter and the previous one help to underline the original Fruits Basket story too and their dedication to Akito. It's all carefully planned…