Part 1
I opened my eyes and saw the eyes of my owner looking at me. Phineas smiled.
"Morning Perry!" He chimed. He petted my head. "Did our favorite platypus in the whole wide world get a good sleep?" I yawned and stretched. Uh-huh I sure did, Phineas. Phineas went off his bed and got ready for the day. Ferb came by my side and petted me.
"We're sure going to miss you when we're in school." Phineas spoke.
"We'll be back." Ferb said to his stepbrother.
"Yeah." Phineas said. "But it'll be nine hours, and then we have soccer practice today. He'll be all by his lonesome for eleven whole hours."
"Don't forget we have Baljeet's Math-O-Thon to go to." Phineas did a face palm.
"Oh yeah! How could I forget?" He then looked at me. "Gosh, we won't be home until late. And we'll have to go to bed early for school tomorrow, not to mention do our homework that we might get." He looked at me and looked sad. He looked at his stepbrother again, sighing. "I hate doing this, Ferb. I hate leaving him here all by his lonesome. Do you know what I mean?" Ferb nodded.
You see, although I had all of my training done and could be an agent out there fighting crime, I decided to wait a few years before I started. I wanted to be a pet for a while, living with my host family, doing what regular pets do. Huge mistake! As the years went on; I found it pretty boring. With my owners and their sister at school and the father at work, and whenever Linda's away, I literally have nothing to do. I do find suitable shows to watch on TV sometimes and play with Pinky when he's available, but that's about it. Life as a pet can be very dull in my opinion. Sometimes, I could literally die with boredom.
There was a knock on the boys' door. We looked and their mom popped her head in.
"Breakfast is on the table boys." Linda announced.
"We'll be right down, Mom." Phineas told her. Their mom then left. Phineas picked me up. "Well come on, Ferb. Let's quick eat our breakfast and play with Perry in the little time we have left." We went out of the room and down the stairs.
"Go to your breakfast, Perry." Phineas told me when he put me down in the kitchen. I strolled to my food bowls and ate my morning worms.
"Mom?" Phineas asked his mom. "Does Perry miss us when we're in school?"
"I imagine so." His mother answered. "But Candace will be here at two and your father and I will take care of him until your father goes to work."."
"I have to go to work early." Lawrence said. "I have two shifts, remember? I have to fill in for Mike."
"Oh yeah, well I'll be here then."
"Don't you have your 'Intro to Foods' thing today, mom?" Phineas asked his mother.
"Oh yeah." Linda remembered. "But that'll only be a couple hours. I'll be home at noon."
Now, don't get me wrong. I love Linda as well as her husband and even
Candace is okay, but they're not the same as my owners. Phineas looked at his cereal.
"It's not fair. I hate leaving him alone all the time."
"I hate it too dear. But we don't have a choice. He can't go with us."
"Can't you bring him at the end of practice?" Linda shook her head.
"I'm afraid not. It's your and Ferb's last practice before the championships and I don't want him to distract you. Plus, we have to leave for Baljeet's Math-O-Thon right after practice." Phineas frowned.
"Okay." He then continued eating.
"Look on the bright side, school's ending soon so you can spend as much time as you want with him. At least we don't have to keep him in his kennel all day."
It was true. When I first got here, I had to be locked in a cage when my family was out. I felt bad for regular house pets that have to be kept in their kennels for hours on end. I would be miserable too, even with my favorite rubber ducky, Mr. Squeaks by my side, my other toys, and my food bowls. But unlike them I am now an agent. We have been taught how to unlock our cages. Whenever my family go out for the day, I unlocked my cage with what I learned in my training and when I'm out I roam the house. And when they come back, I go back in my cage and lock it back up so they don't get suspicious.
One time I forgot to lock my door when I heard them come home and Candace got yelled at because of it. I felt bad for her, but I couldn't help it to find it a teensy bit humorous.
But that was before they learned more about platypuses. Since then, they trust me that I won't break anything because apparently those so- called 'platypus experts' say that we platypuses 'don't do much.' Ha! Who are they to say that we don't do much? We platypuses are more capable then we get credit for when we set our minds to it. So, when you readers hear that 'platypuses don't do much', they'll wrong! I think that humans don't get us because they don't know enough about us. So who's to say they can say 'platypuses don't do much', if they don't know much about us? Oh no, I'm rambling, aren't I? Well, I'll stop now. Just remember who told you that we platypuses do so much more then 'don't do much.'
When my owners got done with their cereals and put them away, they bent down to me. Phineas looked at the clock. He looked at me.
"Okay Perry, we have ten minutes to play." He stood up. "I'll go get your rope." He went to fetch it.
Phineas and Ferb took turns playing Tug-of- War with me for a full ten minutes. Phineas petted me.
"Okay," He said to me. "That's all for now. We don't want to be late." He stood up and hugged me. Ferb did the same. They then hugged their parents and got their backpacks. They were about to go when Phineas looked at me.
"Can Perry walk us to the school bus, Mom?" He asked her.
"Sure." Linda answered. "I think that's a lovely idea." Phineas looked at me.
"Okay, come on Perry." I strolled after them.
We had just about made it when the bus rolled up. Phineas bent down and hugged me again.
"Bye Perry!" He said and went on the bus, along with Ferb and the other children. I saw Phineas waving at me from his window.
I was about to go home when something caught my eye. There on the ground was a brown paper bag. Where did it come from? Was the bag there before? I didn't think so. I went up to the bag to better observe it. I smelled the food. I looked at the writing on it and my eyes widened. It read 'Phineas Flynn-Fletcher's lunch'. He must have dropped it going on the bus.
I then put it in my mouth and ran for the bus before it turned the corner and hopped on the back.
My watch then beeped. I grabbed the bag in my hand and leapt to my two feet. I looked down at my watch and turned it on. My boss appeared on the tiny screen.
"Agent P," He began. "The time's come. Come to headquarters ASAP." The watch went blank. I did a face palm. I was supposed to be getting a nemesis today. My time of boredom can finally be over. How could I forget? I turned off the watch and looked at the bag.
I'll have to be a little late. I didn't want Phineas to starve. The Major will understand and hopefully my nemesis won't cause too much trouble before I get there.
When the bus stopped, I hopped off the back and ran to my owners and their friends. Phineas saw me.
"Oh, there you are Perry." He then realized something. "Perry? What are you doing here? As much as I'll enjoy you being here with me, I'm afraid you can't. The school has a strict 'no pets' policy. So, I'm afraid you'll have to go home."
"Hey Phineas," Isabella said to him. "What's that in his mouth?" Phineas looked at it.
"It looks like a brown paper bag." He looked at his stepbrother. "Did you forget your lunch, Ferb?" Ferb shook his head and showed us his lunch bag.
"No." He replied. "I have mine right here." My redheaded owner's eyes grew huge.
"You mean I forgot?" He grabbed the bag from my mouth, reading his name on it. "Yep!" He stood up. "I must've dropped it while getting on the bus and Perry came to give it to me." He petted me. "Thanks Perry. But you know I could've just ordered hot lunch." The bells then rang and kids went into the building.
"Well, we better go." Phineas said and he hugged me. "You go on home now. Ferb and I will be home after our soccer practice and Baljeet's Math-o-Thon."
"I can't believe you're going." Baljeet said to Buford. "You don't like math."
"I'll be there when you mess up." Buford answered.
"How do you know that I'll mess up?"
"I don't. But I'll be there when you do mess up." With that, the kids went into the school building.
I ran all the way back to the Flynn-Fletchers. I was about to go in my secret hideout in agent mode from the tree when Linda's voice spoke. I quickly took off my fedora and went into mindless pet form.
"Oh there you are, Perry." She said, walking up to me. "Where did you run off to? I was about to call the pound." I just chattered. "Oh never mind. I'll be leaving in an hour for my class. I'll leave the sliding door open for you." She then walked back into the house.
When Linda was gone, I put on my fedora again and went into my tree hideout.
Once there, I went to the chair, sat in it, and turned on the monitor. Monogram appeared, but he wasn't looking at me.
"Carl?" He asked. "Did you send the search party for Agent P yet?" Carl then appeared on screen.
"No." He told him. "But I'm about to."
"Good, Agent P is taking too long." I chattered to tell them that I was here. Monogram and Carl noticed me.
"Agent P." Monogram said. "Good you're here. Carl was so worried that he's about to put out search parties to look for you. I told him, 'no, you don't have to do this. Agent P will show up.' But Carl refused to listen to me."
"No I didn't, sir." Carl said to him. "I mean, sure I was worried, but I asked you if you wanted to send out the search parties and you said yes." Monogram glared at him.
"Don't make me fire you, Carl. Go and call off the search parties."
"Yes sir." And with that, he strolled off screen. Monogram looked at me again.
"Agent P, you're late." I looked down in shame. Oh no! I'm not going to get fired on my first day, am I? I heard something printing out of the printer. "Printing out is a map of where your nemesis, Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz's apartment is located and his picture. He may not be there when you get there because he's getting his picture taken at the photo store downtown, so you might have to wait." I took out the sheet from the printer and examined it. It was a map to a place named D.I.E. I gulped and felt a shiver go up my spine. Wow, what a creepy name for a building, but I guess that's why he's my nemesis. His picture was paper-clipped by his name. Also there was my O.W.C.A card.
"Your hover car and jet pack are all ready for you. Show that card to your nemesis before fighting him. Monogram, over and out!" I looked at the screen and saluted before the screen went blank.
I then hopped into my hover car and strapped myself in. I started the ignition and flew out of my lair, and flew off to my destination.
I flew everywhere and I didn't find my nemesis' apartment. All I can find is D.E.I. I checked the map again to make sure I didn't miss anything. Nope, just as I thought, D.I.E, not D.E.I. I looked around again. Where is it?
After the third time of circling around the same area with no such luck, I decided to give up, when I saw a man in a lab coat. I looked at the picture again. Hmmm, it could be him. He has the same slouch as the man in the picture. To make sure, I flew down to him.
I followed him for a few blocks. What are you doing, Perry? I asked myself. You're following someone that may or may not be your nemesis. If this guy turns out not to be him, this will be a complete waste of time, not to mention you'll only make a fool out of yourself. I was about to go back to HQ when I saw him heading in a photo store. Aha! Major Monogram said that my nemesis was heading to a photo store. This could be him! I decided to wait around here for a bit. I flew down and parked my hover car in some nearby bushes so nobody would see it there. After I locked it, I went over to hide behind a nearby mailbox and waited.
I waited for what seemed forever. I saw people come out, but not the person I was waiting for. I looked at my watch to see the time. It was noon. I had waited a whole hour here, but it seemed longer to me. I looked out again, where was the person that I saw enter? I didn't miss this person, have I?
I was about to go when I saw my possible nemesis.
I then saw the person stop. What was this person doing? I then ducked behind as he looked behind, straight towards me. Did he see me? I don't think so. I gave a sigh of relief. I peeked out to see if this was the guy I was looking for. I looked at the picture to compare it to the person I was seeking. It was Dr. Doofenshmirtz all right. I quickly hid behind the mailbox again. I peeked out again, and didn't see him. Where did he go? A voice then spoke above me.
"Aha! I knew someone was following me!" I panicked and looked up. It was him. I smiled weakly, stood up and looked at him.
"Why were you following me?" He wanted to know. "Little… well I don't know what you are. A beaver? A duck? And what's a fedora doing on your head? That doesn't make sense." He then pondered about this. "Weird." He then patted my head. "Well, I better be on my way, little fella." I glared at him. Who says he can pat my head? He then left. "Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz is out, peace!" I ran in front of him before he could go any further. He stopped and looked at me.
"You again?" He asked. "Look, I must get going, so shoo, be gone!" I ran in front of him again and showed him my badge. His jaw dropped.
"Where did you get that badge that says 'spy' on it? Did you steal it?" He then gasped. "You did steal it didn't you? The badge's owner must be worried sick and frantically trying to find it." He patted my head again. "Good for you. Anyone or any animal who steals is a friend of mine." I glared at him. Again with the patting? What is this guy's problem?
"Well, adios!" He was about to leave again when I dragged him by the hand. He screamed. "Hey! Where are you taking me?"
I led him to the bushes and showed him my hover car. He looked at it. "You stole that too? Man, you are good, good at being bad that is. Although why an animal would want a hover car, I have no idea." I did a face palm. Unbelievable! I'm an anthromophic platypus with a fedora, a spy badge, and a hover car. Does he want me to spell it out for him? He then got an idea.
"I have an idea!" He took me in his hands. I struggled in his grasp. What was he doing with me? "I'll take you home with me and together we can be partners in crime, what do you say?" He hugged me until I was almost out of breath. "I can almost see it now, you and me robbing banks together, illegally downloading internet videos, me showing you how to TP houses, playing Ding-Dong Ditch to people, doing prank calls, oh you can't talk, so it'll just be me, us smashing pumpkins on Halloween so nobody will have any jack-or-lanterns, and all sorts of mischief. We'll be one big, happy family. Of course I'll have to name you." He pondered this a bit and shrugged. "Oh well, I'll think of something on the way home. Come on." He then took me to wherever he was taking me. I shrugged in his grasp all the way.
"Here we are." He announced. I looked at where we were. Standing in front of us was the DEI building I saw earlier. Wait, D.E.I? Now that I think of it, if you unscramble the letters a bit, it spells D.I.E. Whoever printed the map must've made a mistake, either that or they were testing me. Now I felt stupid that an agent like me couldn't figure it out, but glad that I was now where I needed to be. We then went in. He went to one of the elevators and pressed the button. He patted me again.
"We'll be there soon enough little fella." The elevator door opened. He went in and pressed the button on the inside. The doors closed and we went up.
A man reading a newspaper looked our way. Doofenshmirtz looked his way and smiled.
"Hey" He greeted. "How you doing?" He showed me to him. "I got a pet."
"Good." The man said. "Good for you." He put down his newspaper and took one good look at me. "Do you know what kind of animal it is? It is a duck or a beaver? And why does it have a fedora on its head?" Doofenshmirtz shrugged.
"Don't know." He replied. The man was confused.
"So, you're keeping an animal and you don't know what it is?"
"Yes, yes I am."
"That can be dangerous."
"Nonsense! What trouble can this little fella get into?" He snuggled me.
"Did you show him to the staff? Only certain types of animals are allowed and I don't think beavers or ducks were on the list."
"Well, I'm keeping this whatever it is."
"Whatever!" The man looked at his newspaper again. The elevator then stopped and the doors opened up. "Aw, this is our stop." We left the elevator. "Have a bad day, sir."
"Sure." The man replied, not really listening for he was reading the newspaper again. "You too!"
"Welcome!" Doof said as he opened the door and we went in. He turned on the lights and I could see most of the apartment. "To my humble abode." He sat me down and bent down to my level. "Are you hungry little fella? Hmmm, I wonder what you eat. Oh well, I'll just cook you up something." He stood up and went to cook me up something.
My watch beeped. I turned it on and looked at it. Major Monogram appeared on screen.
"Agent P," He began. "I'm sorry to inform you but when Carl printed out the map, he wrote the wrong name of the building at the top."
"I told you I was sorry, sir." Carl's voice came off screen. "You pressured me. You know I don't do well under pressure."
"Shut up Carl!" Monogram shouted. "Haven't you already done enough?"
"It's true, sir, I really am…"
"Carl, mop up the floor. We're talk about this later."
"But sir…"
"I said we'll talk about it later!" I then heard a sad sigh.
"Yes, sir." Monogram then looked back at me.
"Sorry about that, Agent P. Anyways, you saw that he wrote "DIE' at the top?" I nodded. "Well, that's not right. It's DEI, not DIE. So, head on down to a skyscraper with the letters DEI and that's the place. Again, sorry about all this Agent P, but it's all good now. Monogram, over and out!" The screen went blank. Yep, this was my nemesis all right.
Ten minutes passed and my nemesis was still gone. I decided to find the kitchen and find out why.
When I got into the kitchen, I found him sitting at a table eating a cup of yogurt. He looked at me.
"Oh, I'm sorry." He said to me. He smiled guiltily. "I forgot you were here." I rolled my eyes. Sure he did! I then showed him my O.W.C.A card. He squinted his eyes and read it.
"Hello." He read out loud. "My name is Perry the Platypus, aka Agent P. I am a part of an organization that hires animals as secret agents. So what evil related thing you have planned, watch out, because you can be sure that I'll put a stop to it." He looked at me.
"You're a platypus?" I nodded. "And your name is Perry?" I nodded again. "And you're my nemesis?" I nodded a third time.
"Wow; I never had a nemesis before. I suppose they gave me one because with all the evil stuff I do on a regular basis. Gah, how dare they! I don't need a nemesis to spoil all of my fun." He looked at me again. "Are you sure you're not my pet?" I nodded. He sighed. "Fine. Then you can just leave." I stayed put. He noticed this. "What are you doing? If you're not my pet and you're not going to help me with my evil plans, then you can just leave." I still stayed put. He sighed. "You're not making this easy for me, are you?" I nodded. He sighed and went to the door. I followed. He pointed at it. "There! There's the door! If you're an agent as your card says that you are, then you must know how to use a door. So go on, open it up! Open it up and we'll never cross paths again! I'm not sorry about all of this. I don't know what your boss was thinking, me needing someone or some animal to stop my evil plans? How ridiculous is that! Am I right? So you can just leave." He sighed as I once again stayed put. He opened the door and pushed me out. "What part of 'I don't need a nemesis' do you not understand? Go and foil another evil person's plans, okay?" He slammed the door.
I narrowed my eyes. I wasn't going to take this without a fight! I knew what to do.
I knocked on the door and hid behind some plants in the corner. My nemesis opened his door and looked out.
"Hello?" He called. "Hello? Is anyone there? Helloooooo!" He then looked mad. "Look, if you're playing Ding-Dong Ditch on me, it's not funny! Only I can do it and only I make it funny!" He was about to shut the door when I soared in, kicking him in the face. He screamed as he sailed into the wall. He was woozy for a bit, shook out of it, then sneered at me. He stood up.
"You!" He said. "How dare you; what was that for?" I motioned him to make a move. "I don't have time for this. I got to get to my evil plan." He looked at me. "Well, what are you waiting for? Leave! We've been over this. I don't want a nemesis." I just stayed put. He sighed and went over to a laser-like machine. I went over to him, wondering what it was. He looked down at me.
"I suppose you want to know what this is." He said. I nodded.
"Well, this is my Steal-inator. I end all of my machines with the 'inator' suffix." I kept looking at him. "You want to know what it does, don't you?" I nodded again. "Well, it does what the name implies, it steals for me instead of me stealing it myself. I'll show you." He typed something down. "I type something down that I want and press 'enter.' When he pressed the last button, the machine rumbled. A hotdog then appeared on the platform. It was coated with ketchup and mustard. He took the hotdog and took a bite out of it.
"See?" He said to me. "I stole this hotdog from the vender down below. Come on; let's go see!" He ran on the balcony and looked over the side. I went over and looked as well.
A hot dog cart was down below. The hotdog vendor pounded the cart in frustration. A man was arguing with him and his daughter (Well, I assumed it was his daughter) looked down in disappointment. Dr. D laughed.
"This is the 3rd time that I stole a hotdog from him all month and he doesn't have a clue." He laughed again. "I love it!" I gave him a glare. Those poor people; how dare he! "I also stole that yogurt and other food in my fridge. Food tastes better stolen." He took another bite out of his hot dog. "I never have to worry about paying money ever again." He offered me some. "Want some?" He took it back. "Well, too bad! If you want one, steal one yourself! But you have to go down and steal one, you're not using my machine." I glared at him. I didn't want one, and even if I did, I will never steal and stoop to his level.
"And don't you think of pressing the self-destruct button." Dr. D. continued. I looked at him. Wait, did he say there was a self-destruct button? Dr. D must have realized what he just said because he clamped his mouth with his hands. "Did I say that out loud? That was just supposed to be a thought, you know, not said out loud." He looked at me sheepishly. "You didn't hear that, did you?" I went over to the machine. Dr. D then stepped in my path. He laughed, nervously.
"You know, when I mentioned the self-destruct button, I was only kidding; there's no self-destruct button. So, if you would kindly not come any closer to this machine, that would be greatly appreciated." I just glared at him. I knew he was lying. I can see it on his face. Besides, if there's not a self-destruct-button, then he shouldn't try to hide it. I went closer, ignoring his protests.
I climbed the machine a little and looked at the button. My eyes widend. Oh my gosh; there is a self-destruct button! I glared at him. I was thinking to myself, what an idiot! Who puts a self-destruct button on their machine? I shook my head in disapproval. I was about to press the button when he grabbed my hand.
"There's a self-destruct button, so what? You're not going to press it, are you?" I nodded. He looked surprised. "What? You are? Well, in that case…" He then threw me into the wall. "I'm afraid I can't let you do that. You see, I enjoy doing stealing and bad doings of all kinds, and I'm not going to let a platypus stop me!" I picked myself up and tackled him to the floor.
"Oh, it is on!" He pushed me and flipped me so he pinned me to the floor. "Ha! Who's on the floor now? I'd surrender now if I were you." I gritted my teeth. Well, I wasn't him, so I'll never give in! If he thinks he can get away with this, he has another thing coming! He'll never get away with this; that's what I have to say (Well, not 'say', but you know what I mean)! He began to get tired.
"Wow; you're not giving in, are you?" He stopped and panted heavily. "I…need a minute." He went over to his machine. "I'm parched. I think I'm going to steal me a bottle of water." I didn't hesitate. I bolted to my feet and rushed over between him and the machine.
"Hey! What's the big idea? Come on; I'm thirsty. I need a bottle of water." I shook my head and pointed to his pocket. He looked down at it. "Oh." He looked back at me. "I know I have money, but like I said before, it's better stolen. You understand that, don't you?" I shook my head. No, no I don't, and I don't think I never will. Monogram gave me this job to stop you, and I'm not about to let him down. He then went to his knees and begged like a little kid.
"Please!" He wailed. "I'm really thirsty; please, please, please, let me steal!" I shook my head. Nope; you got to do better then that. He stood up.
"Fine; you had your chance to join the dark side, but now you force my hand!" He then ran up and elbowed me to the floor. He quickly typed in something and pressed a button.
"Ha; you didn't expect that; did you?" A water bottle then appeared in his hand. He took off the cap and drank it. He sighed heavenly. "Yep, it's better stolen." He then looked at me. "I was going to steal one for you, but since you refused to join me in evilness, you get nothing!" He took another sip. I stood up and glared at him. Yeah, right; give me a break! I'll never join you on the dark side, never in a billion years! As he drank, I took this as my chance, and ran to the machine. He noticed this and pushed me back with his hand. "No; no; no!" He put the bottle down and typed in something. A box then appeared. He grabbed it and put it over me.
"Ha!" I heard his laugh. "You're trapped! Now, what are you going to do?" I let out a sigh. Come on Doof, really? A box? If you think a box is going to stop me; you're gravely mistaken. To prove my point, I jumped and flipped the box over. I then threw it at him right in the stomach.
"Oof!" Just as he was stumbling, I tripped him with my tail. He stumbled to the floor.
"Ow!" He stood back up. He put the box and the bottle in the box. "Fine; I guess I'll just have to steal a better trap for you, maybe a cage; yeah, a cage and I'll throw away the key; what do you think of that Perry the Platypus? Hey; Perry the Platypus; I think that's what I'm going to call you, Perry the Platypus." He then pressed the button. "Here comes your trap, Perry the Platypus!" The machine started making awful noises. I looked at my nemesis. I don't think it's supposed to be making those noises. He looked at it as well. "Hey; it's not supposed to do that!" Black smoke came out of it. He gasped. "And black smoke's not supposed to come out of it, not if…uh oh." The machine exploded into a million pieces. I shielded my eyes and looked at the now charred Doofenshmirtz sitting in the middle of the balcony. He coughed. Well, I think I better get going. I ran to my hover car, jumped in and strapped myself in. I lifted off and flew off from the balcony. Doofenshmirtz noticed this. He stood up and ran to the side of the building. He clenched his fist and shouted after me.
"CURSE YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUS! Hey; I think I'm going to use that. CURSE YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUSSSSSSSS!"
As I flew, I was thinking if Doofenshmirtz was the right nemesis for me.