"Life and Limb"
Chapter Eighteen – "Leaves on the Tree of Life"
By: purple
The doors of the elevator opened to reveal the third floor step-down ward; House and Lydia exited the car, made a right through a set of double doors, and headed to the lounge area. Lydia had texted Annie as they got closer to the hospital and was thrilled to hear Wilson was out of bed and getting around in a wheelchair. Luckily the traffic hadn't been too bad despite the fact that it was the Monday of the Columbus Day weekend; they had made it up from Virginia in excellent time. Lydia drove the entire way as House looked over some paperwork from his mother's estate; he was far too stressed to have driven safely.
Saturday, the day House's mom died was surrealistic. House, Lydia and Bell spent a little of the early morning hours in the room after she passed, trying to absorb what had happened. Bell was heartbroken at the loss of the woman he loved for almost sixty years. Lydia was wishing that she had more time with House's mom than just the few hours they were together. She truly felt comfortable calling her 'Mom' thanks to Blythe's warm, loving and playful personality. And House, bombarding his psyche with recriminations for doubting his mother who loved him unconditionally. He knew she would never have allowed him to suffer the abuse if she could have stopped it; the trauma he experienced and her seeming lack of action never did make sense. Now, having the answers to so many of the mysteries in his life, he knew just how far Blythe went to protect him. His doubting her actions and motives would haunt him for a long time to come.
All three of them Bell, Lydia and House, each devastated in their own way, numbly went through the motions of contacting the funeral director and Blythe's lawyer; Thomas called his and Blythe's friends to tell them the sad news. Lydia made a series of calls to New Jersey to let everyone know the inevitable had taken place. Later in the day, they went to Blythe and Thomas' home to begin sorting through things. It was very disconcerting to House to be there as his mother and Thomas had purchased the home after they married; he had never stepped foot in the door while his mother was alive. Bell pulled out the files for the meeting with the lawyer Monday morning; Lydia found the garment bag Blythe had referred to with her burial clothes. They would return to the house on Sunday to lay out a game plan to empty the place of its contents; both House and Bell wanted to sell it as quickly as possible.
Now House and Lydia were back home in New Jersey. They had decided to give themselves a few days to catch their breath; after conferring with Bell and the funeral director, they chose Friday for the memorial service and burial. It would give them a chance to spend time with the children as well as Annie and Wilson and their other friends; the calm before the storm. Entering the lounge, they looked around and saw Wilson and Annie sitting by the window. Annie caught sight of them and ran over.
"Hey," she said as she hugged Lydia. "I'm so sorry, Sweetie. Are you doing OK?" Lydia nodded.
"As best as we can under the circumstances." Annie turned to House.
"Greg, I feel so bad for you. I know what this is like," she said as she moved toward him. She knew she was lucky that House had become comfortable enough with her to occasionally return an embrace; Annie was very surprised when he actually pulled her in and held her for a moment.
"How you are feeling, Baby Mama?" he asked. Annie smiled at House's nickname for her.
"Feeling pretty good; must be the Natalins and the folic acid someone bugged me to take. What's especially making me feel good is this one," she said gesturing toward Wilson. He had a blanket across his lap and one wrapped around his shoulders; he looked very good, all things considered. Lydia walked over to him and bent down to give him a hug.
"James, you look wonderful. How are you feeling? I was sure we'd find you still up in the I.C.U."
"I'm feeling so good, it's scary. I needed to get out of there…for my mental health if nothing else. It's one thing to be a doctor spending time with your patient who's in I.C.U.; it's quite another to be the patient," Wilson said with a laugh. He looked up at House; he saw that his friend was tired, worn out by the past few days. House's eyes were slightly puffy, and his limp more pronounced. Wilson had the feeling that even with all House had to do with his mother's estate, there were going to be the need for more guy's nights out. A lot more.
"How are you doing?" Wilson asked as House sat down in the chair next to him.
"Hunky-Dory," House replied as he started to rub his leg. "I'm planning to run in a marathon next week. Wanna join me?"
"Hon, I told you a little while ago that you can have some of the Metamizole; it's been a while since you've taken any," Lydia said. "Why suffer?"
"Why not?" House snapped as his rubbing motions became more intense. Wilson realized right away what was happening.
"House, punishing yourself because you feel guilty over the choices your mother made is…insane. I don't even know the whole story yet, but…this isn't what she would want." House shot Wilson a look.
"You have no idea what she went through, how she suffered her whole life for me. And all I could do is hide away and assume she didn't care."
"Hon, you didn't know what was going on," Lydia said placing her hand on House's. "Thomas didn't know until you said something the other night. And if you never said anything…maybe we wouldn't know the truth even now." House shook his head.
"When you were talking to those neighbors who stopped by the house, I found an envelope that said, 'To be opened by my son Greg after my death.' There was one addressed to Bell, too. Neither one of us have opened them yet; we both agreed we wanted to get past the funeral before dealing with the contents. Wouldn't doubt she spelled everything out in a letter or something. Probably thought I wouldn't show up when the call came."
"Your mother thought no such thing," Lydia said defensively. "She probably hadn't been feeling well for a while and not knowing when the end would come, wrote things down in case she never got a chance to speak to you."
"Which is another thing," said House as he winced and grabbed for his leg. "If I hadn't been such a bastard and kept my contact with her at a minimum in the past few years, I could have overseen her healthcare and she'd still be here right now." He rocked back and forth for a minute, then suddenly stood up and grabbed his cane. "Potty break," he said seeing the startled looks around him. "Be back." Wilson, Lydia, and Annie watched as House gingerly walked out the door.
"Has he been like this the whole time?" Wilson asked.
"Since the point when his mom died, yes. It really is a sad and yet amazing story," Lydia said. "What Blythe did to protect Greg and Thomas was extraordinary; but she'd been doing it for so long, that when the time came to tell them the truth, she didn't know how to do it. Not until it was almost too late."
"You really liked Blythe," Annie said. "I could tell from your texts."
"Mom was such a lovely woman; thoughtful, kind…and a wonderful sense of humor. She knew how to dish it out as well as take it." Lydia looked thoughtful for a moment. "James, I understand from what you've told me that Greg has more than a bit of John House in him. I guess if you're around someone enough, you pick up habits and such. But I see a good deal of both Thomas and Blythe in him, too."
"What about the star-crossed lovers?" House asked as he returned.
"I was saying that I saw a lot of both your mom and dad…"
"AH!" House exclaimed. "Not a confirmed fact yet. Even if it was…it's going to take a while to get used to saying that moniker in a positive manner; if ever."
"So…is Bell your father?" Wilson asked hesitantly. House stared down at the floor.
"It would seem so." He related to Annie and Wilson the events of the late summer of 1958; how the attempted rape happened too early even if the creep had been successful, and the timing of Bell's visit with Blythe fell within the appropriate impregnation time frame for House's birthdate.
"So, unless by some odd medical…thing…your mom was pregnant for over forty-two weeks…" Wilson began.
"She wasn't; but even if she was, it didn't matter. Greg's mom had never been with another man other than Thomas. It's very sweet when you think about it," Lydia said with a smile.
"And Flyboy not only shot blanks, he couldn't even load the gun," House said.
"Wait…what?" Wilson and Annie were both confused.
"John never touched Blythe," Lydia explained. "Except to beat and terrorize her. He was both sterile and impotent."
"So they never…" Annie said in disbelief.
"No wonder she turned to Bell," Wilson said. "She needed comfort on several levels."
"Well…things didn't happen quite the way you may be thinking they did," Lydia said cautiously. She started to relate the story of Blythe and Thomas from the beginning as childhood sweethearts, to being forced apart by their families. House recalled the abuse John subjected Blythe to, especially after she became pregnant and he knew the child wasn't his. Lydia told the cloak and dagger part of the story; how they managed to stay in touch and get together through their friends Jack and Millie over many years.
"They said Jack and Millie were to them what you two are to us," said Lydia. "I think Blythe and Thomas saw a lot of similarities between Greg and me and themselves."
"But, why didn't she leave John in her later years?" asked Annie. "Greg was grown and out of the house. What..." Lydia glanced at House and saw him set his jaw and stare more intently than ever at the floor. She realized that she should answer the question. Lydia told Annie and Wilson how John had threatened Blythe and House's lives with his sword and pistol.
"Oh, my God!" Annie exclaimed. "When was this?"
"Three days before the son-of-a–bitch died," House said grimly.
"Wh…What?" Wilson said, stunned. "I…drugged you, kidnaped you…we almost wound up in jail! We did go to the police station! Why did she beg me to get you down there for the funeral?"
"Said she needed me down there with her; but when push came to shove, she wasn't ready to unravel the lies," House responded. He suddenly bent over, the pain making his breathing more labored.
"Greg, this is ridiculous," Lydia said quietly. "Please take the medicine; I can't stand to see you suffer like this."
"I've only been dealing with this for what, fifteen years or so? Got a lot more years of suffering ahead of me."
"Greg, haven't you suffered enough already?" Annie asked. "You grew up thinking your father was this horrid, horrible man; you didn't know exactly what your mother was going through, but you knew something was terribly wrong. And now you find out the details of what she went through…for both you and Thomas. I know this is going to bother you for a long time to come, but you've got us, you've got Lydia and the kids…you've got your friends. You're not going through it alone." Annie took a deep breath and shook her head. "Your mother may have suffered, but she never gave up. And you can't either." Annie looked at House who had picked his head up as she spoke. "I'm…I'm sorry if I'm out of line." Rubbing his leg more vigorously than ever, House let out a sigh.
"The bambino isn't even due for months, yet you already have the mothering instinct down pat," he said. "You're not out of line. I'm not in a good frame of mind right now."
"Greg, please?" Lydia asked holding up the bottle of medicine that she had taken out of her bag.
"You just want to see me stick out my tongue," said House as he tilted his head toward her.
"Every chance I get," said Lydia. She drew out the proper amount of medicine and placed it on House's outstretched tongue; they both managed a slight smile as Lydia replaced the cap on the bottle. House leaned back against the wall.
"Maybe if so much hadn't happened before I got down there," he said looking at the ceiling. "My head would be capable of handling mind-blowing information. At the present moment, that's not happening."
"House, I feel terrible that you didn't go down there sooner," Wilson said. "You knew I was in good hands; your team would have taken…fantastic care of me."
"At what point should I have left? When you were coding as you bled out in the ER? As you were in the OR being put back together?" House asked as he leaned forward to get a better grip on his leg. "How about after I found out that the Boy-Wonder oncologist has cancer?" House looked away from his friend. "I got the call in the middle of the night on Tuesday; I should have gone then." There was an uncomfortable silence as House closed his eyes and concentrated on his leg.
"So, how did you and Thomas get along?" Annie finally asked.
"Once I found out he wasn't the religious zealot I thought he was, not too bad." House saw the puzzled looks on Wilson's and Annie's faces. "It turns out he never wanted to follow in his daddy's footsteps and save the wretched from the fires of Hell; he just didn't have the kahunas to tell him to shove it. He…" House paused as he shook his head. "He and I have similar approaches to the subject of religion. We don't get why people fall for all the crap that's spit out in the name of religion. The easy answer is people are idiots; but both Bell and I like to look for the reasons in the different bits of hokum that's been written about the subject. He has an extensive collection of books on various beliefs, theories, philosophies…" House smiled slightly. "I asked him if I could borrow a few of them when things quiet down. He has everything from a book on the Upanishads to one called 'The Gospel According to Judas.' Thought that one sounded particularly interesting." House looked over at Wilson; he had a huge smile on his face. "What?"
"You…you like him," Wilson said sounding quite delighted. "'Not too bad' is far from an accurate description of how you're getting along with Reverend Bell." House rolled his eyes.
"We're not about to go out and get matching tattoos. If I haven't done that with you, I'm not doing it with anyone." House let out a sigh. "There are similarities, there are differences; don't know yet what they all mean. Whatever happens, it's going to take time."
"One thing you can say with absolute certainty is that Thomas and your mother were very much in love with each other. Someone doesn't go through what they did and hang on for all those years without having love to give you the strength to do it," Lydia said looking at House. "And you were born out of that love." House shot her a look, then closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall again.
"Greg, take things one day at a time, especially these next few days," Annie said. "I remember when my mom died; I was not only trying to deal with her death, but my jackass brother at the same time. If I didn't have Lydia, I…I would have lost it. Just don't be foolish; let yourself ask for help if you need it."
"Easier said than done," House said with a smirk. "But thanks."
"Oh, Annie, we have a favor to ask of you," Lydia said. "One of the requests that Blythe wrote down for her memorial service was that 'Amazing Grace' be played. Greg and I thought it would be lovely if you could perform the song."
"Figured we already knew a Songbird; why go with pre-recorded elevator music?" House said. Annie came over and hugged Lydia, and then House.
"I would be honored to sing at the service. Marianne and I performed 'Amazing Grace' a couple of weeks ago when Grace Methodist Church celebrated their centennial with the community at large. She played and I sang. Would that be OK?"
"It'd be fine," House said staring off into the distance. Suddenly, Lydia's phone began to ring.
"Speak of the devil; it's Marianne," Lydia said. "She said she'd call me when they finished dinner so I could talk to the kids."
"Good; I can talk to her about doing the memorial," noted Annie. Lydia stood up and started to walk to the far end of the room as she spoke to Marianne. She was feeling a little stiff since they made the drive back home non-stop. Annie followed behind her as she walked; House saw her reach around and rub her lower back.
"Baby Mama feeling OK?" he asked Wilson.
"She's been complaining about her back a lot, but I don't think it's related to the pregnancy. She says she feels pretty good." Wilson looked at House. "I don't know how I'll be feeling by the time the memorial service happens. I don't expect a miracle in the next few days."
"Only a fool would expect the non-existent," House said as he watched the ladies. "The service and burial is Friday; we were considering having the after party at Gino's. I told Lydia I thought the dining room fit my mother's request for something not too fancy, but several steps above McDonalds'."
"Your mom would say that," Wilson said with a laugh. "Gino's would be good; the dining room is separate from the pizzeria section by that short hallway. Plus they have the game room to keep the kids busy. A roll of quarters and they'll be all set." House was quiet, his eyes looking vacant as he stared off into space. "House, I feel…terrible…about the fact that I won't be able to be with you at the memorial service. I wish there was a way…"
"There isn't," House replied turning his head toward Wilson. "So don't sit around fixating on it. I'll be fine; I have Fraulein." Wilson nodded, seemingly accepting what House said; but he felt overwhelming guilt as he knew he should be with his friend…
House and Lydia stopped at Tom and Marianne's on the way home from the hospital to pick up the kids. Both Ben and Elise were very sympathetic toward House, but also enthusiastic about the spelling bee at school on Tuesday. While Ben was the only one competing, Elise was doing a great job of playing cheerleader. Ben wound up coming in second place for his class, but still qualified for the school finals. The kids went with House and Lydia as they ran various errands over the next few days; Lydia felt a need to be near them more than usual and House didn't seem to mind. They ordered the flowers for the service, with House at a complete loss as to what to order. He felt it was more than hypocritical considering how he had let his relationship with his mother deteriorate; but Lydia convinced him it was the right thing to do. Together they ordered a "broken heart"; red roses with a single line of white carnations breaking it in half. After that, it was off to Gino's to make arrangements there.
A bit of uneasiness entered the scene when Thomas came up to Princeton late Wednesday morning; he was an unknown entity to most of House and Lydia's friends and colleagues. Wilson and Annie were the only ones who knew that House was virtually certain Thomas was his father and they were getting on quite well. Fortunately, Thomas had a way about him that very quickly put everyone at ease. He got on especially well with Lydia's children which delighted her to no end. Even House had to smile as he watched Bell sit at the dining room table and play cards with Ben and Elise; he was actually persuaded to join in the game. Thomas was supposed to stay with Jack and Millie in Berry Hill; but their adult daughter, whose marriage was a train wreck, showed up on their doorstep with her kids in tow. He was going to go to a hotel, but Lydia wouldn't hear of it. Since Annie was sleeping at Wilson's place which was slightly closer to the hospital, Thomas stayed downstairs in Annie's apartment. Everything was going very well; then it was Friday.
"Do you want me to drive?" Lydia asked as she pushed the clicker to slide open the doors on the van.
"Yeah," House replied as he walked toward Bell who was next to the van; he assumed being close to eighty, the reverend was going to need help getting up into the vehicle. Surprisingly, not only did Thomas not need help, but he lifted Elise into her car seat and got both kids buckled in. "Where did you get experience with this?" House asked.
"Our friends' grandchildren," Thomas replied. "Blythe used to love spending time with them." House didn't acknowledge the statement. On the one hand he refused to feel regret for living his life the way he wanted to; on the other hand, he wished his mother could have met Ben and Elise. As Lydia pulled out of the driveway, House leaned back and closed his eyes; it wasn't that long of a drive to the funeral home, but he wanted to reserve all his energy and resources for now. He was glad he let Lydia talk him into taking a dose of Metamizole before they left home; it was just one more tool he would have at his disposal to face the unpleasant task to come. When they arrived at the funeral home, the funeral director greeted them, and took the two photo displays that Lydia and the kids made; he led them to the lounge directly across the hall from the room where Blythe was laid out.
"Reverend Bell, this is the card that we had printed listing the charities that were important to Blythe," the funeral director said. "They'll be placed by the sign-in book so everyone will see them." Bell took the card and looked it over; it met with his approval. "While we also included the donation information in the notice we sent to the newspaper, it seemed people very much wanted to honor Blythe with flowers."
"That's…that's lovely," Thomas said choking up.
"I'll go place these collages on the easels. Feel free to go in whenever you're ready; I'll be at the desk in the hall if you need anything." House, Lydia and Thomas stood where they were, none of them wanting to make the first move. Finally, it was Ben who broke the silence.
"Mom, are the adults going to go in first and then Elise and me?" he asked. Lydia reached over and stroked her son's head.
"Yes, we'll go in," Lydia said indicating House and Bell. "And then I'll come and talk to you and Elise about things."
"We were good when Mrs. Crosby died," Elise noted.
"I know you were, dear; just sit and read or do your puzzle book. I'll be back in a few minutes," Lydia said. She stepped out into the hall, and House and Bell followed her. "Mrs. Crosby was one of their caregivers at the daycare center I utilized once in a while. She died of cancer and we were told it took such a toll on her so quickly, that it would be a closed casket at the memorial service. It wasn't; the mortician did a beautiful bit of work to make her look the way the children would remember her, but not all of them could deal with it." Lydia looked over her shoulder. "Ben and Elise handled it with no problem, but…"
"They'll pick up on the cues from you," Thomas said. "If you feel at ease, so will they."
"Why don't we go in and get over the initial jolt; then we can figure out what to do with Frick and Frack," House said looking at the floor. He felt Lydia take his hand; Thomas offered his arm to her, and the three entered the room where Blythe was laid out. They looked to the left as they went in, to the end where the casket was.
"Oh, my Lord!" Thomas exclaimed.
"How beautiful!" Lydia said tearfully. House said nothing, too much in shock. The room wasn't the largest in the funeral home, but it sat about 150 people. And lining the walls, and going across the front of the room was flower display after flower display. There was the broken heart House and Lydia selected, a casket blanket made of hydrangeas in blue and purple, Blythe's favorite flower. A small heart pillow of red roses sat in the lid of the casket; Lydia had called the florist and ordered it on behalf of the children. Ben and Elise didn't know Blythe, but they had expressed to their mother that they wanted to let House know that they were sorry about his mom, too. Aside from those things, there were standing displays, table and floor baskets, dish gardens…every type of flower and color imaginable.
"Who the hell sent all of these?" House asked still floored at what he was looking at.
"Well, I'm sure some are from our friends; some from the organizations that Blythe supported or worked with," Bell said. "The rest are from your friends and colleagues." House shook his head.
"There's…fifty or more displays here," he said. "Even if two-thirds of them were from my mother's cohorts, there's no way…" His voice trailed off as he continued to look around in amazement.
"Greg, let's go up to the casket for a few minutes; then I can see about bringing the children in. We got here almost an hour early so we could do this without any visitors. Let's take advantage of it." House nodded and the three of them, led by Bell made their way to the front of the room. There was a kneeling rail placed in front of the casket; Thomas grabbed it and sank to his knees as soon as he got a look at Blythe.
"Lovey…Lovey, you even manage to look beautiful in death," he said as he began to cry. Blythe did look beautiful and peaceful; gone were the tubes and wires and oxygen mask. Instead, she wore a stunning emerald green dress, a simple strand of pearls, and pearl stud earrings. The hairdresser and make-up technicians used the picture Thomas provided of Blythe to make her look like she was merely sleeping. It was comforting and upsetting at the same time. House couldn't bear to keep looking at her; he wanted her to get up, take her for a cup of coffee, have the family dinner with her and Thomas that he had been so long denied. As House took a deep breath, he shook off the thoughts and returned to reality.
"If only she had told me," Thomas said as he wiped tears away and stood up. "I…I could have helped her…I could have helped the both of you. I…I would have killed that bastard with my bare hands."
"You would have had a partner in crime; but my way of doing it not only would've been slow and painful, it would have left no remains to be found," House said as he looked at Thomas. "Knowing what I do now…" He shook his head. "I don't believe the place exists, but if it does I hope he burns in hell." Thomas nodded and stepped back from the kneeler.
"Do you…" he asked, gesturing to the padded wooden frame.
"No; not because I couldn't get back up, but because it would be a waste of time."
"Whatever's right for you, son." House appreciated Bell giving him space on the subject of religion and faith. It was a leisure that was never afforded to Thomas.
"May I?" Lydia asked as she gestured to the kneeler. House and Bell stepped back and let Lydia approach the casket.
"I'm still trying to figure out if she's a liberal or conservative," said House indicating his girlfriend. "I'm not sure if she knows."
"I know exactly what I am. My father was Catholic, my mother Lutheran. Before my father became heavily involved in the diplomatic corps, we went to a Catholic church just about every Sunday," Lydia said. "But the more his work took over his life, the less he was concerned with…well, just about anything else. My mother wanted to keep attending church; however it was to the Lutheran church we went. At this point in my life, I call myself a spiritual Christian of no one particular faith. And it's a subject that Greg and I have agreed to disagree on; we just respect each other's opinion and don't try to change it." Thomas smiled.
"It's the best approach. Especially the respect part."
"I'm going to get the children so we know how to handle things when people start coming in," said Lydia rising from the kneeler. "I'll be right back." House watched her as she left the room; she had worn her deep forest green skirt suit in honor of his mom's favorite color. Even Elise had on a dress that was primarily that color. They were little, perhaps meaningless gestures in the bigger scheme of things happening today; but House knew why Lydia made the choices she did and he loved her for them.
"She's a very special lady." House turned to Thomas.
"You're not telling me something I don't already know," he said not wanting Bell to start in with questions about what their future held. "I wouldn't be able to handle this right now if she wasn't here." House glanced over his shoulder and looked at his mother lying in the casket. "I'm going to sit down." He headed over to the front row of chairs that had been set up. Glancing to his right, he saw the photo displays that Lydia and the children made; they did a great job. One board showed pictures of Blythe and Thomas in their early years up to House's birth. The other showed House with his mother when he was a baby, then a young boy with both Blythe and Thomas. More pictures revealed House's graduations from high school through medical school and at last, Thomas and Blythe's wedding day. But the most special pictures were the ones taken of House with Blythe and Thomas in her hospital room; it would perhaps be the only pictures he had of himself with his mother and father. Lydia also did some magic with the computer and made a picture that included Thomas and Blythe photoshopped into a picture with House, herself and the children. House couldn't look at them when the boards were finished back at the house; now they made him smile. He heard quiet talking, and turned to see Lydia coming in with the children.
"Mommy, pick me up, please," Elise asked when the stepped up to the casket. "I can't see her." Lydia lifted up her daughter while keeping an eye on her son. "Wow! You mommy's even more beautiful in person than she is in the pictures," the little girl said to House.
"'In person' implies she's alive which clearly she's not," House answered dully.
"But if she were, dear, I'm sure she'd say 'Thank you,'" Thomas said to Elise. House made a face and turned his head away; as he did, he caught sight of Ben. The boy's head was tilted to the side, and there was a puzzled look on his face. House knew just what was going on.
"Ben," he said to the child, and motioned for him to come over. There was an empty seat between House and Bell; Ben sat down on it. "When I was about your age, the jerk my mother was married to forced me to go to a funeral. The dead guy was a Marine; didn't die in combat or anything, just old age. John," House said with disdain. "Thought I should go because that's what men do. To keep my mind occupied, I sat there, trying to figure out how they did it." The boy's eyes widened. "I knew about rigor mortis…how the hell did they bend the elbows and position the hands." House looked at Ben. "You were thinking that just now, weren't you?" Ben nodded.
"I'm sorry, but…"
"Don't apologize," House said cutting him off. "Told you; I did it, too." He looked around and saw that Lydia and Elise were looking at the many flower displays. "Get through this, help your sister stay calm if needed…and some rainy, gray Saturday…I'll explain to you how they do it."
"OK," Ben said surprised, yet pleased by House's offer. "But why does it have to be a rainy Saturday?"
"One, you won't be in school; two if it's raining, no soccer. And three…that's the right kind of weather to discuss the subject." Ben smiled; he leaned forward and put his arms around House. The child held him tightly; House didn't know how to react at first, but he finally lifted his left arm up and placed it on the boy's shoulders.
"Why don't you see what your mom and sister are doing?" House said. Ben nodded, and went to the left side of the room to meet up with Lydia and Elise.
"I don't know too many of the details about Lydia's ex," Thomas said. "But even if I knew nothing, I can say with utmost certainty that you are a far better father than he could have ever been. In fact, you're better than most men; myself included." House looked over at Thomas who had dropped his head down and was staring at the floor.
"You never got a fair shot at it. I wish she'd given you a real chance," House said. "I'm sure Mom didn't doubt your ability to be a good father." House looked toward his mother's casket.
"And you?" Bell asked. "What do you think?" House wouldn't look at Bell.
"For the limited time we had together…I didn't doubt you either. I just couldn't figure things out; and that pissed me off."
"House, you should see all the pretty flowers!" Elise exclaimed as she ran to him. "Everyone must have really loved your mommy." Lydia smiled as she walked over to House.
"It really is overwhelming," she said. "There are eight displays that I believe are from Mom's friends; then there's one from the YWCA in Arlington which seems to be connected to the Purple Purse organization; also a display from The Wounded Warriors Project. There are several others from charities that I assume are dedicated to helping abused women and children." House stood up, a curious look on his face.
"Why the Wounded Warriors? I have no problem with helping the soldiers out, but I thought Mom had enough dealings with military related things," he said looking down at Bell.
"Your mother knew the kind of work they were doing to help those who were injured regain mobility and strength in their limbs; she hoped one day the research could help you." House closed his eyes and tilted his head back; Lydia reached out and put her arm around his shoulder. She knew she had to distract him or he would be a wreck when the mourners came in.
"Thank goodness the florist remembered what I said and didn't use Stargazer Lilies on any of the arrangements," Lydia said referring to her allergy. "Oh, the third arrangement from the left is from my department, and the one next to that is from medical records." She led House over to the right of the casket. "The smaller broken heart is from James and Annie." House had tried not to think about Wilson's absence, but now it was too late. "There are arrangements from the hospital, the Board of Directors, the HR department, food services…and of course, your department, Tom and Marianne, and Slick, Scotty and Misty." House looked, becoming more and more confused. He looked at the names on the cards; doctors he barely knew, departments he argued with.
"They didn't know my mother; some of these people don't even like me. Why…?"
"You may be a difficult character, Greg, but people know what you've done; they know the lives you've saved, and how the donations made to the hospital because of your work allows it to keep going. This is done out of respect for you." Lydia said gesturing at the displays. "There was just one name I didn't recognize." She showed House the name on the card; he turned his head away from Lydia.
"What kind of flower is that?" he asked.
"It's a Peace Lily," Lydia responded. "It's in a beautiful planter; I'll be able to put it in the window…"
"I'll talk to Foreman about this one," he said cutting her off. Lydia was puzzled, but didn't want to question House about it now.
"Um…Dr. House, Reverend Bell? I see cars pulling into the parking lot," the funeral director said.
"Thank you," Thomas replied. Lydia walked over to the children who had settled in on a couch to the left side of the room.
"Will you two be alright in here? You can go back to the lounge across the hall if you'd like," their mother said.
"We'll be OK," Ben said. "We want to hear Aunt Annie and Aunt Marianne play." Lydia gave each a kiss and walked back over to House; the first people had arrived. Fortunately, it was House's team, Rachel Taub, Slick, Scotty and Misty. They greeted Lydia and Thomas with hugs, and even managed to awkwardly do the same with House. He looked hard at Foreman.
"How did Cameron find out?" Foreman smiled.
"I didn't get the chance to tell you. She's coming to PPTH in November for a seminar on ER Department Management. Seems she just got a promotion down at St. Charles Hospital in Bethesda. She was calling to see if registration was closed and her call got misdirected to me. We caught up on things going on, including this. She…" Foreman paused. "She's doing well. She sends her condolences and said she'd like to have dinner with all of us, Lydia and Annie included." House looked down and away to his left.
"We'll see what November brings," he said. Foreman joined the others in the second row of seats as the parade of mourners began to file in. For the most part they were people House didn't know and didn't want to know. He was sure he'd be nodding his head and saying "Thank You" in his sleep for weeks to come. The most awkward moments were when personnel from the hospital came in; while House recognized them visually, he could not recall most of their names. He was grateful that Lydia pulled out her diplomatic skills and quietly whispered names to him before the visitors approached. He managed to get through greeting Wilson's parents. They had sent one of the dish gardens and Lydia played buffer for him by complementing it and thanking them profusely. He had just sat down, when Annie and Marianne came forward.
"Hi, Greg," Annie said. "Don't try and stand up. You've probably been on your feet too much already. Marianne and I are just going to warm up in the office. We'll be back in a few minutes." House nodded and as he watched them leave, he saw that Tommy and Shelly, Marianne's kids had joined Ben and Elise on the couch. Lydia and Thomas took their seats to his left; glancing at his watch, he realized that it was almost time for the service to begin.
"Excuse me, Dr. House; I just have to move this chair," the funeral director said removing the one to House's right. He turned to Lydia who was shaking her head. Suddenly, her whole expression changed and she let out a gasp.
"Greg!" she exclaimed grabbing his arm. House turned and faced the direction Lydia was looking; approaching down the aisle on the right was Tom…pushing Wilson in a wheelchair. House was too stunned to move as Tom backed Wilson into the empty space, then sat down in the second row with the team.
"Your doctor hasn't released you from the hospital yet," House managed to say.
"Well, my doctor is…a bit preoccupied at the moment, so I asked his very capable team if I could make this trip. They…and my physical therapist," Wilson said indicating Tom. "Said there'd be enough doctors in the room to render aid if needed." House shot a look at the occupants of the second row. "House, I know you have Lydia…just like I have Annie." Wilson slowly shook his head. "But there was…no way in hell…you were going to go through this without me being here with you." House looked away from Wilson, trying to figure out how to respond.
"I managed to hold it together after watching you almost die; after watching my mother actually die. And with one sentence, you're going to make me lose it." House turned to his friend. "Nice going, moron." Wilson smiled, and reached over to place his hand on his friend's shoulder. He knew not to leave it there for too long, but from the look on House's face he didn't really seem to mind. "Did you know about this?" he asked Lydia indicating Wilson.
"I had no clue," Lydia said smiling. House took a deep breath and stared down at the floor; he started to massage his leg.
"I'm not going to be able to do this," House said shaking his head.
"Hon, yes you can," Lydia said. "You're stronger than you give yourself credit for." He scowled as he gave her a sideways glance.
"Hello, may I have everyone's attention?" It was the funeral director. "We are about to start our service to honor Blythe. We will begin with 'Amazing Grace' performed by friends of Blythe's son, Dr. Gregory House." Annie and Marianne stepped forward to the front of the room; Marianne positioned her violin, and after a slight nod to each other, they began. They sounded magnificent, uplifting and heartbreaking all at once. Even House whose mood was far from good, had to smile. Lydia meanwhile, couldn't hold back tears. It never failed to amaze her how talented her friend was; a talent that would have remained silent forever if not for House. While not the usual protocol, there was applause for the ladies when they were finished, and rightly so. Annie and Marianne took seats in the second row, Annie right behind Wilson. The funeral director once again stepped forward.
"Now Blythe's husband, Reverend Thomas Bell would like to say a few words." Thomas stood up and made his way to the podium.
"I had the privilege and honor to share my life for nearly sixty years with Blythe. And while we spent most of that time apart, we were never far from each other's thoughts. We had met when Blythe was sixteen and I was nineteen; we were supposed to marry…but it was not to be. It took Blythe and me well over fifty years to finally be husband and wife. Blythe wrote something to say to me on our original wedding day." Thomas pulled a yellowed piece of paper from his pocket. "She held on to it, believing with all her heart that one day, she would get the chance to say this to me when we finally wed." He unfolded the paper. "'Entwined…my heart and yours, intricately and beautifully, as true soul mates and partners. Stronger…because we are together forever.'" Thomas folded the paper back up. "It was that sense of togetherness that allowed us to overcome all the obstacles. It let Blythe raise a wonderful son and channel her energy into the many causes she supported. I…I am proud and blessed to have had a woman as remarkable as Blythe be willing to say that she loved me. I now have to accept that Heaven needed another angel. I'm not going to miss her…she will be with me in my mind and in my heart for the rest of my life." Thomas held on to the podium as he looked downward and took several deep breaths. "Now, Greg would like to speak." House stood; the men passed each other, avoiding eye contact as House went to the podium. It was the only way he was going to be able to handle the emotions of the moment. Ben and Elise came over to Lydia and sat down in House's chair. He looked at them, cleared his throat and began.
"My mother was loving, generous and protective to a fault. She sacrificed her own happiness for the two people that mattered most to her; her husband and her son. But she found…joy…in the fact that in the end we…" House took a deep breath. "We were a family." Thomas smiled and nodded at House's words. "Mom was a fan of old time movies and movie actors; Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall in particular. She said she always admired them for letting nothing stop them from being together. Despite all sorts of skullduggery they had to resort to, Bogie and Bacall never gave up on each other; they eventually married. It wasn't until recently that I found out why their story was so important to my mom," he said looking at Thomas. "A while ago, Bacall wrote an autobiography called, 'By Myself'. My mother found particular inspiration in the last paragraph of the book. I can relate to it, too." House removed a paper from his pocket. "Bacall wrote, 'I'm not ashamed of what I am…of how I pass through this life. What I am has given me the strength to do it. At my lowest ebb I have never contemplated suicide.'" House looked at Lydia and the kids. "'I value what is here too much. I have a contribution to make. I am not just taking up space in this life. I can add something to the lives I touch. I don't like everything I know about myself, and I'll never be satisfied, but nobody's perfect. I'm not sure where the next years will take me…what they will hold…'" He looked at Lydia and managed a slight smile. "'But I'm open to suggestions.'" Through her tears, Lydia returned his smile; she was so touched by the references he directed to her and the children. House turned to the casket, and looked down at his mother. "Thanks, Mom…for everything." After more than a week filled with horror, joy, sadness and smiles, House allowed himself some tears. They trickled slowly down his cheek as he made his way back to his chair. Ben and Elise moved over to Lydia so House could sit. Elise reached over and patted his hand.
"On behalf of Reverend Bell and Dr. House, I would like to thank you all for coming to honor Blythe. We'll now be forming the procession to Cypress Hills Cemetery at the front of the funeral home on Clarkson Avenue. Please make sure you have your headlights and blinkers on." People began milling about, preparing to leave; House stared straight ahead, unaware of anything until he noted that Thomas was standing in front of him.
"You did a wonderful job up there. I know that was extremely difficult for you. I'm very proud; I know your mother would be, too." House looked past Bell to his mother's prone form.
He only hoped that was true.
The service at the cemetery was brief and before long everyone had gathered at Gino's. Many of the hospital personnel went back to work; the representatives from the charity organizations all seemed to have left from the cemetery. Most of the individuals that came to the restaurant were people House could deal with; his department, Lydia's department, his mom's friends, and Wilson's parents. Tom and Marianne came in with their children, who joined Ben and Elise in the game room; Scotty and Misty seemed fascinated with the vintage games as much as the kids. Slick join the others which included Wilson's two surgeons, Dr. Ellis and Dr. Condoza. The room was nicely set up; several round tables placed near each other, a long table where the buffet would be set up and the beverage station. House and Lydia decided on beer, wine and soda; although House made a bid for the hard stuff, Lydia shot it down. Each table was set with a tray of fruits and cheeses and hot appetizers were brought out shortly after the guests arrived.
"Greg, you picked a perfect place," Thomas said tapping House on the shoulder. "Your mother would wholeheartedly approve."
"Wilson and I came here one night; right before the shooting as a matter of fact. They had great food and service…thought it fit the bill." House had been standing off to the side, but his leg was now sending him a message to go have a seat. He headed over to a chair that allowed him to watch the various groups interact.
"You know, House I have to admit…those baby pictures of you were really cute," Thirteen noted.
"Yeah, what happened?" Slick asked.
"Life," House replied.
"I loved the photoshopped picture Lydia did of your parents with the four of you," Claudia Wilson said. House was about to correct her but he was beginning to recognize the futility in fighting the truth.
"Your mother would have loved to have seen the children play soccer," Millie, Blythe's best friend said. "Thomas played in a rugby league and she used to go to all the games."
"She used to sneak in the back gate, so no one would see her and watch the game from under the bleachers," Millie's husband Jack said shaking his head. "Poor thing was always terrified she'd be seen and have to answer to The Beast."
"'The Beast?' Is that what you called John?" Wilson asked.
"I called him a lot of other things, but there are ladies present," replied Jack.
"Blythe could be a bold little so and so when she wanted to be," Bill, one of Thomas' friends said. "Remember that time at the movies?" Thomas started laughing.
"The six of us wanted to go to the movies, but even pooling our money, there wasn't enough. So Blythe and I bought tickets, but not together. She walks into the theater, and 'falls' in the lobby. Well, she started to raise such a commotion about breaking a bone or something; it distracted the ushers so much, that I was able to open the exit door and let these four in," Thomas said pointing to his friends. "The little imp turned on the charm and got a free large popcorn and soda to 'make her feel better.' It didn't go far with six of us working on it, but she got it for free." Everyone had focused their attention on Thomas' story and got as much of a laugh out of it as he did.
"House, I take back every time I told you that you were…nothing like your mother," Wilson said. "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree."
"Especially when it's rotten," House said as he stood up. The food was being brought in, and while he didn't have much of an appetite, it got him away from the crowd. Though he enjoyed the story about his wickedly clever mother, he just didn't feel like talking right now. Even Crystal, the waitress who took care of him and Wilson the night they came into Gino's, couldn't get much of a conversation going when Annie and Lydia were introduced to her; he simply wheeled Wilson over, let him do the talking, and then walked away.
"It's understandable that he's like this, but with House this kind of mindset is never a good thing," Wilson said as he observed his friend wander over to the front window and just stared out at the street.
"I know; I'm going to keep a very close eye on him," Lydia said sadly. House leaned against the frame of the window. He noticed the streets were wet as it had started to rain shortly after they left the cemetery. Some idiot commented earlier that if it rains the day of a funeral, it means the deceased is crying tears of joy. What kind of moronic statement was that? Not only was it physically and scientifically impossible, it was emotionally wrong, too. His mother would've wanted to stay; to see him happy, to see him content for the first time in his life with Lydia and the kids…she didn't want to go. Her only comfort was seeing him and Thomas together, the way it should've been. He hung his head down; there were just too many regrets. The sound of the kids laughing made him turn around; in spite of his mood, he had to smile at the sight; Bell had Elise in his arms, and the two of them were urging Ben on as he threw some body language into his pinball game. It looked so perfect; a grandfatherly figure interacting with the Munchkins. As if on cue, Lydia came into the game room and joined in the cheering section, putting her hand on Thomas' back and exchanging smiles. House looked at the scene in the game room, and he knew what he had to do. He walked over to the table where his team, Wilson and Annie, and the rest of the gang sat. All of Blythe and Thomas' friends had left except for Jack and Millie; he hesitated, but realized he didn't give a damn who was there. Everyone had moved to just two of the tables; there was laughter and smiles all around. House stood silently near the group, leaning heavily on his cane and wincing.
"House, are you alright?" Chase asked seeing the look on his boss' face. House shook his head.
"No…no I'm…not alright. I…I need help." There was a hushed murmur from the group.
"House." It was Wilson who spoke. "What do you need?" A slight smile came across House's face at his friend's offer. He took a deep breath, and started to talk.