A/N: So plans changed, and you're gonna hate me because things are still super harsh, but it was either that or waiting far longer until I write the part where it gets resolved. Plus I thought I should really update tonight. If you don't wanna have your heart kicked and not healed again, wait until the next ch is out and read both :)

Also, this is the only way to answer to some of the guests' reviews, so if you're not interested, you can skip the rest of this author's note and jump straight to the story.

Guest:"Regarding your last AN, If your Maura is, as you say, a completely different character than the Maura we know, then why write her as "Maura" when she is really just an OC with Maura's name?" I didn't mean to refer to their character traits. I was just trying to say that although I'm using a real life plot, the characters it happened to aren't the same, and therefore their thoughts reactions and feelings aren't those of the real people. In short. Jane's thoughts aren't necessarily mine, personally. And I write her actions as Maura's because she's one half of the pairing and I wanted to put the IRL plot in a Rizzles universe.

Guest:"I don't know how to take your story now after reading UR A/N... A Bostonian Fan." J is very much to the point and knows what she wants. I wanted to stray away from fics where Maura is the confident one and is pursuing Jane, and flip it around, where Maura is insecure. J's beating herself up because she doesn't wanna screw things up with someone that's important, but at the same time doesn't want to leave things as they already are. As for the confrontation, read ahead :)

Thank you both for reviewing. I really appreciate it.

You park in front of her lawn and you wait for her to go. She takes her purse in one hand and reaches for the door handle with the other.

"Hey hey, what, no goodbye kiss?" you call after her, faking a tantrum. She turns, looking surprised.

"What "goodbye"? Aren't you coming in?"

"Well-"

"There's still plenty of time to get ready for the farewell party."

"It's not a party, Maura. "You roll your eyes, and wonder if she's actually planning on overdressing and showing up all fancy to a small bar gathering. "We're just meeting up for drinks."

She tilts her head, giving you a smiling This-is-stupid-I-wont-argue look and she turns away again, exiting.

"Come on, Jane."

You take your coat off as you walk into the living room and are casually throwing it over a chair when you notice empty glasses and a messy blanket on the couch. You feel your eyebrows shoot up and you turn back to where she's still taking her shoes off.

"I'm sorry it's such a mess. Bran crashed here and I didn't have time-"

"Bran crashed here?" Now all of your muscles are tightening in fury. You don't wait for her to finish what she's saying. You're not even thinking about lowering your tone or calming down. "Maura, this morning you said-"

"He passed out. He only slept on the couch, we didn't-"

"You lied to me, Maura."

"No I didn't. Jane, we didn't s-"

"But you would've! You had him in your place and if he was sober enough to fuck, he would've fucked."

"Calm down. He was too drunk to drive, and it was late and I didn't want to drive him over to his place. He passed out, couldn't make it to the guest room even."

"There are these magical things called cabs."

"Jane, you cannot be getting upset over this."

"Hell yes, I can!" You are now pacing around the room and your breathing grows quicker. You can even feel the pulsing on your forehead. "I've been stuck on this sick emotional rollercoaster and it hasn't even been two days."

She's not calmer either. You can feel her shifting into that mode where she's cold and unapproachable, and it sickens you. It stops being her. She stops being her.

"Wh- emotional? We talked about this Jane, how I said I wanted to try what it would be like to be with a woman. It was an experiment, remember?"

"Experiment?!" The sound of that one particular word makes you feel like a lab rat. And yet, you are aware of the conversation that you had, you know it was a tryout and that she's right but all of a sudden this is too agonizing. And you can't blame her because that's what you agreed on. If you ever did something, it would be to test the waters. Those were the terms. You just got carried away. A little too far away.

"Don't you dare snap at me! Do not make me sound like a bad guy just because you have changed your mind!"

It pains you how right she is.

"Oh, and you didn't change yours? Suddenly going back to not liking men more?"

"I never said-"

"Yes you did."

"Huh, well you're the one who said no coming back for seconds." You weren't gonna talk about this, remember? Oops, you just did.

It's been only two days, one day since you said you won't bring it up, but it slips out during the casual chat happening quietly between you as the guy is looking for your names on the guest-list. She's dragged you to another fancy party. Again.

Let's blame it on the few shots you just did.

Strange what alcohol does to you.

You remind yourself you need to cut down the partying and drinking. It's not that dancing and staying up late is not you, it's just that it's made you do things that lead you to question what is you and what not.

You know you will listen to yourself. But only until next weekend.

"Well, no. I told you it was curiosity. And I told you it turns out I like men."

Second rejection. Jane, stop. Enough. The party goes on and nobody knows or cares about the disappointment that is playing with your gut as if it's a punching bag. You hate it. But it's dancing time, so you give up thinking.

"And then two days ago - boom, you want me again." Your arms spread as you mimic the explosion, and you stare at her, waiting for a reaction. She takes her eyes off of you and shakes her head. You don't know what it means. "I'm your play-toy, Maura!"

"Yes, and I'm yours! That's what trying things out meant!" She's drawing out the words as if she's disciplining a school girl and it is the most condescending tone you can imagine Maura treating you with. You retort equally slowly, mocking that tone, excessively gesticulating, restless, hurt.

"You used me, Maura."

"And you used me."

Terms and Conditions, remember Jane?

"No, I didn't." I did, didn't I? "You knew from before that I was into women too. I knew what I wanted." You. "You were the curious one. You're the scientist, I'm the rat. How was I using you?"

"You have obviously changed your mind about the emotional extent of whatever this between us is. Therefore, you're also experimenting."

"Oh for fuck's sake Maura-"

"And plus, you're with Casey, Jane!" She stops you by yelling out the thing you cannot possibly mark as less relevant in this moment, and it takes you by surprise. "It doesn't matter if he's in Afghanistan. You're together, right? And you're in love with him, apparently. So, you can't be mad about Bran, and you can't demand exclusivity."

You want to tell her how you haven't thought about him for longer than you can remember, that times and things and feelings have changed, that it's irrelevant. He is irrelevant. But something stops you and your mouth is suddenly dry and immobile.

"Forget it." you manage to mutter as your legs are starting to take you outside.

"Jane, we agreed." There's more insistence in her words now. Like if she says it hard enough it's gonna stick and things will return to someplace they can realistically never be again. Because, damn it Rizzoli, this was supposed to be just for fun. You weren't supposed to fall for her. Not in that way.

You turn around but you don't face her. It's seems that you're not talking to her now, but admitting it to yourself. Regardless of how calm or possessed you remain on the outside, the things you say - they fracture you.

"You know what the stupid part is? I'm gonna let you do it again, I know it, drag me into your bed. Because I so pathetically want you that I volunteer to go through all the bullshit that comes in the package."

"You could've stopped me. Two days ago you cou-"

All the calmness goes down the drain.

"Do you not fucking listen to me?! I didn't want to. I. Didn't. Want. To."

It might've been a little too strong, a little too harsh, because there's glistening in her eyes that can only be from watering she's not allowing form into actual teardrops. She doesn't break. Instead, she grows even more bitter and you can't stand it.

"You had so many ways out. You could have not come back in the morning, but you did. You could've not kissed me again, but you did. You don't like the game? Don't play it."

"This is still a game to you..."

"Well what is it to you?"

So many things rush to the front of your brain that you can't pick one, and even if you could, it would probably not be the right or most important one. So you close your eyes and pressure them back in your head to where they can't make things worse. A burning spreads where your thoughts empty and refill and it's too much. It's all too much.

"I need to clear my head."

Your hand is already at the door's handle, opening it.

"Of cooourse you run away now." You can feel her head shake in disapproval. "A conversation a little out of your comfort zone and you're acting like a squirmy five-year-old."

"Just let me cool off before I say something I shouldn't, Maura" you hiss and then you're out, leaving the door open behind you.

Now, it's nothing like a movie scene. It's not a case where one rushes off, the other follows and they stop the fight in a fiery kiss and credits roll to some cheesy generic song. You're actually thankful she doesn't follow you, because you won't get a happy ending, you'll get more fighting and more anguish and it will keep feeling as if every sentence keeps kicking you in the gut. This is better, faster, like ripping off a band-aid.

You breathe in the cool air as you're walking to the car, but you don't feel it elsewhere even though you're only in a sweatshirt. Your head is obviously heated enough to make up for everything else.

She's standing on the doorstep and you manage to dissuade yourself from looking back at her as you start the car and leave.

If you could board that plane tonight and be really gone, it would be perfect. But it's not like that.

Off to write the next chapter and eagerly awaiting your reviews :)