Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.
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Author's Note: I know it's been a long time since I last updated, and I'm sorry but real life got in the way. So here is finally a new chapter, I have to warn you about explicit sexual content, so if that isn't for you, you might want to skip this one.
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Sawyer was sprawled out on his back, content and fast asleep with her in his arms. Kate's head was resting on his shoulder, her hand flat on his bare chest and her leg hooked over his middle, when a penetrating sound echoed through the dark hotel room, waking them both.
Sawyer blinked and rubbed his eyes with his free hand as the ringing continued. Cursing under his breath, he began to stir and tried to free his other arm out from under Kate.
But Kate moaned and nuzzled her nose into the crook of his neck, whispering "Don't answer it. It's too early." At least she assumed it was, since the room was still dark and she was still painfully exhausted.
In an unusually graceful move, considering the early hours of the morning, he managed to free his arm without disturbing her too much. Now leaning over her, forcing her to roll onto her back, he placed a sloppy kiss to her forehead before he reached for the still ringing cell phone on the Nightstand next to Kate.
Kate blinked up at him, her eyes still adjusting to the darkness, and watched him unplug the phone from the charger before he answered it, his voice sounding rough and tired, "Yeah?"
He groaned as he sunk back onto the bed beside her with the phone pressed to his ear. Kate squinted and scooted closer to him again, trying to study his face in the darkness to gauge a reaction as to what the phone call was about.
A couple beats passed where Sawyer just nodded and hummed some sort of agreement, or maybe it was just acknowledgment that he was still listening, Kate couldn't be entirely sure. Then his eyes fell on her and the look in them told her what she'd feared all along. This phone call was about her.
Richard was still trying to convince Sawyer to put her on that plane after all. She should have known Richard wouldn't be placated by the half-ass explanation Sawyer had given him via phone before they'd gone to bed last night.
Her heart started pounding, suddenly doubtful if she'd convinced him enough that he'd argue with Richard on her behalf.
"Yeah, I know." He suddenly spoke and a look of guilt flashed over his face. That's when Kate knew she had to do something. Remind him somehow of the agreement they'd both succumb to last night, and how deliciously they'd made up, first in the shower and then once more in this bed.
She leaned over him then, her curly disheveled hair shielding her face like a curtain when she placed a kiss against his bare chest. Once. Twice. Then a third time before she dared to look up at him through the unruly curls that where falling in her face.
A smile tugged on his lips now as he met her eyes just then and he couldn't stop himself from tugging on her curls that where tickling his chest before her head dipped down again and she kissed him some more.
Again and again her soft wet lips connected with his salty skin; after all they both had worked up quiet a sweat last night. Makeup sex always tended to do that. It always seemed a bit rough, but she preferred to think of it as enthusiastic instead.
But when her mouth closed over his nipple, her tongue playing with it, she heard the groan that escaped his throat. She looked up at him, her mouth still on him and even in the darkness she could see his eyes fill with desire as he suddenly scrambled for words, "Y-yeah, yeah, I'm … I'm still listenin'." And with a nod of his head he added, "Go on."
Kate smiled in triumph at the realization that she could unnerve him like this, and with the look he'd shot her she was convinced that the 'Go on' he'd just uttered wasn't really meant for Richard at all.
She vividly remembered James' word's in the shower last night, 'I'm in charge, if I let you stay, we're gonna do this my way. You're gonna do as I say, no questions asked.' So abiding by their agreement she did as she was told. 'Go on', she did as she scooted further down and slowly and deliberately began a trail of kisses down his chest towards his abdomen.
Sawyer swallowed hard and closed his eyes, clutching the phone in his right hand and the sheet next to him with his other hand, while he fought the urge to grab her instead. Opening his eyes again, his jaw clenched as he watched her now intently while Kate's lips ventured further and further down his torso.
Kate knew he was watching her and felt her cheeks blush even though the darkness of the room should've eased some of her bashfulness. They had caressed, touched, teased, kissed and loved each other's bodies countless time, yet there was this one thing she'd never done with him, or more specifically to him. But she would bet her last dollar that right now Sawyer was wondering if she'd cross that line today … and if Kate was completely honest; she was wondering the same thing herself.
When she'd started on this kissing-trail down his body, she had really just meant to tease. Remind him of last night and the promises made to one another. But somewhere somehow between his sharp inhales and suppressed groans, she became curious and had let her mouth venture much, much further then she'd initially intended.
Now here she was, crouching between his spread legs, halfway covered with a sheet and flaming cheeks that she hid with full intent behind her unruly curtain of hair and with that completely shielding her face from his prying eyes.
She still kissed away, letting her lips and tongue linger right beneath his bellybutton, before following the small trail of hair and then up again, slowly and teasingly, but this time the teasing was more unintentional as she was trying to simply buy herself some time to gather up the courage to take that next step. Or not.
Could I do this?
Women did it every day. She remembered that back in high school her friend Beth had confided in her that she had done it for her boyfriend. But Kate never had. Not in high school or any time after. She had never performed oral sex on anyone, but Sawyer didn't actually know that either. She had just told him once that she didn't like to do that, and he'd never mentioned it again.
While her lips kept on moving along his skin, her mind searched for an explanation to her own actions and reactions. She could never pinpoint what it was exactly that had prevented her from doing it in the past. She honestly didn't know, and had really never given it too much thought before now. But now that she did dare to think about it, a sickening feeling came over her that she only felt when her mind dared to think about Wayne.
She froze for a moment as that realization hit her. There was no actual memory, no traumatic experience that suddenly flashed before her eyes … none of that, just this sick twisted feeling that told her to run.
Kate forced her eyes shut, trying to keep the tears from falling. Practically lying between his open legs, with her hands left and right on James' hips, she bent down again and kissed him. She lingered again, almost desperately sucking on his skin, smelling him, tasting him, inhaling him, all of him in an attempt to force the thoughts of Wayne out of her mind.
James. James. James. She repeated his name in her mind like a mantra. James. My husband. James. The father of my child. James. A good man. James.
A tear rolled down her cheek and Kate smiled and kissed him again. She smiled, because it worked. Wayne was gone.
Unwilling to give into her fears, unwilling to run any more, she boldly reached for him. Her small hand wrapped around his erection like she'd done many times before, but this time she untangled her hair that had somehow gotten wrapped around his shaft in a quick and efficient manner.
It was probably only a second or two, but the world suddenly seemed to move in slow motion and all she could hear was her own heartbeat when Kate actually decided to wet her lips and slowly, tentatively wrapped them around him.
James' whole body jerked on contact. He wasn't at all surprised when her hands had wrapped around him, but he hadn't anticipated that at all and without further ado he quickly dismissed Richard, "Gotta go, Richie. Something came up" and practically tossed the phone to the side.
A moaned "Freckles" escaped his lips as he closed his eyes and relished in the feeling but then somehow managed to prop himself up on his elbows, just enough to watch her.
Slowly she eased him into her mouth as far as she could and she could feel his body tense under her hands, while his erection only seemed to grow some more in her mouth. He moaned and Kate fought the urge to smile, since she wasn't in any position to actually do so.
She began to move him in and out of her mouth, very slowly at first and a bit unsure if she was doing it right. She pulled her legs up and shifted, tugging them under herself and kneeled between his legs now, thankful for the curtain of hair shielding her fire red face from him as her head slowly bobbed up and down.
He seemed to like what she was doing. His breathing and the sounds he was making told her so. That's when Kate could feel her entire body blush with the awareness that she actually liked it too, maybe even loved it. Loved to give him pleasure this way and that realization shocked her to her very core, because she'd never ever thought that she could enjoy an act like this.
Wasn't this demeaning?
Wasn't this what guy's went to hookers for, 'cause proper wives don't do filthy things like this?
But even while all these thoughts were running through her head, she couldn't force herself to stop. James' physical reaction was just too strong for her to stop what she was doing now, and besides she would be lying if she said she didn't enjoy the control she momentarily felt.
He had barely had enough wits about him to end the conversation with Richard before his mind went completely blank with unexpected pleasure.
He loved when she kissed him. Loved it when she teased him, with her lips or hands or sometimes even with just a look, but like a million times before he'd simply anticipated her teasing to lead to sex. Mind-blowing –we are finally together – sex, but he had not seen that coming at all.
To say that he was pleasantly surprised did nowhere near cover how he felt when she began to take him into her mouth, but just like all good things, they never really lasted.
His body was tensing up, he could feel that familiar pull in his abdomen slowly building, and he was helpless against the sounds of pleasure that escaped his mouth. But at the same time his mind was slowly beginning to function again. He tried to fight it, tried really hard to let it go and just enjoy Kate's beautiful mouth around him, but he simply couldn't.
Why? Why? His mind screamed. Why now?
Does it really matter? He tried to argue with himself. She loves me, that's why she's doing this.
But that nagging question kept on coming back. But why now? She never wanted to before. Said she didn't like it, so why now?
And what he had initially perceived as a step forward in their relationship, suddenly felt like a huge leap back.
Was she doing this because she feared I'd go back on our agreement and put her on that plane after all? Had she seen no other choice then to bargain with the only thing she had left to offer? A god damn blow job. When and where did she begin to feel she wasn't worth more than that? When and where had this happened? Didn't she know she was worth so much more than this? She was so much better than this? Didn't she know she was better than me?
Fuck!
"Freckles?" He could barely speak her name.
She froze at the sudden sound of his voice. This wasn't a sound of pleasure. Not a moaned 'Freckles' like she'd expected, this was him actually calling her.
As if frozen in place, she simply stopped with him still inside her mouth as doubt filled every fiber of her being.
Had she done it wrong after all? She'd tried really hard to not scrape his skin with her teeth while she moved up and down. Had tried to sheath her teeth with her lips to not hurt him.
So utterly embarrassed she felt every inch of her skin on fire. Not just her face, but her entire body felt like it was blushing when she realized that he was no longer lying down, but had actually pulled himself up to a sitting position.
"Freckles?" He asked again and moved her hair out of her face just in time to see her pop the head of his shaft out of her mouth like a big delicious lollipop while her hands were still wrapped around the bottom of his shaft.
Suppressing the moan that formed in the back of his throat at that image, he tilted her chin up in an attempt to meet her eyes. But she looked anywhere but him.
His eyes had adjusted enough to the darkness in the room to see that she was blushing, but then again that wasn't really a surprise to him. Kate always blushed, and if he was honest the fact that she blushed after all this time still turned him on immensely, which at this very moment didn't help the situation one bit.
"Hey?" He tried again, still tilting her chin in his direction. His voice was soft but demanding, "Look at me."
Her eyes shining in the darkness like a cats finally darted up to meet his while she unconsciously bit her bottom lip. That look she gave him broke his heart. What had he done that would put this much doubt in those breathtaking green eyes? Could she really believe he'd send her away now, after everything they'd talked about last night? Did she really still doubt him that much?
He already regretted the words before he said them, but he knew this was the right thing to do, "You know you don't have to do this." They both eyed each other with a hint of suspicion and uncertainty before he spoke up again, "I know you said you don't like to do that, and …" He couldn't stop himself from avoiding her eyes now, regretting saying this because it had felt so unbelievingly good, "… you know, girl, I'm good …"
He cleared his throat and looked back at her, hoping she wouldn't be able to tell he was lying, "I'm good if you don't want to do that, I'll be alright."
Kate looked away now, and he could tell right away that somehow he'd fucked up even more when he saw her reach for the sheet to cover herself as she sat up. This was not going good, especially with the culprit still standing swollen and hard as a rock between them. But with every single fiber still on edge from her delicious attack, there was no hope for it to go down any time soon; he could practically feel the blood pumping through his veins that were bulging out along the long shaft of his erection.
But what was that lost look in her eyes for? What was going through her head right now?
"Hey?" He reached forward and innocently tucked a stray curl behind her ear. "Penny for your thoughts." He's never been so much at a loss for words as he was right now, just out of fear of saying anything else wrong. He desperate wanted to fix this. He needed to fix this!
My thoughts? I'm sorry I'm not as experienced as a hooker. I'm sorry I'm not as comfortable with my body like all those other women. I'm sorry I don't have hundreds of one-night-stands in my past to draw experience from. I'm sure your precious Juliet knew just what to do and how to do it. I'm sure you never told her to stop in the middle of a blowjob. I'm sorry I'm not her.
Kate herself didn't know where all that sudden anger was coming from, or why every time she felt insecure about their relationship Juliet appeared in the back of her mind with her placid smile in place being all perfect and forthright. She hated that she felt that way, but right now she hated even more that she was ruining their perfect morning together.
"Kate?" His voice startled her out of her thoughts.
She quickly looked up at him then with defeat. "I'm fine, James." She uttered tiredly before she unceremoniously crawled over his leg to make herself comfortable in her old spot.
Sawyer still sat upright, watching her over his shoulder as she settled down, and from the looks of it she was going back to sleep. He sighed and frustrated ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head to himself while he tried to put the puzzle pieces together in order to figure out what the hell had just happened.
Should've kept my big fat mouth shut. He thought as he scratched himself with the hope that his touch would somehow diminish hers on his skin, but it wasn't so. Frustrated – in more ways than one – he lied back down beside her, propping himself up on his side and watched her.
Why was she suddenly pretending to be tired? What the hell was going on?
He adjusted the pillow under his head, so that his face was now mere inches away from hers. Noses so close they almost touched, the only difference was that her eyes were shut and he stared at her in utter confusion. She looked so beautiful this way, with her messy hair, rosy cheeks and those deliciously swollen red lips.
"Are you ever gonna trust me?" Shit, did I just say that out loud?
Her eyes flew open in surprise, "What?"
"I said, are you ever gonna trust me?"
"I trust you." Kate answered without the slightest hesitation, but had to hold back the unladylike snort that almost escaped her. After all, wasn't the fact that he didn't trust her the reason they were here in the first place? Had he not tried to hide his assignment from her, they could've come to an agreement with Richard, Ben and Hurley before they ever left the island. But he hadn't trusted her enough to spill the whole truth.
Sawyer wasn't as successful in hiding his true feelings. "Right." He huffed sarcastically and sat propped up against the headboard, feening and wishing he hadn't quit smoking again. "That's why you thought a blowjob was in order for me to let you stay? We agreed last night to do this together. I wasn't gonna go back on the deal, Kate." His accusatory tone of voice wasn't missed by her.
What he'd said had definitely gotten her attention and she propped herself up now, sitting Indian-style to be at eyelevel with him before she snapped back at him, "Yeah, so I was a little scared that you'd back out of our deal, but that is not why I did that. What kind of person do you think I am?"
"If that wasn't about Richard's call, then what was it about?" He stared at her and his face fell the moments he saw that flicker in her eyes right before she looked away. Shit, had he been wrong about this?
She looked down at her hands trying desperately to avoid his intense stare but she could feel it none the less and it made her blush before she spoke, "You go down on me sometimes and I've never accused you of ulterior motives, why would you assume I had one?"
Son of a bitch ... Son of a bitch!
His brain was trying to catch up with the onslaught of information and feelings that basically bombarded him simultaneously. And within seconds, his erection was back, possibly more painful and harder than it had been … ever! His eyebrows shot up in surprised but he forced himself to keep the smile off of his face until he had an actual answer from her, "So that" he paused and pointed in the direction of his groin area "was just because you –"
Kate cut him off, "Yeah, just because I wanted to, no secret agenda." She looked away again, batting her eyelashes in that innocent way that simply drove him crazy, and damn her for pouting like that with those puffed up swollen lips.
"Shit." He exclaimed, but then a smile spread across his face, dimples showed and even teeth were showing, "And I fuckin' stop you in the middle of it, thinkin' that you were just …" he waved his hands unable to think of the right words at first but then added, "… didn't think you really wanted to do it."
She blushed again, her voice lowered into a whisper, "I thought you didn't like it."
"Oh, trust me, Freckles, I liked it. Had you kept going for a few more minutes you would've gotten a taste of just how much I liked it." He said with a sleazy grin.
Kate rolled her eyes at that but didn't fight him when he was lying back down and pulled her into his arms. And she surprised herself and him when she admitted whispering into his chest, "I liked it too."
"Well, hell, babe." He drawled, "Wouldn't wanna be the one to keep ya' from something you like doin'." His body pressed slick against hers, the weight of him pinning her to the mattress as he began kissing her neck.
Kate tilted her head to the side to give him better access and murmured, "I bet."
His lips then closed over hers in a long drawn out kiss while their bodies tried almost desperately to get even closer. He hovered over her, bracing himself on his forearms, one hand on the back of her neck to hold her in place while he kissed her. Her arms wrapped around him, clinging to his back and pulling him closer to her. Their legs were intertwined, one of his thighs parted hers and he grinded it into her causing her to moan into his mouth.
Without ever breaking their scorching kiss Kate spread her legs for him, impatiently pulling on his back again until he complied and settled between them. Kate pulled her knees up, wrapping her legs around his waist with the heel of her foot pushing into his lower back. That's when Sawyer pulled back, his lips hovering over hers as he teased her, "Someone's impatient this morning."
Kate just nodded, not in the mood for any more games. Sawyer shifted over her, his hips grinding skillfully into her, causing the length of him to rub along her and passed her entrance. Kate gasped at the sensation and he did it again, his eyes trained on her face that was more visible now with their room slowly lighting up with the sun rising outside.
"James." She looked up at him and the need in her voice destroyed any ideas he had had of teasing her a bit longer. He drew back once more, his hips lifted off of hers and his hand reached between them to position himself at her entrance.
He slit inside of her in one fluid motion, causing both of them to moan into each other's mouth.
He slowly began to move and her hips began to rock along with his, but one firm hand gripped her hard and pushed her hip down into the mattress to keep her still before he plunged into her once more. He had to keep her from moving or he wasn't going to last this time. She complied – not like she had choice – and let him set the pace. He took her so deliciously slow, so unlike the way they'd done it the night before, and she savored it. His lips withdrew from hers and that caused her to open her eyes and actually look at him as his face hovered right above hers.
Their eyes locked on each other's and his hair fell in his face, swaying along with every breathtaking trust of his hips. Sawyer opened his mouth and she watched him hesitate before he almost moaned the words to her, "I'm glad you stayed, Freckles."
"Me too." She huffed and her right hand pulled him back down into a kiss.
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4 days later … somewhere in Spain
Things had changed. Every assignment had been changed because with Kate now along for the ride Richard had decided to take a completely new approach, very much to James' disapproval. But a deal was a deal, and they had to move quickly and trying to come up with yet another plan that didn't involve Kate to this extend had become fruitless at this point.
Within the last three days Kate and he had run this con two times and both times it had gone down without a hitch. She was truly something and he'd be lying if he said that it didn't unnerve him just a bit at how good she actually was at this. Playing her part to the t, lying, scheming, seducing … he couldn't help but wonder what could've been had they met under different circumstances long before the crash. They would've made quite the team.
He adjusted the knot on his tie one more time before he grabbed his suit jacket of the hanger and slipped it on, glancing in her direction and watched her press her lips together to even out her lipstick.
The dress she wore was short, black and sleeveless, leaving nothing for the imagination. He wouldn't mind taking her out on a proper date dressed like this, with his arm around her and his hand on her hip claiming her as his. But the fact that she was going after a mark wearing that little-bit-of-nothing had a sudden jealous rage through him that was ranking right up there with the way he'd felt when Jack uttered those three little words to him 'I had her'.
He grunted out loud at the memory and it caught Kate's attention as she looked over at him, "What's wrong?"
He had you! He fucking had you and this guy's going to try to have you, that's what's wrong! "I can't get this tie right."
"Let me see." She said and began fixing his tie that in her opinion looked already perfect the way that it was. She glanced up at him then, meeting his scrutinizing gaze, "This isn't really about the tie, is it?"
He frowned at his own transparency, but had the decency not to lie, "This guy's different, Freckles."
"I know." She said and went back to applying her make-up.
"Do you?" Sawyer asked stepping behind her and meeting her gaze in the mirror. He couldn't help but close the gap between them and place both his hands on either side of her hip. The thought of pushing the dress up and bending her over this sink temporarily caused him to lose his train of thought, until he looked up again and saw her smirking back at him. Great minds think alike!
"We don't have time, James." She said with a tinge of disappointment, but held his gaze for a moment before she went about fixing her hair, knowing very well that he was about to give her yet another speech about how she'd have to be careful.
"Look, honey, those two old German chumps were a piece of cake. They never even saw you coming, but this guy …" He pause for affect "… this guy's a different cat!"
She was done with her hair just then and turned to face him, "Are you worried because he's handsome?"
His eyebrows shot up, his voice surprisingly high-pitched when he inquired back, "Do you think he's handsome?" His hands gripped her hips again and tightened.
Damn, she'd just poured kerosene all over his open flame, feeding the fire, but too late to go back she went for honesty, "Yes, James, I do." He grunted disapprovingly and frowned at her but she carried on because she had a few doubts of her own that needed nurturing, she looked down and fidgeting with her wedding ring, "You don't think I'm pretty enough to get him to leave with me? You don't think I can pull this off."
Confusion contoured his face; one hand eased up on her hip and cupped her chin instead, forcing her to look up at him. "You got this." He said calmly. "No doubt 'bout that. I'm just …" he sighed at a loss for words "… this guy's slick, he's …"
"Like you." Kate supplied when he'd paused again.
Son of a bitch, she was right! Is that what worried him about this? That she was up against someone like him?
As the truth in her words sank in, Kate couldn't help but smile when she framed his face in her hands, "I can handle someone like you?"
The smile on her lips eased some of his uneasiness, he forced himself to smile and tease her back "Do you now?"
"I've had plenty of practice." She beamed and poked him in the chest with a manicured finger.
He sighed and swallowed hard which caused Kate's smile to falter because she realized that he was truly worried about her, "If anything doesn't go according to plan, you get the hell out of there. Promise me, Freckles."
She nodded then, swallowing the lump in her throat before she answered him earnestly, "I promise."
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End note: I haven't given up on any of my fanfics, I just haven't had any time to write lately, so please bear with me. I'll update as soon as I can, that's a promise. Let me know what you all thought. xoxo