Just gonna apologise in advance for this chapter cause Loki isn't in it until the very end and though I don't ship them at all there is a hint of Thor/ Jane but….not really. If you really hate that I don't mind if you skip this chapter but I kind of needed to write it for …..plot. Shockingly. Not a thing I usually do!

4.

Jane watches the thunder clouds gather out the window and sighs to herself for what feels like the thousandth time. It has been impossible to continue any of her work in these past few weeks beneath the persistent clouds that seem to follow her now wherever she goes, and she wishes she did not know the cause of it. Wishes it was not starting to bother her.

But there is so much else to bother her. She glances across the room to where Thor is inhabiting the sofa, a book in his hands that he only half pays attention to. He seems far away, he has done ever since they came back. After the initial joy of his first appearance she began to realise more and more that he was not with her after all. Oh yes he was as sweet to her and courteous as ever, but he wasn't there and it never went further than that first kiss, never went further than sweet and courteous and certainly Jane knew she was not the one who was holding back. That they slept in different rooms and behaved more like friends than anything else was certainly through no choice of hers.

She was far from stupid and, having come close to guessing the cause she had tried to talk to him about it. But all of her inquiries as to what was wrong and if she could help had encountered only negatives or grunts and the one time she had dared to ask if it was anything to do with Loki all she had got was a grunt and a scowl. After that, if anything, it seemed as though he had closed off from her more than ever. Which had answered her question really; it was – and she could understand that, to a point, but still didn't see why it should so affect their relationship to this degree.

She wished she was not becoming slightly bitter about it but the truth was that she was. In retrospect she remembered all the events that had followed their immediate return from the Dark World and the complete disregard for his own life with which Thor had plunged himself into battle. At the time she had thought only that such was his way but he had never before seemed so careless of his own life, like it would be nothing to give it up. She suspected that he would still relish the chance to die to save her he would say and possibly half believe it, but it would not be for her. She was beginning to suspect that it would never be her.

Which did not mean that she did not love having him around, not in the slightest; they got on and after all he was becoming immensely useful even talented in the kitchen – she just wished that if friends was all they were to be that he would admit to the fact. She put down her coffee and wandered over to kneel down on the floor beside the sofa and rest her head on one large and comforting arm.

"Hi" she said. Thor frowned;

"Hi."

"What are you reading?"

Thor flipped the book and waved the cover at her, she smiled; it was one of the books of Norse mythology that Darcy had picked up back when this was all new ground to them.

"So how does it translate? I mean – did these things actually happen?"

"Some of them –" Thor replies slowly – "Some of them exactly as your stories report and some of them ….differently. Some of them not at all. It is strange, the way you have viewed us."

"So they're not all like the stories report? The people I mean? Are they better or worse in real life?"

Thor thinks about this seriously for a moment. In truth, if he was being honest to himself he has been reading more and more because it was something Loki always did. He has lost sight of himself in the last few weeks and, uncertain as to who or what he is anymore has more and more started to behave like the only person who made him feel complete. He has started seeking to be Loki in an attempt to find himself.

"Better –" he shakes his head – "And worse. In truth I no longer find myself in a position where I might judge."

"So say – this one –" Jane points to the page he had rested on – "Did it really happen? This "Lay of Thrym"?"

Thor looks down as if he has to remind himself what he was reading and chuckles ever so faintly –

"I'm sorry to say this did. I am sorrier still that it is one of our stories that made it into your world's mythology –" he turns a page absently and immediately wishes he hadn't, Jane too looks down and sighs. The illustration is Loki, different hair, eyes, build – but quite unmistakably Loki. Thor's lips twitch and for a brief moment his fingers stroke the page;

"Thor –" Jane begins gently, but he looks at her, with that far away stare and the clouds in his eyes and shakes his head at her so pleadingly that she stops. Outside the thunder crashes in the tense and trembling sky.

Little changes day after day, until one afternoon Jane gets up to answer a knock on the door in a more than usually foul mood –

"We have a doorbell –" she begins, sees Sif standing there, looking utterly confused by this statement and sags a little "Oh it's you. you must be here to see Thor" She stands aside to let Sif in, unimpressed by the manner in which she barges past, barely looking at her – "Y'know –" she adds – "I was reading about you and I was expecting someone a little –" she smiles terribly sweetly – "Blonder." Sif dashes her with the look of a thousand deaths, centuries later the wrong done to her hair still manages to rankle. To Jane's relief Thor does not particularly pleased to see her either; but as he is incapable of rudeness to a lady he acknowledges her presence with all the appearance of pleasure he can muster.

"Thor we need you back in Asgard" Sif says, not one to hedge around the subject. Thor sits back down, dejectedly;

"No" he says – "You don't. I have already explained myself to the All-father and will return in time. Until then I prefer to remain here."

"Thor you cannot –"

"Hey Lady –" cuts in Jane – "You don't get to tell him what he can and cannot do –"

"Jane please –" Thor groans, and then pauses, nodding at Sif and gesturing Jane – "What she said" he mumbles. Sif's eyes flash angrily and unwilling to admit of any jealousy towards Jane she lashes out only at Thor –

"It is not right that the only son of the All-father malinger so long on Midgard mourning the loss of a traitor to the realm!"

"What?" Thor is on his feet instantly, angrier – indeed more anything – than Jane has seen him since he came back, reaching alarmingly for Mjolnir for the first time since she can remember – "Sif you and I have ever fought side by side but I swear I will strike you down if you dare –"

"Woah woah woah!" Interjects Jane, quickly inserting herself between the two of them, as Sif's hand flies instinctively to her sword – "This is my house and there will be no fighting and no striking down of any kind without my permission, do you hear me? Jesus, and we used to worship you guys as gods? C'mon, work it out!"

Thor grumbles and puts down the hammer, Sif relaxes the hand on the sword.

"Thor –" she tries again, attempting to make it more patient this time – "There is something very wrong with –" she frowns, not sure exactly what it is that is wrong – "We are not sure you have spoken with the All-father – he is – different, we do not know –"

"Well but – that is ridiculous –" Thor huffs – "I spoke with him myself. Who else could it have possibly –" he trails off, damning his slowness and Jane gets there at the same time. The three of them stand for a moment all thinking the same thing, only Thor saying it and so quietly that only Jane can hear –

"Loki."

Jane hangs her head and feels something fall out of the base of her heart – Loki. She should have known better. Should have known that the weight between them all this time was that of the name he had not uttered, not once. Sif looks between them, feeling slightly guilty and wishing to remedy her previous complete lack of tact she asks Jane most politely if she would like her to leave the room while they discuss it. Jane nods and soon as she has gone – awkwardly – into the kitchen and closed the door she turns to Thor. He does not look at her for as long as he can help it but under the strength of her remorseless gaze finally looks up –

"No" he shakes his head – "I am not going –"

"Yes" Jane sighs deeply – "Yes Thor you are. If there's a chance – any chance it's him you have to – you know you do."

"Why?" he argues, more debating it with himself than with her, she can tell, and get my heart broken all over again he thinks – at least he thinks he thought it – suddenly looking at Jane in horror –

"Yeah" she nods, grimacing – "You said that out loud."

"Forgive me Jane, I –"

"No don't" she says – "I should have known. You could never break your heart over me could you?" She says it more factually, less sadly than she feels it. Thor just shakes his head at her in lost agreement.

"You should have told me –" this at least she can be angry at him about – "You should have told me what he was to you instead of making me think – Thor I don't mind if we're just friends but I wish you had told me so in the first place."

"How could I?" he says sadly, rhetorically – "When I barely knew myself? I still do not know – I do not know what will come of this or if it's even – and if it is if I will not simply kill him for doing this again –"

"You're confused" she nods – "I hear it – but I don't want to hear it right now. I'll still be here and I'll still be your friend but please – go." She forces herself to smile as she clasps Thor's hand and he squeezes it sorrowfully as she kisses him on the cheek.

In the silence Sif tentatively reappears. Thor looks once more at Jane and then nods at Sif –

"I will come" he says.

_x_

The time it takes for them to reappear in Asgard is time enough for Thor to get angry in, fully settling himself into that feeling of anger like a comfortable cloak he is pulling around himself. He feels almost relieved by having –a at least for the moment – decided on this one emotion. On meeting the others they all re-iterate what Sif has said and when Heimdall mentions that he has in fact seen Loki in Asgard in his more unguarded moments Thor becomes convinced. He turns down all of their offers to accompany him to the throne room ad storms in alone. He roars at the guards to leave and confused and alarmed they scatter before him as he storms down to hall to where the apparent All-father slouches in his throne. Thor inwardly shakes his head at himself; that stance is nothing like Odin's, how could he have been so taken in?

Odin raises his eyebrows at Thor's sudden and violent entrance and opens his mouth lazily, almost like a yawn, to comment –

"Loki enough –" Thor hisses – "No more illusions".

The apparition smirks and is still smirking when he transforms, shimmering, back into Loki, a resplendent Loki, glorious and beautiful on the throne, even to Thor's furious eyes –

"Now you see me brother" he smiles – "I wondered how long it would take you."

_x_

Ha ha, yeah I left it there! I'm so sorry for the lack of Loki here but I promise to make it all up to you in the next chapter. I'm sorry to anyone who didn't like the amount of Jane in here but well, I don't hate Jane, she is just a small mortal and so does not need to die for my ship, also I think it's kind of cheap to just treat Jane badly in fanfic due to wanting her out of the way. I really think Thor thinks of her more as a friend than Romantically, that he reserves for Loki. I also think that they would break up amicably hence writing it as such.

Next chapter will see sexy fighting and moves towards reconciliation. In other words: Normal Service Will Be Resumed. :-)