Arigatou ありがとう

Dramatics 演芸会

"My daughter! My daughter is gone! I can't get through to her! She must have been kidnapped! Contact the police! We have to request an emergency deployment of the SDF, just in case!" – Tamaki Suoh, Ouran High School Host Club

"Arthur, stop pacing." Hope watched as her husband paced the room, his eyebrows furrowed and his lips in a frown.

"I can't stop," Arthur replied, giving his wife a glance. "I have to be occupied somehow."

"What are you so worried about?" Hope frowned, watching as Arthur continued his frantic pacing.

He gave her an exasperated look, momentarily pausing in his pacing. "Our daughter's out on a date!"

Hope raised an eyebrow. "So? Dan went on a date last week."

Arthur waved off the statement. "Dan is Dan. The girl was going to break up with him anyway."

Ouch.

"Besides," Arthur continued. "This is that… Ivan boy." He wrinkled his nose and continued his pacing.

"Don't you mean Ian?" Hope corrected, raising an eyebrow. She sighed. "There's nothing wrong with him. Besides, Amy's dated boys before."

"He isn't the same as that Alan or Jason kid-"

"Don't you mean Evan and Jake?"

"-I actually liked that Alan kid; even if his glasses made his head look too big." Arthur frowned. "And Jason's Jason."

"Ian's a lovely boy," Hope complimented, her eyes actually shining with admiration. "He's quite a gentleman, isn't he? Did you see the way he kissed Amy's hand when he stepped through the door?"

"He's just doing that for show," Arthur replied swiftly. "He's just trying to get us to like him. I bet underneath all the glamour he's got tattoos. Or maybe even a motorcycle. Guys with motorcycles are bad news."

"You have a motorcycle," Hope interrupted.

Arthur waved his hand dismissively at the comment. "Details, details. The point is is that I don't trust that kid."

Hope gave her husband an exasperated look. "What do you hate so much about him?"

"He's British!" Arthur gave his wife a look of disbelief.

"Are you kidding me?" Hope asked, bewildered. "What does that have anything to do with this?"

"It has everything to do with this," Arthur replied, looking absolutely at a lost at his wife's ignorance. "He's got the accent, the clothes, the mannerisms. He's even got a butler! What sixteen-year-old kid has a butler?" He went on, seeming to have forgotten his wife's presence in the room. "I bet he's just using her for money. You know we're pretty rich too. I bet he's going to try to marry her, and then kill her so he can get all her money!"

Hope gave him an annoyed look. "You've been watching too many crime shows."

"It's prepared me for situations such as this," he replied without missing a beat.

"Ian's fine," Hope insisted. "It's not like he's going to kidnap her or anything."

"How do you know he's not?" Arthur snapped, his head already swirling with different possibilities. "How do you know he doesn't have her locked up right now?" His eyes widened in horror. "Maybe he has her tied up in his trunk." He looked at Hope with ever-growing horror. "What if he's got her shipped off in a box to Canada?"

"Why Canada?"

He went on with his whirlwind of theories. "What if he locks her up in a cave full of explosives? What if he tries to feed her to sharks? What if he tries to cut her head off with a fan?"

Hope gave him a look of bewilderment. "Why would he do that?"

Arthur stopped and snapped his fingers, pointing at his wife. "Because he's crazy."

"You're the one that's crazy!" Hope snapped.

"It all makes sense," Arthur went on, ignoring the frustrated sigh on the other side of the room. "It's no wonder why he carries handkerchiefs in his pocket. I mean, who does that? And no teenage boy goes around wearing Armani on a daily basis. Everyone knows that Polo is the real deal."

Hope's eye twitched. "I believe that he told us he plays polo."

Arthur snorted. "Yeah, like that rich kid could ever manage to get on a horse." His eyes widened, and he turned to look at Hope with a new light in his eyes. "I bet he abuses animals."

"That makes absolutely no sense!"

"I'm home!" Amy appeared in the doorway, her cheeks flushed and her eyes bright.

"Amy!" Arthur swept his daughter into his arms, practically squeezing the life out of her. "You're alive! You haven't been shipped off to Canada!" He paused for a moment. "Not that there's anything wrong with Canada. Their pancakes and maple syrup are amazing."

"Dad?" Amy said, her voice sounding muffled. "You're crushing me."

Hope gave her an apologetic smile over Arthur's shoulder. "How was your date, Amy?"

Amy smiled nervously as her father let her go, giving her a searching look. "Ah, well…"

"Go ahead and tell us, Amy," Arthur encouraged, giving his daughter an enthusiastic look. "You found out he went to jail, didn't you?"

"What?" Amy sputtered.

"Arthur!" Hope snapped.

"What?" Arthur gave the two an innocent look.

"Actually…" Amy gave her parents a shy smile. "He kissed me."

Hope grinned. Arthur blinked.

Click.

"I'll kill him!"

"Dad, put that gun down!"

…

a.n. I had way too much fun thinking this up. XD

I've been reading and writing a lot of angst lately, so I decided that it was time for some humor.

I based Arthur off of Dan, except making him more dramatic, and I based Hope off of Amy, but made her more outspoken.