Chapter 6 How we met
Wanda's point of view
"Once we start watching the memories, we are not going to stop until we've watched them all."
I was sitting on a recliner chair, on Vision's lap. My head was on his shoulder. His hand was in mine. His other arm was wrapped tightly around me. Every so often, I raised my head from his shoulder and we kissed.
"You did the right thing Wanda, everything will be all right" he reassured me.
"I hope so, Vis. I hope we all survive this because I can't imagine or bear a world where we don't all survive."
Howard's point of view
*Memory 1*
She was gorgeous. Thick curly auburn locks, enormous brown eyes, slender figure, well-dressed, polite and well-spoken… so why was I so afraid of her? Why couldn't I speak when we were in the same room? It was embarrassing and disconcerting. Steve and Bucky pulled me aside.
"Howard, what's going on with you? Why are you being so mean to Agent Carter?" Bucky demanded.
"I'm not," I protested
"Why don't you speak when she's around, then?" Steve asked,
I blushed and Steve grinned.
"You like her, don't you?"
I nodded
"So… why don't you… ask her on a date?"
"I can't even speak in the same room as her…"
"Why not?"
"I have profound social anxiety… always have and always will."
"Why?"
"It's… complicated and… I don't like talking about it… excuse me".
Maria appeared at the door. I went to talk to her.
"Howard, what's going on? Chester said you wouldn't talk to Peggy".
I blushed again
"Oh" said Maria, "We need to talk… I've met my soulmate and, so it seems, have you".
I gulped
"Relax, Howard, I'll arrange everything. I think we should change our arrangement".
"OK"
*END MEMORY*
*Back in the room*
"Wow…"
"It's called social anxiety, Anthony. You have it too" I snapped, Peggy took my hand in hers and gave it a gentle squeeze.
"Not as badly as you do."
"No, but you still have it."
Peggy's point of view
*Memory 2*
I thought I knew what to expect with Howard but, instead of waxing lyrical about what he was working on, he was more tight-lipped than a clam's backside. I was puzzled, until I noticed something… Every time I even looked at him or spoke to or about him, Howard would blush.
"Maria, is Howard OK?"
"What do you mean, Peggy?"
"He never says boo to a goose when he's around me, and… he blushes rather violently."
"He likes you… a lot… but… and please don't ask me about this, Peggy because I cannot tell you anything more than what I am about to say. He had a very scary experience a few years back and he never fully recovered. He and I were dating… well, sort of, but we're not any more. I met my soulmate… we're still going to be friends, though. I'm his therapist…"
"I see"
"I promised him I would set up a double date."
"OK"
Howard's point of view
*Back in the room*
Tony was looking at me in awe.
"So you weren't the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist the media pretended you were?" he asked
"Absolutely not."
"What caused the crippling social anxiety?"
"If it's not among these memories, I will tell you, but I want you to remember that it was utterly humiliating and terrifying."
I felt Peggy's hand on my shoulder.
*Memory 3*
Howard's point of view
Maria had arranged for the 4 of us to see The Sound of Music at a Broadway theatre. She also arranged for us to have dinner beforehand.
"What do I say to her?"
"You tell her she looks lovely"
"Did you give her the list of questions?"
"Yes"
When Peggy arrived, she looked a little upset.
"Hi"
"Hi"
"Are you OK?"
"Yes… just… my boss being a prig as usual"
"What did he do this time?"
"He doesn't believe that I am capable of anything beyond busywork"
"That must be frustrating"
"It is… he's a misogynist"
"Oh"
"I know that's rather a strong word, but it describes him perfectly."
"You look beautiful"
"Thank you"
Obie, Maria, and Peggy prompted me through the conversation we had over dinner… then we went to the theatre.
"Would you like some ice cream?"
"I would love some, thank you"
While we were in the theatre, I slid my arm around Peggy. She reciprocated. We held hands on the way out of the theatre.
When we were in the car on the way home, Edwin drove while Peg and I sat in the back of the car and made out.
"Thank you for a wonderful evening, Howard."
"My pleasure. You'll think about what I said, right?"
"Yes I will"
The next day, Maria said
"Peggy has submitted her resignation to the SSR. She wants to take you up on your offer".
"Wonderful"
We had an informal interview (it was really more of a cosy catch up in my office… where I formally asked her to be my girlfriend, and she formally agreed.) and she started work as my Personal Assistant…
At lunchtime on that first day, she brought me some homemade chicken noodle soup that Ana had prepared and had Edwin bring to the office.
"Mr Stark, I have your lunch"
"Thank you, Ms Carter. Ana has sent two cups… perhaps she intends for you and I to have lunch together?"
"That would be nice, though it won't help the gossip."
"What gossip?"
"The girls in the typing pool have a bet going about when you and I are going to hook up"
"Hmmm… I don't like idle gossip, and they know that… After lunch, I will give them a stern talking to!"
I kept my word.
"Ladies, I expect you to work in silence and not speculate about my personal life. Anyone caught gossiping from now on will be terminated immediately".
"Mr Stark"
"Yes, Ms Carter?"
"Colonel Phillips is on the phone for you sir"
"Thank you, Ms Carter"
I went back to my office.
"Colonel Phillips"
"We've got approval… You, Barnes, Carter, Rogers, Sousa, Stane, Carbonell… 0800 tomorrow morning at the location we discussed"
"What about Thompson?"
"He wasn't approved."
"Does he know?"
"Not yet"
"Why didn't they approve him?"
"I have no idea. I will make the calls, you tell Ms Carter".
"Yes sir, we'll be there"
"And Stark?"
"Yes?"
"What's going on with you and Carter?"
"Truthfully or off the record?"
"Off the record"
"We're dating"
"Good. Don't worry, I'll keep your secret".
I waited until Peggy came back before I closed the door and pulled her into my arms.
"Colonel Phillips got approval… all of us"
"Really? Oh, Howard! That's wonderful".
We kissed hard
"Why don't you stay with me tonight?"
"I'd like that"
"Well, when we're finished for the day, we can go to your apartment and get your clothes, and then we can go back to the house and Ana will whip up something incredible… and then"
Peggy giggled
"That sounds like fun"
"OK, well, I need to make some more calls, so why don't you continue with the analysis?"
"OK"
One last quick kiss, and we went back to work.
A thought occurred to me…
"You're going to tell her how you feel tonight"
I swallowed, suddenly crippled by a wave of anxiety.
Maria and Obie came in, Colonel Phillips had called them and instructed them to come to the SSR North East office.
"Howard? What's wrong?"
"I Ummm… want to… Ummm say… something… but…"
"All right. Obie, why don't you find Peggy and have her bring some coffee?"
"OK"
"Obie, can you extend an invitation to Rogers, Barnes, and Thompson? Tell them I said they're welcome to stay at the house tonight because then we can all leave together in the morning?"
"That's a great idea Howard, and very kind"
"It has happened occasionally"
Obie chuckled
As soon as Obie left, I blurted out
"I want to say… those three words to Peggy, but I'm terrified that she'll reject me"
"OK… take a breath… imagine what's going to happen tonight."
"After dinner we'll go to our rooms, shower, get ready for bed because we have to be up super early tomorrow morning"
"And we can't eat or drink anything until after the procedure, once we've had dinner, I mean."
"Right"
"After we shower, we'll get into bed and I will pull her into my arms and that's when I'll tell her"
We finished the workday, we went home, Ana had prepared a small buffet
"I thought it was the best workaround, sir"
"No problem Ana, I trust your judgment"
"Thank you sir"
After dinner, we went to bed early — we had to be up early the next morning to get ready.
When we were alone in my room, I said
"Peg…"
"Yes?"
"I love you"
"I love you too, Howard"
I felt myself relax completely after I said that.
"Why don't we share a shower?" Peggy suggested.
"OK"
After our shower, we got dried and went into the bedroom. I put on pyjama bottoms with no shirt. Peggy did the same. We got into bed. I pulled Peggy into my arms. She curled up against me with her head on my chest. I could see the exhaustion in her eyes… it was mixed with something else… wanton desire.
"We need to be up super early tomorrow, Peg, we should probably get some sleep."
"OK…"
"Listen, Peg, I want to take things slow when it comes to the physical side of our relationship."
"OK"
"After the experience I had… I just feel that it's better to take things slow… I mean, I want this relationship to last, so… we should take our time and get to know each other better first."
"I understand Howard… taking the next step is a massive deal"
"Thank you"
Peggy yawned, sat up, kissed me hard on the lips and curled up against me again
"Goodnight Howard"
"Goodnight Peggy"
"Love you"
"Love you too"
She fell asleep within minutes… I however, lay awake for a while. When I finally nodded off, I had terrifying nightmares… Peggy shook me awake and calmed me down…
"Why don't you tell me what happened?"
"It was the same nightmare I've been having every night since I was 19 years old… about my brother…"
"What happened to him?"
"On the night my father murdered my mother, in a drunken rage… he set fire to the apartment building. Edward — my brother — was badly wounded in battle. He keeps calling me a wimp for being unable to go to war with him…"
"That's horrible."
"It's not the worst nightmare I have. That one I do not wish to discuss… at least, not at present."
Back In the room"
"Something very similar happened to Pietro and me… Hammer Industries stole a Stark Industries bomb and blew up our apartment building. We were newborns… our mother hadn't stood a chance and our father… brought us to you" said Wanda.