Scars are for siblings Chapter 5, a stargate: atlantis fanfic

Disclaimer:I own nothing involved in this story.

Okay, so I'm definitely sure that I'm going to have to change the rating from T to M, but I'm still trying to decide, let me know what you think. Also, I hope you guys like this chapter as much as you liked the previous ones.

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July 20, 1972, 3:24am

"Doctor, I still don't understand, what's wrong with him?"

Rodney couldn't process anything in the world around him except that soft voice next to his head.

He forced his eyes open just a crack, and quickly snapped them shut.

Blinding, white lights tortured his bloodless retinas, he gently eased his eyes back open, and looked to his left.

A mass of super curly strawberry blonde hair met his eyes, as well as a purple jacket with a torn hood. Jeannie.

"Jeannie..."he managed to groan, trying to breathe through his mouth, discovering an intubation tube in his throat.

He fought the tube, but then he gave up, resigning to let the machine breathe for him.

"Doctor!! Doctor, he said something!! He's awake!!"said the mass of strawberry blonde hair, turning to look at him.

Rodney, tilted his eyes slightly to look at her, and gave a half-hearted bitter smile through the tube.

"Oh Rodney,"she choked tearfully, stroking his hair back, and looking at him sadly,"Why? Why?"

Rodney closed his eyes,"Why'd she have to bring that up now? Why can't she just be glad I'm here, why does she have to ask?"he thought, his heart sinking farther into his chest.

"Rodney? Rodney!?"she cried, shaking him by the shoulder,"Wake up!!"

Rodney groaned, opening his eyes to glare at her,"Stop it!!"he hissed, trying to talk through the tube.

She breathed a sigh of relief,"Rodney..."she breathed, leaning down and putting her arms around him,"Why would you do that Rodney?I know its bad, but Rodney, suicide!?" she said, looking at him with tears in her eyes.

Rodney looked at her, anger flashing through his eyes,"I wasn't trying to kill myself,"he said defensively,"I just wanted the pain to go away, I didn't really try to kill myself."

Sh sighed and sank into the chair next to his bed,"Rodney..."she sighed, she stopped abruptly, and stared at her hands,"Rodney, Mom and Dad..."

Rodney closed his eyes, and sighed around the tube,"What do the Bitch and Bastard want to do with their favorite little failure now?"he asked as sarcastically as he could, talking around the tube.

Jeannie's eyes flashed,"Rodney!!"she whispered, putting her hands up as if to stifle his words,"Don't say that, if they hear you say that..."

"I don't care!!"snapped Rodney, looking fiercely into her eyes, and then looking at the ceiling.

She sighed, and took his hand,"Alright, alright, do what you Rodney, but try to remember, what you do affects other people, not just you."she said, quietly scolding him.

Rodney's eyes snapped open, fury and rage flashing across his face, he tried to shout, but was hindered by the tube, he ripped it out of his mouth, and swallowed massive gulps of oxygen, his fury building.

"You think I don't know that!?!?"he shouted, his arms flailing furiously,"You think that I haven't thought about this every single second of every single day?!?! I don't need you tell me that I'm a screw up and that I ruin everyone's life!!"

He collapsed back onto his pillow, his chest heaving, his face flushed.

Jeannie looked fearfully at him,"Rodney...you know that's not what I meant..."she whispered terror stricken, she backed up a few feet,"Rodney, if you don't know that I love you, then..."

"I know.."whispered Rodney quietly,"Believe me Jeannie, I know, I know you love me, but I can't do anything to stop, I've tried, believe me..."

She swallowed quietly,"I know,"she whispered, taking a few small steps forward ad sinking back into the chair, and taking his hand gently,"I know Rodney...I know..."

She leaned forward in her chair and rested her head on his arm.

Rodney closed his eyes and exhaled heavily, steadying himself,'So...what did Mom and D...Da...Da..."he stuttered, trying to steady his voice, he couldn't say the name,"What did Mom and...Him...decide to do with me?"

Jeannie opened her eyes, and lifted her head to look at him, she sighed,"They've decided that they can't stand the idea of having a suicidal son anywhere near them, so they've arranged for you to go to Twin Pines Children's Psychiatric Treatment and Rehabilitation Facility in Toronto,"she replied sadly.

Rodney sighed and closed his eyes,"I'm sorry,"he whispered to her,"I'm sorry about all of this, I'm sorry that you're the one who had to find me..."

"It's okay,"she quickly reassured him, squeezing his hand,"I totally understand, I mean, if Dad had found you...you never would have made it to the hospital."

He sighed, and slipped his hand out of hers and rolled over so his back was facing her.

"Rodney..."she began, startled and hurt.

"I just wanna be left alone for a little while,"said Rodney, not even turning to say it to her face.

Jeannie fell silent, and her head drooped, then she lifted her head,"Hey Rodney, I'll just go and get you some hospital food, I know how much you like it."she said, faking brightness, then she got up and bounded out of the room, and down the corridor.

July 20, 1972, 3:56am

"Jeannie?"

Jeannie looked up from the tray of unappetizing food she'd assembled for Rodney.

"Oh, Agent Hartley, why are you here?"asked Jeannie of the man dressed in a formal black suit.

"I just heard of Agent McKay's condition, I've come to confirm,"said Hartley, glancing around as if he expected Rodney to pop up out of the floor.

Jeannie looked at him furiously,"Well agent Hartley, agent McKay is still the same, he's lying in the ICU with tubes up his nose and down his throat, he's being pumped full of saline, and blood, and he's almost dead because he was so miserable he sliced his arms up so badly he hit an artery, and you have the balls to ask me about my brother's condition?"she snarled, outraged.

Agent Hartley blinked,"Jeannie, I'm sorry about agent McKay, but what am I supposed to do about it, I'm a member of the CIA, not CSIS, I have no jurisdiction in Canada!"he snapped, almost equally as angry.

"Well, for starters, you could stop calling him agent McKay, he has a name, it's Rodney, he hates the name McKay, and he doesn't need to be reminded that he's a McKay every second of every day! Also, you could start paying more attention to Rodney's actual condition, rather than thinking about how much government funding went into making him into a full fledged junior agent,"snarled Jeannie, not ready to be appeased.

Agent Hartley sighed,"Alright, alright, you win, Jeannie, and I wasn't here to just check up on the resident Canadian brainchild, I was actually here to give this to agent McKay, sorry, Rodney,"he said, handing Jeannie a white envelope with the official CIA seal on it.

"What is it?"asked Jeannie, examining the envelope.

"It's a discharge order, issued directly from the US government, it also contains a formal apology, and a medal for services rendered, it's for Rodney," he said gently, looking at her.

"A formal discharge? A medal?"she said slowly, cocking her head to the left,"You mean...Rodney's being fired?"

"I'm sorry, I truly am,"replied agent Hartley,"but the US government has a very strict policy involving using minors in Federal affairs as it is, we had to make a special exception for Rodney, and now, well the US government has a mandatory law involving people who attempt to commit suicide, they are to be discharged immediately, it doesn't matter who they are, it's a mandatory discharge."

She sighed,"Oh great, this is just perfect!"she huffed,"As if Rodney wasn't miserable enough, now he's being fired!!"

She gave one final snort, turned on her heel and stalked off down the corridor, headed towards Rodney's room.

July 20, 1972, 4:16am

Rodney lay still, silent, and alone, thinking about his predicament.

He sighed, and shifted into a more comfortable position.

He was going to a mental facility, one that doubled as a rehab clinic for kiddies all hyped up and drugged up on speed.

He knew it was going to be really bad, as in terrible, after all, his parents had finally done what they'd wanted to do for years, they were getting rid of him.

"I guess I should have expected this, after all, the Bitch never could stand having something wrong with her perfect life..."thought Rodney bitterly, remembering all the times his mother had told him he was a mistake, even when he'd tried his best.

He thought back to the time he was recruited by the American CIA, it was after he'd built and brought his sixth grade science fair project to school, the US government had showed up, and after a grueling six hour interview, he was recruited.

He thought bitterly to the beating he'd been given after that little incident, it'd been worse than all of the rest of them.

His father had screamed and shouted at him called him a freak, and said he'd hated him.

Then he'd dragged Rodney up to Rodney's room, and had...

Rodney shut his eyes tight, attempting to block the flood of memories soaking back into his brain.

That little sliver of light that would seep into his room when his father was pushing the door open, the sound of those rusty hinges creaking open, the screech of the springs as he settled himself...

"No, no, no, no,NO, NO,NO, NO, NO!!"screamed Rodney's mind, the doors in his mind crashing back down, refusing him access to the memories.

Rodney began to whimper as the memories threatened to overtake his weary mind, he began to thrash wildly, and hold onto his head.

He thrashed and jerked, and finally, without warning, he flew into a seizure, his whole body jerking, his mind paralyzing, and all he could think were broken, disconnected thoughts as his head repeatedly slammed into the pillow behind him.

The last thing he could remember before he passed out was,"I wonder what Twin Pines will be like...I hope it's not too bad..."