A/N: hi guys sorry for the slow update, I decided to have a go at NANOWRIMO this month, long story short that didn't work. Anyway here's the next chapter of Diamonds story, I know a few of you wanted to see her mentor but I don't see that happening straight away in District one. Please be patient and not too mad, but most of all enjoy :)

Fourtieth Games:

I stood at the back of the stage with the other victors as the mentors volunteered, they make a big deal for the cameras but we decide weeks in advance, this year its Brandi and Calix. Every victor is required to mentor at least once, in district one this usually happens two years after their games, in order to give them time to recover. If the mentor takes to the job then they may do it as many times if they wish. If not well there are always plenty of other victors to take their place. Next year will be my turn, it's expected of me to mentor at least once and I'm terrified but I don't let it show after all I've got time to prepare.

Once the mentors have volunteered and the tributes reaped then the games can begin.

Jewel didn't get the chance to volunteer for the games, not that she didn't try, but her dress was a bit too restrictive for running and one of her classmates got to the stage first. They were both strong candidates, pretty and deadly but that didn't help them when the boy from three Beetee activated his trap. Smart kid I think as I watch his interview from home, but not much of a looker, the Capitol will grow bored of him soon. I on the other hand know my place as the victor of the moment is secure, this pleases me more than it would have done even a few months earlier.

Back in one Jewel hated herself for not getting the chance, her parents shocked by the shame she'd brought on them eventually threw her out of her home and she'd come knocking at my place late one evening shortly after the end of the games;

"I'm sorry Diamond, I didn't know where to go" she'd sobbed, shivering despite the heat of the evening.

Dad had allowed it and she'd come to live with us, taking one of the many spare rooms. That first night we'd sat around the formal dining table for a change as Dad made awkward small talk with Jewel.

"Diamonds off to the capitol again soon aren't you?" he says, reminding me of a trip I was trying to forget, Demi had mentioned some new client with certain tastes that didn't sound to fun.

"Yea day after tomorrow" I mutter in reply,

"What do you do there all the time?" asks Jewel perking up, she asks me questions all the time about the Capitol, but this is un-surprisingly the first time she'd asked me what I do there.

"I entertain the capitol" I say, keep it simple.

"Diamonds an actress" my Dad cuts in, ah such a simple lie, to my credit I had asked about the acting thing but Demi had only laughed telling me that I'd be far too busy for any of that nonsense.

"Sure am" I reply with a grin.

"Oh what are you in? I've never seen you." Now she's getting nosey I think, ugh my brain is all over the place tonight, I think of the pills in my bottom draw I could really do with one right now.

"I'm exclusive to the Capitol audience right now, doubt they'll ever let me expand" I explain quickly before excusing myself.

After slipping into my room and taking two pills my mind feels clearer and happier, all the drama and emotion had messed me up for a bit there but now I was ready to face them again. There are more nosey questions over dinner as to what I'm acting in at the moment and my fellow stars, the lies flow easily though and I start to build up a good picture of what 'actress Diamond' does with her time in the bright city.

I almost forget my reality as I travel down on the train, Demi reminds me of it as usual though;

"Tonight's client has certain needs that I know you should be happy to meet"

"I'll see how I feel" I taunt "I may have a bit of a moment"

She just rolls her eyes at me and leads me to the usual place.

It took three pills to calm my mind that night after, after the man. I never asked his name simply calling him sir as he requested.

"You did good last night" Demi says stroking my hand the next morning, it's the first time she's ever complimented my work, I didn't think there was much that could shake that cool persona of hers but something managed it.

"I'd like to go home now please" I mutter.

On the train I dream again, this time it's Jewel, but it's not she's also Demi and she's laughing at me, she's calling me all these name, telling me what I already know, I'm a whore, a slut, I enjoy it really. I wake up as the train pulls into one shivering and hating myself as usual.

As much as I try to hide it people notice that I'm becoming more withdrawn and quieter over the next few weeks. I spend less time pestering Silk and other mentors and less time outside my house, Jewel gets herself a job in a wig factory dying the artificial hair all different colours before its assembled, she comes back with orange hands and her usual rant on the unfairness of the system.

"I gave my childhood to that training centre, the least they could do is give me a job in return, I'm one of the best knife throwers in my class, climbing, agility. I aced all the classes it's only because of that dead bitch that I didn't get to win the games." She paces up and down my living space as I grip my head from all the noise she's making "I mean no offence Diamond but how hard could it be for them to let me teach there. You victors are always off doing other things anyway. I bet it's my parent I bet they spoke to Paris or Hale or somebody and now they've banned me from that place. I gave my childhood to that training centre." And on and on she rants.

I would feel for Jewel if I didn't know the truth, they don't need her at that centre because there are hundreds of girls like her. The districts full of natural and not so natural beauties with a deadly knowledge and the thirst to train others for the games. As much as she may think it Jewel isn't unique, none of us are. She eventually calms down enough to help me prepare dinner and scrub the orange off her hands.

"Maybe I'll stick at this job for a bit, learn the trade more" she ponders aloud as she cuts some vegetables "maybe I can become a wig designer, everyone needs wigs right?"

I smile and nod, wondering if I could find a moment to sneak another pill before we eat. My head feels heavy and serious, I'm starting to see flashes of blood and swamp. I waver slightly and have to grip onto the counter to stay upright.

"Diamond" I hear dad calling me from the hallway and force myself straight again, I can fight this for his sake I know I can. I leave Jewel in the kitchen and find him stood at the doorway to the house, he bends down to untie his work boots and I see someone stood behind him;

"Diamond, how lovely to see you" smiles Daria she tiptoes around my father and invites herself in; she looks at me and frowns "Is there somewhere private we can speak dear?"

"I suppose" I smile at dad who is looking at me with a concerned expression and lead her to the study, she takes a seat and looks up at me as I hover by the door. Something's not right I decide.

"How are you feeling dear?" she asks as she crosses her legs.

I shrug "fine, happy how are you"

"We're worried about you Diamond."

"So we're skipping the formalities then?" I smirk at her leaning against the doorway.

"Just pass me the pills Diamond" she replies her voice clipped and formal.

I scowl "I don't know what you mean"

"Yes you do", she stands up and steps towards me, she may be about three inches shorter than me but she still manages to tower over me. "We've all been there Diamond, looking for a way to escape. Heck some of us have lost our battles. But you your young, you have potential."

"Potential to lie on my back and do as I'm told" I hiss shutting the door on us "why do you want to deny me the one thing that's making this whole thing bearable"

"Because, you are a strong woman now, you don't need help to survive this period of your life. It will get better" she rests her hands on my shoulders and looks into my eyes, I feel so patronized, she doesn't know me.

"No screw you. I'm in control" I wriggle out of her hands, "I know what I'm doing and so what if I need a little boost to stop myself snapping the neck of the next puffed and perfumed capitol man who asks me to suck his.."

"Diamond!" Daria snaps holding my shoulders again, she pulls me around and forces me to sit on the chair she was just in, "Do you not think I've heard the excuses before" she scolds.

"But.." I interject

"No! You listen to me child and you listen good" she glares at me and I shrink into the chair, my hands beginning to shake and all I can think about is that little jar of pills in my room.

"Ouch" Daria had just slapped me on the cheek "what the hell"

"Focus girl" she says "you need to snap this habit of your before it breaks you. You're young, you're strong. I've dealt with others in your situation before and I've not failed once. Now where do you keep your pills?"

"None of your ... ouch" I get another slap.

We're being pretty loud right now and I couldn't figure out why no one was rushing to my aid, where was dad and Jewel.

"no ones coming to save you Diamond" she sneers and I am reminded once again that my sweet old neighbour is a murderer like the rest of us, she was trained for this. To her maybe I am just a stupid child.

"Dad!" I scream, but there's no reply.

"Your father knows something is wrong with you dear" she says her voice softening slightly "he told me to do anything in my power; we're all worried about you"

I lower my face from her glare and struggle to think of a way out of it, my one escape mechanism is now a negative thing to them. They say I should struggle and fight every day to stay sane; I should just do as everyone says. Well no that's not for me, I'm Diamond Hart I'm a fighter and I'll fight them every step of the way and come out on top. I know that what I say next will be crucial.

"If I tell you where the drugs are will you help me?" I ask carefully.

"With what?" she probes; she's not going to trust me straight away is she?

"I'm tired" I tell her "I'm tired of the capitol and their games" I let a tear seep out for effect.

"It's part of your life now" she explains "you need to ba able to take what they do to you with out the artificial help."

"No" I say shaking my head "No I can't not anymore, there must be a way to ..." I pause what I'm thinking is so wrong, but what else can I do now "Stop them"

"Things like that take time Diamond" she answers eventually "give me the drugs and we'll talk later, depending of course you keep off them"

I nod and stand up leading her up stairs to my room, I open the bottom draw and take out a small pot, I shake it to indicate it's still mostly full.

"just take them" I sigh "there not worth the trouble" I toss the pot into her hand "I'll still want your help though"

"Time Diamond, give it time" she replies before leaving my pills in hand. I think ahead to my next engagement with the twins, I'm sure I can make it two more days without the pills. Until then of course there's always the small collection at the bottom of my draws, I dig one out and take it before collapsing on my bed, I'll just have to get better at hiding them I suppose.