Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental multi-fandom project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 28 April.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "X-Men: Evolution" and all associated characters and situations are the property of Marvel, used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

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"The Wrong Burger Joint"
By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

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There are moments in life that - despite inanity, stupidity, pride and presumption - deserve a good laugh, usually because of the people involved. The man who shoves the woman out of the way because he knows CPR, only for her to tell him that when he reaches the part about calling a doctor, she's an M.D.; the thug wielding a bike chain who tells a man in a suit to give him all his money only to drop the chain and run when the man opens his suit jacket to reveal a big black gun clipped to one side of his belt and a big gold star clipped to the other; the resturant employee who gives bad service only for the customer to turn out to be an undercover inspector; these are the kinds of people who makes us just stop and go 'Wow, are you stupid'.

Today, another person will join their ranks.

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It started casually enough. It was just after three in the afternoon and the after-school crowd had filled up the Gut Bomb Burgers in Bayville, Long Island, New York. Teenagers and young adults filled booths and tables, chatting with friends and eating burgers and fries, chasing them down with shakes and sodas; a picture of Americana. While the exact locations, foods, cliques and styles had changed, the youth in the Gut Bomb were a modern echo of an eighties pizza parlor or a fifties drive-in. Not much attention was made to the man who looked around nervously as he approached the counter, the Gut Bomb had developed a reputation because of some of its regular customers and that reputation wasn't all good in some people's opinion.

The clerk behind the counter greeted him according to protocol when the man reached the counter, "Hi, welcome to Gut Bomb Burgers. What would you like this afternoon? I can recommend our number nineteen with extra onions."

"How about..." the man suddenly took a step back and pulled out a handgun, pointing it at the clerk, "Everything in the register! Now! And nobody else move!"

Throughout the building, several things happened almost simultaneously...

A man with grey hair lifted his drink cup to take a sip of Cherry Coke - old style, Coca-Cola with actual cherries in it instead of the more common cherry syrup. It was the main reason he ate at the Gut Bomb.

A petite ponytailed brunette nodded at the brown-haired young man sitting across from her. That young man closed his hand into a fist and pointed it at the floor where the robber stood.

Two other young men shared a table, one large and 'big-boned', the other spindly and wiry with a toad-like face. They looked at the robber in disbelief and the wiry one's face twitched as though he were about to spit.

Another couple looked at each other in silent communication before they looked towards the robber and the male reached for his rose-tinted sunglasses.

Then it was as if a hurricane broke loose inside the Gut Bomb as the building began to shake, causing the robber to loose his balance; a glow of energy surrounded his gun and jerked it out of his hand split-seconds before a beam of red energy blasted it into pieces; a large glob of sticky slime went flying through the air and hit the floor; the robber fell to the ground landing in the slime, ending up immobilized and trapped.

And finally, a member of the local police department, a grey-haired veteran detective who sat his drink down, looked over at the man unconscious on the floor and shook his head.

"Somebody picked the wrong burger joint," he observed.