Disclaimer: Nothing in the Charmed world belongs to me and no copyright infringement is intended.
A/N: Um, Wow. I've never had reviews quite that demanding before. I must agree with everyone who said that I am evil though. I admit it. My username says it and my profile suggests it. But I do have a good side to. That being said the next chapter is up super fast for all of you to enjoy. Even though it will probably get me called evil just as easily.
Chapter 14 Love and Hate
Piper looked quickly to her oldest son and back to the newcomer and had to admit that they did share the same color eyes and his hair was only just slightly darker. It wouldn't be hard to pick out the features of the grown man in the son that she adored. But she knew that it could be a trap. "How do you know?" she asked her son in worry as Leo also moved forward next to his family ready to protect them from anything. Phoebe and Paige also stood guard near Chris not sure what to make of this new development.
The young time traveler shook his head at this. "Always so suspicious. Because there is a link between us. We sense each other, now if you don't mind, we don't have a whole lot of time." With that he sidestepped the little family and went straight to Chris' side, pushing past both Phoebe and Paige who seemed almost dumbstruck by what he was doing. Once he reached him he kneeled on the floor beside the couch and placed one hand on his shoulder softly. "Hey, you still with us, Kiddo?"
Chris stared up into his older brother's eyes and took in his appearance. His blonde hair was neatly trimmed and his almost boyish face was clean-shaven and the look of innocent concern in his eyes made Chris want to shout in glee. It had worked. It had really worked. The single tear that he had shed earlier was now joined with many more as a deep sense of relief infused his entire soul and his body began to shake with the pent up emotion that he had been holding in for so many months now.
Wyatt could both see and sense the inner tempest within his brother. It was almost too much emotion for the older sibling to accept but after years of sharing a mental link with the Chris he had grown up with, who had often times been engulfed in painful emotions, Wyatt was able to withstand. And with this new bout of emotions all of Chris' normal barriers fell, as he was no longer able to sustain them.
With that Phoebe sunk to the floor grasping the sides of her head crying out in pain. Paige and Piper both rushed to her side not sure what was happening to her, neither of them taking all of their attention away from the scene between Older Wyatt and Chris.
Wyatt turned to see the distress his aunt was in and suggested the only thing he new would help her. "Paige, you've gotta orb her out of here. The emotions that she's channeling are too much for her to take."
Paige seemed hesitant to do this but Piper nodded to her letting her know silently that they could handle everything. So reluctantly Paige took them away from there.
Piper stood and walked forward with Leo next to her as they stood just a few feet from the young man that their son would apparently grow into. Neither of them could see anything that might lead them to believe that he was evil but looks could be deceiving.
Wyatt looked up to them and he had a pleading look about his face. "We need to work fast if we are gonna save Chris."
"I'm sort of confused here," Piper said staring at the two of them. "Are you the evil Wyatt that Chris told us about?" She hated to ask the question but ever skeptical, she had to know the truth.
Wyatt's eyes widened and a hurt look covered his face but Chris answered for him. "No… this Wyatt… very different." His voice broke again as he spoke, as he grew weaker every time he tried.
"So it worked. The future is really changed?" Leo asked as a sense of relief washed over him.
"What part of we have to work fast do you two not understand?" Wyatt asked in exasperation ignoring his father's question.
Chris couldn't help the weak laugh that wracked his body with pain. "Give up, Wyatt… Their suspicions… have to be allayed… before you'll get…" His words broke off this time, as he was not able to voice them anymore.
Wyatt turned to his younger brother and snorted in derision. "I don't give a damn about their suspicions. You saved me, Chris, and now it's my turn to save you, but I need Dad to help me with that." He turned to Leo with an expectant look on his face.
Leo was now sure that this version of his son was not evil. If he were he wouldn't be begging them to help him save Chris. But hadn't Chris betrayed them in a way? "Wyatt, I understand that you feel you owe Chris for coming back and keeping you from turning evil but he was willing to sacrifice your younger brother to do it. I'm all for trying to save him if we can, but there are still some things that we need to take into consideration. You have to understand that neither of us knows why you'd be this concerned over someone who was willing to watch your brother die. You have to admit that it looks a little suspicious."
Wyatt was about to make a harsh retort but Chris reached out squeezing his arm begging him to think before he spoke. Wyatt looked down to Chris and could see the pleading in his eyes combined with the pain his body was suffering. "Dang it, Chris," he muttered under his breath and then turned back to them. "Listen, Dad, you need to kill Barbas. That's the only way to break this curse. The Elder that blessed the athame died seven years ago today, ironically. Both of them have to be dead for the curse to be broken. Then you can heal Chris. I'd do it myself but right now I'm sharing my younger version's powers and they aren't anywhere near strong enough to kill Barbas."
Leo's eyes widened at that. "Wyatt, I was in a complete rage earlier in the cave when I used that power. I can't just turn it on at will. I'm upset that Chris is dying but it's nothing compared to the feelings I felt when you and your brother were in danger. I don't know if it will even work. I want to save Chris, but I'm just not sure if I can do it again."
Wyatt again turned to Chris, this time his eyes holding that pleading look. Begging his brother to release him from a sixteen year old promise that he had made. "Chris, please!" he said his voice full of emotion.
"No, Wyatt… Just let it be," Chris whispered. It was enough for him to just have his brother there with him until he died knowing that he was good and that he truly did love him, but he couldn't stand the thought of them knowing who he was. What if it didn't matter even if they did know? What if Leo didn't really care enough to kill Barbas? The Leo he had grown up with wouldn't have cared enough. As a matter of fact he had never killed Barbas in the last six times that Chris had visited the past. Would this version of his father be any different? And if he couldn't how much more pain would that bring to Chris? Over the past few weeks Chris had watched the bond form between his younger self and Leo and part of him had been extremely jealous over the fact but another part of him had secretly enjoyed the fact that Leo could care for him. He couldn't bear the thought that it could all be a lie.
"Let it be! Damn you, Chris," Wyatt raised his voice pulling his arm from where his brother grasped it. "Don't you understand what you are doing to this family? Your version of the future was very different than mine is. You don't know what is gonna happen, but I do."
Chris flinched at the harsh words but his brother had gained his full attention with them. No, he couldn't know what would happen to them now, other than the fact that Wyatt was good. "What?" he whispered.
"If I just drop it and go back to my own time you are gonna lay there for the next three hours suffering excruciating pain until you finally drown in your own blood. It's a horrible death, Chris. I know. I saw it. My younger self refused to leave. And then with you dead those two small children, free from the promises they made will reveal all of your secrets. This family is gonna be devastated. Oh and that's not all either. Since Dad is going to wait too long to go find Barbas, by the time he finds his lair he'll manage to slip away and it's gonna take the next six years of him constantly searching to find Barbas and kill him. By then, those two will be teenagers and though they will still love their father, neither of them will hardly know him anymore. The family will basically be torn apart all because you are playing martyr right now. That's the future you are creating for us. Do you really want to see this family ripped apart?" Wyatt had started crying as he described the future he had come from and Chris was slightly taken back by the lengths his father would go to in his quest to find the demon that had killed his son, not just his son but him personally. Chris reached out his hand again grasping Wyatt's arm trying to offer him some comfort from the life he had created.
Leo hearing his son's words looked to the two small children on the other side of the room concerned for their future and was struck by the way the younger child was clinging to his older brother's arm, the same way that Chris was clinging to Wyatt and his eyes widened as he truly compared the children to the two young men before him. It had been so easy to see Wyatt's features in the older version that had come through the portal, but only after he had claimed to be their son. But now looking at his youngest son he could see similarities between he and Chris. That dark brown hair that he had thought looked so much like Piper's even though he really wasn't her own son. Those crystal green eyes that were so expressive and it hadn't been but a few days since they learned that Chris was truly a Witchlighter, just like his youngest son. There were too many coincidences to ignore them.
He looked back to Chris and a disturbing thought struck him. Chris had been willing to let the young boy die to save Wyatt and he had said that Wyatt's brother would do anything for him, including die for him. Then Barbas had said that Wyatt's little brother was destined to die for him. He suddenly felt as if the world was gonna come crashing down around him as he looked at the young man that he was sure his son would grow up to be. "Oh my god, Chris!" he said unable to hold back the emotions that were swamping him as he grabbed a hold of the arm of the couch that was nearest to him trying to keep himself upright as he felt his legs turn to jelly beneath him.
Piper turned to Leo grabbing his arm as she noticed the stress he seemed to be in. She hadn't yet come to understand what Wyatt was getting at but she figured that Leo had. "What is it, Leo?"
Wyatt saw the way his father swayed on his feet and was positive that he had gotten through to him. Now he just needed to convince Chris to admit it himself. "Chris, please. Let's end the secrets and give Dad the motivation he needs to kill that bastard of a demon."
Chris hadn't really noticed his father's movements or even the words that he had said. He was too wrapped up in the description of the future that Wyatt had laid out before him. "Your future… it's sad… but everyone's alive… and you're good," Chris tried to say in between choked breaths. "Might change… be worse."
Leo felt his heart constrict. Chris was so afraid of making things worse that he'd die before he'd tell them the truth. Piper was still staring at him in concern but he just shook his head at her and stood straight gathering the strength he'd need. "Wyatt, where is Barbas' lair? You said I eventually found it in you future." Leo decided to have faith in the thought that Chris was his son and he'd do what needed done to save him even if Chris himself was against it.
Wyatt turned again to his father and Chris even managed to turn his head. They could both see grim determination in his eyes and Wyatt was more than pleased to see it. "You'll need Phoebe and Paige to show you where the Necromancer's lair is. Barbas' lair is only four passages west of it."
Chris began to speak, wanting to tell Leo not to do it, to leave things as they were, but instead Leo orbed away as Chris' words faded away to nothing. Chris turned back to Wyatt and his head shook slightly. "What have you done, Wyatt?"
Wyatt just gave him a tight smile knowing that he couldn't say what he really wanted with Piper in the room. But as if she had sensed his need to be alone with Chris she turned to her two younger sons and ushered them out of the attic and to their own room. For some odd reason she felt that the two young men needed time to talk with each other and she had a lot of thinking to do. The children didn't really want to leave but Wyatt knew that he would be able to sense what was happening through his older self so he reluctantly agreed with his mother and obediently led his still distraught little brother out of the room.
Once they were gone Wyatt turned back to his brother. "I'd do anything for you too, Chris."
Chris seemed as if he wanted to speak but a coughing fit struck him instead and he turned his face into the couch. Once the coughing was over and he pulled his head back up Wyatt could see blood staining the couch where he had coughed. He reached out then and held his hands over Chris' chest letting the small amount of healing power that he shared with his younger self, light up his hands and Chris' chest. He knew he couldn't heal Chris but he hoped that maybe he could stave off the end if he tried hard enough. The healing did seem to have some affect as Chris seemed to breath a little bit easier and his words came out smoother. "Thank you, but I'm not the little brother you grew up with. You aren't helping him by trying to save me. You understand that, don't you?"
"It's not him that I want to save, Chris. He's fine. I love him more than life. But you have to remember that I am that eight year old little boy who just left this room. That little boy spent months looking up to and idolizing an awesome Whitelighter, then found out that that Whitelighter was actually his Witchlighter brother. But this great brother that he was beginning to truly care for went and did something stupid like die for him. Doesn't that give you a hint as to why I would want to come back and save you?" Wyatt had reached out to softly stroke his brother's forehead as he spoke and Chris did not pull away from the comforting motion. It had been so long since he had felt anyone try to comfort him that he couldn't deny how good the touch felt. And he did understand where Wyatt was coming from too. He had to admit that.
"Okay, you win. If Dad comes back and can heal me, you can tell them," he whispered but a large part of him didn't think that his father had a chance in hell of saving him, but he'd at least humor his brother until he died and besides, at that moment he would do nearly anything to keep his brother with him, comforting him until the end.
Wyatt smiled knowing in his heart that their father would stop at nothing to save Chris now that he suspected the truth and even if he were not sure, Phoebe would surely figure it out from the emotions she had felt earlier.
But he didn't mention any of this to his brother as he crawled onto the couch behind him with Chris' head resting on his leg. He continued to run his hand through the hair on Chris' forehead, which he knew from years of experience would sooth the fear and tension away from him. There had been many nights in his childhood where he had woken to Chris' cries in the night from the nightmares left behind from the years he had spent underground and the experience of watching another version of himself die before his very eyes. The only one who ever seemed able to comfort him from that day forward had been Wyatt. Wyatt often expected that the fact that his family had let older Chris die in his version of time had had a seriously adverse affect on how much the child felt he could trust them. But that was gonna change. Wyatt had made sure of it. Chris would not die this time around and his family would not be broken anymore.
Piper had just finished tucking her sons into bed and had closed the door to the bedroom leaving them bunked together in Wyatt's bed. Wyatt had insisted that his brother would feel safer with him and she had made sure to set up a perimeter of crystals to keep them safe herself. She thought that she might lie down on her own bed and try to get a little rest herself. It had been a very emotional day and her entire body felt as if it would soon give out.
But it wasn't long before she realized that she would never get any sleep as long as she worried about her sons, not to mention the nagging feeling that there was a realization that her husband had come to that she just couldn't grasp on her own at the moment, so she made her way back to their room intent on sleeping in the rocker that had been there since Wyatt was a baby. But as she very easily cracked the door open, so as not to wake the boys, she heard voices coming from the room.
"Their not gonna let him die. I know they won't," Wyatt said his voice full of conviction.
"But they don't love him like they do you and me," the younger boy answered back. "Why?"
"They just don't know who he is yet. It's not their fault. They'll change their minds when my older self tells them the truth. You'll see," Wyatt said hoping that he was right. Wouldn't Mommy and Daddy love Chris too if they knew he was their son?
"I wish that I'd never promised to keep it a secret. They hate him so much, and it hurts him a lot. I can feel it because of our link, but now that he's shut the link down I don't feel anything anymore and I can't hear him talking or see what he sees. It's almost scarier this way. It felt good most of the time. Like I was never alone. What if something happens and he dies? I won't even know." The boy had started crying when he uttered the last words.
Piper blinked a few times not believing what she had just heard. If what her son said was true then that could mean only one thing… but her thoughts were interrupted as Wyatt spoke again. "It's okay. I'm still linked with my older version. He's trying to heal Chris, so he'll last till Daddy can kill the demon. I'll know if the worst happens… But it won't. Chris will live and then the other Wyatt will tell them all the truth and you can quit pretending. I can stop calling you "kid" and call you by your real name. It will only be a little confusing till our older selves go back to their time."
"Wyatt, I'm glad you're my brother," the boy said snuggling deeper into the covers.
"I'm glad too, Chris, and I promise, I'll never let anyone hurt you again," Wyatt vowed wrapping one arm protectively around his little brother never realizing that their words had reached the ears of their mother just outside the door.
Piper slowly closed the door and then sunk back against the wall behind her as her knees gave way below her and she slid to the floor. She placed both hands over her mouth trying to stave off any sound that might escape her lips and warn her sons of her presence as she stared at the carpet between her feet and tried to force back the feeling of vertigo. "Chris…" she whispered weakly into her hands as teardrops slowly formed in the corners of her eyes and then trailed down her cheeks. She tried to grasp the fact that the young man who was lying in her attic, possibly dying, was actually her son and he had sacrificed his life to save his brother. "Oh god, Chris…" she said again as a sob escaped her lips and she wrapped one arm around her middle as an immense pain shot through her from her heart down her body and out each limb. She knew it wasn't anything actually physically wrong with her, not unless a breaking heart could really kill someone but the pain was just as real for her.
Then all of the harsh words and cruel actions of the past few months came creeping back into her mind and the sobs became worse as she tried to bite them back so she wouldn't alert her sons of her pain. "What did I do to my son?" she cried hitting the back of her head against the wall behind her several times as if the physical pain might pull her away from the emotional turmoil she felt inside.
After several moments she managed to convince herself that her breakdown would serve none of them and she had to stop it before she became lost to it, so she forced herself to stand and wiped her eyes as she made her way slowly up the stairs to the attic on shaky legs.
Leo had orbed to the back room in P3, which was where Paige had taken Phoebe. The older of the two sisters was sitting on the couch with her head down and was clinging to a pillow that belonged to Chris. She had it clutched tightly to her chest as if she were holding him trying to will the life into him. She hadn't said anything to Paige yet, now only slightly in control of her emotions.
When Leo appeared she looked up and the look on her face begged him to tell her that Chris was still alive. "If we want to save Chris, we have to find Barbas so I can kill him," he said without any hesitation. "Wyatt says that his lair is near the Necromancer's. Paige, you've gotta show me where to go." He didn't include Phoebe in the statement realizing that she was in no shape to go anywhere with them.
"Okay, hon. I can do that. You'll be okay, Sis?" Paige asked Phoebe with some concern.
Phoebe's eyes never left Leo's. "I'll be fine, but Leo you need to know…"
But he cut her off. "I already know, Phoebe. Chris is my son. Or at least I'm ninety nine percent sure that he is."
Paige's eyes widened severely. "Holy Mother... That's what he's been hiding?"
Phoebe and Leo both nodded simultaneously and Leo sighed seeing that she had confirmed what he already knew. "I can save him, but we have to go now."
Paige immediately grabbed his arm and they orbed away, leaving Phoebe where she was. All this time, she should have sensed it, somehow. She had begun to sense Chris' turmoil recently. All the signs were there. Why hadn't she done something about it? "God, Chris, I'm so sorry," she cried burying her face in the pillow which smelled of his aftershave and the smell only served to remind her of how much she had failed him. "Please don't die."
Piper stopped at the attic doorway as she glanced inside to see the sight that her sons made together. 'Her sons' she thought sadly to herself. She had had months now with Chris so near to her and she had wasted all the time she could have spent getting to know the real him. She had wasted that time on mistrust and anger. And now that she knew who he was and was ready to accept him time was the one luxury that it seemed they didn't have. Not unless Leo could find a way to save him. "Please, Leo, save our son," she whispered to the heavens and then moved into the room catching the attention of her oldest son.
"Hey, Mom," Wyatt called out to her, alerting Chris of her presence.
He had been lying silently trying to conserve his strength but his brother's words brought his attention back to them as he turned his head to face her.
He didn't speak but watched in fascination as Piper walked hesitantly towards them and kneeled on the floor in front of him. She smiled up at Wyatt and he could see the redness that blotched the skin around her eyes. This made him wonder just what she had been crying about. Then she turned to look at Chris memorizing all of the lines of his face wondering why she had never seen her youngest son's features in the young man that had invaded their lives from the future. "Hey, Chris. How ya feeling?" she asked quietly reaching one hand out and laying it on his arm softly.
He grinned lopsidedly and then winced as a streak of pain constricted his chest. Piper's grip on his arm tightened slightly and she prayed the pain would pass soon. Once it did Chris looked at her again and breathed out quietly, "Been better."
"I imagine you have," she whispered returning his grin with a weak smile. "Chris…" she began but wasn't exactly sure what to say. "I need…" she tried again but that didn't sound right either. "You see…" Oh hell, why was it so hard to ask him the simple question?
The look in his eyes became worried as he guessed at what she might be trying to say. No, how could she know? Had Wyatt said too much? He felt a cold chill run up his spine and his face flushed slightly as knots of anxiety formed in his stomach adding to the discomfort he already felt.
Piper could see the anxiety written across his face and realized that it was she who was causing it. She didn't want to do that to him. She wanted him to be happy that she knew who he was. "Chris, please, don't get upset. I don't want you to be afraid," she whispered reaching up and smoothing the hair off his forehead trying to smooth the lines of worry she saw there. "I heard the young ones talking a moment ago. They didn't know I could hear them."
For just a moment Chris had reveled in the feel of her cool fingers against his hot brow but her words sent another bolt of fear through him and he wanted to cringe away from her. Her actions seemed so kind but what if it was just a ploy to get him to admit it? Would his mother really do something like that? The mother he had grown up with wouldn't have, but this wasn't that woman. This was the woman who had grown to hate him fiercely over the last few months. "Please, don't…" he finally managed to press through his trembling lips as the tears began to form in the corners of his eyes again.
Piper immediately saw the anguish he was feeling over what she said and knew she had to put his mind to rest. "Sh… shh… Chris. It's okay. No need to cry," she pleaded reaching out and wiping his tears away as they started to fall from his eyes. "I don't hate you, and I'm not even mad at you anymore, just please tell me the truth. Are you my son? Are you that little boy that I've fallen in love with over the past few weeks?" At those words Piper's eyes too started to tear up and she couldn't stop the tears that slid down her own cheeks thinking of all the pain her child was in.
Chris wanted to deny it. To keep the pain away from his heart, but how could he? How could he stare into his mother's tear stained face and lie to her denying that he was hers?
Wyatt had listened to the conversation quietly and was watching both of their reactions to it. He knew the turmoil his brother was in, but he could also see his mother's pain written clearly across her face. He looked again to Chris and tried something he wasn't sure would work. He and the Chris from his own time had always shared a mental link that allowed them to communicate with each other and he used it now hoping that this Chris would also be able to hear him. "Chris, tell her the truth. She won't reject you. Look at her face. She wants it to be true. Even I can see that."
Even though Chris had never shared that type of connection with the Wyatt from his time he still was able to pick up on the link and hear his brother's words. His face never left his mother's as he responded to the quiet plea. "I want that to be true. You can't imagine how much I want it, Wy. But what if you are wrong? After everything that has happened it doesn't seem right to expect her to care for me."
"Doesn't seem right?" Wyatt's voice nearly blared in his head. "Chris, what is so wrong about you wanting to be loved by your mother? What is so wrong about you wanting to have a family that cares about you? It's the most right thing in the world. Let her love you, Chris, for both your sakes."
Chris sighed heavily hearing his brother's words and continued to stare into his mother's eyes. "I'm sorry... Mom," he finally breathed out as the tears streamed down his face and he felt the sobs begin to wrack his body again. "I didn't… want to lie to you… I was too… afraid." His words came out between the sobs he could no longer hold back.
Piper shook her head back and forth vigorously not wanting him to feel any shame in what he had done and then leaned into him wrapping her arms around his torso loosely so she wouldn't hurt him. "It's okay, baby. It's okay. Don't cry. I understand," she tried to sooth him through her own tears as she felt him trembling in her arms.
Chris reached up with weakened arms very slowly and wrapped them around her, enjoying the comfort she was offering. After several long moments of them just holding each other Piper pulled back so she could see his face. She stared into those crystal green eyes and saw the love her son felt for her and couldn't believe she had missed it being there before. How could someone hide that much overwhelming love from her? But for now she needed to worry about boosting her son's spirits until his father returned. "Chris, you are going to make it through this. Your father won't let you down."
Chris felt another shot of pain go through his chest at that. Leo had never been a father to him. Not a real father. Not the type of father he wanted him to be. How could he? "But he doesn't even know, Mom. I don't think he can."
Piper just smiled at him remembering the look on Leo's face just before he left. "I'd be surprised if he didn't know, Chris. But even if he doesn't, Leo started being concerned for you not long after your younger self entered our lives. He'll save you. I know he will."
Chris was very surprised to hear those words. Sure he had seen the way his father had begun to act around him for a short while there. But ... "He hates me.." he choked out sadly.
"Chris, there is a very thin line between love and hate and it's not hard to feel both emotions for the same person," Piper explained knowing how easy it was to go from hate to love in just a matter of minutes. "Look at me. I hated you for a while there, but only because I got it all wrong. I didn't understand what you were doing here. Now I understand and I love you for a million reasons. For everything you've done for your family, for the sacrifices you've made for us and for your brother, for who you are."
Chris nodded understanding the position she was in but still afraid that things might not go that well with Leo. His mother in the future had always loved him and accepted him, but Leo was a completely different story.
A/N: Ah, wonderful tearful mother and son moment there. I hope you all enjoyed. Yes, I know Chris is still dying. I'll get to that soon. I promise.