Sleep well my Angel
For the first time in a long time I had a dream of love not terror. The sun woke me as always. I tried to cling to the last wisps of sleep, but eventually with a sigh I slid from under Ciel and went to the bathing room. I bathed then put on a pretty lilac dress. Faint smells of seasonings met my nose from the kitchen. Amelia must be getting an early start. I headed downstairs to lend Melia my help as I did every morning. The lavish manor seemed brighter than usual, perhaps it was simply because of the sun's position in the sky. I sung a little nursery rhyme from my childhood.
"Little Tommy tinker sat on a clinker he began to cry, Ma! Ma! Poor little innocent guy." I sung it in different tones and pitches.
"Singin' again? I thought I'd ne'er 'ear it!" Amelia said leaving the kitchen. Her fire red hair was pulled up in a low bun partially covered by the little maid's hat she wore. Her uniform was a deep green like the forest, her apron brown.
"I do regret not finishing my lessons."
"You were unable. You should talk to the Master."
I gave her look. Did she really think I wanted to ask him for anything?
"Right..." She said remembering the predicament.
"Need help with anything?"I asked
"Um...no I just finished."
"Oh my apologies for not being of help."
"Aye now it isn't yer job." She smiled. Melia always had a joyful air about her. She was the more maternal of the three servants," last night Vincent said we'd be havin' a dinner guest. Did you know?"
"No, but you know I am never allowed to attend these things." Any other day I might have been upset about this, but today I couldn't care less.
"You had fun yesterday didn't ye."
"More than I'd like to admit." I smiled looking down a bit.
She laughed excitedly,"Oh little seeds of romance!"
I rolled my eyes and rubbed my hand through my hair. Romance was a bit much. Dex was simply my way out of this hell hole.
"I wonder how the Master will deal with that?" She said thoughtfully.
"He'll find someone else to depend on, like his wife." I said indignantly. Vincent is not my child. I was not made to serve him.
Amelia gave me a look that read "really?"
"It isn't my fault he chose a woman who leaves when he needs her." My voice was haughty and mean,"is it not time that I did something without worrying about that man. He isn't my husband. I'm not his to use."
"You're right! Oh it's just that I've come to hope that one day he'd-"
"Didn't we all. Didn't we all pray for something to come out of this? All that came was free labor for him and a heart of stone for me," I said simply,"I am trying for happiness again. That is all there is to it."
"Camilla!" Isabelle ran in with an arm full of calla lilies.
"Good morning Isabelle." I smiled.
The girl stopped just in front of me with a beaming smile. Here blue eyes glistened as if she knew something enthralling.
"What?" I asked immediately suspicious.
"Oh nothing," she rocked back on here heels and looked down at the lilies. I stared at her knowing she'd crack under pressure. While I waited I noticed that her hair had lengthened. Her auburn locks hung well past her knees and had a mind of its own. The pins in her hair did all they could to keep the too long hair out of her face.
"Isabelle, please tell me your news." I asked growing quickly impatient.
She looked at me swiftly and furrowed her brow. Isabelle looked backed down at her flowers.
"Who said I had news?" She asked softly.
"I suppose no one did," I said. I heard Amelia's departure. Isabelle's hair began to bother me, she would get it all dirty and tangled if she left it down like that. With a resigned sigh I began braiding her hair into a Dutch flower braid.
"Alright I'll tell you. Master is inviting Lord Reed for dinner."
I narrowed my eyes as I braided her hair.
"Is that so?" I asked in a pleasant voice. What the hell was Vincent up to?
"Mmhm I heard them on the phone last night. The best part is master said you can attend dinner!"
I was silent. I knew Vincent, he didn't do things just to be nice. He always had some sort of motive.
"Isn't that great?!" She turned around and grinned at me.
"Yes, yes excuse me for not jumping for joy. It's hard to jump in heels. Now let me finish."
She turned back and sighed,"Cami you're always so sour."
"I suppose that's why I have such a sweet tooth." I kissed her cheek and she giggled. I pinned the hair made flower then moved to stand in front of her.
"Would you like assistance in arranging the flowers?"
"Yes please," she chimed.
I poked her nose and went to go get some vases. I came back to see Isabelle dancing around the foyer singing her favourite song from her home, Tarantello.
I smirked and joined in while placing vases on the tables around the manor. I made my way about the manor until I was done then got water to fill the vases. Isabelle worked behind me placing four or five lilies in a vase. We hooked arms and spun each other about and she split the bundle of flowers giving me some. We danced and sang our merry little song and when all of the lilies were in a vase. We danced in the middle of the foyer.
Tanaka cleared his throat.
"Ah, come on old man. Join us!" I said while twirling about with Isabelle.
"I will do nothing of the sort," he said lifting his nose in the air a bit,"Master would like to see you."
I stopped dancing, all feelings of merriment left my body.
"Of course he does." I murmured.
I quickly stomped upstairs, sniffing out the dirty dog. He was in his room. Of course he was in his room. What better place to take a lady than your fucking room! I stopped outside of his door. I just stood there for a moment, clenching and unclenching my fists. It was simple, I'd barge in there demand that he tell me what he wants then, once I know leave. If he wants anything from me, the answer is no. I do not answer any of his questions, especially about Dex. As far as Vince knows I like Dex. As far as the servants know, I like Dex. Dex is a pawn, simply means of getting away from this hell. No one is to know that but me...And maybe Tanaka. That's besides the point. Right now I'm going to burst in and tell Vince what for.
I bursted in,"Vincent you have some nerve doing what you did last night and inviting Dex to dinner today. I ought to eat your soul right here and know!" I yelled.
He was sitting at the far corner of the room sitting by the window drinking tea. The sun shone against him. He did not look at me, but out the window. He glared with cold indifference.
"Aye do you hear me?!" I yelled.
"How could I not? Why don't you give it a rest? Last night and today was a favor to you. A favor of in which you are paying back rather poorly."
"A favor?"
"You rejected me, which means you've grown up enough to see past lust. Today I want to see what Dex feels for you. I won't let you fall into the hands of just anyone."
I froze, my idea of being assertive and mean faded.
"What?" I asked. I could feel my face go blank in confusion.
"Millie, I promised I'd protect you. I don't want the same result as your last marriage. I want you to be happy, and maybe have a child of your own."
I didn't know what to say to that. I just stared at Vincent. He smiled at me.
"A promise is a promise, especially one to your father," he said standing. He walked towards me and I took a step back.
"It only took you ten years to hold up to your word," I sneered.
"Better late than never."
"How about too little too late?! I won't let you do this to me, Vince."
He stood right in front of me and crossed his arm. His expression was amused, the arch of his brow haughty and indignant.
"Do what?" He asked arrogantly.
"I won't let you weasel your way back in my heart, you filthy wretch!" I stared spitefully at his chest. I couldn't look him in the eyes knowing I would crumble.
"I don't have to weasel my way back in, Millie," he brushed the hair, that fell in front of my face, behind my ear,"I am always there whether you like it or not. You are their in my heart too, no matter how little I think of you," as he spoke he brought his face closer to mine. Staring in to the midnight of his eyes I felt my fire cool. I immediately turned from him, my body facing the door. I should go. I should leave and finish out my day.
"Vincent, you are right, you will never have to weasel back in to my heart for you have become moss growing on a statue, but I am not in your heart...No...if I was, you'd care that each day I become a little more lost...No I am not in your heart. Even though I've protected you, cared for you, and would die for you...I am not in your heart. With that being said, do not be surprised if one day you are not in mine...one day I'll scrape the moss off of my stone..." I meant to leave after these words. I honestly did but he touched my scars.
"I thought eventually these would heal, so the beautiful color of your skin would come back. It's my favorite color, you know. It reminds me of safety. But the honey...or is it more like caramel...perhaps a nice caramel sunset...it will never go back. No, after numerous meals the scars have lightened...but somehow I don't think they'll go anywhere. That saddens me. I don't want anymore scars upon your heart or your skin, they're both too beautiful to take such abuse. Let me keep that from happening again. I just want to protect you, like you've protected me all of these years." My breath caught as he stuck a folded paper in my bust. I ignored it easily.
"I don't need that any more, Vincent. I needed that years ago before I was scarred and when you called me a stupid ungrateful little girl who should be happy anyone chose to put up with me." I left the room.
Despite my words, deep down...I know I believe him. I also know I shouldn't, but I do. I believe because it makes me feel less alone. Vincent slayed my mood. I went to my room and lie on my bed.
How many years would I spend like this? Would I ever leave? My stomach growled hungrily. It had been a while since I fed. I took the paper from my bust and opened it. Bless him, there were names written. Unfortunately, Vincent only liked me feeding at night. I would have to wait until after supper. I sighed and rolled over.
"Camilla!" Isabelle called from outside of my door.
"Yes, my little pasta monster," I called.
She entered,"You know that is a harsh stereotype. Just because I'm Italian doesn't mean I like pasta," she fussed.
I turned to look at her with a quizzical expression, "So you don't like pasta?"
"Of course I like pasta, I'm Italian," she said flippantly. I smiled at her,"Look I found a bunny!" She exclaimed and flopped on my bed.
"Is that so," I sat up.
She petted the little grey ball of fur.
"Ve I found him in the garden eating the carrots."
I smiled,"Well isn't that stereotypical."
"We're two stereotypical peas in a pod." She hugged the little creature.
The thing was surprisingly calm for its predicament.
"Don't let Melia see the poor guy, she'll make him into a stew."
She squeaked,"oh no he's so cute!"
"I think he'd be delicious," I smiled, feigning a grab for the little guy.
"No, Cami! That's cruel! He has a name! You can't eat it once it has a name!" She cried frantically, moving away from me.
"Not true his name could be dinner," I joked.
"His name isn't Dinner."
"Oh then what is it?" I challenged.
"Um," she rocked back on her heels,"his name is...Sir...Fluffy Bottom."
I rose an eyebrow,"Sir Fluffy Bottom?" I asked skeptically.
"Do not question the royal name!" She said turning her nose in the air.
"Oh I am in the presence of royalty, well forgive me Sir Fluffy Bottom," I bowed my head.
"That is Prince Fluffy Bottom to you,"she tsked. Isabelle laughed and sat back down beside me.
"Well what do you plan to do with the Prince?"
"I'm going to love him and hug him."
"And never give it a moment of rest." I added.
"No, that's not true."
"I know it is, because when you found that kitten, the little creature never got any sleep. It died of exhaustion!"
"No, it died of old age."
I shook my head and fell back on my bed.
"Whatever," I laughed. My stomach then mimicked the sound of a whale's mating call.
"Oh, you're hungry. I'm sure Melia," Isabelle began.
I shook my head,"It's not that kind of hunger."
"Oh, has Vincent not-"
"No he gave me a paper this morning, but I have to wait until nightfall."
"Ah, I see. Will you be alright around Lord Reed?"
I sat up and opened my arms to her, she came and sat on my lap.
"I will be quite alright."
Eventually, Isabelle had to go back to work and ciel woke up.
"Millie," the boy began while I buttoned his shirt.
"Yes, sweetheart?"
"You would be a really good mother," he said with a small smile.
"I was once, I had a little girl." I was in the habit of telling the young Lord the truth and all of it.
"What happened to her?"
"I lost her," I looked in to his big blue eyes and gave him a sad half smile.
"Well you should go find her!" He said passionately.
My smile widened and I shook my head,"oh my sweet boy things don't work that way," I looked down,"No I'm afraid once something is truly lost...You can never get it back."
"That's sad."
"Yeah. How about we go to the garden and play?" I smiled.
He nodded.
"Yeah? We'll have a real adventure." I tied his shoes then stood. I took his hand and led him to the garden. The weather was fair with a slight breeze, that blew my hair in my face.
"Can we go to the pond?" Ciel asked.
I looked down at his sweet face. He looked every bit like his father when he was little and acted like him also.
"Of course," I answered.
He let go of my hand and ran ahead of me. I followed closely behind him.
I sat by the pond with him until lunch time and after lunch I read him Hamlet in all the voices he loved. At around 3 Vincent entered the parlor.
"Ciel, your mother and I are going to town for a bit, would you like to come along?"
Ciel looked to me as if for permission.
"Go, if you want to." I said and nudged him forward. He ran to Vince and grabbed his hand.
"Camilla would you like anything?" Vincent asked.
"No, have fun."
With that they left. I could hear the horses prance down the drive.
I went to my room, grabbed my candy and settled in with a good book. Tales of horror and gore filled my mind. The delicate art of writing had always intrigued me. I had tried my hand at it, but no one ever read it. I suppose it would be something I left to my successor.
"Oh Camilla still reading that foolhardy nonsense. What is it? A thrilling romance."
I stiffened and turned my head slowly.
"The work of Edgar Allan Poe." I said in a dead voice.
"Well I suppose it isn't trash after all. I'm glad you've finally given up the romance business. That got you no where. It just ruined your pretty skin."
"Mother, how may I help you?" I asked sitting up and facing her.
My mother is a woman of slight stature, but immense presence. Her power could be sensed even through the weak minds of humans. Her hair is just as dark as mine hanging in loose ringlets to her lower back. She was clad in a royal purple jacket and skirt with a black undershirt. Her skin was the same light reddish brown as me, though I might be a tad lighter. Her eyes were piercing violet, no one stared in to her eyes for too long, except for me. I met her gaze without wavering. My coal eyes barely took notice to the air of intimidation she was trying to make.
"Well you could start by coming home with me." She answered and sat on my vanity.
"Sorry that's not happening. I really hate to burst your bubble, but I am never coming to that place."
"And what is stopping me from taking you?" She asked putting one long black fingernail to her cheek and tilting her head.
I shrugged and lie back on my bed.
"Ah you're so much more difficult than the other children, that's why you're my favorite." She laughed.
"What an honor." I said sarcastically.
"Oh it is. I've decided you will take my throne."
"Thanks but no thanks."
"Oh come on, are you not weary of being nothing more than a nanny. You have the most promise among my children. You have known the pain humans can cause. You have every right to live comfortably for the rest of eternity."
"But, at the cost of my humanity. Mother, your other children have come bearing the same news. Now they are at the bottom of a river."
"Is that a threat?" Mother growled.
"Oh no, not in the slightest. I was just stating facts," I smiled more to myself than to her.
"I care not about the others, they were mere pawns. Frankly, I'm glad they're dead, but you see Camilla. I've had many children and they have all been less than exceptional, however you, Camilla, exceed expectation. You have control, and power."
"I have control because I have humanity."
"That is great , darling. This humanity of yours, where has it gotten you? You are living off of hand outs from a human, a human that uses you as a very pretty doormat."
"It's better than losing myself to you." I said back.
Mother wouldn't hurt me, she didn't do her dirty work herself.
"Really, taking hand outs from a human is better than being given what you are due, in a place where people respect and worship you?"
"Honestly? No, but I tend to be a bit masochistic."
"What ever you say, dear. If you need me, you know where to find me." And just like that she was gone.
I let out a sigh and closed my eyes.
"Camilla an hour until dinner!" Isabelle yelled.
I jolted up in bed, she burst in.
"You were sleeping! Aye master said to get you ready."
My eyes zeroed in on the corset in her hand.
"Noooo no corsets!" I whined.
"Don't be a baby. Master ordered you look your best."
"Is my figure not good enough."
"No," she said.
I gasped offended.
"Oh you know you have a beautiful figure and there's no need for this thing, but master said..."
"Yeah yeah alright." I stood and took off my day dress,"come on let's do this."
She put the dreaded thing against my midsection. I whined and held the bed post.
"Oh don't be a baby, I wear a corset every day." She began lacing, with her expert and nimble fingers.
"Have you trained yourself to go without breathing?"
"Shallow...breaths," she pulled.
"Ow! Bloody hell you'll squeeze me in to jam!" I yelled at her,"ah! Isabelle! Please!...stop!"
"You are such a baby," she grunted while she pulled the strings.
I screamed in pain as the wretched thing smashed my rib cage.
"Done," she chimed.
I fell to my knees and gasped for breath.
"I can not breathe in this damn thing!"
"Camilla, have you forgotten you don't need to breathe."
"But I like to!"
She rolled her eyes at me,"Come on put on your dress. Master requested that you wear red."
"Fine," I sprawled out on the floor.
Isabelle sighed and walked to my wardrobe.
"You are rather whiney for a demoness."
"Shut up idiot."
She pulled a blood red dress that I, admittedly, loved, but had never worn. The fabric was soft and wrapped around my body perfectly. The dress was not in the least bit modest. My back would be fully covered as would the back of my neck with a collar. The neck line was a revealing decollétte.
"That dress?" I asked feeling the blood flow to my face.
"Yes, it makes you look sexy. Come on we have 45 minutes and I have to do your hair."
"Isabelle I can do this myself."
"I am going to do this because I love you, not just because I was ordered to. I want this to work out for you." She smiled softly.
"Thank you," I stood up and put on the dress. She then put my hair up in a half updo. My hair had a natural loose curl that fell nicely to just under my bust. She tied a red ribbon in the hair held up.
"Make up!" She sung.
"Isabelle!"
"Oh calm down it's just a bit of lipstick."
She used a strawberry lipstick and smiled at me.
"Are you happy?"
"I don't know, are you?"
"No," I answered truthfully.
"Well then, I am not happy either."
"Don't link your happiness to mine."
"How can I help it? I know master is probably up to something...I also know it will probably hurt you. I can only hope Lord Reed has taken a liking to you, and will pursue you no matter what. Mostly I hope you will live comfortably for the rest of your days."
"I won't die...So I can't love him...I can only use him to get out. I can't let myself love him."
"You love me, Amelia, Tanaka, and Ciel. We will also pass..."
"Yes... So why add to the list?"
"Because love is worth it." Her soft smile was sad, and her blue eyes glistened more than usual.
"I'm sorry, you're right," I surrendered seeing how much my feelings hurt her. I touched her face for a moment then hugged her,"Thank you for being a friend. I hope this works out well. I'll definitely take you with me."
"Good, I'm here because and for you," she said.
I let her go with a soft sigh,"How do I look?"
"Beautiful...Oh your eyes," she said in a slightly frightened voice.
"Violet," I nodded,"I'm hungry."
"You will be alright?"
"I've gone hungry longer than this. It will be easy to resist."
"Okay."
I took a deep breath an turned to the mirror. I turned my back to it and lifted my hair. I just wanted to be sure none of my scars were showing.
"Cami the collar covers everything," Isabelle assured.
"Girls, Lord Reed has arrived. Isabelle is she ready," Tanaka called from outside the door.
"She is ready," Isabelle called back.
I listened to this but I stared at the reflection of the girl in the mirror. Her eyes they were of the monsters of lore. I couldn't help but feel saddened by her. Nevertheless I lifted my head and squared my shoulders.
"You are beautiful, chamomile," I smiled at the silly nickname father had for me,"who you are is defined by what you do."
I turned and looked at Isabelle. She was crying.
"Hey, no don't do that," I rushed over to her.
"I'm sorry," she hugged me tightly,"you deserve so much better." Isabelle swiftly left the room. I followed her and meandered down the halls to the foyer. My nerves were frayed, mood shattered, spirit all but broken; I hummed to myself to calm and soothe my aching stone.
I could hear them speaking of me downstairs, especially Rachel.
"Oh, she can be mean spirited I fear to ask her of anything."
I scoffed at that and rolled my eyes.
"Millie is always nice to me," Ciel chimed. I couldn't help but smile.
"Is that so?," Dex asked, there was a pause, I suppose Ciel nodded," Camilla takes care of you?" Another pause,"What do you all do?"
"Millie and I play, talk, read, and sometimes she sings to me."
"Camilla sings?"
"Like an angel!" He exclaimed.
"Now, now, quiet Ciel. You'll bother the man." Rachel spoke. Her voice on the surface was sweet but I could hear the undercurrent of annoyance.
"He is no bother, in fact I enjoy the conversation. It seems like Ciel here spends the most time with the lady in question. So, Ciel, would you say that Camilla is a good person?"
"Well, mister, Millie always says there is no such thing as a good person, but relative to others...Millie is as good as it gets."
"Ciel you might be biased," Vincent rebuked,"quiet now."
I chose this moment to descend the stairs.
"Vincent, if Ciel is to be a strong man he must be able to formulate and opinion. If you constantly rebuke him he'll become soft spoken and timid. Those are two things a Phantomhive can never be," I said simply.
"Camilla how nice of you to join us," Vincent said.
I smiled softly,"Is it really, or are you humoring our guest. No one thought it nice before I came, but dear Ciel and perhaps Dex."
"Mal tempered," Rachel murmured.
"I lack the ability to put up false pretenses or lie about who I am, I also refuse to wear a mask. If that makes me mal tempered then so be it," I shrugged looking pointedly at Rachel," Though I do apologize to Dex that he was received by such gossiping folk. My father used to say, if you haven't any thing nice to say, don't say anything at all."
I stepped down from the last step and smiled at Dex.
"Ah Dex, what a treat to see you again," I walked to him and offered my hand which he kissed automatically,"I am sorry my dear Reed...but I haven't much experience with welcoming guests, nor have I ever dined with them. I am usually excluded from these festivities."
"Do not apologize," he smirked and looked into my eyes. The glimmer in his eyes made it seem like he knew what I was doing. Could he know that I was only acting this way as ruse? If he did, how did he know? Did he know that I never would have brought up my lack of dining with Vincent and Rachel? Could he tell how uncomfortable this whole situation made me?
"Camilla, it was only because we feared bothering you. You work so hard, and without cause," Vincent said.
I didn't even look at him I simply answered coldly, "Oh how generous of you."
Dex kept a hold of my hand and my eyes. I couldn't look away from the pale mint green of his eyes.
"Dinner is ready, we may go into the dinning room." Vincent said a bit loud for the setting but designed to grab my attention. Vincent lead the way grabbing Rachel's hand. Ciel broke free from Rachel and came to me.
"You look really beautiful, Millie, but...what's the stuff on your face?" He asked with a slight frown.
"It's silly gunk Isabelle painted on my face." I smiled and bent to his height.
"It's still pretty...just different."
"Ciel come on," Rachel called.
Ciel followed quickly.
"Shall we," Dex asked.
"I suppose," I smiled.
We followed the Phantomhives in to the dinning room. The table was set most grandly. I would have to congratulate Tanaka on this. The silver shined, plates glistened, and the table cloth was set without a wrinkle or imperfection. I spotted Isabelle standing by the wall she gave me a wide smile and I thumbs up. I smirked then looked up at Dex, curious as to how he was taking all of this in. However, when I looked at him he was staring at me. I immediately looked away and down, feigning bashfullness. Rachel and Vincent sat at the heads of the table, Ciel sat on one side, Dex and I sat at the other. Dex pulled out my chair for me and I sat, he then took his place beside me. I sat closer to Vincent than to Rachel.
Tanaka, Amelia, and Isabelle moved gracefully about the table putting down platters of food and unveiling them. I was in the habit of thanking the three for everything they did, which gained me odd looks from Dex and Rachel. I don't care though, I refuse to treat them differently because I'm around nobility. Dinner smelled absolutely delicious, but sadly it didn't appeal to me. No, the two males at this table appealed to me. I took a peek at Dex. His skin was Sun tanned, not severely so, but enough to show he enjoyed being outside. Perhaps, he hunted, or did some sort of sport.
Vincent was the first to start conversation.
"Dex, you may consider it rude for asking, but why have you decided to court our young Porter widow." He asked.
I clenched my jaw, Vincent knew I hated the name Porter. I saw to it that every legal paper of mine said my maiden name.
"I find her..." He paused looking for the right words,"enthralling and interesting."
"Is that so?" Vincent smirked. He had a mean look in his eye that I dreaded. I stared down at the food. I had gotten salmon, with a spinach leaf salad. It was all I had asked for, because it was all I could eat. The hearty beefs and porks made me feel heavy and tired, and I needed to feed tonight.
"Is that amusing?" Dex asked. His tone was respectfully challenging. I glanced up at him to see him leaning towards Vince. My mind suddenly wondered, how much had he heard of me, while I was in that mausoleum?
"Yes, in fact it is. Our Camilla is a woman of many secrets, ones you couldn't fathom."
"Is that not the point of courting, to find out secrets?"
I stiffened a bit.
"Some secrets she will not let you now," Vincent said in a snake like tone. I turned my head slowly from my food to Vincent. I pleaded with him with my eyes, begging him to let it go. His smirk widened when he saw this and I scowled and looked back at my food.
"That just adds an air of mystery, what fun is a lady who is an open book. It makes her bland, run of the mill, intellectually dead."
"Is that so?"
"That is the way I feel."
I picked up my fork and began eating small pieces of salmon.
"You are a peculiar man. Not only are you thinking of marrying a widow, but also an illegitimate daughter. An illegitimate daughter who's mother is a..." I could feel his eyes on me and I was sure to be as relaxed as possible,"Native, to the Americas."
If Vincent ruined this for me, surely I would kill his Rachel. His dear precious Rachel. Then we'd both be widows, widows who caused the deaths of their spouses.
"Peculiar man I am indeed," he said in a manner that quieted even Vincent. He was so sure, and impassive. Vincent's stabs at me barely phased Dex, his opinion didn't seem to waver.
There was a silence where only the sound of the consumption of food was heard. I took a large drink of wine. After a few more moments it was Ciel who spoke.
"Mother," he called she didn't even blink. He called a few times before he looked to me in distress. In public, Ciel was to call on his mother not me for help, to give the illusion that she was the care taker. Normally I would let him keep calling her, mostly because I didn't have a choice, but I knew that look.
I stood immediately and went around the table to Ciel's side.
"Excuse us," I murmured then took Ciel's hand.
I took him to the restroom and listened to the conversation that blossomed in my absence.
"Camilla is not the girl you think she is,"Vincent spoke.
I stood against the wall of the bathroom while I waited for Ciel to be done.
"Might I make an observation?" Dex asked, there was something in his voice, was it irritation.
"Go ahead," Vincent answered.
"You say these things about her when she is not in the room so blatantly. Is she not supposed to be your friend?" He asked.
"It is because I am her friend that I can say such things."
"Oh, but the girl there standing by the far wall her face says different. You young lady step forward."
My hands clenched in to fist. Isabelle had been standing on the far wall.
"Millie, I'm done" Ciel called.
I immediately started to clean him up.
"Yes, sir," I heard the Italian accent and wanted to punch something.
"Are you friends with Ms. Camilla?"
"Yes," she said without hesitating.
"And is she anything they say her go be?"
"She has never shown, unkindness to me," she said softly.
I hurried back to tell dinning room with Ciel in tow.
"Are you calling us liars then?" Rachel asked.
I picked up Ciel and ran.
"Um," Isabelle began.
"She said nothing of the sort!" I all but yelled. They all looked at me and I set Ciel down. And he went to his seat.
I touched Isabelle's shoulder a silent signal for her to leave, she hurried in to the kitchen.
I took my place next to Dex.
"Dex, I am Camilla's friend. I don't want to see her hurt, because a man was driven by lust and not true attraction. I will tell you now that she is barely suitable for a man like you. You who have never seen the darkness this world holds. You who could not understand her pain if you tried. You who could not understand what she-"
"Vincent," I said staring at him with more hatred than I had ever felt towards him.
"She's a peach that fell off the tree, and was bruised." Vincent concluded.
Rachel chuckled and that was it. I jumped up knocking my chair down. I looked dead into Vince's eyes.
"Do you not mean the peach that was plucked off and thrown to the ground only to have everyone step on it? I didn't make it happen nor was it some simple law of nature! It was the cruelty of man! Vincent maybe he won't understand these things about me, but is it not up to me to explain, to say my part of the story, without you wagging your spade tongue! I thought you were doing this to help me! I should have known better." I clenched my jaw and noticed Ciel staring at me surprised. I calmed and picked up my chair,"Forgive me, Dex, Ciel," I apologized to the two, "Excuse me," I left quickly. I went out in to the gardens and took deep breaths. I wanted to kill something. The spring breeze blew threw my hair and into my lungs but it did not blow away my rage.
Father's lullaby came to mind and I sung it as loudly as I could.
" Sing a song of sixpence, pocket full of rye
Hush-a bye my baby, no need to be crying.
You can burn the midnight oil with me
As long as you will
Stare out at the moon
Upon the windowsill, and dream...
Sing a song of sixpence, pocket full of rye
Hush-a bye my baby, no need to be crying.
There's dew drops on the window sill,
Gumdrops in your head
Slipping into dream land,
You're nodding your head, so dream...
Dream of West Virginia, or of the British Isles
'Cause when you are dreaming,
You see for miles and miles.
When you are much older, remember when we sat
At midnight on the windowsill,
And had this little chat
And dream, come on and dream,
Come on and dream, and dream, and dream...
(Midnight Lullaby Tom Waits)"
I hummed the tune a bit longer as my anger slowly subsided.
"That was a beautiful song."
I laughed,"You're still here? I thought Vincent might have scared you off."
"He's just a man who wishes to discredit you, to keep you. I don't believe a word of it and neither should you." His jacket was off and the sleeves of his shirt pushed up just at his elbow showing the smooth skin of his forearms.
"I shouldn't? He's known me all of my life, surely he knows a thing or two about me."
"That doesn't mean what he says is true. If he found something he liked-"
"Have you?" I asked smiling and tilted my head.
"Pardon," his mint eyes widened.
"Have you found something you like?" I asked errantly grabbing one of the the locks that had escaped my half updo and twisting it around my finger.
"I've found several somethings, and you?"
"I've unveiled a few treasures." I admitted walking towards him.
"Well good, we'll raise hell for Vincent and Rachel," he smiled brightly. His smile was slightly uneven the side with his dimple went higher than the other. It was an adorable imperfection.
"Hell?" I asked astounded by the declaration.
"Oh Come now, I bit of revenge is due after all they said about you. Nothing gets back at them more, than your happiness and I'm sure Ciel would like to see you smile for a change."
"Ciel?"
"Oh yes you've raised the boy well, he even takes after you a bit."
I was more than a bit confused, caught in the whirl wind of his words.
"Thank you," I managed to say.
"We'll give it a few months, and maybe, if you will still have me, we can marry."
"If you prove to be everything I think you are, there is no 'if' about it."
He took my hand and began walking. He was silent and that was nice. I've always enjoyed a person who doesn't feel the need to fill every second with meaningless chatter. The evening pressed on, and no one bothered us, or maybe they were trying and just could find us. Either way I was content with it. After tonight, I hated Rachel a little more and loved Vincent a little less. Dex had become the queen in my game. A partner in crime more essential than the other pieces. The board was set, and whether Vincent knew it or not the game is on.
I moved closer to Dex and rested my head on his upper arm. He was able bodied, muscular, more than Vincent by a long shot. That confused me. The normal noble would never have need or means to get muscular. Muscles came from need or obsession and nobles had neither. So why was Dex so firm, so strong? Sports? Hunting? Did it matter? I like it. Somehow it makes me feel safe. Marriage, shouldn't prove so bad with him...as long as he didn't change. If he did I would just kill him, and take his fortune. For this is my own game with its own rules. Let the games begin