"Dex I don't know about this," I said in a nervous voice.
"It is alright, they will love you. Just be yourself." He assured.
It has been three days since Vincent and I had our last argument, and when I left this morning he didn't bother speaking to me. I can't deny, that hurts, but what should I expect. I threatened to kill the man...No I promised. Dex's family would be here any minute and I must admit I am truly nervous. This week could make or break my plan. Dex is fond of his mother, and if she strongly dislikes me I can not be sure if Dex will still pursue.
"Camilla it does not matter what happens today, I will still love you." He kissed my forehead and gave me a smile. I returned the smile hesitantly. He laughed and kissed all over my face,"You worry entirely too much Ms. Nightshade."
I laughed and pushed him away,"I can't help it! I want your family to like me."
"As they will, you've already taken the affections of the staff here."
He was right, every staff member simply loved me. I suppose a little kindness goes a long way. The head maid, Anne, frequently fawned over me, calling me the prettiest thing she has ever seen. That was too be expected though. Dex was a kind man, but his friends were never polite to the servants. How can you not love someone that treats you as a person not a slave. Nobles are different, everyone already treats them nicely, they expect it. They also expect me to act like nobility to hold myself a certain way. How do I deal with that?
"You're worrying again," he poked my forehead just between my brows where wrinkles had formed while I furrowed them in thought. He smoothed away the wrinkles and sighed,"I promise, Camilla, it will be alright. Everything will be alright."
He hugged me tightly. I let myself relax in his arms. His sweet smell surrounding and leaving its imprint on me. I looked up at him and nodded.
"Yeah you are right." I said
"Naturally."
"I'll just be me, the best me I can be."
"That's all I ask."
"And if they don't like me,"
"They will."
"If! I said if. Then, I tried, right? That has to count for something."
"It counts for everything." He brushed one of my hairs behind my ear then let his fingers trace my jaw line.
I turned and looked out of the window. We had been lucky to have a bright clear day. No chance of cancellation.
A carriage rode up to the manor and I felt my heart jump into a sprint.
I immediately began smoothing the soft aquamarine dress I wore. The dress was slim and fitted flaring softly at the knee. My back was fully covered and I wore a ribbon around my neck to hide the scars on there. The dress held a modest sweet heart neckline. On the side of my left leg was etched beautiful cherry blossoms. The dress was a gift from Dex. I smoothed my hair readjusting the combs that held it.
"Camilla you look fine." Dex smiled and took my hand leading me to the foyer.
The butler, Arthur, had gotten the door.
"Dexter!" A man maybe a few inches shorter than Dex called opening his arms. His hair was considerably shorter and lighter than Dex's dark, chocolate-brown. His eyes were the same mint though, straighter nose, full pink rose lips, flawless skin. I can see how he'd take a woman from Dex, if she were shallow enough to leave. His ego was an almost tangible force in the room, it somehow sickened me. Dex suddenly grabbed my hand, I looked up at him and smiled.
"Well, who is this lovely lady?" The man, who was obviously Dex's brother asked.
"John, this is Camilla. Camilla, this is John."
"Pleasure to meet you, John." I said with a nod. He took my hand never breaking eye contact, and held it.
"The pleasure is mine," he kissed my hand still looking at me. A girl had fallen for this man? Over Dex? How quaint!
I plastered on a sweet smile and withdrew my hand.
"She is here for the family dinner, I assume you want to marry her." John inquired looking to Dex.
"I do," Dex nodded once his eyes narrowing. I watched Dex clench and unclench his jaw quickly.
"Well, you've found yourself a very fine lady." He smiled at me.
"Please let us go to the sitting room and wait for Mother and father."
Dex towed me off to the sitting room after his brother.
I sat beside him while the brothers talked over health,inquiring what the other had been doing, truly trivial things. From what I gathered John practiced law on the other side of England. He had left his two daughters with their grandparents. They would arrive here with them.
"So, Camilla, what made you fall for my brother here?"
"That's a loaded question," I laughed,"I suppose it was because he took notice of me when everyone else considered me invisible, he's my rock," I said thoughtfully.
"This lad?" John said stunned.
"Why is that so surprising?" I asked tilting my head.
"No reason. I suppose if you enjoy books, and star-gazing opposed to riveting adventure...Then..." he smiled and winked.
"I've come to find that within every star is wonder untold, and every book tells you a wonder. If you can appreciate that then...You're one special person." I looked up at Dex with a reassuring smile. This is what he had been nervous about earlier, that I'd quit him and go for his brother. Preposterous idea, how could I quit him for this egotistical thing.
"I suppose our Dexter's found his match. I'm glad. The family and I had begun to think he'd die alone without a successor. He never was good with ladies."
Dex sighed and I hugged his arm, lying my face against his shoulder.
"Well he's good with me," I resolved.
"Your skin it's peculiar, how long do you stay out in the sun?"
"Oh, my mother is native to the Americas and my father was an Englishman which allowed for my skin to always look a bit tan."
His mouth pulled down at the corners he glared to Dex with an expression I don't understand.
"Father would find that interesting." He smirked, drinking a bit of tea.
"Father finds everything interesting," Dex said in a bored voice.
"Oh right, you don't care what Father thinks, do you? No Mother is who you rely on."
"Precisely, Father is never happy with anything I do so I shall not put myself out to be disappointed. Camilla is a very beautiful person, mother will see that while father will just see a vessel for young." I heard the front door open and close. Five sets of feet walked towards the parlor, one of which belonged to Arthur.
"He's practical," John scoffed.
"He's blind! It's always posterity and prosperity with him!"
"That's what we live on, Dex! You can't just be romantic all the time."
"And why can't he John? If you marry for love, everything will work out fine." A very rich and stately voice spoke from behind me.
I let go of Dex and turned. Dex stood, grabbing my hand .
"Mother," he said with delight. I looked up at him, he smiled widely at his mother. He pulled me with him to stand in front of his family.
Dex's mother was a blond haired blue eyed Angel, with cherry lips and a beautiful smile. The sight of her made me hungry, she was truly beautiful. Her skin was about as pale as snow, and the slight wrinkles by her eyes and parentheses by her mouth were indicators of smiles and laughter. These lines were very faint, surprisingly faint, for this woman had to be at least in her fourties. She looked maybe twenty eight.
"Oh Dexter," she sighed then pulled him in for a hug,"how long has it been?" She sighed.
"A week, mother," Dex laughed.
"A brutal week," she let him go and looked him in the eyes,"You ought to visit more often."
"Eliza, he has to work. You don't want him out in the streets do you?"
She pouted looking up at the man beside her, "No, but he could call."
"Father," Dex nodded holding his hand out.
"Dex," he grabbed his hand and shook it a few times,"you look well. I trust everything has been going fine here, yes?"
"Absolutely."
Dex's Father had a grim face, with a soft smirk. Wrinkles lie on his forehead, from worry, no doubt. He also held a very manly, yet clean shaven, beard and mustache upon his face. His hair is dark, almost black, and eyes a dark green.
Dex turned stiffly from him to two girls, obviously John's children.
"Hello, princesses," he squatted and one immediately hugged him.
"I missed you uncle Dex," a girl with cornsilk hair squealed, her eyes were hazel. Her sweet face was absolutely surrounded with pale blonde, I doubt the girl has ever had a haircut. The blonde mass was held back with a pink ribbon.
"Oh I missed you too, Phoebe." He let her go then looked to the other girl. She has extremely dark hair, which was odd because the two girl were twins...How cold they have such different features? She had big pale blue eyes, another startling attribute.
"Come here," Dex said to her opening his arms. She smiled a soft smile and hugged him.
"It's nice to see you Uncle," she said softly and kissed his cheek. She was the polar opposite of her sister. They seemed like night and day.
I then realized I was being stared at; I turned and saw all eyes were on me. I looked down self conscious.
"Ah Mother, Father," Dex said, standing. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it softly,"This is Camilla. Camilla this is my mother, she'll tell you to call her Eliza, and my father Lord Reed. These two lovely princesses are Phoebe and Selina. John's children."
"Hello, it is pleasure to meet you," I said with a soft smile and curtsy.
"So this is Camilla," Lord Reed, his father, spoke,"small isn't she? Not much to her."
"She is in the room," Dex grumbled.
Lord Reed narrowed his eyes at me. I looked back at him and smiled. Show no fear!
"Camilla, Dex told us about you. I thought he was over stating when he spoke of your beauty." His mother spoke.
"That can hardly be said with you in the room, my lady," I said looking down a bit. Her pale hand went out to me, touching under my chin and lifting my head.
"Call me, Eliza, really." She smiled.
"Alright."
"Come sit," Dex beckoned,"Girls do your thing."
The sisters ran off, I heard Anne greeting them in her soft voice.
I sat beside Dex, sweat pooled in my hands and I wiped them on the fabric of my dress.
"Camilla," Lord Reed called. I looked up at him into suspicious eyes.
"Yes, my Lord?" I spoke evenly.
"What is your last name?" He asked staring at me. I squeezed Dex's hand then closed my eyes and answered.
"Nightshade."
"Of Lord Aaron Nightshade?" He asked staring at me closely.
"Yes, sir. He was my father."
"You're little Annabelle!" He let out a loud laugh.
"Annabelle?" Dex questioned. I opened my mouth to speak but John cut me off.
"Oh have we an alias." John smiled a wicked smile.
"No my-" I began but he cut me off.
"Your plan just fell through doll." He laughed, too loudly for me to be heard if I spoke. Once he was done I glared at him.
"Are you done?" I asked, he nodded leaning forward with a cocky smile,"My middle name is Annabelle, my father along with a few of his friends call me by it. It is not an alias, my given name is Camilla Annabelle Nightshade," I said staring him in the eyes as his mistake set in. I heard Dex chuckle.
"Why you don't remember me little Annie?" Lord Reed asked. I tilted my head a bit. I usually remembered every one and Dex did say his father knew mine, when we ran in to each other at the mausoleum.
"Might I ask your first name?" I asked thinking back
"Oh yes you knew me as Charles." He laughed.
My mind went back to my days of pigtails, bows and frilly dresses. Remembering when Father would teach me about business and he vowed that no one knew business like,
"Charles Charlie!" I laughed,"I do remember," I smiled widely.
"Well you've grown up, not much though."
"You know Camilla," Eliza asked surprised.
"Of course, you remember Aaron don't you, and Rosemary."
"Yes, I didn't know they had a child." She spoke.
"Ah you weren't fond of Rosemary." He patted her shoulder," little Annabelle here is one of the brightest girls I've ever met. She could spot a bad investment from a mile away when she was but a babe. You couldn't have found a better lady, lad."
"I used to call you Mr. Charlie because I couldn't say Charles. Am I allowed to call you that now?" I smiled thinking of the young man he had been in my youth.
"Of course as long as you'll be little Annabelle." He laughed.
I smiled, this would be easier than imagined.
"Well looks like you just won over big bad papa bear," Eliza said looking at me with an odd glint in her eye.
"Now Eliza she's a good girl, don't you scare her off."
I was suddenly very nervous, the silence grew awkward and I feared my head would explode from the odd five seconds of silence. Anne, the elderly maid, saved me.
"My Lord, dinner is ready." She spoke in her soft voice.
When we entered the dining room the girls were already sitting at the table. Dex sat at the head, I to his left, his mother to his right and Mr. Charlie beside her. I sat next to John, next to him Phoebe, and across from her Selina. As servants brought out food I murmured thank you to them and gave small smiles. I noticed the way Eliza scrutinized me. I tried to ignore Dex led grace and I wanted to laugh at my partaking in the formality.
"So Camilla, what is it that you usually do for fun?" Eliza asked.
"Well, I normally read or take a walk in the garden, and when I'm in the mood I sing...or compose." I answered truthfully.
"You compose?" Dex asked.
"It's not any good. I'd be mortified to let anyone hear."
"You're a woman of the arts."
"I suppose you could say so." I nodded. I looked straight in to her eyes.
"So business and the arts."
"It's how my father raised me." I said matter of factly.
"Your father seemed like a wise man." She smiled turning her head a bit.
"Oh he was...He was my best friend." My voice sunk lower, sadder.
"Tell me about him." She leaned forward on her elbows.
"Well, he was everything a person should be. Yes, he made some not so good decisions but that's a part of human folly. He was smart and funny. Father believed in the good of people and never took himself to seriously. He never treated anyone as sub human no matter the status." Speaking about him made me sad so I stopped there and began eating. I suppose she could tell I was done and there was silence.
"Did you do your hair like that?" Selina asked me.
"Yes." I answered looking towards her. Her robin's egg eyes were big.
"Could you do mine like that?" She asked. Selina looked at me hopefully. Her eyes held untainted wonder that I envy. She had never seen death, never dealt it either. She was everything I used to be as a child, before my hunger set in.
"If you wish," I nodded.
"You like children, Camilla?" Eliza asked.
"Of course, I mean who doesn't?" I asked. How could anyone truly despise a child? I can't, they're so...wonderful. Their existence is enough to justify why we were created. I can not despise a child, ever.
"Do you see yourself having many?" She asked.
"Well, I'm not sure what my future holds. However, I am not opposed to the idea of a big family, just as a small family does not repel me either. I'll have as many as I feel I can love and care for properly. "
"Hmm... John how is business going. You were gone longer this time," she said turning her attention from me.
I let out breath I had unconsciously been holding. Dex interlaced his fingers with mine. His hand swallowed mine as they rested on the table. I finished my food and wine staring around the warm lit dining room. The silver trays gleamed as they were bared with lack of food. The boys at the table practicality ate their body weight. Roses and pure white lilies ravished the tables, making the white of the table cloth pop. Arthur and Eustace most have been responsible for this. They are very efficient, not a thing is out of place. The food had been exquisite. I wish I had more of an appetite for it, Anne and Jesse really out did there selves. I might have to get a few recipes from the both of them.
Dex rubbed his thumb against the back of my hand as he held it, still trying to soothe me. I looked away from the lavish room and to him. His face was aglow with a smile as he looked over my head at his brother. John was talking about some hunting trip, exaggerating a bit for the sake of the story. It is obvious that Dex looks up to him, even more than he resents him. I couldn't help smile at the awe in his face and the eagerness in which he asked questions. I looked around at the other people at the table. Mr. Charlie rolled his eyes at a drastic over statement his eldest son just made, he laughed all the same. Eliza smiled indulgently, she shook her hand every now and again, chiding him for being reckless. Selina and Phoebe weren't really paying attention they were making faces at each other and giggling. Lastly I looked at John who was deep in his story, making wide hand gestures, mimicking the bear he had taken down. I couldn't help sparing a laugh or two as I watched him. I have never had anything like this...ever. Yes father and I had dinner, but it's not the same as a whole family. People who banter back and forth without end like John and Dex; I have never had that. Odd, how I wish I did. I wish I'd been fortunate enough to have had a whole family, without death our murder. They are so perfect, right now as they increasingly got louder as one person tried to prove their point over the other. They are absolutely perfect. I looked up to Dex taking in his slightly red face from laughing. He made my small smile widen. I noticed Eliza staring at me out of the side of my eye, she was smirking at me as if she had found what she was looking for. Perhaps her test just ended. I wonder did I pass or fail. Surely Dex would tell me tonight, or tomorrow.
After dinner I sat by the window staring out at the horizon. The sun was far below the tree line but still lingering just at the edge granting a beautiful twilight. John and Dex had decided on a game of cards, Mr. Charlie and Eliza had gone for a walk obviously to discuss me in private,and the twin girls were in the library with me. Going to the library was Selina's idea, Phoebe doesn't care for books all that much. Phoebe ran around the tables and bothered her sister. She whined that Selina never wanted to play. The girls' banter brought a smile to my face.
"Lady Nightshade," Selina called to me in a shy voice.
"You don't have to call me that. You can call me Camilla, or Millie, Cami, what ever feels right to you."
"Millie, could you put my hair up like yours?" She asked. At the moment my hair was up in a flower braid, the style was fairly simplistic, I can do better.
"I'll do you one better, Selina," I smiled at her curious expression. I combed through her hair with my fingers and worked it in to an intricate not, mirroring a Celtic knot. She talked to Phoebe while I did this, explaining exactly why she would rather be a queen than a princess.
"But sister! You get to meet your Prince Charming." Phoebe insisted.
"Boys are stupid," Selina replied.
"Yes, and they're gross and stinky," Dex said entering the library.
Phoebe turned around and pouted at him,"Uncle Dex you're a boy, does that mean you're gross and stinky?"
"Yes Dex, are you gross and stinky?" John teased.
"You aren't an exception, Papa! You're a boy too." Phoebe accused.
"Hmm... they have a point, no?"He considered looking to Dex.
"Yes, boys are stinky and gross. Made of slime, snails, and puppy dog tails, we're basically monsters."
I finished Selina's hair and patted her shoulders.
"And don't monsters eat little princesses?" John asked
"I believe they do. Oh and little queens, in fact we have a taste for royalty." Selina and Phoebe began running. John and Dex chased after them. I could hear the girls' shrill laughter and screams as they moved further away.
If my plan is to go without a hitch I have to be sure I win over everyone. I know Mr. Charlie likes me, John seems partial and he's a man so I could easily manipulate him if I need to, I'm not sure what Eliza thinks of me. She seemed pleased but women are tricky things. We will smile gleefully as we tear you apart. I think if I show that I love Dex convincingly enough she'll have to like me.
Night had fallen heavily in the manor. My body is restless, I have never been able to sleep in foreign places. I got up and looked around my room. The white curtains hung from the window, slightly paler in the glow of the moon. The soft blue of the walls during the day became a darker shade along with the blue canopy over my bed. I wonder what ever happened to the girl Dex saved from the alley. I have been here all day and the girl wasn't here...perhaps he found a home for her. Obviously he could not just keep the child so that's the logical thing to do. I can't very well ask, so I'll just have to trust in my theory. Still, I'm curious. I tried lying back down but I simple could not. I turned this way and that. I flipped my pillows to the cool side. Even flailed around in frustration for a moment or two. I forfeited the idea of sleep and got up. I pulled on a long silk robe of white over my night gown.
The manor was pleasantly quiet, not like the Phantomhive manor. No, the silence here is pleasant, peaceful, not cold, and pressing. The hall ways of Dex's manor are a warm mahogany. Art decorated the walls, paintings of angels and the heavens. Perhaps it isn't prudent for me to wander the halls at night. Of course the dark has no effect on my eyes, in fact the normal succubus is strictly nocturnal. Being part human allows me to be in the light without pain. Anyway I should scope out the place to be sure no family followed me. This is simply surveillance. I owe everyone that much, if I'm going to force myself on them. Just like an emotionless witch, I'm still not going to stop.
How long have I known Vincent? How long have I taken care of him only to be treated like a tool? How many men had he given me to, so he could have what he wanted? Alright I didn't actually...do anything with them, but giving memories and illusions is still very personal. Vincent never felt remorse for any of it. He never felt bad about anything he did or didn't do. In his mind I owed him my loyalty, and for years I let him believe that. Hell, I let myself believe, but now I have a shot of getting out. I could be adored, and loved like I always wanted! I could have a family. Think of it, me with a family. Not just a terrible friend. An actual loving husband, a brother, a mother in law to complain about! I could have children. My arms wrapped around my stomach. I could have a baby of my own. Yes, Ciel is my darling, but he isn't mine. To think of a child or children, it's exhilarating! I could have everything I once lied, stole, and cheated for. Dex would love me, he already does, or at least that's what he believes. Either way he isn't lying when he says he adores me. Even knowing how terrible and hideous of a person I am he adores me. Dex doesn't believe he is entitled to me; he doesn't even think he deserves me. It is I who doesn't deserve. He is nice, so very nice and handsome...And intelligent. Not to mention his modesty. He built his textile industry from the ground up all on his own and he doesn't even bring it up. Most men would flaunt their hard work and success like a male peacock does his feathers. I know I would, but Dex doesn't even think anything of it. No he woos me by reciting poems and excerpts from some of my favorite books. He's a romantic, a sugary romantic. Speaking the work of Emily Bronte, and Jane Austen. He is a hopeless mushy romantic. It's different, that's why I like it. Contrarily my romance is gory, bloody, and full of pain. I'd give him my heart should he ask for it. I would reach into the cavity of my immortal chest and rip the bloody thing out. I'd put my token of love in a nicely wrapped box and give it to him if that meant he'd believe I love him. I'd give him my skin if he were cold and if he wished it, I'd hold him so close the marrow of our bones would mix. I would give him anything to make him believe I love him.
I heard footsteps on the far end of the hall. It is only Dex. I know the sound of his heart and the rhythm in which blood flows through his veins. I wonder will he be cross that I have been wandering aimlessly through his home. Dex is walking towards me, taking his time as he always did.
"Camilla, why are you still awake?"
"I can't sleep." I said smiling sheepishly.
"Hmm...What are we going to do about that Ms. Nightshade?" He asked closing the distance between us. The moon stole away his color leaving snow skin, bright eyes, and a glistening smile.
"I don't know, my Lord, but all attempts at slumber have been futile." I explained resting my hands on his chest.
"It can not be helped," he held the small of my back.
"Why aren't you asleep?"
"How can I sleep with your little feet parading around my home?" He smiled. I stared up at him for a bit then laughed. His hair was in disarray about his head. It's odd not seeing it neatly combed back. I stood on the tops of my toes and smoothed his hair to the best of my ability. He kissed my cheek while I focused on his hair. I looked in his eyes and smiled.
"Today went better than I imagined," I said.
"Well, you already knowing father helped."
"He probably knows me better than I know him. I didn't even recognize him at first...I think it's the facial hair."
"Yes that's relatively new. Oh and you know mother likes you."
"She does?" I asked, a delighted smile taking over my face.
"You couldn't tell."
"No, but I hoped she would."
"The girls don't know what to think of you."
"And John?"
He frowned and stared down at me for a moment,"He likes you...a bit too much."
"Hmm, you know I really do not see the appeal."
"To yourself or him."
"Both."
"Well I don't see what attracts women to him either, but you can not possibly think you are not appealing." He asked looking down at me seriously.
"I don't know...I mean I don't understand how you can stand me. You know exactly what I'm doing, what I've done and you're still doing this?"
"Of course I am. You are a good person, a beautiful person who is not a saint. No one is a saint, the saints are not even saints. Sometimes people push you to do terrible things and I can't stand the idea of you being pushed."
"Do I not deserve to be pushed?"
"No one deserves to lose how they are by the hands of another."
I thought about that,"I'm not a victim, Dex, I chose. Every one has a choice, I could have ran away. When he hurt me, I could have ran."
"It was fight or flight and your body chose fight. That does make you evil that makes you strong."
I should just take this and move on. I have him, right? He's mine. This is the plan. I'm winning, so why do I feel so damn wretched.
"I'll hurt you. You think too much of me, give me too much credit."
"I believe in you. I can not change who I love and never would I think to change it."
"I'll hurt you like I hurt everyone."
"Is this about Vincent?" His voice was soft, tender, but I could hear the jealousy behind it.
"He's angry with me. I...just don't like it when he's angry with me. I know it's because in some twisted way he cares, maybe even loves."
"He could not love you in all his life as much as I love you in one day. I may seem silly and naive to you but...when you smile I feel like the happiest man in the world and when you're sad I wish to annihilate what ever torments you. I really only want to see you happy, all of the time."
Just like that he had me. I can not fathom this feeling. He is supposed to be my means of getting out, someone I might very well kill should he rub me the wrong way.
"I want to be yours, to be the one who causes your smiles and fits of laughter, and protect you from sorrow and pain." He vowed.
"Then I'll have you," the words left my mouth before I could trap them. Three words bubbled to my lips, out of my control and in to the air between us before I knew it,"I love you."