Silly

XxXxXx

Looking out over the practice field Lennox couldn't help but get a nagging feeling that something was up. Not a bad something…more like the premonition of amused dread that came before a twin prank.

The field itself did not reveal anything greatly out of the ordinary. Drones all over the field as "soldiers" with a big "Con Boss", as everyone referred to the big battle drone, at the very back. The drones were of a new design; disguised as everyday items, for instance a trashcan, they would perform a simple transformation and pop out when a human or mech drew near and open fire. The drones' ammunition was simple paint balls, orange today, that could easily be seen on those who took "damage" without inflicting real damage. The NEST team had white paintballs. Simple, normal setting…unless one counted the sheer number of the drones. There had to be at least a hundred of the damn things clustered all over the field.

Lennox shook his head. He was being paranoid. Mudflap and Skids were below him with the rest of the NEST squad. Though they had pulled a few elaborate pranks, he didn't credit them with the intelligence or the subtly to pull one while surrounded by the other mechs…nor did he think they were THAT stupid to either.

"Getting old and paranoid." Lennox muttered to himself.

"Paranoid, sure, but less of the old shit." Lennox turned to see Epps and Optimus Prime join him on the hill, " 'Specially since I'm a year older than you. Old my ass…"

"Old man." Lennox teased, "Least you aren't as old as Ironhide. I just got a feeling that a prank is in the works."

"Let us hope not." Prime said, almost like he was convincing himself to hope for that, "The twins are still working off their last prank, Sideswipe and Jolt are still too afraid to pull a prank after gluing Ratchet's tools to the ceiling and I don't sense the others in the mood for a revenge prank."

Epps and Lennox shared a chuckle over Sideswipe and Jolt's misery. Pranking Ratchet was one thing, and often commended when successful, but having an enraged CMO coming after you with all the fury of pit was hilarious to everyone but the panicked unfortunates. It was totally understandable that Sideswipe and Jolt were still too afraid to try again after the beating they took from the Hatchet's wrench.

"Well, we can only hope." Epps shrugged, "I mean, it's a friggen exercise. What can they do?"

"I cannot believe you just said that…"

"Ok listen up!" Graham paced in front of the suddenly attentive group of humans and mechs, "We've had trouble with the drones in the past but I really would like to work on our one on one combat skills with the Con Boss. Does anyone need to practice with these guys or can we bypass them for now?"

"I think Ironhide said something about needing the practice." Ratchet offered.

Lennox blinked. Something about the exchange was ringing as familiar in his mind. But it was also strange…very strange. Ironhide was the most experienced fighter of the entire base. Why would he want the practice?

The major glanced over at the black mech. Ironhide's good optic had a distinct glazed over look to it, dimmed slightly. Lennox blinked again. Ironhide, the one most eager of them all to fight under any circumstance, the one who looked for any excuse to just blow something up, the one who demanded attentiveness out of all the soldiers, was not paying attention? Oh yeah…something was up.

"Christ…" Graham sighed, "Alright then, uh, Sideswipe and Jolt will go in and gather up a few groups of drones since they're fast enough to avoid fire. Go opposite directions to scatter then a bit so we don't have concentrated fire in one spot. If they start to break off and regroup, Arcee, try to scatter them again. We don't want to have to take down a whole group in case the mob returns fire on us at once. Uh, everyone is going to need to go in hot because we'll get in trouble if we don't take these things down quick enough. I think that's a pretty good idea, we'll get this done quick enough and be able to repeat with the remaining groups. Let's see, Ratchet can you give us a number crunch?"

"I'm coming up with a thirty-two point three three, repeating of course, percent chance of survival."

"What's up with the ace of hearts?" Epps muttered to Lennox.

"The what?"

"Graham, Ratchet and Ironhide got an ace of hearts on them."

Lennox glanced at them and sure enough, the three had an ace of heart on them. Graham had his tucked into his vest front pocket and the two mechs had theirs held on under a corner of armor on their chests, but still highly visible. Suddenly, things started falling into place. The multitude of drones, the heart, the pep talk, Ironhide, the plan…it all made sense now. "Oh no…"

"Well, that's a lot better than we usually go in with." Graham said, "Think we're ready…"

Ironhide's optics brightened suddenly and his cannons came online abruptly, whining as they powered on. An all too familiar recording echoed loud and clear across the field.

"Alright chums, I'm back. Let's go this. LEROOOOOOOOOY JEEENKIIIIINSSS!"

Ironhide charged in, totally heedless of Graham's carefully made plans. Drones began popping out left and right, firing orange paint balls everywhere.

It was silent for 1.2 seconds.

"…Oh primus he just ran in."

"Go GO! Stick to the plan! Oh slag…" Graham ran after them.

"Oh slag…oh frag!"

It was total chaos as Ratchet and Graham flew after Ironhide, the rest of the bewildered NEST squad scrambling to follow, desperately trying to regain some sense of order as paintballs flew wildly from both sides. Drone group after drone group popped up until all the groups were running around free. Epps doubled over, roaring with laughter. Optimus slapped a hand to his face in classic face palm. This could NOT be happening!

"What the PIT?"

"Get this one off me!"

"I can't! I got too many shots! I'm out!"

"Oh slaggit!"

"Scatter them!"

"I got this, I got this! We got 'em!"

"Primus damn it all, Ironhide!"

"Oh my God…"

Mechs and humans came crawling out of the fray, covered head to toe in orange paint, yelling and cursing. White paint littered the ground but hardly any of the drones carried any evidence of "damage". As the last of the soldiers staggered miserably out, the drones began to curl back into their disguises.

"Primus dammit Ironhide!"

"That was ridiculous."

"Why do you do that slag, Ironhide?"

"Not my fault!"

"Is there anyone left out there? Are we all down?"

"Yeah, we're all down."

"Oh God." Graham sighed, seeing everyone over in the "dead" section.

"For primus' sake…" This from Ratchet who slapped Ironhide upside the head, "Ironhide you're just stupid as pit, you know that?"

Ironhide's next words not only stemmed the tirade building against him but broke the ruse as everyone fell over laughing, sending Lennox rolling on the ground next to Epps. Optimus simply groaned at his supposedly superbly trained warriors.

"Least I got cannons."

XxXxXx

A/N: I had to. I simply had to. This is to all my fellow WoW-heads out there! For those who are addicted to World of Warcraft (and have this achievement). For those who are going "eh?" I urge you to go watch the Leroy Jenkins movie on YouTube. Even if you don't play the game, it's still utterly hilarious. The ace of hearts was supposed to mimic the guild tabards btw. Ironhide Jenkins!