Hi.

Thanks for the love. Reviews are greatly appreciated. This was a very difficult chapter to write, but I thought it was necessary for character development, and also to keep my readers informed.

Disclaimer: Castle and For Lovers Only aren't mine :/

[Broken But Healing]

An orange glow filtered in through the flimsy curtains as a slight afternoon breeze trickled in from the cracked open window. The curtains danced as the wind blew cool air against the fabric, making them come alive. Horns honked and birds chirped outside, which mixed into a strange symphony of sounds.

Kate was exhausted. Her body ached in places she didn't know could even ache, but it was a good ache. A reminder of him, of what he could do, especially with those hands of his. A small groan worked its way out of her throat, goose bumps tingling over her arms and legs at just the memory of his hands. The gentle back and forth motion of his fingers as they ghosted down her spine almost felt...real.

That's when she realized it was.

Opening her eyes and cocking her head over her shoulder, the sheet slid down her chest, becoming exposed, as she caught his gaze. She smiled at him while his hand continued its ministrations and traveled up and down her back in smooth rhythms, the motions relaxing and hypnotic.

"Hi," he greeted. "You dozed off for a bit there. Did I wear you out?"

He was smug. Bastard.

Smirking, Kate let out a sigh as she let his fingers take her to heaven. "Is that even a question?" She shot back, eyes closing. "I'm sore in places I didn't even know could be sore."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"You should. Very talented hands you've got there, Mr. Castle."

That made him chuckle. "As do you, Miss Beckett. As do you."

Kate rotated on her side so that she now faced Rick, her hand reaching up to fiddle with his hair. For some reason, she always seemed to be touching it or playing with it. Didn't know why. She just liked it, and from the low sigh Rick let escape, he did too.

A heavy weight soon pressed down on her shoulders. She couldn't not be truthful with him. Pressing a kiss to his lips chastely, Kate opened her heart to him. How could she not after everything that has happened in the last twenty-four hours?

"This is crazy," she began, still twirling his hair between her fingers as she propped herself up on her arm, elbow digging into the mattress. She could feel his large hand encompassing her waist, his thumb swirling over the soft skin.

"What is?" He whispered. "Us?"

"Yeah, us."

Brow knit in confusion, he tilted his head to the side. "What about us?"

"That we're an us– that we're here, together. It's like, I was hoping to never see you again, and then at the same time wanting to see you every single morning I woke up. I– does that make sense?"

Head sideways on his pillow he nodded. "Actually, it does. It makes complete sense, because I felt the same way. Wanting to see you, but not wanting to see you."

"Good." She shook her head on a sigh, "Because nothing else does."

Shifting slightly on the bed, he gave her middle a squeeze. "I know...I woke up this morning the happiest man in the world. Nothing could have changed that or brought me down. And on the way to pick you up, I was racking my brain, thinking about all of the moments we had, had together– all the moments we never had– and it was then that I realized just how lost I had been before. How I went through the motions, never taking a step back to look around me– to truly live.

"But then I understood. I understood that all of those missed moments led up to this, to us. Everything. Every twist and turn, every curved road, and every bump led straight back to you, Kate." He took her hand in his, placing a single kiss upon it. "I never truly felt complete, as cliché as that might sound, when you left. I wasn't the same man anymore. It was like I had a piece missing, a lost part of my soul had disappeared. But ever since I first saw you two days ago, looking as gorgeous as ever, I've never felt more complete or more alive in my entire life."

She reached over to cup his cheek as she continued to listen, her heart hammering in her chest.

"So, what I'm trying to say is that the hell we've both gone through has been worth it because we've made it here. We're together, and it's– well, crazy. But a good crazy."

Nodding her head, Kate grew troubled. Something that didn't go unnoticed by Rick, yet before he could poke and prod and ask what bothered her, she was speaking again.

"I gotta tell you something..." Then, with a weak smile, she nodded her head toward the bathroom behind her. "Care to take a bath with me?"

Knowing from experience not to push her, especially when she needed to discuss something, he decided to refrain from asking any questions. He'd let her do this on her own terms, and if that meant waiting until she was ready to share, he'd wait as long as it takes. If he pushed, she wouldn't open up. And that's not something he'd want for her– for them.

He gave her a single head nod in confirmation. "I'd love to."

Water poured from the faucet, the naked duo watching in silence as the tub filled. Kate buried herself in his arms, needing the connection. And he held her; no words exchanged between them.

As soon as the tub was full, the overwhelming scent of strawberries encompassed the tiny room, Rick climbed in first, with his back pressed firmly against the cool porcelain. Kate soon followed. She slid in between his legs, her hips nestled between his as her backside burrowed against his chest.

Once they were comfortable, Rick began to wash her body as he, once again, waited patiently. Dazed with the gentle touch of his soapy hands as he stroked long lines up and down her arms, back and forth, Kate almost lost it. He was being so sweet and understanding, she didn't know if she could make it.

He was peppering kisses along her shoulder blades, the back of her neck, and anywhere else he could reach. Sweet man.

"It was my dad," she unexpectedly said, the silence now broken. "He, uh...he was in a car accident three months ago and was killed upon impact."

Praying it wasn't true, even though he knew better, Rick held her tighter. "Oh God. I'm so sorry, Kate. So sorry." He placed many open-mouthed kisses along her back, tears springing from both of their eyes. "Wish I'd known...I would've paid my respects."

"That's sweet of you. Really. But we hadn't seen one another in years. It's okay. I didn't reach out to you for a reason."

"And what reason was that?" He wondered, not seeing or understanding why she never called. Hell, why she didn't reach out to him somehow.

Motioning between them, she tried to explain. Her words struggled to come out, though. "We– uh, we hadn't spoken or seen one another in years. And–"

"Had I known about your dad, regardless of everything between us, I still would have come to the funeral. He was a great man, Kate. More of a father to me than my actual father."

Guilt rose in her belly like bile. She should've told him.

Couldn't do anything about that now.

"He loved you, you know," her words were whispered, "You were like a son to him, and he was proud of you– proud of his son like a father should be."

There's a brief pause. "What happened?" He finally asked.

Twirling herself in his arms, she wrapped her arms around his neck and ducked her head in the crook of his neck. She couldn't look at him when she said this, didn't want him to see her heartache.

Shuddering a breath, she told him. "I had plans with him to go out for lunch at one of our favorite restaurants one day. He called me to let me know he was going to be late due to traffic, which in New York wasn't a surprise, so I waited for him. About ten minutes later, I got a phone call; it was the Precinct. I'd gotten a case, and not wanting my dad to show up and have me suddenly not there without any explanation as to why, I sent him a text telling him I'd caught a case and that we should reschedule our lunch date for the following week.

"So I left the diner and headed to the scene. Given zero details as to what had happened or who had been killed, I was unsure of what to expect. But by the time I arrived on the scene...I knew."

Letting out a shaky breath, Rick gulped and shut his eyes. He knew too.

"It was my dad," she said. "He had been in a taxi cab, and the driver made an impulse decision to run the light, not paying attention. And because of that split second decision my father was killed."

Kissing her, anywhere and everywhere, Rick let those tears fall. His heart ached for her– for her pain, her loss. He couldn't imagine.

"And that's why you came to Paris? To France? To get away from it all?"

Kate nodded. "I dug myself into a hole, lost those closest to me because of it." Her voice cracked, tears streaming down her cheeks and sliding down Rick's back as she yanked him closer. "That image of him in the taxi cab will forever be imprinted in my brain...just like my mom in the alley." She let out a gasp of air, unable to withstand the amount of pressure caving in on her heart. "God– I miss them so much."

He wished he had been there. He wished he could've have comforted her. He wished a bunch of things.

She was shaking in his arms, her cheek pressed firmly against his chest. Rick gave her entire body a squeeze, giving her some encouragement.

The two remained in the tub, neither speaking, but rather using the silence as a form of comfort and support.

Hands stroking her hair, he wrapped himself completely around her lithe form, seeking to protect her from the outside world. The very world that has crumbled beneath her feet.

"I'm not going to pretend that I know how you feel, because I don't," he truthfully stated, his tone soft. "But I promise you that I will do my absolute best to comfort you and be there for you."

He felt her shake her head, a sniffle preceding her words. "I don't want to seem weak if I seek comfort from you."

Rick's reply was immediate. "You won't. If you come to me, then that does not mean you're weak, Kate. In fact, it's just the opposite."

She lifted her head and looked at him, and he could see just how broken she was. But she was healing, slowly.

"You're by far the strongest person I've ever met, and I've met a lot of people." Kate chuckled at his attempt of humor; he was always trying to lighten a dark situation. It worked. "I know that you'll come to terms with this one day, and even though that day may not be today, just please don't do this alone. Let me help you."

Attacking his mouth with hers, she sobbed as she kissed him. All of her emotions spilling out without her control. Lips ghosting over his, she mumbled, "You already have."

There you go!

Hope you liked it. Reviews are love. Next chapter will be posted soon!

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