WASSUP? Me? I've just been playing with fake teeth that I won at an arcade. They've inspired me to write this chapter. Enjoy. And brush yo teeth, kids.
Percy Jackson and the Potato Farm
Chapter 3: I Am Weak
I walked into Walmart and this old door greeter guy just stared at me, smiling obnoxiously. I could see that he had dentures.
I waved at him just to curb his ego a little bit, but soon regretted it; he interpreted the friendly gesture as an invitation to initiate conversation.
"Hey, sonny boy! What are you up to at this time of night? Isn't it after your curfew?"
I looked down at the blue watch on my wrist. "Um...it's 9:47 in the morning, sir."
"When I was your age, I was mowing lawns. I was delivering newspapers on my two-speed bicycle. I was washing cars. And, young man, you're just shopping at Walmart." He shook his fist angrily in the air.
I was so confused. "So, uh...something tells me you really don't enjoy working at a place like Walmart..."
"Boy! Give me fifty push-ups. I served in the military! I fought in Vietnam! I think I know how to keep my priorities straight. Drop and give me fifty, let's go!"
I started to walk away, but he grabbed me and pushed me to the ground. "Make that seventy-five!"
"Sir, I can't do push-ups, I am weak."
"Don't sass me, boy! Make that one hundred! Come on, boy!"
"Henry, leave that poor boy alone!" came a different voice.
It was another employee. She shooed him away as he muttered something about how ungrateful and wimpy teenagers are these days.
She helped me up off the floor. "I'm so sorry! Henry needs to retire. This was his third episode this week!
"That's ok, it was...fun," I said.
"Here, have this. I hope you're ok." She handed me a fifty dollar Walmart gift card.
I couldn't believe it. Maybe Poseidon really was watching over me.
"Wow, thanks!" I told her. She smiled and walked away.
This was perfect. Just what I needed to buy my farming equipment.
I grinned and skipped away to the gardening section.
R&R, fools! I'm lonely.