Chapter Fourteen – Is this Goodbye?
Bumblebee's Point of View
Voices…They rung inside my head and merged together like a never ending drone, confusing me to the point of groaning. They were trying to pry me awake from this state I'd slipped into. I knew I wasn't dead, but I wasn't technically alive, was I? Could I be in the Well of Allsparks? I didn't know. Probably not…Maybe I was in some zone in between.
It didn't matter. I felt horrible. Pain in absolutely every place it could sneak into.
"Bumblebee, wake up…C'mon, kid. Fight it."
"Bumblebee? Can you hear us?"
Someone patted my cheekplate. I turned my head to the other side.
"Wake up…"
"Wake up…"
Over and over.
I heard a monitor beeping beside me, steady, but slow, in time with my spark. I tried to open my optics, tried to tell whoever that I could hear them, but I couldn't. My head hurt too much and the pain in my side wasn't anything greater. I coughed, energon rolling onto my chin. Someone wiped it away.
"What's wrong with him? Why isn't he waking up?"
"Good question…"
"Bumblebee, say something. Anything…"
"C'mon, buddy. Wake up."
"Wake up…"
I wanted to say something, but all I could utter out was a groan.
"Bumblebee…"
It was Optimus. I tried to say something, but I only coughed again. I could barely breathe. My vents felt clogged. I wheezed, clawing at the cool metal under me. Someone tilted my chin back, opening up my throat so I could breathe better. I helped a little, and my chest rose slowly. I groaned.
"How long has he been like this?"
"Too long."
"C'mon, little bot…"
I heard my internal systems rev inside me as they shifted into a more efficient status, my spark humming louder inside its chamber as it pulsed a little quicker with the monitor. I stirred, feeling my strength increase not a lot, but enough.
I slowly fluttered open my optic lids with a weak twitter from my throat, though the sound was more like a strangled groan. I moaned softly under a sigh.
"Bumblebee?" My commander's voice cooed. I felt his massive hand cover my right shoulder plate, his fingers giving me a concerned squeeze. I only shut my optics tightly, trying to get rid of the annoying pain-filled sensations that burned into my every wire and molecule. I called him name back, but all that came out was a dying purr. His hand lifted away.
"Little one…"
I heard footsteps approach my other side and another hand lay on my side, right on my injury. I shivered in a twitch, my sensitive wound stinging as fingers grazed over it. I wanted to swipe the hand away and stop the throbbing pain that grew, but I couldn't. I pressed my cheekplate into the metal lying beneath it, swallowing slowly to prevent from groaning again. I whirred helplessly.
Voices echoed again…
"Will he hold?"
"He should. The wound shouldn't be enough to damage him that much."
"Yet, he's unresponsive…"
"I can't understand why…"
"Why…?"
"Why…?"
More voices after that…I couldn't understand them. Previous ones echoed over and over.
Turning onto my back, I opened my optics, scanning the room dizzily. Where was I?
"Bumblebee??"
"He's awake…!"
"Thank, Primus."
I saw the entire Autobot platoon, but there were so many of them, definitely more than four. Their images stretched and constricted up and down, side to side like amoebas, even like they were reflections in a puddle. I shook my head as if to clear my vision and snap out of it, and slowly, their images sharpened within a few seconds.
I clearly saw the squad, circled around me, staring at me with worried optics. I noted subconsciously that I was lying on a medical berth in Ratchet's quarters. It was almost pitch black outside. I whirred again as Ratchet walked closer to me, adjusting some wires in my side. I whimpered and clutched his wrist instinctively. He shot a look at me.
"Bumblebee, it's okay. Let go, youngling," he ordered me with a smile. Obediently, I slowly let go, keeping my optics locked on his fingers as they fiddled with my wiring. I leaned my head back and tried to regulate my breathing. Pain shot up my side and I cried out for only a second. Barricade flashed into my mind, and there I was, screaming in pain as he drove spikes into my side. I shuddered and forced the images out of my head, forced my screams out of my receptors. They faded away, leaving a chill up my spine.
Jazz strolled over to me, leaving Ironhide's side. He smiled at me. I didn't return it.
"You okay, kid?" He asked me with a frown now, patting my chest.
I blinked, then nodded slowly. "I-I guess…"
He twisted his lip and glanced at my side. "You sure did get messed up, Bee…"
I looked down at it, too, seeing many wires, some frayed, some totaled. Blood was still damp on surrounding armor plates, and sparks popped out of my wound as Ratchet worked diligently. I was naturally tense with each sting of pain that struck me, my hand gripping the berth tightly.
I hesitated, forcing the battle scene out of my head. I started to answer Jazz, but didn't.
He looked to my optics. "You'll be yerself again soon enough." He patted my head, and I whirred at him, giving him a small smile. I looked around as he returned to Ironhide's side, talking again. My smile faded.
How had I gotten here? I couldn't remember anything. My CPU's memory banks were jumbled, disorganized. That battle was like a scattered collection of video clips, short ones. A scene would replay itself in my head, then it'd cut short unexpectedly, fast forwarding to another scene to play out of sequence. I blinked out of my disorientation and stared at the floor, thinking, not saying a word.
"How did I get here?" I asked no one in particular.
Optimus started to answer, but let Jazz.
"You passed out after the battle, kid," he told me calmly.
I blinked.
"I don't remember that…"
"Not a surprise," Ratchet said, not looking away from his operating on my side. "Most people don't remember such events."
I looked away, furrowing my brow. They'd told me the story, but I felt like something was missing. Like I was only ninety-nine percent of myself and I couldn't locate the other remaining percent. It nagged at my mind.
Optimus breathed a sigh of relief, leaning down to smile at me. I looked to him quickly.
"Welcome back," he said warmly. His hand stroked my forehead and I smiled, nuzzling into his palm. He always made me feel one hundred percent even if I was in this condition. He wasn't just my commander, but I saw him as my father too.
Like Darren saw me as his.
My optics widened and I looked away.
"Oh, God…" I uttered under a breath.
DARREN.
I whimpered and tried to lean up, looking around recklessly…on the floor, on Ratchet's desk, even on the ceiling. I felt my chin start to tremble and I whimpered again. My spark thudded, the monitor's beeping accelerated noticeably. Ratchet turned at it, to me, then to everyone else. I struggled to breathe right, uttering choked cries. I felt like I was going to pass out.
"N-No…" I breathed, tears already shining in my optics.
"Bumblebee, calm down," the officer advised me, setting a hand on my shoulder. I shrugged it away, shaking my head quickly.
My spark dropped as my scanners didn't detect my human boy.
My Darren…
Optimus furrowed his brow at me. I heard the others murmuring amongst themselves.
"Bumblebee?" He said quietly. "What is – "
"Wh-Where's Darren?" I cut him off, my voice modulators harshly crackling online. Energon stung my eyes again.
Surely they'd gotten him from Barricade. They couldn't have left him to that monster.
They couldn't have.
Primus, please let him be here. Safe, unharmed.
Let him be here. Oh Primus, please. Where is he?
Optimus' optics looked into mine and he frowned, turning to regard the others.
"Give us a few moments," he ordered them in a soft voice. "…Please."
I knew that tone. I knew something bad was coming. I groaned sadly, shivering.
I watched them all as they hesitated, then departed from the room in single file.
No, no, no, no, no…
"Bumblebee…" He started.
"Sir, what is it…" I interrupted again. My voice was shaking, my throat felt clogged as more tears rose. "Where is he, Optimus? Where's Darren?"
Optimus gave me a mild glare as I raised my voice at him.
"Bumblebee, you know where he is," he stated lowly. "You saw what happened to him."
The tears fell finally, splashing onto my cheekplates. "…You let Barricade have him."
"Bumblebee, that's completely ridicu – "
"Why didn't you get him back?!"
I got another glare from Optimus, but I didn't care.
My all was gone.
Hideous images struck me. Darren in the claws on that monster…tormented, crying, screaming for help. I almost cried out. My spark felt dead.
"…Barricade disappeared completely from our every radar…and every scanner couldn't detect him. We have no idea where he's gone, but we know he has Darren," Optimus spoke.
I knew that…
I shuddered at the words. "…H-How will I get him back?"
Optimus mused in silence for a moment. "We will get him back, Bumblebee. You're not going alone on such a treacherous mission."
I didn't answer him. Instead, I looked away. I let my fingers graze over my side's wound. My tears fell faster as I remembered Darren's tiny hand waving at me during the battle. The way his pale blue eyes were drooped in complete horror and worry for me. How he didn't want me to get hurt. How his trembling body felt under my arm as he struggled to even stand. Struggled to keep living through the pain.
How he felt in my arms, his ear over my heart, listening.
I shut my optics. I felt sick.
"Darren…" I murmured. "I-It's my fault…You told me to keep him safe."
Optimus' optics drooped at me.
"No, Bumblebee."
"I've failed you, Sir…"
Optimus' arm moved around my shoulders and I whirred at him in protest. My head shook quickly, but I couldn't help but tuck my head in the crook of his neck.
"You fought strong, my warrior."
I whimpered, coughing through sobs.
"Optimus, I-I…D-Darren, he's gone."
"At the break of dawn, we are searching for him. Releasing him from Decepticons."
"Th-They'll kill him," I ignored his statement. "H-He won't be alive when we find him."
"Shhh, don't say that."
I pressed against my commander, whirring shakily.
This is probably what Darren felt like when he was with me, when I was holding him all those hours. Warm, safe, secure. Like the world's evil impurities had flushed away. Every sin, gone.
Optimus' fingers fondled with my neck's wiring, making me smile only the slightest bit. Images of Darren returned to me, and I felt my spark drop even lower inside me. He could be anywhere right now, in any condition. I squeezed Optimus with my hands. I felt sick.
Primus, don't be hurt, Darren…
As if he heard me, Optimus swayed be back and forth, nodding his head.
"We'll find him, Bumblebee," he whispered into one of my receptors. "Don't you worry, young one."
I shook my head, though I believed him. "I just don't want him to be hurt, Prime…"
He wrapped his arms lower, around my middle. "Shh, shh, don't think about it anymore."
"I-I'll kill them," I choked out, shaking. "I'll murder them with my own hands if they hurt him. I swear to Primus I will. Without hesitation."
Optimus rubbed my back quickly. "Bumblebee, that's enough."
My tears only came faster. My body shook violently and Optimus struggled to control me.
"I've g-gotta find him now," my muffled words shook out. I even started to break away to leave, but Optimus clutched me tighter, pressing me against him. My cheekplate fell on his shoulder and I tried to pull away.
"No, Bumblebee, you're not fully healed yet. You wouldn't be fully effective with your wound."
I shook my head. "He could be d-dead, Prime. I have no time to waste!"
"You can't go, Bumblebee," he told me firmly. "You need to wait until dawn."
I didn't agree. Darren was everything to me. I couldn't lie here and waste time when anything could be happening to him right now.
Are you thinking of me, Darren? Are you crying like me too?
Optimus' fingers brushed my stomach to and fro, and I closed my optics, sniffling. I swayed in gentle motions again, calming down a little. I pressed my spark against his and whirred, feeling mine pulse a little slower after a surge as our bond comforted me. I opened my optics, and dropped my gaze. A tear fell.
Had I given up on Darren? I didn't know. My mind told me that he was dead…
Unfortunately, I believed it.
There's no one in this world that can ever take your place,
All the love that we share, it can never be erased .
And I know that, that it hurts so bad,
And it's so that, that you're the best I've had.
Goodbye.
//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\
Barricade's footsteps were lonely and massive against the cold metal of the hallway. Dim lights spilled a dark purple glow against it, and against his steel colored armor, making his optics seem more of a lightning red. He paused before a door, labeled with the Decepticon emblem, and let it hiss open and part away. He walked through and stopped before the throne that used to be Lord Megatron's. Now, Lord Starscream's.
He nodded once at his leader respectfully. "My Lord," he said slowly.
Starscream turned his gaze to the Decepticon scout, an evil snicker playing across his mouth. He sat straighter and leaned down with an arch of his back, his wings expanding over his broad shoulders.
"The human is in confinement?" He asked, his raspy voice echoing in the chamber.
Barricade nodded. "Yes, Sir. Locked behind bars like you ordered."
"Excellent," mused Starscream. "I believe you know what I expect from you next, scout."
Barricade hesitated. "Extermination?"
"No, you fool," shot Starscream. "Torture him. Make him beg for mercy in his anguish."
Barricade grinned, whipping out his chain mace with a shing. He laughed, his leader joining in with evil chuckles. Barricade nodded, admiring the sharpened spikes of his mace.
"Yes, my Lord. Your will be done."