By the time Joey and Jaimee had finally gotten all the equipment set up and everything, it was night. They had the capture card connected to the console and the laptop, and everything was recording and all that jazz.
"Alright-y then," Joey said. "Are you ready for this Jaimee?"
"I SURE AM!" Jaimee cried. Joey turned on the Nintendo 64.
"Hey, fags," Joey said into the microphone. "So I guess we're gonna play this crappy game called The Legend Of Zelda: Ocarina of Time for your stupid retarded nerd pleasure. My name's Joey by the way, and this is my gay friend Jaimee."
"WASSSSUUUUUUUUUPP?!" Jaimee shrieked into the mike.
"Okay so first off….what the hell?" Joey spat once the screen to select a save file came up. "Where….the fuck are all my save files?"
"I thought you never played this game cause it's gay cause all video games are gay and for faggotsexuals," Jaimee pointed out.
"Yeah well I-deh-wha-that's not the point!" Joey sputtered. "There were three save files they-they belonged to like my brother and stuff-"
"I thought your brother died in Vietnam," Jaimee said.
"Oh yeah that's true," Joey said (it actually wasn't that's ridiculous. "But still….goddammit!"
There had indeed been three save files there. The first was named 'MAIDMARA' and had been on there ever since Joey was a child, for it was his mother's save file. The second had been named 'LINK', and the third had been named I don't know nobody remembers but it was there. IT WAS THERE. IT HAD BEEN THERE I SHOULD SAY, AS IT NOW WAS NOT THERE.
"Fuck this shit!" Joey snapped. "The goddamn piece of shit game just fuckin deleted all my files!"
"How could it do that?" Jaimee questioned.
"Oh trust me, it can happen," Joey said. "N64 games are glitchy as fuck. I once turned on my Majora's Mask game, and all the save files were randomly just gone. So I started a new game anyway. At the beginning the fuckin Skull Kid takes your horse and your Ocarina, but when I paused the game, the inventory screen was completely filled with nothing but ocarinas. So then I could get transformed back into human form as soon as I got to Clock Town, but when I went out into the field, Link was all like he was at the very beginning of the game, with no heart meter or anything, and as soon as I got hit once I would immediately die. Then I turned off the game and when I turned it back on, guess what? All my save files were suddenly back, for no apparent reason."
"For a guy who says he never plays video games-" Jaimee started, but Joey smacked him.
"Shut up!" Joey snarled (it was still recording so Joey's abuse was documented). "Well, whatever. I guess we were just starting a new game anyway."
So he selected an empty file and named it 'FAGGOT' because he figured that's what Link deserved to be called. But as soon as he started the game, it froze.
"Goddammit-what the fuck!" Joey snapped. "This game is acting glitchy as all hell. Fuck this shit."
He reset the game in the hopes that it would work this time.
"Maybe the game is just pulling a 'Majora's Mask'", Joey suggested. "Maybe this time…."
However, this time when the game got to the file select screen….there was one save file. Only one. And it was not the one Joey remembered.
The name on the file was 'BEN.'
"What the fuck," Joey muttered, a chill running down his spine. He actually had a very minor phobia of glitches and let's not talk about that. The point is that this was very unusual…..he did not remember a file being named 'BEN' ever being on his copy of 'Ocarina of Time'. "This….this IS my game….isn't it?"
He had gotten it from right next to his own N64 at home. Could one of his parents' friends possibly have brought their own copy over and left it there? No…..that didn't seem too likely.
"Um I don't even get what all the fuss is about," Jaimee said. "Can we play the game or not?"
It wasn't his game so he was not exactly realizing how strange this was that there was a save file named 'BEN'.
"Shut up, dumbass!" Joey snapped. He decided to check out this 'BEN' file to see if anything possibly looked familiar, so he selected it. This person had only three hearts, and no Sacred Stones or anything…..no nothing.
Joey chose to begin the game. Strangely enough, it began at the very beginning of the game…..well actually that's not strange. If you don't save the game and then shut it off it will start from the beginning of course. Still though. It's a 'BEN' file
It started at the very beginning, where there is nothing but a black screen and the words:
In the vast, deep forest of Hyrule….
However, nothing else happened.
"What the hell?" Joey said after a few moments of staring at that sentence. It should have changed by now. "Don't tell me the game froze again…."
Suddenly, the sentence changed. Or….more like scrambled itself. Oddly enough the letters suddenly became scrambled with no warning, so that the sentence was nothing more than jibberish.
"This game sucks," Jaimee commented, and Joey hit him.
"Shut up, dude!" Joey snapped. "Something weird's happening."
Suddenly the sentence changed again. This time it actually formed words, but they were nothing like what should be in the beginning of the game. It read simply:
Do you want to play a game?
A chill ran down Joey's spine when the echoey chuckle of the Happy Mask Salesman was sounded in the game. How the fuck was THAT possible? The Happy Mask Salesman didn't make that laugh in this game….did he? It had been quite some time since Joey had played, but as far as he could remember, that echoey chuckle was only heard in Majora's Mask. And of course that made sense anyway, because the Happy Mask Shop in this game shouldn't really have much of an echo…...but the Clock Tower in Majora's Mask did…
"Wow this game is kinda creepy," Jaimee commented (I should mention that Jaimee had never played this game before).
"Jaimee…."Joey said, "this…..this isn't supposed to happen…."
Suddenly the screen changed. Link was suddenly in the Happy Mask Shop, and it was completely empty. Wasn't there a man who always stood in the shop, even before the salesman himself officially opened it…? Joey was pretty sure that fact was true. But nobody was there except for Link.
"This is so fucked up," Joey muttered (yeah he curses a lot when he's freaked out) and he picked up the controller and began to move Link around. He suddenly felt an eerie feeling, as if he was being watched…..he could tell that Jaimee was scared to, because Jaimee looked just as uncomfortable as Joey felt, and was continuously looking around the living room.
Joey tried to make Link leave the shop, but when he walked to where the exit should have been, absolutely nothing happened. Joey began to run around the small shop, rolling into things randomly. He even read the sign, which did the same thing it always did…..displayed the rules for using the shop. Joey cursed a little bit in frustration and confusion, and then….something happened.
A small ray of green light appeared over Link, and a statue of Link slowly materialized. Joey's heart almost stopped. He recognized that statue…..it was one of those creepy statues that appears in Majora's Mask after the Elegy of Emptiness is played. What….what could it be doing in this game?
As Joey….or Link, I should say…..ran around the small room, the statue disappeared and reappeared again where he had been running…..as if it was following him around the shop.
"Oh my god stop. Please please stop….." Joey, who was becoming very, VERY disturbed, muttered.
"Is it supposed to do this?" Jaimee asked, alarmed.
"Of course not!" Joey said. "This is really creeping me out…."
SUDDENLY, Link AND the statue both vanished from the screen in the blink of an eye and a horrible earsplitting noise sounded, blasting the TV speakers. It sounded like some sort of terrible screeching electronic game-fucking up noise…..like the game just bugged out bigtime and was squealing in protest. Has that ever happened to you? Has an old game just crashed so terribly that it not only froze but also made a horrible earsplitting sound and scared the living shit out of you? I don't know if that's ever happened, but it fuckin happened to me once. It SUCKED. And yes of course it happened to my friend Joey here but that was most likely because of a paranormal incident, not just a normal glitch.
Both boys cried out and Joey cursed very loudly. He immediately shut off the game.
"FUCK this shit!" Joey gasped. "What the FUCK was that?!"
He realized that the video was still recording.
"Um….uh….this concludes episode one of 'Ocarina of Time', guys!" Joey said into the mike, his voice cracking from fear. "I….I hope you enjoyed…."
"Like comment and subscribe and we'll play more haunted games!" Jaimee said and stopped the video even though he should NOT have touched Joey's laptop. "Wow, that was actually pretty cool! We should make an entire Let's Play channel of haunted games. We can call it…..GameBusters!"
"Shut up, dude," Joey said, still shivering in fear.
"Welp, I'm tired," Jaimee said, letting out a big yawn. "See ya tomorrow!"
And he went off to bed. Joey, however, sat there all night, still staring in fear at the Nintendo 64. And then he fell asleep eventually.