Man, I've been seeing all these fools hatin' on Ereri lately. I don't fuck with ignorance, but I bet they're a bunch of self-entitled twelve year old girls who still believe in coodies. Levi fucking Eren is not pedophilia you guys…it's deliciously hot. Sex with an older man makes things so much better.

Doubt they would know that though. Probably still dry humping their pillows.

Anyways.

Hello my darling little lambs. Welcome to yet another installment of the sexcapades. This chapter is a little short to me and it was meant to be. I honestly wanted to give you a more exciting chapter, but with finals coming to destroy my life I really haven't had time to write a grandiose chapter as I would like to. However, since I don't want to leave you guys hanging I decided to take a day out of my schedule to write this. I'm happy with it. It's short and sweet and to the point.

Also, if you guys could all be dears and go on my Tumblr page (link in my bio) and check out a post I wrote. It's called "EL James Did It, What The Hell? Why Can't I?" it's me basically describing a new idea for a Ereri/Riren story. If you guys could check it out and give me some feedback that would be really kick ass of you. Because no one else did. *insert sad face*

Other than that, I encourage you read on little pigs.

Chapter 3: Porn

Eren was becoming an old man, he knew this well. At the ripe age of twenty-two, he should be out on the town picking up some promiscuous honeys. Perhaps engaging in a bout of rude sex with them and then never calling them back. At least that's what normal people do on a Saturday to kill some boredom. However, Eren folded that hand – that glorious lifestyle – for spending his weekend days at home with his boyfriend, rolling around naked in a queen-sized bed, entangling the thin sheets in between their sweaty limbs and eating Chinese food in their underwear.

Currently, Eren was doing none of those. Levi left for Switzerland two days ago for a business trip. Of course, the kid had been invited to fly first class to arguably the richest country in the world to drink French champagne and rub shoulders with big corporate men, but no – you can't use vacation days without a two week notice, said the fat sack of shit who managed Eren's department. To which the boy promptly shredded all the man's in-coming mail in response. So, thanks to company regulations, Eren was now stuck in a vacant apartment, twiddling his thumbs in absolute monotony while his eyes were static to the television watching a show that wasn't terribly interesting, but not terribly uninteresting.

He was just bored to fucking death.

Levi wasn't expected to be due back from overseas for another day or so. Eren never knew with that man. Mysterious as a shadow in the night and fickle as an autumn sky when it came to planning things of this nature. That's when Eren found Levi to be the most frustrating. Especially when a robust youth such as himself hadn't been laid in several days. It would be nice to know when his lover was returning home so he could pounce on his bones. Christ, he had been thinking about it ceaselessly, making his frequent sighing during the day sound distant and wistful. Much like one of those pretty southern bells in classic movies who would sit in a sad rocking chair and gaze pathetically out the window until her husband returned home from the war.

It's a pitiful scene, really. However, brooding about sex was not the same as when Eren got lost in picturing it. That made his blood boil hot with delicious toxins. Today in particular, all the boy could do was imagine scenes in his brain – scenes so vivid that he damn near picked up the phone at work to call Levi a thousand miles away and tell him how badly he wanted to feel that wet tongue of his dip in between his thighs and make him squeal. Eren saw it even now; Levi sharp in a fitted black suit, blacker than the hair that laid so delicately above his frosty eyes, as he sat in the middle of an important conference. The phone would ring and he would answer it and then listen intently to Eren's low voice husk naughty words into his ear. The man would not falter. His demeanor would never fail him in such a humiliating way. Instead, Levi would outwardly nod and speak into the receiver as if it were a contractor, but in truth – just below the table – his dick would constrict and harden like stone.

You could say Eren had a lot of free time to ponder about these ideas. And indeed, how they were vibrant and clear in his mind. It presently had him experiencing the familiar sensation of jean fabric narrowing around his crotch, creating an uncomfortable friction that made him wince and shift in his spot on the couch. Goddamn, he needed a good fuck. It was almost embarrassing. Eren felt like he was fourteen year old boy again, shrouded away in the seclusion of his room and reflecting about nothing but burying his cock in anything that walked.

At that moment, his fingers absentmindedly twitched and began to trace down his clothed stomach. Gently, he slid an open right palm over his masked erection and left it there. It had been a while since the last time he felt the need to masturbate. Levi was a very attentive lover in the bedroom. There was no need for it.

But, Levi wasn't here and his hand pressed against his mounting need was the only stimulation he's had in days. As much as it pained him – something must be done. Eren rolled his eyes defiantly at his urges, slamming his free hand against the sofa cushion and propelling his body upwards. "Fuck it," he sighed heavily as he stood upright on his legs.

Eren marched expeditiously across the living room as if a fire had suddenly been lit beneath his feet. They certainly seemed a little too eager to carry him in the direction of the bedroom. The very second he stepped beyond the threshold of the door, he rotated swiftly on a heel and threw it shut. Regardless if he was the lone soul dwelling in his apartment, there was something about having the door propped open that bothered him. When hearing the reassuring sound of the brass handle clicking in the slot, Eren went straight to his designated side of the bed and dropped down to his knees, lifting the skirt and peeking underneath.

There lay his laptop. It was really only used it for play. Never for work. The kid stretched out his arm and seized it in his grasp, pulling it out from the darkness and flopping it on the mattress above. Eren quickly followed. He climbed up on the plush white comforter – neatly and strategically placed over the sheets as Levi always requested it to be – and placed the thin computer on top of his folded legs. He wedged the tip of his thumb in the small crevasse between the keyboard and monitor and pushed it open. To which a chime activated as the screen kicked on and loaded Eren's personal desktop settings.

When fully initiated and operational, Eren touched a finger to the mouse pad and immediately selected the internet icon. He stared at the default search engine for a minute. Oh, decisions, decision. Which porn website should he have to honor to peruse today? He shrugged indifferently at his deliberations. Whatever. Eren began to type. Click. Click. Click-click-click. Click. Then tapped the enter key. The screen flashed white as the computer rummaged through the evil and perverted subdivisions of the World Wide Web until finally it vomited back a crude homepage – littered with risqué videos and gifs of nine-inch dicks.

It was laughable. Eren truly couldn't believe that he had succumb to this horseshit. Nevertheless, he debated what exactly he was in the mood for. Perhaps something hardcore, but not to the point where it grossed him out. The titles pretty much spoke for themselves. His eyes scanned over the monitor until they landed on a video that seemed to tinkle his fancy.

Click.

The media player started to load – gradually, but surely. Eren took the time to extend a hand over to the nightstand at his bedside and open the first drawer, reaching in and hunting for the lube he and Levi kept stuffed away. He felt his fingertips brushed against the bottle and snatched it in his grip, drawing it out into the open. Still, the video was not functioning. Stupid fucking – bam! Eren wacked his hand upside the laptop. As if that helped.

Eventually, the film launched and began to play a low quality porno. It got straight down to the premises of the content by opening up with a scene of two relatively attractive men, the smaller one on all fours with an arched back and ass popped in the air while he charismatically gave the other larger man fellatio. That was Eren's queue to hastily unbutton his pants and zip down his fly. The boy yanked his jeans down his slender legs with underwear in tow and kick them off of his ankles, leaving his stiff member exposed and laying at attention on his abdomen. The last of the flavored lube was dumped in his palm then, making it greasy and shiny before Eren grasped his erection firmly and pumped his fist. Slowly. Up and down, up and down. A soft moan rumbled in his throat, but did not escape. He continue to watch – a stranger's mouth wrapped tautly around another stranger's massive cock, wishing vigorously that Levi was the one whose hand was rubbing him off. Eren pinched his right eyelid shut to fantasize, to focus on an image much prettier than porn while his left one wilted just enough to continue in his active viewing. His lips parted slightly to pant out lustful breaths. It was multi-tasking at its finest.

The on-screen blowjob only lasted for so long before it took a turn for the vile sex. The man who was sucking dick like a bowery slut was punctually flipped over on his back, thighs spreading as wide as Moses and the Red Sea as the other pornstar positioned the tip of his penis to a loose and experienced asshole. The camera zoomed in as that mammoth cock was shoved deep inside. Eren could nearly see the veins pulsating. Hefty groans emitted from both parties as the angle retracted to a full picture of two naked bodies fucking like animals. The man on the receiving end was bellowing out screams and-

"Ah-aahhh!" Eren gasped out shrill moan as he squeezed his erection. The urgency was on the rise. His pace quickened. His dick was so slick, so wet – the lube was oozing in between his clenched fingers. The sticky noises of him pleasuring himself hit Eren's ears and traveled up to his depths of his brain, relaying a critical message.

More.

He wanted to do more. He rarely took the time to pamper his body like this and once the sweet aroma of sex hit his senses Eren knew he could get a little…excitable. Quite the whore, actually. Levi couldn't even pretend that he didn't fucking love that about him. If only he were here now to bear witness.

But firstly, it was getting ungodly hot. Eren shot a hand back and grabbed a fistful of his shirt and then heaved it off his body in one fluid tug. It was instantly tossed aside to the floor and gloriously the boy was writhing naked on the bed. He threw his head back on the soft pillows, bowing his spine and stroking his leaking cock faster and faster with sweat forming on his forehead. He craned his neck slightly to peak down in between his knees at the computer monitor with a flushed face, observing as these low budget actor fuck each other into next year. Unconscious and moved by desire, Eren's precarious fingers of his unoccupied left hand trailed in between his legs. They reached for his aching entrance, teasing the rim and coating it was excess lubricant before plunging two in side by side and stretching himself.

Eren whimpered and then wrung out a lengthy moan from his lungs that fell on no one's conscious except his own. Strangely, it encourage him. He began to rub his dick raw – jerking his hand and all the while probing himself until his escalating cries began to synchronize with those echoing from the porn video. His arm soon became sore at the rate he was pumping, but dear God he was just about to cum.

"Come on," he breathed, toes curling into the comforter, "Come on…"

He was so fucking close he could almost taste his orgasm. He couldn't stop now even if he wanted to.

And then he heard the ghastly sound of the bedroom door opening.

"Eren," the recognizable tone of Levi's voice called to him as he entered the door, distracted with the task of lugging his suitcase as he spoke. "I was calling for you, brat. Did you hear the front-" Very suddenly, the man stopped cold in his sentence and froze. It was a rare occurrence when Levi was stunned speechless, however coming home after an eight hour flight to find your boyfriend spread eagle and stark naked on your bed pleasuring himself could do that to the most composed individuals. The shocking silence that lingered around the two lovers could have ceased time. The only noise that could be heard was a piercing male voice screaming, "Fuck me, fuck me!" from the laptop speakers.

Eren's green eyes were wide and glistening with mortification. All the blood in his body surged up to his face. He broke out in the reddest blush that Levi had ever seen and frantically slammed the computer screen down with a snap and tried to wrench the covers over his now dead erection. "H-Holy shit!" he shrieked in utter embarrassment.

Levi brows furrowed as he relinquished his hold on his suitcase, carefully taking a step towards the bed. He definitely did not anticipate this little spectacle when he came through the door. "What's going on here?" he questioned cautiously.

This isn't happening to him right now.

"It's only Saturday!" Eren cried out – horrified at his current circumstances. "You said you weren't going to be home until Sunday!" The boy was aware of how awfully tragic he must look right now – veiling his unclothed skin and shouting like an absolute fool after he just got caught earnestly masturbating.

"Our meeting got cancelled for tomorrow," Levi explained slowly, still startled by the scene he had blindly waltzed into. "I flew home earlier to surprise you. Turns out I got the opposite." He paused, meticulously studying the brat's shamed expression with cold eyes. "Is this what you do when I'm not here?"

The inquiry had Eren instinctively smack his palm to his forehead and turn away from his lover. He was about to die of humiliation. "Oh my god…"

"There's no need to be embarrassed," Levi assured him collectedly. Of course, he was maintaining a stoic composure. Why wouldn't he? "You were touching yourself. It's not a sin. Except for that gay porno you were watching."

The man was successfully making this unfortunate situation even more awkward by tenfold. His resign disposition had a way of driving Eren further into madness. The boy gravely buried his face deeper in his hands, "Please stop talking," he whined. His cheeks felt like there were ablaze. He was breaking out in a nervous perspiration. With his mind spinning around several different methods on how to properly explain is indiscretions, Eren didn't detect Levi's form walking towards him until he felt the mattress shift when the man sat down beside him. He couldn't bring himself to look at him in such a dishonorable state.

That is until Levi reached down and opened the laptop.

Eren's hand instantaneously went to grab for it, "No!"

"Too late," Levi said as he hauled out away from the brat's hysterical grasps. The monitor switched on to where the video had left off and it continued to show the dramatic last minute of the promiscuous reel. He scrutinized the smut with a calculating look as Eren progressively hoisted the sheets higher and tighter to his body, casting his eyes downward in disgrace and gnawing anxiously on his bottom lip. Levi brought his hand up to his mouth, fingers massaging his jaw in an attempt to conceal his smirk.

"Can I get dressed now?" Eren asked feebly.

"That would be redundant."

"What do you mean?"

"Because I'm going to finish you off," Levi replied coolly, his eyes growing hungry for the brat's flesh.

Eren's head snapped upwards in surprise, "What?" He hastily plucked the covers up and glimpsed at his flaccid member, "But I lost my hard-on."

"Well, we'll just have to fix that," the man declared boldly as he shut the computer in his lap and placed it gently on the floor. When his ravenous stare came back to meet with Eren's dazed expression – that boyish, innocent expression that drove him wild – Levi clutched the comforter twisted securely around the horny little piss ant's body and hauled it away with force, leaving his bare skin unprotected to dark desires. Eren scooted backwards from the fiery lust that seemed to radiate from Levi's body as the older man crawled dangerously towards him to settle his lips a mere inch from Eren's cock, setting those silky thighs on his shoulders, causing his knees to part before him.

Levi drummed his fingertips casually against the boy's flesh as he gazed impatiently at the need that involuntarily and desperately twitched for his touch, "Before we start," the man droned, "would you like a pornstar alias? I could call you Backdoor Jaegerbomb."

The look Eren gave him after that comment was murderous. He glared forebodingly in between in legs at him and decided to swiftly raise a foot and knock it harshly against Levi's shoulder as a retort. Dumb motherfucker. The brat couldn't get out of bed fast enough.

Levi kneaded his muscle as he studied the magnificent sight of Eren's naked ass saunter towards the bathroom, fuming like a fired pistol, while suppressing the irresistible impulse to chuckle, "If you don't enjoy that I could always call you Little Boy Blueballs," he called after him.

Eren swirled around to face Levi in a heated rage. You could see the anger so plainly scribbled on the mean mug he was bestowing upon his soul. Other than having bodacious sex, Levi's greatest amusement was pestering his lover – so much hotter when he was mad. "Shut the fuck up! Can no one jerk off in peace anymore?" he shouted unapologetically, "That's what people do and you're mocking me for it!"

"Have I ever been one to mock?" Levi inquired jeeringly. That got the kid burning a heavy scarlet in insensible fury. How it entertained his spirit so.

Eren opened his mouth to counter, but instead hesitated with his premeditated foul remark. Don't feed into the bullshit. He curtly waved his hand as if he were batting away a bothersome fly, "You know what? Forget it. I'm taking a shower." A resolute finger was then jabbed in Levi's direction, "Do not follow me."

The older man nodded understandingly and watched the boy disappear into the bathroom. He sighed and submerged his face into the comfort of a linen pillow. From afar, Levi appeared solemn. However, hidden away was an atypical, amused smile.

This brat is just too easy, he thought with an even more atypical chortle.

Hope you guys received a good laugh out of this one. I told you it was to the point. I so badly want to give you hints for the next chapter because I am GEEKED THE FUCK OUT about it. This one scene I'm writing – all of you are going to late 90's fangirl on me. Well…I guess that was a small hint.

Anyways.

Review, follow, favorite. Whatever.

And just a general announcement, I just got finished watching Soul Eater and now I'm wet for Death the Kid and Stein. Expect me to branch out with this ship because I don't even know if it fucking exists, but I'm brewing some shit. Fuck some haters.