Hi.

So, this is late. Obviously. My reasoning behind that is because…I wrote the Drunk Sex segment almost entirely and then realized I fucking hated it. Good thing about this story though is that I don't have to start over. I can just pick another topic to write about. See? Smart. So, instead of Drunk Sex you guys get Road Head. I know one of you was very excited for this chapter. I tried my best. If you wanna know what I wanted to do for Drunk Sex – because I did say you guys were gonna 90's freak on me – I wrote Levi and Eren in a bar and eventually Eren and Connie start dancing to N'Sync's Bye Bye Bye song. Got the idea from a radio show on how dudes would memorize the dance, go to clubs and pick up chicks. I didn't dig it once I wrote it for some reason. I'm trying to think of other angles because I really wanna knock that out of the park.

Anyways, go onward to your reading. Also, at the end I have some future news for you guys.

Chapter 4: The Road Head

"Mikasa, I swear we're on our way. We just left the lot," Eren lied with earnest into his cellphone as he walked out of the lobby of his apartment complex with great hast towards the car. Levi trailed far behind him in a leisure stroll. His urgency to depart was not what you would call enthusiastic. The correct term would be lethargic – buying time with every languid step. Very unlike his boyfriend who was already a league away, phone tucked in between his cheek and shoulder as he spoke expeditiously into the receiver, "Yes, we'll be there in, uh-" Eren droned off mid-sentence and shot a quick, apprehensive glance in Levi's direction for confirmation.

Two lazy fingers were held up in response.

"Twenty minutes," he finished hurriedly, approaching the passenger's side of the black Jeep Wrangler. Ten years old and still purred like a kitten. Her name was Veronica, a title Eren had given the vehicle in high school when he bought it from a shady dealership at the tender age of seventeen. Pulling on the handle, he promptly found that the door was locked. Hand remaining and with an irritated tapping of his toe on the pavement, Eren fired a pointed look at Levi who had the keys in his pocket.

A petty mean mug didn't make him skip along any faster. Eventually, he did reach the driver's side with the key fob jingling in his hand and pressed the unlock button. Beep, beep. And Eren yanked the door open with pronounced force and plopped down on the tatty leather interior. Levi jumped in his seat soon after. Being much smaller than his lover – who was a whopping 6'1" to his measly 5'3" – he had to adjust himself. It pissed him off so much. Three years ago this bastard was a cool six inches shorter than what he was now at twenty-two.

"I know we've had plans for week now," Eren continued in his taxing conversation, listening to his sister practically scolding him on the other end – a little tick she did since they were brats in grade school. "We are not ditching you and Armin, alright? I gotta go. We're about to get on the highway. I'll call you back." Click.

Eren sighed exasperatedly as he tossed his cell in the center console and then slumped down into the backrest. Levi uttered not a word. He simply jabbed the key in the ignition and turned it forward. The moment the Jeep roared to life; he threw it in gear, stepped on the gas and rolled out of the parking lot to the main road. There was definitely a pregnant silence between the two, neither really wanting to state the obvious here. However, someone needed to. Mikasa wasn't reproaching her brother merely because he was running late.

"You do realize I don't want to go out with them," Levi said suddenly as he flipped on his right turn signal.

Eren's reply was crossly – demanding. "It's my sister and my best friend. You have to go." The boy was fairly cognizant of the fact that Mikasa had never really taken a fancy to his poor choices in sexual partners. Including and especially Levi. Which shocked the shit out of Eren since they were both objectively similar people; intelligent, apathetic and fearsome. Perhaps it's because two birds with a set of wings that big can't peacefully be in the same cage together. Or it could be as modest as the common overprotective sibling psychosis that Mikasa always carried on her shoulder. Rightfully so, of course, with Carla dying of lung cancer seven years ago and Grisha being an absentee father. Biological parents she never knew. All foster care ever told her was that her mother was Japanese and her father was French-Canadian. His adoptive sister being a mixed child never fascinated Eren to the point of being insulting. His blood was not pure either. His father was an authentic German while his mother's veins were plentiful with Spanish decent. That's why Eren's skin stayed tan all year – even during the long winter months. Growing up, they were undoubtedly a Heinz 57 family and when it all fell to pieces her lone brother was all Mikasa had left in the world. And vice versa.

Whatever her standing issue with Levi is, it has yet to be spoken from her mouth. In the unknown, they could only speculate the discernible. That he was eleven years Eren's senior. How it seemed underhanded that an established business man would be fucking around with college dropout, as much as that stung. The humble truth that Levi was a no good asshole and did not deserve someone as genuine as her brother. Regardless, the two could not tranquilly co-exist with each other and that made dinner dates rather strenuous as much as Eren forced it on both parties. It was important to him.

Levi – on the other hand – did not know how to play nice. "I don't have to do shit," he countered matter-of-factly, switching lanes so he could take the highway entrance in a mile.

Eren took the comment offhandedly and kept his eyes solidly transfixed on the industrial scenery of the city as it passed by his window. "It is implicit law that my people have to become your people. The Romans did it when they conquered empires. Look it up."

"This is not the Roman Empire. This is dinner."

Eren took a deep yet silent breath, steadying his sharp tone, "Can you at least try to be good?"

"Why should I?" Levi prompted.

He shrugged his shoulders in wonder, "I don't know. Why should I have to deal with your bullshit attitude and cigarette smoke every day?" So much for keeping a dull tongue. It also didn't service Eren any aid that the second the words left his mouth, the snapping sound of a lighter being ignited rang in his eardrums. He reared his head around to the sight of Levi sparking a Marlboro, hand cupped around the tiny and fragile flame as he secured the steering wheel with his right knee. When the man felt Eren's gaze burning holes in his flesh, he froze.

"Sorry, did you say something?"

"You are unbelievable."

Levi pitched his hands out, palms facing upwards and elbows bent in a light-hearted gesture, "I'm joking," he assured.

"I'm serious," Eren affirmed with sincerity. "Don't make this uncomfortable. I understand that you and Mikasa don't…particularly get along-"

"Don't sugar coat it," Levi interjected. "She'd poison me if she had the chance." There was a moment's pause as he inhaled on the filter of his cigarette, allowing the nicotine smoke to facilitate his vexed nerves, "And let me tell you something, Mikasa doesn't hold resentment towards me because I'm some fire-breathing dickhead – it's because I have a penis that I inevitably use to fuck you with."

Thinking about his older sister weighing the dynamics of his sex life made the brat blush a rosy pink that only further proved Levi's point.

"I stand corrected."

"If you plan on acting like a condescending jerk then turn this car around and I'll drive myself," Eren uttered hotly. "I'll tell them you couldn't make it because you had to go have strange whores suck your dick in an alleyway for pennies."

The attack was shallow and left little damage. It only made the corners of Levi's mouth twitch upwards in a dastardly smirk, "I love it when you're feisty."

There was no verbal retort. Just Eren rolling his eyes in annoyance. This evening was going to be a whirlwind of awkwardly clanking silverware and attempting to salvage conversation in frequent bouts of painful silence, he already knew. The only saving grace would be Armin – who when liquored up – was quite the chatterbox. Thank Christ they were going to a restaurant with cheap red wine you could purchase by the bottle. Hopefully they'd all be drunk and merrily singing by the end of the night. However, until that ever happens, Eren would sit in his state of quiet fretting.

Levi considered the boy's sudden reserve with a sideways glance as he accelerated the car up the ramp to merge into high traffic. Honestly, he did feel bad that he and Mikasa had to compel themselves to be cordial to one another for Eren's sake and sometimes they could barely manage that. It wasn't that she meddled or threw out her two cents that no one ever asked for. She was cold in her stare and in her sentences. An ice queen. Levi could handle a bitch. However, he couldn't handle a bitch who did not voice her justifiable qualm for being a bitch. Simple as that. Glimpsing at Eren's scowling face though, how his bottom lip puckered out slightly like a pouting child, charmed him. Even he could be influenced into being amicable by a kid so painstakingly gorgeous.

For a price.

"Tell you what," Levi called over the resilient breeze gusting through the open window, sucking in on his cigarette before flicking it out, "I'll be a good boy, but you have to be my strange whore."

Eren's attention was swiftly pulled away from his musings. His expression was confused until the suggestive statement rang the bells in his brain and then he wore a look of half skepticism, half amusement, "You're kidding me right?"

"Duty calls," there was a brief halt to exhale the last hit from his smoke, "Get to work."

"You want me to give you a blowjob in exchange for a nice evening with my sister?" Eren questioned carefully.

"It's implicit law. I'm sure the Romans did it."

Although he appeared stunned by the erogenous proposition, code of relationship etiquette states that after spending three Thanksgivings together that you should be surprised by nothing anymore. And truly, the idea of road head wasn't a shock, but how abruptly it was insinuated. Not like this was their first rodeo. They've had sex in the back of an Applebee's parking lot in broad daylight once. It wasn't one of Eren's classier moments and neither was this. "I'm not going down on you in the middle of traffic," he avowed.

"On the contrary," Levi persisted. "You are. You owe me remember?"

"I don't owe you anything!"

"Really? Two nights ago?"

As specified, it was indeed two days ago. A rather unproductive Wednesday night of the two of them sitting on the couch and watching old sitcoms with disinterest. That's when Eren indolently cranked his neck to his right with eyes still lingering on the television to ask Levi of a very crucial favor.

"Go to the store. We're out of soda."

"Drink water," was his indifferent reply.

"I don't want water," Eren groaned with distain. "I want carbs!"

Levi absolutely loathed with his boyfriend whined like a petulant brat. Especially when they were relaxing instead of having vivacious sex. That was another story. Cocking his head, he faced the kid with a hard stare, "Do you want another sugar rot? The dentist already had to pull out your back molar last year."

Eren's eyes – those spirited, iridescent irises that were a sea of beautiful shades of green – connected with his and shined with intense longing. "Levi, please?" he begged gently. The way he looked, the way his voice caressed you, could make you weak at the knees, but not those who knew his trickery well.

"No."

"I'll suck your dick if you go get me some Pepsi," he rejoined quickly. As if he was keeping it in his back pocket to freely toss out whenever he deemed it suitable.

Levi clicked his tongue and glowered rigidly, studying his body language. Goddamn it, those fucking eyes. Sighing pensively, he heaved himself up from the soft and inviting sofa cushions and began walking sluggishly towards the door.

"I'll be back."

"When I got home you were asleep on the couch. Time to pay up."

Eren winced inwardly as he recalled the scenario and his bogus promise to give head in exchange for a beverage. As fucking if, but the serious glint in Levi's callous glare had him gulping a nervous lump down his throat. This was not a request and it had his hands instinctively fumbling with Levi's belt. "Fuck it," he grunted, the metal buckle clinking as he jimmied it until unclasped.

Levi kept his eyes bonded on the stretch of highway, but was not inconspicuous about his sneer, "Just think of it this way; I'm making an honest man out of you."

"Shut up," Eren gritted through his teeth, the man's cock already unhampered from the restriction of nicely fitted jeans and in his palm. He started propping himself in a comfortable position and Eren would use that word loosely for there is never a "comfortable position" when it came to going down south in the car, but there was a method to the madness. Left knee braced on the leather seat, right knee bent and the balls of his feet planted firmly on the floor. It gave balance as well as the support for a rocking motion. Not to mention it helped keep his back low as he dropped his head and teased the tip of the member in his grasp.

"No fucking around," Levi announced from above. "You got five minutes."

It was Eren's turn to smirk now, "I'll make you cum in three." That earned a scoff from overhead. However, he quashed that little impertinent conviction as he swallowed Levi's erection whole. A faint gasp resounded that made Eren want to chuckle in triumph, but it was very difficult to articulate with a dick so far in your mouth. Tightening his lips and flatting his tongue underneath, he slowly – and he went excruciatingly slow – sucked firmly from the base, along the shaft and up to the head where he swirled that wet muscle around sensitive skin. Plunging back down, he slackened his jaw and let that succulent cock slip down his throat with ease. Most people think that it's necessary to constrict in order to prevent regurgitation and give a good blowjob simultaneously, but those who say that don't have the durable gag reflex that Eren does. And it was quite durable.

If someone asked Levi what was the first thing about Eren that he fell in love with – and if he felt like being honest – he would said his ability to give a terrific blowjob. Frankly, people don't love for personalities straight out of the gate. They loved for appearances. It's a biological characteristic. A chemical impulse. Before humans had intelligence, they were cavemen. Uncivilized with wild instinct and in modernization it was still the same. Three years ago when Levi caught the sight of Eren in that nameless dive bar – a nineteen year old piece of ass with a bad fake I.D – it was purely physical. They were both too toasted for conversation and Levi's fly was open in the bathroom stall two hours later. In the end, animalistic desire produced a beautiful relationship.

Ancient history aside, Eren never ceased to be the best fuck the man's ever had. Not with such a feral touch and an incredible body, the way he worked his tongue like a graceful instrument.

A bead of sweat formed on Levi's temple and ran down the side of his cheek when that mouth delectably pulled on his member with every dip. The kid might be fiery pistol when he talked, but he was even hotter when performing fellatio and not emitting a single syllable. The only sound you could hear was how he slurped pre-cum and saliva as they began to spill from between his moistened lips. Levi was a trained professional at this by now. His concentration on traffic flow did not stumble even though he had a twenty-two year old sexual deviant wrapped around his hard-on. Though he was beginning to white-knuckle the steering wheel with every fleeting minute.

Eren wanted the man's leg quivering – struggling against his pleasure. A hand crept into the elastic waistband of Levi's underwear that were pulled back just enough to let his member breathe. Fingers grazed through the trimmed patch of coarse black public hair until they touched the delicate, smooth texture of his testicles. Eren cupped them in his nimble grasp and massaged them in his palm while his head continued to heartily bob in his lover's lap.

An electrifying bolt of ecstasy soared from Levi's groin to the very peak of his skull like a sheet of lightning and he impulsively reached down and snagged a fistful of Eren's rich brown hair. He wrestled the urge to let his arms fall and his eyes roll for the exit was coming up on the right in a quarter mile and he needed to mingle his way into an opening. Which he had to catch by racing up to eighty and rapidly cutting off a woman in a sedan. She was not happy and neither was he because the unexpected distraction made him lose the sensation that he was going to climax.

Eren distinguished that the Jeep was decelerating from the momentum. He instantly withdrew himself from his indiscretions to peek over the dashboard to see that they were now in the shopping district – bursting with markets, plazas, fine eateries and regular pubs. Highly populated area. A lot of street lamps and a lot of lighting strung from building to building like a twelve month long Christmas party. Great. "Jesus Christ," Eren griped. "Hurry up!"

Levi moved gradually up to the first stoplight and glanced to his left to ensure he was clear to turn right, "I'm too preoccupied right now."

Shaking his head, Eren disappeared below the windshield to resume his lecherous transgression. He was too riveted in making his boyfriend squirm to care about possible onlookers. He'd being living in sin since he was fourteen years old when he started playing with high school boys. This was not going to be his ticket to swim in an eternal lake of hellfire. The devil handed him that boarding pass a long time ago. Eren tautened his lips once again and consumed Levi's length and all of its entirety. From between his bottom row of teeth and the silky flesh of cock, he poked his tongue out and traced the tip across the crown of the man's balls.

Levi kneaded the heel of his hand against his forehead as his eyelids fluttered, mouth parting open and panting out the stifling air in his lungs. God bless whoever taught this little bastard how to suck a dick, but fuck he just kept teetering on that line between rapture and orgasm, not leaning to one side more than the other. It was absolute torture. They needed to get stationary. Now. Levi zipped through lights well after they flashed red. He cut left turns a little too close. He weaved in and out of the downtown circulation that suddenly seemed painstakingly slow. The time lapse until they finally – finally – veered onto the blacktop of Bugsby's, a low-cost Italian bistro where Mikasa and Armin were most likely waiting already, felt like twenty minutes. When in actuality it only takes about ten minutes to drive from the off-ramp to the restaurant. Levi flew into the first space he saw and recklessly threw the car in park while it was in motion, causing it to lurch and sway on the suspension.

He inclined his back against the seat and released a robust groan, "Alright, finish me off," he ordered breathlessly, leg muscles tensing as Eren contracted that mouth of his – that sweet warmth. It squeezed his erection with just the right amount of gusto, triggering him to ruthlessly buck his hips over and over again. With a hand strong on the back of Eren's head, Levi shoved him down with such vigor that it would be astonishing if he didn't choke and die. An audible retching noise was heard.

Eren's eyes were watering terribly from every impact to the back of his throat. The suffocating appendage was swelling with semen. A few more thrusts and it would perceivably explode. He was such a sick bitch that he couldn't wait for that load to shoot in his mouth. It almost made him forget that they were in the middle of public, children and their parents wandering to their cars with Styrofoam boxes as they recently finished their meals. When Levi spotted the image of an old couple joyously walking their dachshund along the sidewalk five feet away it was nearly enough to shame his boner down.

But not quite. He would burn for that later.

Levi's grip on Eren's thick strands of hair significantly intensified. Until it felt like he was ripping it out at the roots. Sperm gushed from the tip of his cock like a geyser, bottom lip tucked in his teeth to suppress a substantial moan. Eren swallowed the salty fluid like a paid whore and lapped off the excess fervently before wrenching himself free of Levi's clutches. They both sat back in their seats then, winded and gasping for oxygen, basking in the afterglow. Everything was very stagnant. Two sets of eyes joined in the silence and arms were raised. Their hands smacked together in a well-deserved high-five.

"Stay golden, Ponyboy," Levi joked tiredly – drained from his post-orgasm.

Eren let out an exhausted chuckle before glancing down to the protruding bulge in his pants, "Fantastic. Now I need to get off." Which was responded by the feathery touch of fingertips on his jawline. He peeked over to his lover.

"To be continued?"

A weary smile. "Yes, sir," Eren said with a mischievous tone, inclining himself forward to kiss Levi's dry lips with profound earnest. They both exhaled ardently from their noses, tongues casually playing with each other with multiple beats of their drumming hearts before separating. Eren grinned in that innocent manner he always did, "Time for some grub!" he bellowed as he tugged on the handle and opened the car door. Levi merely shook his head as he killed the engine and exited the Jeep himself.

They ambled their way down the row of vehicles in their scandal. Gradually advancing towards the entrance of the bistro with every stride. Levi's chest wasn't so heavy with dread. Now when Mikasa constituted a spiteful comment at dinner, he could contentedly think in his mind "your brother gave me head in the parking lot a few minutes ago" and it would bring him so much joy. He should tell Eren that. He'd get a good laugh out of it. Levi turned to face Eren, ready to initiate a light-hearted banter when in his peripheral vision he found something that made his eyes marginally widen. Instantaneously, he grabbed the boy by the shoulder and towed him quickly in between the remoteness of two cars – one a truck and the other an exceptionally large van. A look of perplexity was etched plainly on his features by the way his eyebrows were arched.

"I can see your boner," Levi remarked discreetly. His voice was guardedly low.

Eren immediately looked down to his engorged crotch with mortification, "Oh, shit! I forgot!"

"Tuck it in your waistband." The brat's hands moved to his faded jeans, fast to pop off the button and then rooting with a particularly troublesome zipper. He grunted in protest while his cheeks flushed a vivid scarlet. Levi folded his arms over his torso and fought to conceal his noticeable smirk, "Hurry up before someone sees you," he taunted.

"I'm trying!" Eren shouted aggregately. After several stout heaves, the fastener gave and he stuffed almost half his forearm in his pants to adjust his aching erection. He clenched his jaw and fixed his gaze to the darkening sky in meditation as he relocated his dick upwards. It was rather relieving. He actually sighed. "I got it," Eren proclaimed a little too loudly as he hurriedly rectified his pants. Levi nodded in approval and when they both spun on their heels to proceed back in the direction from once they came, the two encountered a young couple standing motionless not even a foot behind them with dazed expressions on each of their faces. Levi rounded a cursory glimpse towards Eren who appeared equally if not further traumatized than the strangers who had just witnessed him fooling around with his boner.

Well, this was awkward.

Levi sighed discourteously and stared directly at the horrified individuals, gesturing a thumb towards his idiotic boyfriend, "This is exactly what it looks like." And then he left. Just left. They gawked at him with incredulity as he brushed by them without added explanation.

Eren sure as shit wasn't hanging around either. He sprinted after the man to evade cumbersome confrontation, but he did mouth a meek "I'm sorry" before his shoes kicked up dust behind him. He shortly caught up with Levi, not daring to peek over his shoulder in fear that he'd die of humiliation from the judgmental eyes that were charting his back all the way to the restaurant entryway. "Don't you fucking say anything," he murmured harshly.

"Your secret is safe with me," Levi said as he held open one of the front double doors, permitting Eren to walk in first. Regardless of his chivalry, his tenor indicated that he was trying to smother the unmistakable sound of laughter.

Upon their arrival, they were instantly greeted by the picture of Armin and Mikasa impatiently waiting by the hostess stand. They were not cheerful.

"Took you long enough!" Armin barked across the lobby as the couple paced themselves with care. People could become like rapid dogs when they are imposed into postponing their food. Approach with vigilance or they would chop your hand off at the wrist and chew on your bones for sustenance.

Eren's chuckle was anxious and he scratched the back of his neck even though he didn't have an itch. Nervous habit. "Downtown traffic, ya know?"

Mikasa's glare could cut through steel and those chilling black irises surveyed Eren until the siblings were in arms reach of one another. He refused to look straight at her. His very soul could be vacuumed right out of his body if he did so. Feeling her stare corrode his being to ashes would suffice as he candidly spoke to Armin instead. At some point during their brief conversation, Mikasa squinted her eyelids like she was examining something of great consequence.

"Eren," she called in that stiff tone that always captured his attention and began gesticulating her forefinger in a circular motion around her mouth, "you got something here."

His hand flew to face, eyes flaring wide when the crusty texture of dehydrated splooge grated against his fingertips and started to furiously scrub it clean with his shirt sleeve. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what it was and what was worse was that Mikasa already possessed the brain of one as well as Armin. Eren glanced away sheepishly as his sister and best friend gaped in disbelief. Actually, Armin looked more tickled pink with vile enjoyment.

Fuck this, Levi thought from the sidelines. For the second time that evening, he abandoned his partner to be devoured by vultures. "I'm going to the bathroom."

Armin's smile inched into a manifestation of complete perverted delight as he soaked up the comical display of both a homosexual lovers quarrel and the expression of a pissed of older sister. "Oh-ho," he hooted, clapping his hands and jointly rubbing them together, "I gotta hear this!"

Armin. Sweet, sweet Armin.

Yes, I made Mikasa the asshole. Like every fanfiction ever made where she's the overbearing sister who hates everyone who comes in contact with Eren. I think it's funny, but also I make it work bitch. And she hates Levi in the series anyways. It's canon. Leave it alone. However, I did like the idea of giving Eren some cultural diversity. I always thought Carla was a Spanish name and since Eren's skin is always tan – though he's supposed to be Germanic – got me thinking, "Hey, let's make him have a little Spanish in him."

Hope you all found this funny. This was inspired by true events that have happened to me. Road head can be awesome, however it can be tricky. Cumming while driving is dangerous, kids. I bet they didn't teach you that in driver's ed. And also, am I the only one who offers oral sex to my boyfriend in order for him to do shit for me? Because I do. Everyday.

On a side note, I'm so glad that this story is gaining a lot of reviews and favorites. It's pretty cool, actually. However, just I heads up, in August I will be leaving to study abroad in Switzerland. I'll be gone for four months. Now, I'm not sure if I'm going to put myself on a temporary hiatus because I don't know what my schedule is gonna look like overseas, but I know I'm going to be extremely busy so I probably won't be updating that much. Fear not, I plan to write at least two to three more installments before I go. If you wanna hear about my adventures to parts known, follow me on my tumblr and I will be sharing a lot of my experiences beforehand, during and afterwards. I'm so stoked!

So, thank you so much for reading and stay tuned for the next chapter!