Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I've been busy moving into my new place. I've also had a few health issues and I had to be taken to the ER a few days ago, but I'm feeling a lot better and I can't wait to start writing again. Sorry for an grammar or spelling errors.

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Chapter 4:

As we were stepping into the police cruiser we hear someone yelling at us to stay where we were. So far it has been a sort of epic journey just for me to find my father and now it seems the obstacles will continue. Is it really too much to ask for some alone time with the man that I haven't seen for almost half my life.

"What is it Billy? I'm a little busy right now..."

I swear this man is going to be the death of me. I realize that he is my dad's best friend, but can't he mind his own damn business.

"Char..I mean dad, can we please go home. I really need to talk to you".

He looks at me with what I would call a perfectly trained poker face. I guess years on the force would do that to you.

"Yeah sure Bells", I never thought I would hear someone call me that again. "Just wait in the cruiser for me".

"Thanks dad". For just a moment his carefully put together appearance crumbled and I was able to see the emotion that I saw earlier. It makes me want to go home even more.

By the time I get to the car Billy has wheeled himself to where Charlie is standing...wait wheeled! What happened? How much has changed since I've been gone? How much have I missed?

This is obviously going to be a very defining conversation, so I should go over everything I want to share with dad.

1. Gloss over what I have been doing since I last saw him six years ago.

2. Say that I left school early, started college classes and began working as a nursing assistant because I was getting bored in high school.

3. Mom died in a car accident. No extra details needed.

4. Tell him why I came to stay with him. Well, an edited version anyway…

Hopefully the preparation for this conversation will go more swimmingly than the last one I had with Charlie. I mean really...I have never been one to stutter and now it seems I can't get through a sentence without doing so. Maybe if I….

The slam of the car door pulled me out of my train of thought, but for some reason I was afraid to turn my head. I was afraid to see if the anger that Billy had for me would perhaps rub off on Charlie and I would be sent packing as soon as we got home. But my fears were silenced when I felt his hand grab my own. It felt rough and calloused, but at the same time it felt warm. My mother's hands were always so ice cold. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of comfort from another human being. How long has it been since I have felt this safe with someone?

A gentle squeeze of my hands makes me turn in his direction and all I see is love. The warm sensation has now traveled from my hand to my heart and I pray that I will never live without it again.

"I told Billy that I would call him later. I didn't know if you wanted anyone knowing who you were or not". As he is talking we are slowly backing out of our parking stall and heading towards the road leading to Charlie's house. "You remember Billy don't you"?

"It's hard not to remember him Char...uh, dad. He looks exactly the same except for the wheelchair". And the angry expression. God, I wonder who peed in his cheerios. "But he didn't remember me".

Charlie's response surprises me, because even though he is laughing under his breath there is a look of disgust on his face. "That's for sure. He thought that you were looking for me so that you could…*cough*...persuade me to let you get away with a crime you committed".

"Oh my god! Is that why he looked so disgusted with me? Why would he immediately jump to that conclusion"?!

"It's happened before. He assumed that you were arrested for..solicitation". Well, I guess that explains the look of disgust he had. But seriously, he thought I was a prostitute! What the hell!

"Well, that explains a lot".

This conversation was obviously making Charlie uncomfortable. "Yes, well...how have you been kiddo"?

I knew we would get to this. I can't believe with all my preparation I didn't think about an introduction! How stupid could I be!

"When I was 12 we moved to Arizona and mom worked as a waitress. When I was 15 I tested out of high school and started college courses. While I was taking classes I got certified as a nursing assistant and was working with patients at a nursing home. A few weeks ago mom died in a car accident and while I was going through her things I saw the letters that you wrote us. I thought that I could come and visit you".

By this point I notice that we have been parked in front of his house for the last few minutes. It seems like neither of us wanted to disrupt this moment. If we left the neutral zone of the cruiser and walked into the house, we would be assaulted with past memories. There were good memories like when he would carry me around the house and call me his princess. But then there were bad memories, like when my mom had pulled me out door and out of the life I had always known.

"Do you want to come inside? We can get you set up in your old room and maybe we could order pizza"?

He looked so nervous, so uncertain. It strangely made me more at ease knowing that I was not the only one who was scared.

"Yeah, let's do that".

The walk to the house was as awkward as I imagined it would be. But it was nothing compared to stepping into the house, or should I say a time capsule, because nothing had changed since I had last seen the house all those years ago. The kitchen was still painted the tacky yellow color that my mother chose in hope to make the space more cheery. All of my class pictures were on full display. This was especially embarrassing considering I had been a pale, skinny, freckled child until I was 13. Thank god for puberty!

"I don't know if you remember where your room is at Bells, but if you will follow me I can show you".

He made a clumsy motion with his thumb, jerking it towards the stairs until he put his hand down and quickly ran up the stairs. I tried to follow him at the same speed, but as usual I trip while going up the stairs and land on my knees on the top step of the staircase.

"Are you ok Bells"?

"Yeah", I can't help but groan a little as I pull myself up, "I should be ok. Which way it the room again"?

At Least now I know where I get klutziness from.

He opens the door at the end of the hall and again everything is the same. The yellow curtains are covering the window; blocking the non-existent sun from coming into the room. My single bed is still pushed against the wall and the rocking chair that I had when I was a baby is still in the corner. It makes me wonder why he never changed this room into an office or a workout room.

"The bathroom is at the top of the stairs, you already knew that when we passed it".

I can tell he is getting uncomfortable because he is shifting from on foot to the other, but considering the day he's had I suppose this is to be expected.

"My bedroom is on the other end of the hall. I'm gonna go downstairs and order the pizza. You can get set up and come back downstairs, or you can stay here...but you don't have to stay up here. You can sleep or go downstairs and watch tv. Either way, I'll call you when the pizza gets here and you can come downstairs and eat...or you can stay up here...ugh...I'll just go downstairs..uh, bye".

Talk about nervous. I lost track of how many times he said the word "downstairs". I look around the room and all I can think is, 'What do I do now'?

The rest of the night went a lot easier. When the pizza came we talked about his life in forks, his friends, his job. When it came to me I kept things close to the vest but I was glad when he started asking about my major. That's one aspect in my life that I could talk all about without being worried of saying too much.

"I have an associates degree in criminal justice and I was going to start looking for a position as a 911 operator".

I wish I had a camera so I could capture the pride that shown on his face when I told him I was going into the same field that he was in.

"I can check if we are looking for one at the station. This is great Bells"!

When we looked at the clock and realized in was 1 o'clock in the morning we decided to call it a night.

As we reached the top of the stairs and were about to go to our opposite sides of the hallway, we turned to look at each other and it's like we both came to the realization that we were finally in each others lives.

"I'm glad you're here Bella. I've missed you".

He hugged me again, and it was like he was trying to hold me there for the rest of my life.

"I love you Bella"!

I can't believe this is happening! I'm so happy I can barely breath! In fact, I can feel a sob in the back of my throat and for once I don't fight it. I'm so in the moment I don't care how I might look right now! Thank you God!

"I love you too dad"!

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