Walking away from a bemused looking Castle, Kate couldn't help the grin on her face. He might have acted exactly as she had imagined he would, but there was one thing she hadn't been counting on - the look in his eyes telling her he was still in love with her. It had been obvious the second he opened the door and saw her standing there and the relief that had flooded through her at that point had given her the motivation to go through with it, even though he acted like he didn't want to know.

She couldn't blame him, she'd hurt him, she knew that and he definitely wasn't wrong to try and protect his heart, it was only to be expected. But now that she'd seen him, now that she knew his feelings were still there, Beckett knew she had to carry on. Take however long it took to get through to him, until he realised she was in it for the long haul.

So tomorrow, after they'd both got some rest and let the events of the day settle in, she'd go and see him again and begin her plan to convince Castle he needed her in his life.

Castle didn't know what to think or do. Beckett turning up here had been the last thing he ever expected, he honestly thought that if she ever actually read that letter, she'd take his words at face value and he'd never see her again. He shouldn't be so surprised really, her whole career was based on reading between the lines to discover the truth, really that's what she was doing now. And even if he'd never admit it to her in a million years, he was glad she was here, it told him that she hadn't given up just yet, despite his insistence that he didn't want her around.

He'd spent the whole duration of her visit trying to play it cool, pretend as if he didn't need or want her here and he had to say, when she'd walked away with her sassy comment about not believing him, he had been a little annoyed. After putting so much effort into being so disinterested, her throwing it back in his face wasn't what he'd anticipated.

If he was honest with himself, half of his anger had dissipated the second he'd opened the door to find her standing there. The fact that she'd come all this way to talk to him made his heart swell, not only for himself and their relationship but for what it meant about her - would Kate Beckett of three years ago have dropped everything to fly off and see her partner, not knowing if they even wanted to see her? No, he didn't think so.

But none of that mattered now anyway, he'd let her day her piece and she was probably on the next flight back to JFK. One thing ate at him though - he'd never asked her how she'd got his address from Alexis.

"Yo, Beckett, you and Castle back in the city yet?"

"Not yet, Espo," Kate sighed. "Let's just say he wasn't exactly pleased to see me."

"So what, you're just giving up?" Espo asked flatly, a hint of disappointment in his voice.

If he were here and not three thousand miles away on the end of the phone, Beckett would have rolled her eyes at him. "No, Espo, I'm not giving up. This is me you're talking to, remember?"

"Yeah yeah, I guess you're right, blame it on lack of sleep." Given that it was currently 2am New York time, Beckett was almost glad of being away from it all, those early morning body drops were not her favourite.

"Catch a good one?"

"Not sure yet," Espo replied. "Lanie's starting the autopsy first thing so then we should have an ID and cause of death. Want us to call when we're there?'

"Er..yeah, please," she smiled. She could still do her job from the other side of the country. "I've gotta get some sleep, speak to you later."

"Later, Beckett."

Stretching out in bed, Beckett luxuriated in the comfiness of the pillows for a few more moments before hauling her body into the shower. Today marked day one of her 'get Castle back' plan and she aimed on starting early.

A good nights sleep had cleared her head, made it obvious what she had to do - stick around until he realised what was best. He might say he wasn't interested but Beckett knew that wasn't true, and she wasn't leaving until Castle knew it too.

Knocking on Castle's door for the second time in as many days, Beckett couldn't decide if she was more nervous now than yesterday. When she'd been here yesterday, she hadn't known what his reaction would be but now she knew he didn't want her here, and she was still here anyway.

"Beckett!" Castle said as he answered, in a very similar way to how he'd answered just yesterday when he'd seen her.

"Morning, Castle," she replied brightly, breezing through the open door and into his apartment.

"I..what are you doing here?" He asked shell shocked. Shouldn't she be back in New York by now?

"Didn't we have this conversation yesterday?" Beckett replied sassily. "Oh, here," she added, handing him one of the coffees she was currently holding. "Figured I owed you about 80, consider this number one."

Castle couldn't help but smile. "Thanks." Coffee wasn't just coffee for them, they both knew that. Everyday for the past three years, he'd brought her a cup of coffee in the morning, and soon it had been more than that. The smile on her face when he handed it to her never got old, he lived for that smile every morning. It was almost his way of saying I love you without speaking the words, and now she was returning the favour.

"You're welcome. So, do you have plans today?"

"Um, no?" He didn't, Gina wanted the next chapter of his newest novel by tomorrow but even spending time with Beckett outweighed any possibility of him writing.

"Great!" She replied brightly. "I'm a tourist in this city and I need someone to show me around!"

She was giving him that smile. Her coy little 'I-know-what-this-smile-does-to-you-so-I'm-going-to-use-it-to-get-what-I-want' smile. And dammit, it was working, how could he say no to a face like that?!

"Okay fine," he agreed. "I'll spend the day with you playing tourist, batting our way through the crowds of people and eating ice cream on the beach." He rolled his eyes as he said it but truthfully he was kind of delighted. After the way he'd acted towards her yesterday, she had every right to get back on a plane and never contact him again but she hadn't. She was still here and it made his heart swell with happiness.

"You just agreed because of the prospect of ice cream," she teased.

He gave her a tight lipped smile at how well she knew him.

"Do you want to stay for dinner?" The words were out of Castle's mouth before his brain even had a chance to filter them. The two of them had just got back after a busy day exploring the sights of LA. They'd had a good day, hadn't argued more than they usually did, both of them seeming to forget what had happened in the past. It was playing on Castle's mind a little though, no matter how good a day they'd had and how well they'd got on today, nothing had changed. He was still angry at what had happened, one good day didn't erase that. But what was really worrying him was what Beckett thought, he didn't want her to think this changed things between them, even if he was asking her to stay for dinner.

"I uh..yeah, that would be lovely, thank you." It beat going back to her hotel and ordering room service to eat on her own, anyway. Today had been better than she could have ever expected, Castle had almost been back to his old self, laughing and joking with her just like old times. She didn't want to get her hopes up, but it was looking as if they might be able to move past this and have a future together.

"Great," Castle replied easily, heading into the kitchen to begin preparing food. He'd have to bring up his concerns over dinner, the last thing he wanted was to lead her on and he couldn't have her leaving here thinking there was something where there wasn't.

They moved around the kitchen together as if they'd been doing it for years, working in a practised unison that would cause an outsider looking in to think they were a married couple.

It was just a simple dinner of spaghetti bolognese, but after a day outside in the sun, breathing in all that salty sea air, Beckett had to admit it smelt extremely appetising.

"Thanks for today, Castle," she said as they sat down to eat. "I know you didn't have to and how angry you were that I was here but thank you."

What did he say to that? He'd just been about to bring up that she couldn't think this meant anything and she went and said that. "You're welcome," he replied politely. Well, he still had manners, after all.

"Okay," she said pointedly, putting her cutlery down and pushing her plate away. "Why do I get the feeling there's something you want to say?"

He forgot how well they knew each other, made him wonder really how he'd managed to miss that she was lying that day in the hospital when she'd told him she didn't remember. "You're right," she sighed, "there is something I want to say and it really shouldn't be this hard given all the crap I said to you yesterday but no matter what's happened, I don't ever want to hurt you intentionally."

That struck a nerve. "You do know nothing I ever did was to hurt you intentionally, right?" She half whispered. "I know I have hurt you but it was.." She struggled to find the right words. "With the best intentions? No, that's not right.."

"I get what you mean," he interrupted. "You never went out with the aim to hurt me like you did, I know that."

"So just say whatever it is you want to say, Castle, I think we're way past keeping things in order to not hurt the other now." There was no way they could ever move forward if they didn't just spit out what they needed to say, it was one of the biggest flaws in their relationship and the miscommunications in the past had got them into this huge mess now.

Castle left the table, taking both of their plates to the kitchen and Beckett followed him, taking her glass of wine with her. She was curious as to what he wanted to say, but she couldn't deny the small scattering of butterflies fluttering about in her belly, anxious at what he was about to say would do to them.

"Today doesn't mean anything," he blurted out, dropping the plates into the sink.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean..it doesn't change anything. I'm still angry at you and none of that is going to change just because we had a good day together. Okay, yeah, maybe I'm being a bit childish but that's just the way it is. I think today has proved we can still get along and I'm not going to lie, it was fun today, I don't think we even had a day like that back in New York, but nothing else will ever happen between us, it's not like that anymore."

Beckett was silent for a few minutes, taking in what Castle had just said. It hurt, that she would admit but it was only what she deserved. She had no idea what possessed her to do it but the next thing either of them knew, Beckett had hoisted herself up on tiptoes, cupped his face in her hands and pressed her lips to his in a passionate kiss.

It took Castle a few seconds to realise what was happening, but after allowing himself a few precious moments to indulge in the heavenly softness of her lips, he grasped her wrists in his hands and pulled her away from him.

"It's not like that anymore, Beckett," he repeated quietly, faces still just inches apart. He could have sworn he could see the moment her heart broke at his words but there was something else there, a steely look of determination in her eyes that told him she wasn't giving up. Oh hell, he was screwed.

twitter - holaitsjade

tumblr - stanaabanana