Chapter Ten – Dirges
"So JJ and I cross referenced some places on the map and found some areas that might be okay to travel…" Freddie must sense how oblivious I'm being, for he abruptly stops talking and grabs me by the wrist.
"Naomi, you're not listening, are you?" Freddie loosens his grip on my wrist, and drops it once he knows he has my attention.
"I uh.."
"Look, I know things are complicated back home, but you have to keep it together until we get back. We're out here, in broad daylight. You know the dangers. Where we're gonna go is incredibly populated, so there won't only more chances of walkers, but humans too. We've discussed what people are like nowadays."
"Yes, I'm aware-"
"-No, you're not. And it's this sort of ignorance that's gonna get us killed. The world isn't like it used to be. You can't trust people anymore. Everyone is out for themselves. If anything, they'll do things to you that you don't want to think about, just because you're a woman. So just.. Naomi, please. We have to work together, yeah? Otherwise there's no chance of returning alive, let alone getting anything." I digest what he is saying, and slowly nod at the information. I suppose he is right. I haven't exactly encountered any other people besides the gang, so who knows what it's like in this world now and what means people will go to just to survive. It makes me shudder.
"We went over this at the shed and as we were walking, but something tells me you weren't exactly paying attention." I look shyly at Freddie as he sighs lightly and presents me with his map; it has lines, words and such on it. He illustrates with his hand as he shows me.
"This is where we are, and this is where we're gonna go. JJ marked off places that could have medicine, so we're just gonna have to go to each of them until we find some. It's quite a distance, and will more than likely take a day, maybe more, so we're gonna have to assess our situation once the sun starts to set and look for any places we can camp out. Have to be on high alert, okay? Now let's go, we're wasting time."
We continue on, and the journey is long and difficult, more so because I see no end in sight unlike when we usually go out to get things. We encounter a few walkers on the way, but we manage to sidestep them and carry on, saving precious ammo and time. I don't know how many paths and roads we have travelled now, but it's slowly taking its toll on my body, starting with my back. I feel it spread right down to my legs, and I stumble a few times, my hands holding onto the straps of the heavy bug-out-bag. Freddie must equally feel the weight of our trip as he comes to a slow stop, which I comply with. We breathe deeply and assess the area, our eyes scanning the perimeter to watch for any sign of a threat.
"Well, it's getting dark now, and we're more than 75% there."
"75%? Why are you calculating with percentages?"
"It's just how I do things, yeah." I roll my eyes and keep looking around, trying to decide which house would be best to stay in for the night. I sigh and give up, turning to look at Freddie as I clutch the handles of the bag.
"Well we should see about staying at one of these, though which one is entirely up to you." Freddie looks at the selection of houses and nods at one with its door open.
"Looks abandoned, should at least check it out?"
"Sure." We cautiously head in the direction of the house, noting its infinite stillness. As we walk up to the pathway and into the house, I see Freddie point to me and then indicate with his head to the visible staircase as he points to himself and nods to the direction of the living room. With a slight grumble I agree, watching as he closes the front door quietly behind us, and then walks off into the lounge as I walk up the stairs as quietly as possible. I reach behind me and pull out my gun, making sure the safety cap is off and that the silencer is connected. I keep the gun at a distance and clock on to the number of rooms, and whether their doors are open – they are not. I notice one room at the top of the banister and then two others on the other side. I take one room at a time, opening it slowly as not to alert whatever may be behind the door. The first I encounter is a main bedroom with its belongings seemingly taken; and by belongings I mean private necessities which would not be visible on first glance. It's how the wardrobe is open and how the frames are empty that determine how the openers of this house were quick to leave, but not without their stuff - much like my family. I feel my eyes close before I quickly open them again, knowing that I can't dwell on that, especially at this time. I turn around and close the door and move onto the other rooms. I find an empty games room of sorts, and then a bedroom that seemingly belonged to some girls, with their pink room and bunk beds. It immediately makes me think of Emily and Katie, and I can't help but imagine what they were like when they were younger; or rather, Emily. It makes me smile to think of how sweet and innocent she would look, forced to wear terrible attire to appease their twin obsessed mother.
A noise downstairs brings me out of my daze and I turn on my heels to swiftly close the door, taking the stairs two at a time. I make it into the lounge and then into the dining room, not finding Freddie anywhere. My senses begin to override me as I worry yet before I can feel truly alarmed, I see Freddie casually emerge from the kitchen.
"All clear down here." I lower the gun and exhale, shooting him a death glare. He frowns slightly at the sight of me.
"What?"
"Freddie.."
"Yeah?" We settle upstairs with our bags, resting in the main bedroom which has a double bed. He lies on one side as I lie on the other, resting against the headboard, eating some food from a can. I happen to be having some very stimulating chicken soup as Freddie consumes some vegetable soup, all the while being entirely cold.
"Cook… Why didn't he tell me about you?" He sighs and puts his spoon into the tin.
"The only reason I can think of is the same as to why I never told my friends about Cook. It's not that he doesn't mean anything to me and JJ, but.. He's our past, you know? We used to always get in trouble, and once he got locked up for selling drugs, we just drifted apart. But like any friends when we grow up together, you find your way back. Doesn't mean you're best friends, nor does it mean you're the least – you just are."
"But in that cabin.. 'blood brothers forever'?" I hear Freddie chuckle and pick up his spoon to resume eating. After a few mouthfuls, he places it back in the tin.
"Yeah, we were optimistic back then, you know? Three Musketeers, in it together, thought that nothing could tear us apart. But no matter how much we tried to be in it and to protect each other, Cook just always seemed to invite danger. We tried to help - not that we were innocent, mind you; you've seen my spliffs." He shoots me a wink and plays with the spoon, swirling the soup around.
"But it just got heavier as the years went on, and when we were just about to enter our final year of school, he got caught selling drugs and got sent down, as a minor but still, had to be sent to some young offenders unit to do time, especially with his track record of other offenses. We just… We weren't enough to keep him on the narrow. But you are, Naomi." He turns to me, his can of soup now resting on the bedside table.
"I spoke to him several times after he got out, was about the start of college and he was saying how he met these people, this 'Blondie', 'mysterious girl, Effy' and 'cracking Gina'. It's obvious you guys matter to him, Naomi. And that you're enough to keep him on track. Just because he didn't mention us doesn't make his friendship to you any less real, yeah?" I place my own soup down and lay on my back, trying to get comfortable.
"So, what's going on with you and Emily, eh?" I exhale loudly and turn onto my side, forcing my eyes shut. I block everything out, and I succeed, if only for a little while.
We're getting close to our destination now, and the anticipation is out of this world. I have no idea what to expect and I don't think Freddie does either. We head down the road, noting the buildings and the sheer vastness of the area.
"Definitely near the centre now, so we gotta be extra careful. Home in on the anything that may hold medicine; supermarkets, chemists, the like. If not, we'll play our hand at the warehouses. Let's go." We continue on, and after a few minutes we find ourselves in the city – stores upon stores. It brought some relief until I see a huge crowd of walkers not far off.
"Shit, Freds-"
"Yeah, I see them. It looks like we can't go any further down this way. Did you see anything on your way in?" I try to remember the stores we passed, and think carefully, allowing my eyes to roam back as I do.
"There was a Tesco Metro, but otherwise.."
"It's worth a shot. We're gonna have to go another way and see about other places." We head back and see about the Tesco Metro, but it becomes apparent as we enter that the looters got been here before us, with all the empty shelves and broken items scattered on the floor. It makes me sigh as we head into the pharmacy area which consists of only a small section, and is noticeably like the rest of the place, empty. I feel tempted to shoot something just because I'm angry, until I ponder.
"We can try the back?" We do and unlike last time, our luck is no longer valid. The door lies on the floor, evidencing a forced entry. The room is terribly scarce and void of what we need, which only serves to irritate me more.
"Fuck."
"Don't give up, alright? We've got plenty of places to try out yet." I nod reluctantly and follow Freddie out, being vigilant of my surroundings. It only clicks as we walk for a while of a place that may be stocked full with medicine.
"How about Boots? Boots is around here somewhere, I swear." As I speak, we see a Boots in sight.
"Yes." I can't contain the excitement as we head in there hoping against all hope that a place like Boots may have been forgotten, purely because it's not one for much importance anymore. But who knows, maybe that's been raided beyond repair too? We see a few walkers in the distance and quickly run into the store, desperate to avoid them. We produce our guns and head on in, wary of everything. I put my gun into the back of my trousers as I notice a walker with his back to me, not wanting to waste ammo when I can manually execute its life. I retrieve my knife, and as I approach him he turns around about to create some god awful sound that only the dead can understand, but I rapidly bring my knife forward and drive it into his head. I watch as it happens, and for the first time, I feel nothing. If anything, I feel rage, though I'm not sure who it is aimed at exactly; the dead or the living. I pull my knife out of his head and watch as he slumps to the floor. Freddie turns to look at me and shoots me a devious smile. I exhale and continue down the aisle, my eyes looking for signs that will indicate the pharmacy section. As to be expected, there is hardly anything, but for once there are a few boxes that remain on the shelves.
"Freds, what about these, are they any good?" He produces a list and after a minute of looking solidly at it, he sighs and shrugs his shoulders.
"Fuck it, whatever there is, it can't hurt." He then grabs them and puts them into his bag, all 3 of them. We scan the rest of the shelves until we fortunately come across several more and bag them.
"We should try the stock room, yeah? It's worth a shot?" He nods like always and moves towards the back of the store. We soon arrive to see the doors that lead to the back, but as Freddie tries to open them, we find that it's locked - which can be a good thing. I involuntarily close my fingers on my left hand as I wield the bloody knife in my right, bracing myself for what's to come. He turns to me with an expectant grin and aims his gun at the door, shooting at the lock. He then kicks it open and I find myself holding my breath as it reveals the room. He fetches a torch from his bug bag and swiftly throws it to me. I aim it gingerly into the room as he aims his gun into the room, waiting for something to happen. As the light fills parts of the room I swear it feels like déjà vu, for the room is miraculously filled with products. Seriously, are people that stupid…? Or is the world just full of dead walkers now that there's no one else out there? I'm not sure whether to be happy or sad with surprise. Freddie however emits a sound I've never heard before, one full of glee and excitement, similar to the one he made the last time we discovered goods.
"Yes!" He heads straight into the room as I move in behind him, wiping my knife on a cloth and putting it away.
"Clearly people don't have the brains to stick around and actually check the entire place. Seriously, who the hell have we been left with in this world; the Jeremy Kyle rejects?" I snort at Freddie's remark as we scan the items. It's a rather big place, and so it takes us a while to find our way around. After much time and getting items that we shouldn't – but do anyway because we can – we find the medication section; vast and untouched.
"Christ. We've really hit the jackpot with this one, Freds."
"This.. Naomi you've… We've enough here to seriously last years and years, maybe even more than years!" He breathes deeply to calm himself and turns to smile at me.
"You've been nothing but good luck since we've found you. You really are part of our family, Nai; believe that." I smile at this as he brings out the list of items that we will need. Boxes upon boxes upon boxes. So many that we just end up taking all of them and more. Even though they're not a cure for what JJ has, they will go a long way in managing it. And hell, all of these pills may end up one day helping us with any flu's or sickness' we experience. It's all important, and it's all needed. We practically fill our bags and throw away the things we won't need now we can head back, making it so that we can carry more for less. Once it is done, and we feel ready, we head back out.
"You know, this was a lot easier than I thought it would be. Had I known we would had of done this before. Guess I was so worried about what may happen in the city centre that I totally ruled it out. Anyway, we should be able to get home by tomorrow. Let's see about covering a lot of ground, staying somewhere for the night, and then hopefully be home by midday tomorrow." I look up into the sky and feel relieved. Partly because this trip was getting fretful, but mainly because I would really like to see Emily. I didn't know it was possible to miss someone this much. I have been missing my family up until now, and to have this feeling rival that feeling is beyond strange, though I suppose with her parting words, they have touched a chord.
I suddenly feel stiff as I hear a noise from the distance, and quickly look down to see what it is. Freddie and I come to a stop as we see something that I did not expect to see at all now, if ever again – people. Not walkers, people. There are three of them, all male, as they move together down the pavement. They seem to be holding objects of some kind, be it gun or knife, I'm not entirely sure, but Freddie does not want to find out. He goes to grab my arm and pull me into a nearby looted store but it's too late, their eyes are already on us.
"Well looky what we have here, eh?"
"Little boy and girl come out to play."
"Let us see what's in those bags, ya." It's all happening at once but before I can even move an inch, they're in front of us, close enough to intimidate me. They're grown adults of varying statures and features. One shorter guy who is roughly my height, stands in front of the other two with his blue eyes and brown hair. His ragged clothes are dirty as he holds a gun. I look to the crones that stand slightly behind him, holding blades of some sort. They sort of look like twins, which reminds me of the twins that reminds me of Emily. Oh Christ, Emily. No, I need to return. I need to- I have to confess….. I do want-
"Hey love, how about you put that mouth to good use and suck my-"
"Don't you finish that fucking sentence, mate." I sense Freddie's aggravation even more as he aims his gun at one of them. It's enough to distract Freddie from the main guy who swiftly puts his gun in his trousers and jerks forward, kicking Freddie in the groan. I go to make a move but think better of it as Freddie lowers the gun. The guy then gets Freddie into a headlock and takes his gun, as one of the twins takes the bag from his shoulders. The guy chuckles as he plays with the gun like a kid.
"Nice gun you 'ave, mate." He then aims it at Freddie and looks to me.
"Now, you can either give me your bag or your friend 'ere will get it, comprende?" I look to Freddie and then the guy, trying to decide what to do.
"You ain't got all day, love. Maybe we'll even show you an alright time if you're a good little girl. Give you a right seeing to." Their eyes bore into mine like disgusting men on a Saturday night, but this time without any chance of getting away from such vile advances. And well, there's no police around to help us out now, is there? I look to Freddie who stares at me with an intense look.
"End of days, yeah. Katie was right."
"What the fuck is he talking about? Shut him up." One of the twins kicks Freddie, who doubles over with the blow.
"End of the days, Naomi."
"I said shut up!" The main guy looks down, and it's enough. I blindly reach for my gun which is lodged into the back of my trousers and yank it out, aiming at the guy. I haven't time to think, be steady or even breathe before I instinctively press the safety lock off and shoot. It happens so quickly, I haven't time to see whether I actually shoot him squarely. I turn to one of the guys to his side and see his face etched with surprise as I press the trigger again, releasing another bullet that I see effectively hit inbetween his eyes. I then turn to the remaining guy and fortunately see Freddie alive and very much on the guy, a knife in his hand, struggling with the guy before winning the battle with a fatal stab wound. In all of this commotion, I notice several walkers making their way over to us.
"Freds, we've got to go! Are you okay to walk?"
"Yeah." He drops the blade and makes a grab for his bag, groaning as he puts it on. He then goes to move away but remembers his gun, and reaches down for it, kicking the guy.
"Asshole." I grab Freddie's arm and pull him away.
"Come on! We haven't got time." We jog and get away just in time. I do a double take of the scene and see the walkers stop at the guys, and hear a scream ring out from the guy who Freddie was struggling with. He was clearly not dead when we left him, but as I dart my eyes back to the pavement, he soon will be – though not as dead as he would have hoped.
"Fucking hell, that was crazy."
"You're telling me." We're so alert and on edge as we walk, looking at every store and building, watching for any walkers or people. I feel my hand shake as I hold the gun, and decide to put it away, turning the safety lock on. I see that Freddie is much the same, his hand grasping his gun.
"Freds, you should probably put that away, we're okay now."
"No, you can never be too careful."
"Freddie, it-" Before I can even finish, a shadow catches my eyes in the distance. It seems like a lone walker down the street. But what strikes me as odd is how it is crouching and trying to hide. I turn to Freddie to question what it is, but he already has his gun raised and aiming at it, his hands trembling still. I look back to the walker and try to get a better look. I strain my eyes, and notice how the long dark curls cascade over the face, shielding it from being known.
Then, like some sort of slow motion scene, the person looks up and I see piercing blue eyes stare back at me.
"Eff..?" There's a pause and nothing happens, until I remember Freddie and what he is about to do.
"Freddie, no!" I reach out and push him but it's too late as he's already taken the shot. And as I turn to look back at Effy, I see that she's no longer there but on the ground.