Sasuke again found himself in another of what had become routine counseling sessions with Gaara. He had been up rather late the night before and bowed his head in exhaustion. "I am so...tired...," Sasuke moaned.
"Geese Sasuke, how late did you stay up last night? You look awful."
Sasuke looked up at Gaara with a somewhat mischievous smile "5:30...in the morning."
"And...that's a good thing?"
"It was a good night. Naruto came over and we did nothing but-"
"Sasuke!" Gaara interrupted. "I don't want to know what you and Naruto do at night. Why didn't you just sleep in later if you were that tired?"
"I did for a little while. I mean, I was pretty exhausted but I woke up about an hour later. Naruto was still asleep."
"You two haven't even been going out for a week and your already sleeping together."
"If you want to call it "sleeping," sure. We're a very passionate couple ya know?"
"Yes! I do!" Gaara stated in an irritated tone. "I'll have you know that I don't live that far away and my walls are paper thin. I have to blast my stereo to 50 to drown you two out!"
"Y...you can hear us?" Sasuke asked, surprised.
"Unfortunately, yes! Your lucky no one else lives around there."
"Well, your welcome to join at any time."
"For the last time, I was never, I am not now, and I will never be gay."
"You don't know what you're missing," Sasuke replied as he sat back against the couch smiling and closing his eyes.
"Nor do I want to know. By the way, why was Naruto yelling at you the other day about not dying his hair red?"
Sasuke opened his eyes and sat up again. "Uh...we...we were playing out each others sexual fantasies."
"...I had to ask."
"Don't you want to know what my fantasy is?"
"No I don't want to know what your fantasy is!"
"It involves you," Sasuke replied in a slightly seductive tone.
"See, now why? Why did you have to tell me that?" Gaara asked. That was far more then he needed to know.
"I told you, I can't help it. Your just so attractive."
"Yes, well that doesn't mean much coming from a guy."
"But I'm a gay guy."
"Not the same thing...and since when are you so confident about being homosexual?"
"Since I found another gay ninja I can share sweet, passionate gay sex with," Sasuke smiled.
"More than I needed to know, and...isn't Naruto bi?"
"Technically, but he's gay when he's with me."
"...Touché."
"And I must say, for a loser ninja he's pretty good in bed."
"Could you please keep your homosexual experiences, thoughts and fantasies to yourself?" Gaara asked in annoyance.
Sasuke then walked up to Gaara's desk. "You know you like it."
"No. No I don't," Gaara stated plainly as he stared coldly at Sasuke attempting to warn him to back off.
Sasuke leaned over the desk ignoring Gaara's comment. "And I know you think it's hot," he said seductively as he had many times before.
"No I don't, and if you come any closer you'll be taking your last breaths."
"Oh come on Gaara. Give me a chance at least." Sasuke then walked around the desk and started to lean in towards Gaara.
Gaara quickly activated his absolute sand defense.
"Hey, that's not fair," Sasuke pouted, leaning against Gaara's sand.
Gaara then sent spikes in the form of the sand viciously towards Sasuke.
Sasuke quickly backed away. "Whoa, no need to get hostile. Come on, I'm sure Naruto won't mind. We've discussed having a threesome before."
"Except I'm not gay!! If I had a threesome it'd be with two girls!" Gaara yelled thorough his sand barrier.
"How can you say you don't like it when you've never given it a chance?"
"No thanks, I'll pass!"
"Once won't kill you."
"It might."
"Anal sex isn't lethal."
"I am not participating in any sexual activities involving you or Naruto...or the two of you together!!...or with any other guy for that matter!!"
Just then Naruto walked into the office. "Sasuke, what the hell is taking you so long?! You said you'd be out of here like a half hour ago!"
"Uh...," Sasuke struggled to explain himself as he stared blankly at Naruto.
"Oh God, now I have to deal with both of them." Gaara replied with dread.
"Um...Sasuke? Why is Gaara here?" Naruto asked in confusion.
"Gaara's my councilor."
"Oh...uh...why has he covered himself with his sand?"
"I was trying to get him to partake in a threesome with us."
"Not working is it," Naruto stated as he folded his arms.
"...Uh...I'm working on it."
"Hmph. I find it absolutely amazing how if you had the chance you'd rather screw Gaara then me," Naruto replied in a bitter tone.
"What?! No! I...It's not like that Naruto!"
"Oh, really?" Naruto asked inquisitively.
"Yeah." Sasuke then walked up to Naruto and placed both his hands on his shoulders. "Come on Naruto, I love you." He stated lovingly as he leaned in to kiss Naruto.
Naruto backed away. "No. You can't just fix everything with a kiss and seductive stare."
Sasuke then leaned in close to Naruto whispering in his ear. "But that's only the beginning."
Naruto angrily pushed Sasuke away. "No! I've had enough of you and your Gaara fantasies!"
"Um...this is awkward...I'm still in the room ya know?" Gaara still sat behind his sand feeling rather awkward in the situation.
"It doesn't mean anything Naruto. Why do you always have to be so damn jealous!" Neither Sasuke or Naruto paid any attention to Gaara's comment.
"What?!"
"Every time I turn my head you're accusing me of fondling some other guy!"
"Ok, that's it! No sex for you tonight," Naruto said plainly as he turned his back to Sasuke crossing his arms.
"Wait! Naruto! That's not fair!" Sasuke pleaded.
"It's your own fault. That's what you get." Naruto then mumbled "Selfish ass!" angrily below his breath.
"Naruto...come on, you can't do this to me?!" Sasuke begged.
Naruto then turned to face Sasuke. "Oh, can't I?"
"But I waited so long for-"
"I don't care. You should've thought of that before you tried to cheat on me behind my back!"
"But I didn't..."
"But you would of."
"But...no! I'll do anything! Please Naruto! I need sex!" Sasuke continued begging desperately.
"Don't you ever think of anyone but yourself?! I...I...ulghh!...Why do you have to make this so hard?! I love you Sasuke, you know I do but do you ever stop to think about how I feel or what I need?!"
"Naruto, I...I'm sorry..." Sasuke replied realizing he had actually hurt Naruto.
"No your not! You just want sex."
"Oh come on! How do you expect me to apologize when you won't believe me?!"
"I will believe you, when you apologize!"
"Whatever, you like the sex just as much as I do," Sasuke stated confidently.
"Not tonight. I'm too freakin' pissed at you to even sleep in the same bed!"
"Now I know your lying."
"No Sasuke! I'm not! Your not getting in my pants when I know all your thinking of is him!!"
"Uh...hi...still in the room." Gaara stated, feeling even more awkward. However, he was still being ignored by both of them.
"Naruto, you're being unreasonable!" Sasuke argued.
"No I'm not! I am not your sex toy!!"
"Your not?" Sasuke replied with arrogance.
Naruto then slapped Sasuke across the face.
"Ow..."
Gaara laughed silently to himself. "You just got bitchslapped by Naruto!" Again, no one listened to Gaara's comment.
"Sometimes I swear, it's like you don't even care about me!"
"I was kidding," Sasuke pouted as he rubbed his cheek.
"This isn't a joke Sasuke!!"
"Naruto..."
"What?!"
"Come on, I'm sorry ok?"
"I...I don't get it. Am...am I not good enough? Is it ...don't I give you enough pleasure?"
"Naruto...no, that's not it at all. I...I just thought maybe it'd be fun if...I do care about you Naruto. I love you."
"Do you? Or do you just want me for sex?"
"No. Naruto I...I love you. Please, I can't stand it when you're mad at me like this," he pleaded, almost crying as he hugged Naruto. And I need sex!
Naruto sighed and affectionately rapped his arms around Sasuke. "Oh...Sasuke...why do you do this to me?"
"I'm sorry. Please. Please don't be mad at me," Sasuke continued, still begging for Naruto to forgive him.
"You really anger me sometimes Sasuke, and it hurts cause I care about you."
"I know. I'm sorry. Just...please forgive me?" I might get sex tonight after all, Sasuke thought selfishly.
"I...I don't know..."
Tears then began to roll down Sasuke's cheek. Oh God! I'm not getting sex tonight!
"Sasuke...no, please don't cry."
Gaara then let out a sigh and removed his sand defense. "Ok, look. Your in my office, I just so happen to be a councilor and you two seem to be in desperate need of counseling."
Naruto and Sasuke both looked questioningly at Gaara.
"But if you agree, I have some conditions," Gaara continued.
"Conditions?" Naruto asked.
"All Sexual references, thoughts, experiences, and fantasies will be kept to yourself. There will be no kissing, groping or sexual contact of any kind while in my office."
"We can't even hug?" Asked Sasuke innocently.
"...Ok...you can hug, but that's it. Oh, and there will be absolutely no trying to convince and/or seduce me into being gay."
"Well you don't have to worry about me," Naruto stated plainly.
"Sasuke!"
"Ok, ok, I got it," Sasuke confirmed.
" ...Didn't we just talk about this?" Naruto turned to Sasuke with an angry look in his eye.
"Sorry, I...I like Gaara ok, I do, but your different..."
Naruto continued to glare at Sasuke, arms folded. "Here's a shovel. Keep digging."
"No! That's not what I meant. I like Gaara. I think he's hot but I love you. There's a difference," Sasuke tried to explain.
"But how can I take you seriously when you keep looking at other men?"
"But they mean nothing to me!" Sasuke argued.
"That's not the point Sasuke! You just don't get it do you?! It makes me feel like...like you don't care about me! It makes me feel like I don't matter to you! I do matter to you don't I? I just...you say you love me but you make it hard to believe you when you do things like this!"
"...Ok, I'm sorry. I'll stop, but it's not easy so you'll have to just stick with me ok?"
"But that's just it. It should be easy for you. I should be the only one you're attracted to."
"I'm trying! What the hell do you want from me?!"
Naruto just sat there bitterly without saying a word.
"Oh, come on Naruto. Look, if he didn't care about you he wouldn't be acting so damn desperate." Gaara said, getting irritated with their fighting.
"Hmph." Naruto grunted as he still sat there silently.
"Oh for..." Gaara then got up from his desk, walked over to Naruto and hit him across the head.
"Ow! What the hell?! What was that for?!" Naruto Shouted angrily at Gaara.
Sasuke just sat there laughing at Naruto, who shot him an angry glare. "What are you laughing at?"
"Hey, I've had my fair share of abuse trust me,...and he's about to hit you again." Sasuke stated confidently as if he now understood the reasons Gaara hit him and when.
Naruto then looked at Sasuke with confusion. "What? Why would he-"
Just then Gaara hit Naruto across the head again.
"Ow!"
"Told ya," Sasuke stated sounding even more confident and quite pleased that he wasn't the one getting hit this time. That is, until Gaara hit Sasuke over the head as well.
"Ow! What the hell?!" Sasuke shouted, not expecting Gaara to hit him.
"The both of you are really starting to piss me off! Now kiss and make up already!" Gaara stated angrily, folding his arms as he stared them down.
"But doesn't us kissing violate your conditions?" Sasuke asked.
Gaara, realizing Sasuke had a point, let out a sigh, opened the office door and pushed Naruto and Sasuke outside while he stood in the doorway. "There! You're not in my office anymore. Now kiss and get over it already! No one here is leaving until you two make up!"
Naruto just stood there staring blankly at Sasuke.
Sasuke looked away shyly. "I...I really am sorry."
"I...I guess I was being a little jealous," Naruto sighed.
Sasuke then walked up to Naruto. "Do you forgive me?"
"...Yeah I forgive you..." He said smiling as he embraced Sasuke and kissed him.
"Okay, everyone happy now? Good!" Gaara stated, still a little agitated. Naruto and Sasuke where still kissing.
"...Ok, that's enough! Break it up!" Gaara shouted suddenly as he hit both Sasuke and Naruto across the head.
"Ow! What the hell?!" Naruto and Sasuke both yelled in unison.
"Alright, goodbye. You two have a good night. I'll be in my office trying not to puke." And with that Gaara went back into his office and slammed the door behind him.
"What's up with him?" Naruto asked confused.
"Hell if I know," Sasuke replied.
"So...What do you want to do tonight?" Naruto asked casually.
Sasuke looked at Naruto and smiled slyly.
"I like the way you think." Naruto replied as the two left the building and headed home.
Whoo hoo! Chapter 4! And I think it's pretty clear that Naruto is the woman in this relationship. Which is probably for the better. I know I know...NaruSasu is overdone but I just can't resist, they fit together far to well. Besides, think how crazy it's going to get when Hinata finds out Naruto's cheating on her...with Sasuke, and of course this fanfic isn't complete without Gaara as well as Sasuke's failed attempts to seduce him. Hope you're enjoying it so far and Keep reading!