Chapter Four: When You Were Young

Carlisle's POV

"Thanks for this, Lizzie." I said as we stood outside of the bar after they'd kicked us out. I had managed to stay sober, her not so much. "It helped a lot."

"Anytime Carlisle." She laughed as she tripped over her feet, and I was just able to catch her. "Whoa."

"You going to be okay to get home?" I asked as I set her up straight.

"I took a cab here." She slurred as she stepped close to me. She straightened up and then looked right into my eyes with those beautiful eyes. I wasn't ready for this, and I was sure she wasn't either. But, ready or not she was here and Bella wasn't. We were broken up and I was allowed to have a night where I could do whatever I wanted and then begin nursing my broken heart.

She was at college with hundreds of options, why couldn't Lizzie be mine?

But, regardless, she was drunk and I'd be taking advantage of her and that wasn't right. Especially since I was sober. She leaned in and pressed her lips to mine and I gave into her...until she reached around my front and grabbed my semi-hard member in her hands. I broke the kiss and pushed her back.

"Lizzie, you're drunk."

"Yep."

"I can't." I shook my head. "Not like this. I can't take advantage of you."

"Carlisle I'm drunk, not shit faced." She laughed. "I'm one hundred percent aware of what's going around. Plus you can't take advantage of me if I'm giving it to you."

"Not tonight." I denied. "I'm sorry, but I don't know when Edward's going to be back. If he caught us...bad things would happen."

"Right, you have a son." She sighed, looking disappointed. "Can I at least take a raincheck?" She asked and as I looked her up and down again, I realized how attracked I was to her. There was just something about her that I was drawn to and I wasn't going to turn her away. I didn't want to turn her away. I didn't want to be pining for Bella, especially since there wasn't a one hundred percent chance we'd be getting back together.

"Yeah, and raincheck is good." I smiled as I hailed her a cab. "Call me when you get home, okay?"

"Sure thing." She smiled as she rolled the window up. I found my car and got inside, just sitting there for a while before putting the key in the ignition and pulling out of the lot.

But, as I drove I realized I didn't want to go home yet. I didn't want to go sit in an empty house and pine for Bella again. I missed her, but I didn't want to be the person who shut down after a break up. I'd nearly done that with Esme, and it wasn't healthy for me. I made a U turn and headed in the direction of where Lizzie lived. Once I found the street, I sat in her driveway for a few minutes before going up the walkway.

"Carlisle, what..." She began asking as I crashed my lips into hers. She stood there for a few seconds before giving in and slamming the front door shut. She pushed my coat off my shoulders and I began unbuttoning her PJ top. She moaned into my mouth as our tongues twisted together, and began playing with the hem of my sweater, pulling it up and I broke our kiss and raised my arms so she could get it off of me.

Her eyes bugged out of her head when she saw my built form and then smiled as she leaned in and kissed me again. I pushed her top off of her body and hesitated as I went down and began kissing her neck. But, this night was forgetting about hurting and trying to get past what I left in New York. So, I attacked Lizzie's neck, causing her to moan loudly.

I moved my lips lower and lower until they were kissing the tops of her breasts as I gently massaged them with my hands. She reached behind her and unclasped her bra, sliding it off her shoulders. I smiled when I saw her completely bare before attaching her breasts with my mouth again. As I sucked and tweaked at her nipples, she began undoing my belt and then unsnapping my jeans.

She pushed my pants along with my boxers down to my ankles, and I pushed myself only my knees to throw them on the floor. I pulled down Lizzie's PJ bottoms and went right back to kissing everywhere on her body. She began grinding on me, causing me to harden even more. When we were both in a frenzy, I positioned myself at her enterance, taking a deep breath before entering her.

We both moaned loudly as I pushed myself completely inside, and I stilled letting her adjust to me. She smiled up at me for a few seconds, letting me know she was okay. I began thrusting shallowly in and out until we both needed more. My pace quickened as a thin layer of sweat formed on my forehead. I knew she was getting close by the way she was gripping the bed, so I brought my free hand to her clit, gently working her nerves.

"Fuck!" She yelled as she came. I wasn't far behind her and I was soon stilling inside of her. I felt limp on top of her, unable to catch my breath. I immediately felt guilty for what I'd just done. I'd just used her to try and forget Bella, and it didn't work. I still only wanted to be with Bella.

But, wether I liked it or not, Lizzie was here and Bella wasn't. I had to get used to it.

I pulled out of her and she handed me some tissues to clean up, and then snuggled into my side. I wrapped my arms around her and she yawned and closed her eyes, soon falling asleep. I laid awake for most of the night like usual, and only fell asleep when she had turned her back towards me at four in the morning.

A harsh ringing sound woke me up too soon that morning and once I realized it was my phone, I stumbled out of bet and found my jeans on the floor. I reached in the pocket and retrieved my phone, sliding it open to answer it.

"Hello?" I asked, my voice deep with sleep still. I looked over and saw that Lizzie had been woken up by my phone and was pushed up on her elbows, blinking the sleep out of her eyes.

"Dad?" Edward's voice asked and I quickly looked at the clock. Eleven-thirty. "Where are you?"

"Shit," I whispered, trying to pull my pants up while holding my phone. "I'll be home soon, bud. You have your keys?"

"Yeah, but where are you?" He asked. I didn't want to tell him I was with another girl because I didn't want him to think I was over Bella. That would kill him.

"I fell asleep on a friends couch, Edward." I lied. I hated lying to him. "We were drinking last night." At least that part was true.

"Okay." He sighed, sounding like he didn't believe me. "I'll see you soon?"

"Yeah, I'll bring us lunch." I told him as I hung up. I grabbed my shirt and pulled it over my head as Lizzie pulled on her robe. "I gotta go. Sorry."

"It's okay." she laughed. "I understand."

"I had a really good time last night." I smiled as I grabbed my coat.

"Me too." She smiled, grabbing my jacket and pulling me into a kiss. I didn't want her to think I was using her, but I wasn't ready for whatever she wanted to start. I just decided to go along with it for now and we'd talk about it later. At a better time. If there even was a better time.

"I'll see you tomorrow." I told her as she opened the front door. She nodded as I headed out to my car. I drove quickly to get to my house and found Edward sitting at his piano in the den, playing something new he'd learned. I listened as he finished and clapped when he stopped, making him jump.

I didn't mean to scare you." I laughed as I sat down next to him. "What was that?"

"Nothing." He sighed, grabbing the sheet music and putting it into his folder. But, he wasn't quick enough and I saw Skinny Love written on the top. "Where were you really, dad?"

"I told you..."

"I get my lying skill from you." He told me. "You're a bad liar and I know when your lying."

"I really was with a friend."

"With a friend?" He asked and I knew he understood without me saying anything. I only nodded and he stood up and began pacing. "So you're already over Bella?"

"Edward, no." I sighed.

"Really, dad?" He asked, sounding angry. "You just had sex with another woman because you're still in love with Bella?"

"Hey, Bella and I broken up, Edward." I spat. "For the time being, I am single and can do whatever I want."

"Yeah and I guess you can do whoever you want too then, huh?"

"Hey!" I yelled. "I get your upset but I'm still your dad and you do not have the right to talk to me like that, got it?"

"I can't believe you!" He yelled as he ran upstairs and slammed his door shut.

The next morning, Edward ignored me from the minute he woke up to the minute he got on the bus. I braced myself for the awkward encounter that bound to happen when Lizzie and I saw each other. I wasn't sure what the code of conduct was for this situation. I wasn't sure if she wanted a one night stand or more than friends.

Thankfully, she wasn't in her office or classroom when I got there and I was able to just sneak into mine without having to see her. I'd made it through the entire without running into her. Until she came knocking on my door as I was about to leave.

"Hey," She smiled sadly. "You gotta sec?"

"Sure, come on in." I said, stepping aside to let her inside. I closed the door and had an odd sense of deja-vu, going back to when Bella would visit me in my office. There were so many memories in my office back in New York, and I hated saying goodbye to it. That was the office where everything started with Bella, starting something with Lizzie in this office seemed wrong.

"Can I ask you something?" She asked as she turned around.

"Yeah, go for it."

"Who is she?" She asked, making my breath catch. I hadn't told her about Bella because I didn't want her to think I was some middle aged creep who had an affair with a student.

"What are you talking about?"

"The girl who kept you awake Saturday night." SHe laughed. "The girl who stopped you at first but then you realized you didn't want to be sad about her so you changed your mind and came over."

"Lizzie,"

"It's okay, Carlisle. I get it." She shrugged. "You just needed an outlet. I did too. I'm not ready for anything serious, and I'm not asking for a marriage proposal. My scum of an ex-husband made sure I wouldn't be ready for anything anytime soon."

"Bella," I smiled, trying to hold back tears saying her name. I hadn't said it in so long. "Her name was Bella."

"Pretty."

"She was." I agreed. "And she was a student. That's why I left. She needed to stay at NYU and she wouldn't be able if I stayed. I made a deal with the dean saying we wouldn't speak or see each other until she graduated. That's how she was able to stay there. Because I left."

"Wow and I thought I had a lot of baggae." She laughed. "I can tell it was real, Carlisle. It wasn't just some sleezy affair."

"It was so much more than that." I cried. "She was everything to me." I told her as my phone buzzed in my pocket. I took it out and read the text message Emmett had sent me and excused myself to my classroom to call him like he'd asked.

"Hello." He answered.

"Emmett, what's up?" I asked since his text told me something was up and it wasn't going to be easy for me. "Are you with...are you with Bella?"

"Yeah... I'm with her right now..."

"Why?" I asked. He wasn't one to just be with Bella alone. He wasn't a professor who saw much of students outside the classroom. "Is everything okay?" I asked even though I knew it wasn't. I knew what the kids would be saying about Bella, and I couldn't let her hurt over this.

"You gotta talk to her..."

"Emmett, you know I can't." I argued. But then, the dean would never know if I just said something to her to make her know it would be okay. Even just to hear her voice would get us both through what was happening. "Put her on."

"Okay," He sighed. I heard the phone being passed over to her, and I heard her breathing loudly into the phone.

"Bella,"I whispered, trying to make myself not cry. I couldn't cry. I had to be strong for her. And myself. "You gotta look past it. Be strong."

"Carlisle," She sniffled, sounding like she was in a lot of pain

"Fight back if anyone tries to touch you." I cried as the first tear streamed down my cheek. "You...gotta hold your head up high and don't let them get to you. It's only words."

"Carlisle a professor just tried to..." She said louder, as if trying to get my attention

"I have to go." I cried. I didn't want this to end, but if we got caught it was all for nothing. It couldn't be all for nother. "We can't talk, Bella."

"But, Carlisle..."

"I love you." I nearly sobbed. I was starting to get hysterical just by the sound of her voice. "Bye."

"No, Carlisle!" I heard her yell as I pressed END and slumped into a desk, holding my hands to my face. I loved her so much it hurt and I couldn't be there to protect her. I couldn't be there to defend us and what we had. I hated myself for being away and for what I did with Lizzie the other night. I hated what I'd made my son do and I hated doing what I had to do.

"She's going to be okay." Lizzie whispered as she sat down next to me, handing me a tissue. I took it from her and blotted my face, but my cheeks were red and my eyes were puffy. It was obvious I'd been crying. "You can't give up."

"I'm not giving up."

"Really?" She asked. "Because it looks like your giving up and giving in to this...evil dean that tore you two up."

"What are you saying, Lizzie?"

"I'm saying that this is what the dean wanted." She told me. "He wanted you to feel crumby and hate yourself. Don't give into it."

"The dean won, Lizzie." I sighed. "The dean won the minute he called me into his office."

The next morning, Edward was talking to me more, although he still seemed like he hated me. But I couldn't blame him. I hated me too.

"Dad, your phone's been ringing." He said as he shoved my phone into my face before leaving to get on the bus. I looked at my missed calls and saw I had twenty of them, all from Emmett. I dialed his number as I headed back upstairs to grab my keys and wallet.

"Emmett, what's up?" I asked, trying not to get into what happened yesterday with talking to Bella.

"Bella was trying to tell you something before you hung up on her." He accused, sounding angry at me yet again. "You know that, right?"

"Yes, but it was bad enough talking to her for those thirty seconds, Emmett."

"Yeah, well another thirty more wouldn't have made a difference." He spat.

"Do you know what she was trying to tell me?" I asked as I put my wallet into my pocket and grabbed my coffee mug.

"Professor Michaelson tried to rape Bella last night." He told me and stopped dead in my tracks, dropping my mug on the ground. I couldn't even wrap my head around the words that had just come out of his mouth. Bella. My Bella was almost raped again. That's why she had been so upset and I hadn't even thought about what had really happened when I hung up the phone.

"He...he what?" I asked as tears formed in my eyes. "When?"

"Right before you called." He whispered. "She was just getting out of her stats class and he dragged her back into his classroom and tried getting in her pants."

"How'd she get away?"

"She kicked him in the balls." He laughed. Professor Michaelson was the most hated professor on campus. From falculty to students alike.

"I abandoned her." I cried. "I left and now she's going through this. This is all my fault."

"You did what you thought was best." He sighed. "No one could have predicted this would happen if you left."

"She was raped in high school." I cried, reliving the memory of her telling me what happened that night. "She told me this and I wasn't there to prevent it again."

"Even if you were here you couldn't have stopped him."

"But he thought she liked having sex with professors." I spat. "If I hadn't of started it in the first place, she wouldn't be shaking in fear right now!"

"Carlisle!" He yelled. "This would have happened with or without you!"

"But..."

"Don't you dare blame this on you!" He told me. "Bella's already doing that, I don't need you doing the same."

"I left her, Emmett." I cried. "It's my fault."