They were traveling along the outskirts of Mirkwood, Thorin refused to go through, and rather have them all venture around the lands belonging to the elf king. Gandalf complained, but did not force the dwarf king to travel through the woods he disliked.
Many miles past them by, days were now turning into weeks as their journey continued on. When they found a human village to stock up on supplies, Thorin thought that maybe riding some ponies would get them to their destination faster. So the dwarf king, with out asking anyone's opinion first, bought enough ponies for all of the company.
The only problem he ran into, was finding a friendly mount for Bilbo. The man who sold Thorin the ponies informed Thorin that most of them were green broke, meaning little Bilbo would be having a heck of a time controlling his mount he wound up with. This worried Thorin, but there wasn't much he could do about it. He'd just have to stay close and keep a watchful eye on his hobbit, a tumble off a pony in Bilbo's current state might bring on troubling pain for him.
When he returned and informed his traveling companions that he'd purchased ponies, most dwarfs were fine with it. Gandalf had assumed Thorin had gotten him a horse, and had only used the term pony out of habit. To his dismay, the tall wizard was saddled with a short, stocky pony, his legs almost were dragging the ground when he mounted the tiny animal. The wandering wizard felt very foolish, riding along with these dwarfs, his knees bent funny so that he could look less lanky on the damn creature he rode.
Gandalf wasn't the only one with pony problems, Bilbo kept having issues with his mean little pony. She'd sometimes take her head and turn it to bite at his exposed foot, scaring the holy crap out of him as he dodged wobbly, cursing the mean nag. She also kept behaving stubbornly, sometimes stopping and not willing to go forward, and when she did the little brat crow hopped with him, making him cry and hold on tightly.
Thorin saw how the animal was harassing Bilbo, sensing his unease a top her and testing her inexperienced rider mercilessly. It pissed him off, watching that pony give Bilbo fits for no damn good reason. Finally he had had enough and ordered everyone to halt.
"What's wrong, Uncle?" Kili asked first, everyone watched as Thorin dismounted and marched over towards Bilbo. Currently the mare was tossing her head unnecessarily, trying to keep moving when Bilbo tried making her stand still with the others. Her attitude was impatient as she started to side step, taking control of the hobbit when he should have been the one handling her.
Thorin grabbed her reins, granted he did it a bit roughly, jerking it enough for the pissy mare to pay attention to him.
"Get down, Bilbo." He commanded, his eyes level with the snotty pony, the two were both sizing each other up as the hobbit dismounted, shaking lightly from his body being so uncomfortable riding the ornery mare. She was a fat, white speckled pony, with little pig eyes and a big roman nose.
"Ride my mount for a while, I'm going to teach this mare some manners." He spoke determinedly, waiting until Bilbo was on the calmer steed before mounting the naughty mare.
"Alright, move out. If you notice me going off course, just ignore it. I'm just going to get a bit of piss and vinegar out of her." He informed the others, making the mare wait as her herd mates moved forward with out her. She whinnied and pawed the ground with her eager hooves, trying to toss her head, but Thorin wouldn't allow it. As the group kept going forward, Thorin urged the herd bound mare towards the right. They were traveling through some rocky terrain and what better way to wear her down than to do switch backs along the rocky hills?
At first she tried just going forward, ignoring Thorin until he jerked her head around, making her do circles until she did the correct thing, standing still and willingly giving her head to him. He released his tight rein so that she was rewarded for paying attention and doing as he wanted.
"Alright, we're going right, you head strong pony." He spoke to her, nudging her ribs with his booted heels and was pleased to have her minding him. He followed the ground from the right, doing switch backs and other silly back and forth motions to get her energy spent.
Everything was going fine, until her hooves hit a patch of loose rocks. She started to slide, the rocks slipping under her as Thorin tried getting her to move towards stabler ground. It was too late though, he'd gotten to better ground, but her previous movements had started a rock slide!
He called down to warn them all below, as the rocks started gaining speed, headed towards his still unaware company. Fili looked up and saw the rocks coming, he yelled and kicked his pony into a gallop, the others following suit and doing the same.
Bilbo was the last in line, his pony doing a slow canter for the nervous hobbit, the animal simply wasn't moving fast enough! Thorin watched in horror as the rocks started to rain down on Bilbo and his mount, the horse spooking and jerking sideways, making Bilbo tumble off and roll towards the direction of the group. His pony kept going sideways, the rocks moving him until suddenly, the animal wasn't there anymore!
There happened to be a ravine, a very deep one, the poor animal had fallen down into it, the large amount of rocks sliding off the edge and into the ravine after him, undoubtedly crushing the unfortunate creature to death. As the dust settled, for there was a great deal of it, Thorin carefully made his way towards where he'd last seen Bilbo. His worried eyes searched until he found the curled up hobbit. He had a few cuts and bruises, as far as the dwarf could see. He dismounted quickly and went to Bilbo's side.
"Bilbo, speak to me!" He shook the hobbit gently.
Gandalf and company could be heard riding towards them, as Bilbo uncurled himself and blinked up at Thorin.
"Is your horse alright?" He coughed, looking at Thorin questioningly.
"He went over that ravine." Thorin spoke, looking over Bilbo's body carefully. "Are you in pain?" He asked of the hobbit.
"Damn. I'm sorry Thorin. If I had stayed on that mare, you'd still have your pony." He sighed in dismay, making Thorin shake his head in bewilderment.
"I'm glad it was the animal and not you, Bilbo. If you'd stayed on this horse, that easily could have been you over the edge." He spoke his honest opinion, Bilbo looked at the pony behind Thorin.
"Is she behaving any better now?" He asked, Thorin stood and helped up his lightly cut and bruised friend.
"Well, she's no Minty, but she'll do. Come on, you're riding with me from now on." The king informed his companion, sweeping him up and placing him on the pony. Thorin mounted after, careful not to whack Bilbo in the head as his leg swung over the saddle.
"Everything alright?" Dwalin called, the group now only a few yards away.
"Fine, lets get going." Thorin motioned the mare into a trot, chuckling as the hobbit squeezed him like a pillow.
"As long as you have me at the reins, there's no need to worry, little one. "He told Bilbo, taking his rein free and and squeezing one of the hobbits that was around his waist.
-0-0-
By the Eldar, that had been a frightful scene! Watching that poor creature plummet down and get smothered in tumbling rocks. Tauriel was glad she had stayed back this much! Silently she watched as the dust settled, her vision clearer as she watched the dwarf leader hurry his pony to a curled up Bilbo. The hobbit had been lucky, if he had not tumbled off when he had...
The group was coming over to the kingly dwarf, hailing him as they neared. Thorin helped the little one on then mounted after, leading the group onward. She waited a while before following, about to move when a sound caught her attention. Rocks, lightly sliding together was what she heard, the elf turned and looked, seeing nothing but sensing a form watching her.
She drew her blades, backing towards the direction Kili had gone with his friends, searching around for anything out of the ordinary as she backed away. Nothing popped out, so reluctantly she turned and started jogging towards the direction of her boyfriend. Ears alert for anything coming behind her as she moved quickly, and quietly.
-0-0-
That had been very close, Legolas was not usually that sloppy. He actually made a noise, and had almost been noticed by Tauriel. He felt annoyed with himself as he followed silently, and at a greater distance. Her guard was up, and he still wanted her to not know of his presence just yet.
He couldn't believe they had traveled this long, what kept him from confronting her and making Tauriel come home with him? Well, he knew she was doing this for her own reasons, and didn't want to stop her. Not until things got really out of hand. When things started to get funny, or weird, he'd do the right thing and confront her.
Oh, if his father could see him now, journeying way beyond their boundaries, following dwarfs. The king would have had a gigantic lecture ready for him, boring his son while also only making him want to explore even more. It's not that he didn't try to please his father, because Legolas did. But some days were harder than others, the Mirkwood king was hard to always satisfy. Especially when you didn't fully agree with what he ordered you to do, those were the really hard days. But at least for now, Legolas was free to follow Tauriel, without getting a stern talking to from his strong willed parent.
Night was settling in, he could see the fire of the dwarfs camp from where he stood. Quietly he surveyed Tauriel in a tree, hidden from everyone but him. For a long while he stood there, observing and finding the stillness a bit tiresome, that was when she hopped down. He moved a bit closer and followed her movements with his keen eyes.
She was dangerously close to the dwarf camp, worrying him. He was about to unsheathe his swords when her actions stopped him.
She was taking tiny rocks and chucking them at something inside the camp! This confused Legolas a great deal as he continued to watch the oddity. Finally she halted, standing very still one moment, then hustling off, back towards her original tree spot.
That dwarf! He was following her! Legolas had his bow ready as he moved in closer, ready to save Tauriel if the dwarf tried attacking, when the most outrageous thing happened. She embraced the dwarf and began placing her lips upon him passionately! He leaned against a near by tree, Legolas was so shocked by the display. His bow was limply hanging in his drooping hand as he kept seeing more unthinkable things going on between dwarf and elf.
Urgent hands were groping, tongues were licking, it was becoming hard to breath now, as he watched, feeling his stomach rolling in nausea at the unwelcome tragedy occurring before his very eyes. An elf with a dwarf? Kissing? Hugging? Possibly fuc...No, he couldn't imagine that scenario! He just couldn't!
Uneasily, the confused and sick feeling Legolas slid to the ground, leaning his back against the tree behind him and throwing his head back. The elf closed his eyes and concentrated on breathing evenly. He was feeling light headed, and needed to pull through this emotional breakdown he was having.
-0-0-
After kissing and holding each other passionately, the she-elf was the first to pull back and ask the reason why Kili was journeying with his group.
"Bilbo's really sick, and Gandalf thinks this Lady Gald-something is going to be able to help him." Kili spoke with a shrug, trying to kiss her once more, but received only her cheek instead of her lips.
"Do you mean Lady Galadriel? The Lady of Light? Your friend must be very ill to need her help." Tauriel commented, the horny youth nodding simply and trying to playfully slip off her clothing.
"What's the matter with him?" She asked, moving away his hands to halt his persistent tugging and pulling.
"He's got something strange inside him, growing. Gandalf can't remove it so he thinks that Lady can." Kili answered her, his lips quickly going to hers before she could stop him.
Tauriel let him kiss her a moment longer, before pulling back again.
"I was sent to watch the mountain, the king has heard there's been an elf sneaking about the dwarf home. I'm suppose to be there right now, but instead I followed you. I have a distinct feeling my master knows that it is I who sneak within the mountain. I might not be able to return to Mirkwood after this disobedience, Kili." She searched his face for what she hoped to see.
"Live with me then, even if my uncle forbids it, we'll just live together somewhere else then." He answered her, taking his right hand and twirling his fingers through her long, soft hair.
"You'd truly do so for me?" She smiled sweetly at him, feeling pleased that he felt so strongly towards her.
"Yes." He stated simply, cupping her cheek and kissing her lovingly.
A strange, animalistic sound startled them, pausing their kiss as they looked around uncertainly. Whatever it was, it sounded terrible! Tauriel urged him to go back to camp so that she could search for the unknown creature.
Reluctantly, he went, but not before holding her tightly and kissing the maiden one final time. With flushed cheeks she watched him go back, her eyes leaving his form to begin her search for that weird sounding creature...
-0-0-
He had opened his eyes and seen them passionately doing things again, the elf couldn't help it! With so much mixed emotions inside him and feeling grossed out at watching her face pressed against all that hair...Legolas vomited. He vomited hard, and he vomited a large amount, making a god awful noise while doing it too. He couldn't help it at this point, all he could do was barf, stopping here and there to pant and spit.
After a few moments the vomiting subsided, the elf trembling from the exhaustion he felt from relinquishing so much of his stomach contents. Small, shallow breaths were made as he tried to calm down his body, knowing he was vulnerable in this unfortunate situation.
His ears picked up the light sounds of elfin footsteps, the shaky Legolas got to his feet and hid within the foliage, trying to breath quietly as he watched Tauriel walk past, never noticing him.
'That's it, in the morning I'm going to confront her! This is not befitting of her, she needs to stop all this before its too late!' Legolas thought to himself, having had enough of this "simply watch" bullshit.
-0-0-
The Hobbit belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien.