For the fifth time in the past ten minutes, Hermione had run her fingers through her hair and sighed.

"Alright!" Ginny dropped her pen rather forcibly onto the table top and looked directly at Hermione. "What is it?" She asked, both Neville and Luna looked up from the essay that they were supposed to be writing.

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked, flustered at being asked so directly.

"Well for the past half an hour all you've done is stare into space and sigh forlornly." Ginny stated in a rather matter of fact voice. "So whatever you're thinking about, why don't you offload it so you can get it out of your head, and I can get this essay completed?"

"Sorry…" Hermione apologized, she had already finished the essay that the three of them were currently working on, and she hadn't realised just how distracting her actions had been. She had been sitting with one of her other textbooks open, but she hadn't been able to focus on the writing – she had been thinking about Thursday evening and what had happened with Draco, their kiss. She had been unable to think of much else since she had left the Room of Requirement… Draco had left straight after, he hadn't even said another word – he had almost fled from the room… and Hermione didn't know where that left them now.

"Well?" Ginny recalled Hermione to the present, she was staring at Hermione expectantly. "What is it?"

"I…" She started, but then she remembered how Ginny had reacted when she was just talking to Draco; how would she react if she explained that she had kissed him? "I can't tell you…" She finished lamely.

"So it's about Malfoy." Ginny concluded, rather superciliously – however correctly.

"Why would you assume that?" Hermione asked, she didn't want to let Ginny know that she was right straight away.

"Well who else would you not want to talk about? It's obviously about Malfoy."

"It's a bit quick to make assumptions like that, isn't it?" Hermione pointed out.

"So it's not about Malfoy?" Ginny asked, Hermione bit her lip.

"I didn't say that…"

"So my assumption was right." Ginny flicked her hair over her shoulder and folded her arms across her chest.

"Well, yeah…" Hermione admitted.

"Okay then, well I'll go back to writing my essay and you can moan at Neville and Luna seeing as clearly I'll disapprove." She commented sarcastically, picking up her quill and beginning to write furiously.

"Sorry." Hermione repeated, feeling annoyed that Ginny had reacted like that when that was what Hermione had been trying to avoid. "It doesn't even matter." But Neville had leant forward in his chair so he was closer to Hermione.

"It clearly does matter to you, or you wouldn't be worrying about it…" Neville refuted, "Look I'm nearly finished this essay anyway – you could just distract me for a little while." He suggested with a small smile on his face. "I would be more than happy to be distracted, my brain's turned to mush with all this transfiguration work."

"Are you sure?" She really did want to speak about it with someone, but didn't want to take them away from what they should be doing.

"Yeah, go for it." He nodded; Luna was also nodding at Hermione but in the slightly dreamy manner that characterised her actions.

"Please don't pass this on to anyone else." She said suddenly, remembering what the Hogwarts gossip vine was like.

"Come on, who do you think we are?" Neville commented, "We're not going to tell anyone, I promise."

"Well okay…" Hermione seemed to consider for a few seconds before deciding that they were trustworthy enough for her to tell them. "You know how on Thursday evening I got back to the common room really late?"

"Yeah," Neville nodded. "And you told us about what happened to Draco."

"But I didn't tell you it all…" She said quietly. "I told you about finding him being beaten up by those boys." She paused as the memory still ignited anger in her, "And I told you about taking him to Professor McGonagall, and then taking him to get cleaned up."

"Yeah…" Neville waited for the bit that Hermione was trying to get to.

"Well he refused to go to the hospital wing to get cleaned up and so I took him to the Room of Requirement." She explained. "Because he really was in a state and I didn't want him to go back to his dormitory without being checked over." She bit her lip nervously, trying to think of the correct words to say to explain. "When I had fixed his nose and cleaned the blood up from his face – and tried to get him to tell me about what had happened, and why he wasn't annoyed about it…"

"And..?" Neville prompted, for Hermione had fallen into a reverie again; Hermione blinked rather startled and blurted out:

"We kissed." This time the silence was between all three of them, for a second Neville just goggled at her, and even Ginny looked up from her writing.

"You…" He began slowly.

"Kissed, yeah…" Hermione nodded, biting her lip. "And I don't know how it happened, it just did…" She explained lamely. Neville seemed to be wracking his brain to find the right thing to say, but before he managed Ginny had snorted and muttered audibly:

"Bit of a step down is it not?"

"What do you mean by that?" Hermione asked, feeling her temper rise suddenly; this had been the reason she really hadn't wanted to talk about this with Ginny, because she couldn't stand all the snarky comments that Ginny made.

"Well from a proper relationship with Ron to shacking up with Malfoy…" She remarked, not even raising her gaze from her essay. "More like a jump from a cliff…"

"You know as well as I do that Ron and I weren't going to work…" Hermione replied sharply.

"So what, you just go for the next person to fling themselves at you?" Ginny sparked.

"He didn't fling himself at me!" Hermione refuted.

"That's harsh Ginny…" Neville chipped in, finally having found his voice. He turned to look at Hermione, away from Ginny. "So you kissed… What happened then?"

"Well we both just kinda left…" Hermione admitted embarrassed, "I think it took us both by surprise…"

"So you didn't say anything, or he didn't…?" He asked, Hermione shook her head. "So what is it that's making you worry about it?"

"I don't know…" She sighed, "I don't know what I do now though… I was getting somewhere, we were building something… now it's all a bit awkward."

"Well what do you want to happen?" Neville asked gently.

"What do you mean 'what does she want to happen'?" Ginny broke in once more; she had looked up from her essay again, looking utterly scandalized. "You aren't honestly condoning this… this, whatever it is she has with Malfoy?"

"I don't have a real reason to hold a grudge against Draco…" Neville replied plainly. "So I don't see why Hermione being his friend matters. It's no different from Hermione being friends with us."

"Apart from we didn't work for Lord Voldemort," Ginny snorted, "And not everyone hates us…"

"I don't hate him…" Luna chimed in, they all looked at her. "I don't know him very well, but I don't hate him."

"Yeah, I'm the same as Luna." Neville nodded in agreement. "I don't know Draco… but by the sounds of it, he's changed a lot since the War – but then we all have, haven't we?"

"Then you're all mad!" Ginny commented, "Poisonous toadstools don't change their spots…."

"Maybe not… but people do." Neville answered quickly. "You should know that."

"And Draco recognised that he had been in the wrong before the War was over." Hermione muttered.

"What?" Ginny asked scathingly.

"Ask your boyfriend." Hermione said louder. "If it wasn't for Draco, Harry wouldn't be alive…"

"If it wasn't for his mother maybe, but - " Ginny responded disbelievingly, "But not him-"

"No, I'm talking about a different occasion." Hermione insisted. "You ask Harry about Malfoy Manor, and I guarantee that he will tell you the same – that Draco saved his life." Ginny pursed her lips and pointedly looked away from Hermione. "Ginny you don't have to like Draco, I don't care if you hate him, but can you please stop bashing him in front of me?" She pleaded. "It's like if I was to sit here and bash Harry, or Ron… you wouldn't like it, and you wouldn't put up with it… all I'm asking for is the same courtesy for me and my friends." Ginny said nothing, but Hermione took that as her not arguing.

"Right…" Neville broke the silence after Hermione's statement. "Hermione, what do you want to happen?"

"I… I really don't know." Hermione bemoaned, "That's my problem…"

"Do you like him?" Neville asked, and Hermione felt suddenly as though she had been catapulted back to first and second year – it was more complex than that now, things couldn't be based on whether, or not, she had a crush on someone. But in that sudden reminder of those kind of first year feelings, she realised that she must have a crush on Draco, otherwise why would the thought of that be bothering her?

"I…" She started, rather disconcerted that she hadn't picked up on her real feelings sooner. "I hadn't thought about him like that before…" She replied.

""Before…?" Neville picked up on her uncertainty.

"Well… I hadn't thought about it until now." She replied, still evasively.

"So you do like them." It was less of a question and more a statement.

"Perhaps." She muttered.

"Well why don't you speak to him about it?" He suggested, "And see how he feels about it."

"Maybe." Hermione agreed, now considering how she would go about having that conversation with Draco.

"I'll think about it…"

But even with Neville's prompting that she should speak to Draco, Hermione didn't really consider this option as viable. After Thursday night she knew that Draco had much more pressing issues on his mind than kissing her… but she couldn't have been more wrong.

'What do I do – oh my god, I've totally screwed everything up this time.' Draco had rubbed his hands almost raw with the amount of times that he had gone over and over, rubbing his hands together, interlocking and unlocking his fingers – worrying. The thought kept repeatedly circling – how he had screwed everything up right at the moment that he might have gotten some clarity and resolve. 'Urgh, I'm such an idiot…' He constantly scolded himself for that one tiny action. 'What the hell do I do now?' Everything was so mixed up and confused… How was he supposed to talk to her now when he had done that? He hadn't even realised what he was doing until they were actually kissing… And then it had been too late, it was done. And it wasn't like he could go back and change it, it had happened, and then he'd panicked. He hadn't known what to say or do next, and the next thing he remembered was almost running from the room. It wasn't until he had been three floors down, out of breath and suddenly aware of the sharp searing pain in his ribcage, that he realised that he had just run away from sorting the whole situation out. Maybe Hermione would have just understood that he was grateful, and a little bit confused about them; she probably wouldn't have reacted that badly… She had been the only person who had spoken to him, and taken enough time to get to know him a bit. He had gotten to know her as well… But maybe that was why they had, well, kissed… He felt embarrassed; could that possibly be the only reason? Because she was the only person being nice to him? No – he refuted to himself, he surely wasn't that shallow… he hadn't known Hermione before this year, but as he had found more out about her, the more he had realised that she had always been a decent human being, and he had been in the wrong.

'What the heck do I do now?' Draco ran his hands through his hair, ruffling up his usually perfect hairstyle. 'How am I ever supposed to speak to her again after that kiss?'

"You're not going to be able to avoid him forever Hermione…" Neville pointed out at breakfast on Monday morning.

"What?" Hermione asked, sounding somewhat unsure of what Neville was talking about.

"Draco… You can't hide from him forever." Neville stated obviously.

"I know…" She muttered, but that didn't stop her inadvertently making herself smaller – she was holding her head lower than usual, her shoulders hunched, maybe she didn't realise it, but it looked outwardly like she was hiding.

"Are you going to talk to him?" Neville asked.

"I don't know… Only if I get the chance to speak to him alone." She said, "I don't really want to embarrass him in front of other people…"

"That makes sense," Neville nodded. "But you will speak to him?" He prompted encouragingly.

"Yeah," She muttered non commitally.

Luckily on Mondays the only subjects that Hermione shared with Draco were transfigurations and potions, and both of them she soon realised that Draco was absent from. That however, didn't put Hermione's mind at ease, the last time he had been absent from classes he had been drinking rather a lot… it wasn't promising if it was happening again, Hermione didn't want to be the reason for him missing out and going silent all over again. And still, round and round and round the thoughts went in her head; questions about what she should do next. She had to continually ask herself how she really felt, so as to determine whether she had the sort of feelings that would warrant talking to him, about perhaps being more than just friends… That was assuming that Draco had the same kind of feelings: he might not, he maybe was just acting to a spur of the moment instinct…

What she needed, or really wanted at least, was to talk to someone outside of the situation, not Ginny or Neville or Luna… Someone who wouldn't be biased, who would give her advice on what she should really do. And it came to her, halfway through her transfiguration class – she could write to Harry.

At dinner time she sat slightly apart from Neville, Luna and Ginny – scanning the Great Hall as she did for any sight of Draco – and drafted a letter to Harry.

'Harry,

Sorry I haven't written to you in a while, being back at Hogwarts is much busier than I expected. How is everything going on the trip? Where abouts are you now? What have the two of you been up to?

I'm not going to pretend, I'm writing to you for some advice. There's something I don't know what to do about, and I thought you might give me some honest advice on the matter. You might have already heard from Ginny, but I've been spending quite a bit of time with Draco Malfoy… He is Head Boy and so I've been working with him on a couple of things for school, but I've also been spending a bit of time with him outside of that… I know Ginny doesn't approve, but I mean, he really isn't any different from you or I, is he? I think he's been having a hard time from the rest of the students, but he's also kind of haunted by the War… and not in the same way that we are, it's really affecting him badly. When I look back I always know that what we were doing was the right thing and that's reassuring, but ti's obviously not the same for Draco. It's not really fair because no one really knows how he helped us when we were at Malfoy Manor. Anyway, I've been spending a bit of time just getting to know him and being friendly because no one else is going to! He's not actually a bad guy Harry – he's not the cockroach we used to think, and especially because I've been getting to know him away from everyone else, but most of that is beside the point- I wanted to ask some advice on something that happened last week. To cut a long story short, I was with Draco on Thursday night, and we accidentally kissed, well I mean more unexpectedly than accidentally = but now I'm not really sure what to do now… I can't speak for Draco, I don't know what he's thinking or how he's feeling; however it would be foolish of me to deny that I've got feelings for him. I just don't know whether to talk to him about what happened or to pretend like it hasn't happened at all… I know you're probably going to find this hilarious – me not sure about what to do, but just remember I gave you advice when it was you and Cho, and you and Ginny! I'm worried that if I say anything to Draco that he might stop talking to me – and more than anything that would leave him completely on his own without anyone to talk to, and I don't want that to happen.

Be honest with me Harry, what do I do? Do I pretend as though nothing has happened – or do I actually talk to him about it?

I'm sorry to bother you about all of this, I didn't know who else I could talk to that would give me an unbiased opinion. I'm sorry to just dump all of this on you.

I hope your trip is going well and that you're enjoying yourself… I hope to hear back from you soon.

Hermione.'

She surveyed over the roll of parchment, barely aware of the rest of the students surrounding her, or her untouched plate of macaroni cheese all she wanted to do was send this letter and get back to the common room and finish her homework so she could get this day over and done with. She left the Great Hall quickly, with the scroll of parchment clutched firmly in her hand.

Up in the owlery Hermione picked the first owl that she could reach, and tied the letter to it's leg; with it perched on her arm she carried it across to the open window and let it take off from her arm. She watched it until it was out of sight, hoping that she would soon receive a reply…

A/N: Thanks for sticking with me, and I'm sorry that you've had to wait for so long!

Thank you for reading this far, I'd love to know what you think/feel about it so far! :)