Draco's last two classes of the term were almost unbearable; both of them were classes without Hermione, and during this time of temporary separation the magnitude of the day made him reflect on this being his last year, and the previous few months that he had spent at Hogwarts. When he closed his eyes, it almost felt like he had been transported out of what should be his life and into a life that he did not deserve. He could never have imagined, or believed, that in just four months it seemed like everything in his life had changed for the better, it had seemed impossible in September. In September he had been resigned to the fact that he was never going to feel better, he was never going to be able to move on; he had been consumed with hatred for his past self and loathing of himself during the present, and the only reason he had decided to come back to school was because he couldn't stand being alone in the Manor. And how many times during that first month had he thought that he should just leave - that he couldn't cope with the other students looking at him, talking about him, and just the constant presence of other people. Despite hating the Manor, at least you could be ensured privacy whenever you wanted it, Hogwarts wasn't really like that, and he had persistently felt like he was in a bright spotlight. He'd taken to the forest, hiding in the clearing just a few minutes' walk into the trees; when he had been at Hogwarts before he had never liked the forest, but this year it had been the solace that he had so desperately needed. It had been on one of those trips into the forest in pursuit of solitude that had led to speaking to Hermione properly for the first time. He could only vaguely remember it, he remembered the rain and the cold, but that was about it. Then he had woken up in the Room of Requirement, and Hermione had been there... And the rest was history.
Thinking back on it (and conveniently ignoring the teaching of the class that he was meant to be listening to), he could not have believed just how far he had come in such a short time; and it wasn't like it had been entirely easy. He had struggled with trying to overcome the ignorance and the prejudice of everyone around him, but worst of all had been the thoughts inside his own head. He knew that there would be times that he would be reminded of the war and of everything that he had done; he knew there would be days that he would feel the guilt and the burdening weight - he couldn't promise that he would never feel like that again because he couldn't guarantee that... But he could guarantee that he would work at it, and when those feelings and emotions did arise, he wouldn't let them consume him. Before he could not have seen a way out, now he could not imagine going back down that route, he wasn't going to let himself - and Hermione had been the catalyst for making that recovery decision. He didn't deserve her, and he knew he didn't any of her help - but he had decided that he was going to be thankful for her. He was going to always be thankful for Hermione, and he would remember to always show her that thanks.
Even though he was Head Boy, he regretted that so far he hadn't actually helped at all with the planning of the three events that the prefect team had decided they would execute, he had been too self-conscious about going to the meetings at all. Now he wanted to make up for that, he had promised Hermione that he would help her with the overall planning of the school concert and play that they were going to be putting on in the term following Christmas, but he also agreed that he would help the ball committee with the decorating of the Great Hall.
He ate lunch with Hermione - he found that he was now enjoying going to lunch, and he was actually eating now that he was meeting her every day. Once lunch had finished, he watched as the students vacated the hall, some in large groups and others in twos and threes, until the Great Hall was completely empty. To his great surprise, Luna floated over from where she had been sitting to stand next to Draco; she was so silent in this action that Draco jumped when he turned round and she was standing there watching Hermione talking the prefects through what they had to do to prepare the hall.
"Luna!" He exclaimed through his fright. "What are you doing? Shouldn't you be going to class?"
"Oh no." She smiled, "I'm the decoration planner."
"You are?" Draco tried his best not to let his voice sound incredulous.
"Oh yes," She hadn't seemed to notice the questioning tone in his voice. "Do you remember my quidditch hats?"
"Uh... no." Draco responded slowly.
"Of course, we weren't friends then." She stated, "I made hats with the houses' emblems, and they were all animated to do different things."
"Oh cool!" He said.
"Yes, Hermione thought it might be good to have something like them at the ball, so she asked me to figure something out using them." Luna explained, just at that point Hermione had turned round and beckoned Luna to join the rest of the prefects, giving Draco a big smile at the same time. It was nice to watch Hermione doing things like this; she was so organised, so dedicated and passionate - it always made Draco's heart do a peculiar jolt, like a shot of electricity and warmth were spreading all through his body. It reminded him just how lucky he was, and how he truly felt about Hermione - how much he loved her.
He did love her. That thought had kept presenting itself in his head more and more frequently, especially recently. He had never acted on that thought; he had kept it close to himself like a beacon lighting up the darkest recess of his heart. He hadn't wanted to voice it out and scare her, he didn't want to go too quick - he didn't want to ruin everything.
The ball was due to start at half past six, the logic behind this being that it was still early enough for eating, but would also have given the students ample time to get ready after their classes for the day. Once the hall had been prepared, the ball committee had congratulated themselves for pulling off the feat of preparing such an extensive task so well, and they all parted to begin getting ready. Hermione had spent several more minutes in the entrance hall with Draco; he thought she still seemed rather stressed about the night's event, but she relaxed when she hugged him.
"Right, I better go and get ready." She said rather reluctantly, squeezing Draco's hand. "I'll meet you in the entrance hall, alright?" He nodded. "I'll see you later." She said, letting go of his hand and turning to walk up the stairs; Draco stood watching her until she reached the top of the staircase before he made his way down to the Slytherin common room.
Draco was the first to get back to his dorm, as they were slightly earlier than the classes finishing. He dug around in his trunk, looking for his dress robes so that he could steam them out when he went in the shower. Once Draco had decided that he was going to the ball with Hermione, he realised that he hadn't had dress robes that he could wear; on that decision, he had made a trip to Twilfit and Tattings in Hogsmeade. Perhaps for good reason he hadn't been able to associate his old green velvet robes with himself now, he felt that they belonged to the past Draco, and reinforced the Slytherin ideals. He didn't want that to blur or tar any of him, so when he visited the shop the first - and main - request he made was that he didn't have green robes.
"Green?" The woman had said, "Oh no, green would drain your skin tone love!" She had pulled out reams of colour, holding them up to his face. She had finally settled on, and Draco had bought, a set of light grey robes, he supposed some people might have called them silver, but they weren't quite sparkly enough to really be silver. He had been glad that the woman in the shop had automatically given him long sleeved robes; he wasn't sure how he would have explained his left forearm, and he certainly wouldn't have wanted to expose that at the ball.
Draco could hear the other boys arriving back from their classes as he was in the shower; he heard their excited chatter as they pulled out robes and began to get ready. Draco took his time in the shower, he didn't particularly want to listen to the rest of the boys; he could already feel a pang of nervousness somewhere in the region of his stomach. He couldn't quite explain why he was beginning to feel so nervous, perhaps it was because this was the first time that he was officially doing something with Hermione; perhaps it was because he knew that he was going to be stared at for being with her. He was ready much earlier than he needed to be, and he didn't want to just stand around waiting - he knew that the other boys from the dorm would want the use of the bathrooms to get ready, and he didn't want to cause any more animosity. He perched upon the edge of his bed for a while, just waiting and watching the others pulling their dress robes on and listening to them chatting about what they were hoping would happen that evening. Draco wondered whether Hermione was doing the same thing, whether she was helping the other girls in her dorm get ready and vice versa... Maybe Ginny would be helping her, surely she wouldn't hold that much of a grudge that she wouldn't help Hermione get ready? He was meant to be meeting her in the entrance hall, but he couldn't wait for that long, so instead he left his dormitory early. As he walked through the area which contained all the boys' dormitories for Slytherin he could hear from inside each dormitory the excited chattering as all the occupants were getting ready. It was really nice to hear that sound, and Draco took his time walking through just listening. There wasn't anyone in the common room; they all must be in their dormitories getting themselves prepared. Draco paced around for a minute or so, before making the decision that instead of meeting Hermione in the entrance hall he would go up and meet her outside Gryffindor common room.
He had plenty time to make his way up there; in the entrance hall he could hear from inside the Great Hall the musicians who would be providing the music for the dancing after they had eaten. The rest of the castle was so quiet, it was peculiar because normally at nearly six in the evening people would be milling about and making their way down to the Great Hall for dinner, but tonight there was almost silence. He was reminded how creepy the castle sometimes felt when there was no one else around. He knew roughly where the Gryffindor common room was, he had twice walked Hermione up to the end of the corridor where she would get in, and he arrived on the seventh floor still too early. His heart was pounding now, and he felt shivery even though he wasn't cold; he was a bit more nervous now, but he was more nervous about how Hermione might be feeling about the ball. She had worked so hard on this and Draco really wanted it all to go well for her.
At ten past six, people began emerging from the portrait hall of the Gryffindor common room; they were probably meeting with partners from other houses, heading down to meet them maybe like Draco and Hermione had planned. Draco was feeling more nervous as people passed on their way, a few of them sending glances his way, perhaps he should have just waited in the entrance hall after all! But he was here now, and the pounding of his heart in his chest was filling up his whole body and eclipsing the sound from the corridor all around him; so he couldn't even hear if they were muttering about him or ignoring him completely - they probably were ignoring him, too focused on what they were going down to. More and more students were now coming out of the portrait hole and heading down towards the Great Hall, and a pang of worry struck through Draco - what if Hermione wasn't going to appear? No, he knew she wouldn't do that to him, not after it had taken them so long to eventually get to a point where they were coming together! He watched as groups of girls appeared in the seventh floor corridor, all of them looking excited and very pretty - the variety of different outfits were spectacular to behold. Some girls were in short, knee-length cocktail dresses, others in long ball gowns, and others were in a combination of evening dresses and dress robes. With this sort of clothing on, and their hair and make up all done, they looked most unlike teenagers and more adult than ever - even the younger years looked older. The men, too, looked business-like, well groomed and youthful. For some reason a lump was in Draco's throat, many of these students hadn't experienced much of what had happened last year; many of them had been protected, but for the few that had been involved, this gave them the chance to try and rebuild some happy memories within the castle walls. That was certainly true for himself, and Hermione - and probably for Neville, Luna and Ginny too. It meant a lot to them all.
Draco was checking his watch, beginning to get worried about the time, when he heard the Gryffindor portrait hole open, and out clambered (as elegantly as it is possible to clambered through a hole) Hermione. She was simply stunning, and for a few seconds Draco thought his heart had stopped working, his chest suddenly flooded with a warmth, and goose bumps erupting all up his arms and the hair stood up on the back of his neck. Hermione hadn't realised that Draco was standing there watching until she looked up, she looked slightly shocked at first but her face relaxed into a smile. Ginny followed Hermione out of the portrait hole, and Draco walked forwards to meet the both of them. She was in a full length evening gown, corseted at the top and flowing silken material from the waist down in a shade of royal blue which seemed to accentuate the colour of her eyes. Her hair was drawn back into an elegant sort of chignon, a few loose curls framing her slender face; all of this highlighted her positively regal bone structure.
"You look beautiful..." He whispered quietly, standing in front of Hermione and looking down intently into her face; she just smiled, her eyes glittering. Draco held out his arm for Hermione to take hold of, and they began to walk down the stairs that would take them the seven floors down to the entrance hall. Out of politeness, and the intention to make Hermione's night the best it possibly could be, he addressed Ginny: "You look wonderful Ginny." Ginny was wearing a light silver evening gown that trailed along the floor behind her; she didn't look altogether sure, but replied:
"You don't look too bad yourself." She seemed to be speaking rather grudgingly, but Hermione beamed at the both of them.
The noise of chattering students was getting louder and louder the closer that they got down to the entrance hall, clearly there was quite a few people waiting for the doors to the Great Hall to open and allow them entry - for the Christmas ball to begin. Hermione's hand found Draco's, and she squeezed it tightly, she knew how much this was taking for him to stand next to her and look so calm and collected despite the high profileness of tonight. He did look incredibly handsome though; Hermione could feel a squirming, fluttering sensation in her stomach when she looked at him. At the floor just above the marble staircase, Hermione paused; Draco was pulled back unexpectedly as he was still holding her hand, Ginny also hesitated at them stopping.
"Can we have a minute? We'll be down in a few seconds Ginny." Hermione reassured Ginny; she nodded and continued down the marble staircase, not even looking back at them.
"Is everything okay?" Draco asked, and Hermione nodded.
"Are you sure you're okay with this?" She questioned, "Because if you don't feel comfortable, it is alright... I won't feel annoyed or upset."
"I promise you, I am absolutely okay with this. I want you - us to have a really good night!" Draco responded, and before Hermione could say anything else to him, he kissed her. This simple action seemed to give both of them some steel, and ramp up the excitement within them. "Come on," Draco held out his arm for Hermione to hold while they proceeded down the marble staircase. "I want to show everyone how fantastically stunning my girlfriend is!" And she was stunning; Draco couldn't quite understand how he could be so lucky...
At twenty-five past six, Hermione, Draco and Ginny had been joined by Luna and Neville - both of whom were looking very happy (if slightly nervous) at being with one another. The entrance hall was packed now, they were waiting for the doors to open, the teachers inside must have been trying to draw out the excitement, but it must have become too much even for them as the entrance hall suddenly became silent as creaking had been heard from behind the doors - which were the only things separating them from the delights within. When the doors finally pulled open, there was an awed silence... The twelve normal Christmas trees were coated in silver and white frost, and the platform that normally hosted the teachers table was covered in sparkling silver glass tables and chairs, that seemed as though they had been carved out of ice. Above the platform hovered four creatures, not quite solid, nor made of vapour, the four house emblems - the Gryffindor lion with a red scarf attached around the lower part of its mane; the Hufflepuff badger with a yellow cloak around its shoulders streaming down to its feet; the Ravenclaw eagle with a blue headdress which perched on top of its head and a stream of see through material flowed out from the back of the headdress like some sort of veil; and the Slytherin snake encrusted with silver jewellery. Draco stood, almost dumbstruck by the magnificence of it, as the hundreds of students began to flood their way in and occupy the seats around the tables. Several tables at the very end of the hall, nearest the teachers' platform, were reserved, and Hermione led their group up to one of them. The two other reserved tables were for the prefects that had been on the ball committee; as soon as everyone had a seat in the hall, Professor McGonagall stood up at the front and silence fell:
"Good evening and welcome to the Hogwarts Christmas Ball!" She was interrupted at the end of this sentence by several people who had begun to clap, but she held her hand up for quiet again. "I'm sure you are all looking forwards to a lovely meal and then some time to relax, mingle and let your hair down at the end of a term of hard work!" There were a few titters when she suggested letting their hair down. "However before we can do so, I think we should thank the prefect team and head boy and girl for working so hard to make tonight possible." Hermione had flushed bright red in embarrassment as the whole hall erupted into applause, and Draco made it very obvious that he was clapping the most enthusiastically. When the applause had died down, Professor McGonagall announced: "Without further ado, let the feast begin!" A buzz of excited conversation filled the hall again, and food began appearing in the centre of the tables; this had been part of Hermione's idea, each table would get a variety of different foods and could pick and choose what they wanted - so as to not give the house elves too much extra work.
"I'm really proud of you," Draco muttered quietly to Hermione, whose cheeks were still rather pink. "You've done so much this past term, I don't think you even realise how much you have done." Hermione seemed to squirm slightly uncomfortably, and Draco gently put his fingers underneath her chin and lifted it so her eyes were looking at him. "You are amazing." He bent down to kiss her, but an impatient noise broke their moment, Ginny was looking particularly disgruntled.
"Oh come on, do you have to?" She asked, "I mean, I'm kinda resigned to the fact you do that at all, but at the dinner table?" Both Hermione and Draco just laughed, noticing that Neville and Luna were looking slightly sheepish also.
"Okay, no kissing at the dinner table, alright?" Hermione offered.
"Good." Ginny agreed, lifting the lid off a dish which contained roast potatoes; Draco winked at Hermione and, finding her hand under the table, squeezed it tightly.
The meal passed pleasantly, with no major issues or arguments being proffered by Ginny (as she was the one most likely to create any problems); and by the time the food had all disappeared, the group around Hermione's table all felt incredibly relaxed and content. When the meal had finished and the students began to rise from their own tables and speak to friends at others, the band of musicians made their way up onto a built up stage behind the teacher's table. The tables right in the centre of the hall vanished, leaving only the ones around the edges of the hall with extra chairs - and making space for dancing. To Draco's surprise, his brain appeared to know what to do without conscious thought, holding his arm out, he placed one hand on Hermione's waist; her cheeks were very pink as the two of them began to dance to the first song the band played, along with several other couples.
Draco had never danced so much in her life, and he couldn't quite understand where the time was going! Before he knew it, it was twenty past eleven, the younger years had already been sent to bed at eleven, and he had been dancing for nearly three and a half hours. At one point Professor McGonagall had gotten up on the band platform and demanded that the band play a particular tune and proceeded to teach all the students how to do a Scottish dance called 'The Dashing White Sergeant', perhaps she had had too much mead, but she hadn't seemed very articulate while trying to explain. Hermione and him were flushed with their effort, but neither seemed to want to relinquish their grip on one another. During a particularly slow waltz, Hermione had wrapped her arms around Draco's neck, and he could feel the warmth of her body close to his, he leant forward and, placing a kiss on her cheek, whispered: "Thank you."
"What for?" She asked.
"For this term, for taking the time with me, for caring." Draco answered, "It means more than you will ever know."
"You don't need to thank me Draco." She responded, gently leaning her head near his shoulder.
"I want to..." He reinforced, and she smiled.
"You are too polite." She laughed quietly, and kissed him. Their rather perfect moment was interrupted, however, by a harsh voice near Hermione's shoulder.
"Urgh, I don't know how you could do that with him!" It was a younger, probably fifth year student. "You must be covered in slime from that scumbag, I don't know how you can stand it!" The girl who was accompanying him giggled loudly; for a second Hermione froze, Draco could feel her body go stiff. This was exactly the sort of reason why Draco had been reluctant to attend the ball in the first place, but now he was here he didn't feel as bothered as he thought he would.
"I don't really know either!" Draco commented with a laugh, the two individuals who had been laughing at the two of them stopped, an unpleasant sneer spreading over the boy's face. "But you know what? Perhaps it's because Hermione is a better person than you are! Perhaps it's because we all make mistakes, but it's how we deal with the fall out that actually matters, and she was the only one willing to help me - and I'll always be thankful, because I am the luckiest person on earth to be able to call her my girlfriend." The couple seemed slightly stunned by this reaction, blinking dumbly. "And if I were you, I'd run along before my beautiful girlfriend can ask you your names and houses and puts you in detention for the rest of the school year until you've learnt about respect and forgiveness!" The girl grabbed the sleeve of the boy's dress robes and pulled him away, through the rest of the dancing students, trying to get as far away from Draco and Hermione as they possibly could. Draco wrapped his arm around Hermione and pulled her into a hug.
"Draco..." Hermione muttered, almost breathlessly. "You... You're wonderful!"
"I'm not wonderful Hermione, I'm blessed and privileged to have you in my life." He answered, then he changed the subject abruptly. "Shall we go and get a drink? I'm rather thirsty after all that!"
The firm arm belonging to Draco which was around Hermione's waist began to steer her in the direction of the tables where the drinks were laid out. To his delight, a very pink Neville and dreamily smiling Luna were standing next to this table and hailed Hermione and Draco as they got closer.
"Having a good evening?" Draco asked Neville, who nodded fervently.
"Very good! Yourself?" Neville retorted.
"Really good, yeah! I don't think I've ever danced so much in my life though!" Draco laughed.
"I know!" Neville looked almost carefree, and Draco suddenly realised that this was the boy who he had taunted and tormented through most of his school life, and now he was standing next to him talking about dancing and it didn't feel a bit awkward at all.
"I'm going to get drinks," Hermione informed Draco and then seemed to disappear off into the small crowd around the drinks table.
"I'll give you a hand Hermione," Neville said and followed her towards the little table. Draco was left standing next to Luna, and the two of them watched the students who were still dancing; then Draco's attention was drawn to the Hogwarts emblems that Luna had been responsible for creating. They were still hovering ten or so feet above everyone's heads, but they were no longer static. They had paired up and seemed to be dancing in time to the music, and when the songs changed, the emblems changed partners so they equally shared dances with one another. It was really beautiful to watch.
"Did you plan that the emblems would swap dance partners like that?" Draco asked her.
"What?" She seemed to have been in her own world and Draco had broken into it with his question. "Oh yes, this is an interhouse ball after all..." She told him, "I thought it was a good idea."
"It is a really great idea! They look wonderful!" Draco responded, watching rather engrossed as the badger of Hufflepuff waltzed in circles with the Gryffindor lion.
"You really think so?" Luna didn't sound altogether convinced.
"Yeah!" He agreed, Luna's silver eyes studied him for a few long seconds and then she smiled.
"Most people think my creations are crazy." She explained honestly. "They think I'm crazy."
"They're the crazy ones, you're wonderful!" Draco disregarded the notion that Luna was crazy, she stared at him again.
"I don't think anyone has ever called me wonderful before..." She started slowly.
"I think..." Draco lowered his voice rather conspiratorially, not wanting anyone around them to hear. "That Neville thinks you are wonderful... And he will tell you that once he gets over his nerves!"
"That'll be nice." She nodded. "Neville is lovely." The two of them looked over to where Neville and Hermione were fighting their way back through the crowd to them, bottles of butterbeer clutched in their hands.
The evening was going to fast for all of their likings; Hermione and Draco had gone back to dancing a while before they heard the main clock in the centre of the school, which overlooked the courtyard, striking twelve. It was time for all the students to retire, however, many of them seemed eager to get in a few more dances - or a few more drinks - before being forced to go to bed. Luckily it was the teachers who were responsible for getting everyone to go to bed; Hermione couldn't have imagined she would end the night too favourably if she had to be the one to send everyone away. Eventually there was only a few stragglers left, and the ball committee, and some of their partners, had held back just to say a final well done and thank you to each other.
"I guess it's bed time then..." Hermione muttered, watching the last of the students climbing the marble staircase just visible out the door. "I was having such a good time... I wish it didn't have to end."
"I know..." Draco agreed, and holding out his arm he said: "Come on, I'll escort you up to your common room..." He smiled, and Hermione slipped her arm through the space that Draco provided. They took their time up the stairs, Hermione knew that they couldn't really spend too much time otherwise they would be pushing their luck with the teachers. She tried to plan reasons as to why it could be taking them so long to reach the seventh floor, but her mind could only come up with pitiful excuses like: 'My feet are sore from my shoes so it's taking me longer to get up the stairs'. She knew that sort of thing would be seen straight through, and really she just wanted to spend as much time in Draco's presence as she possibly could. They reached the seventh floor and slowed almost to the point of stopping.
"I'm really glad that you came with me tonight, Draco." Hermione told him. "It was amazing."
"I'm still glad you gave me the opportunity to come with you, and forgave me for being such an idiot about it at the beginning." Draco answered.
"I'll always forgive you." Hermione said.
"And you wonder why I tell everyone how wonderful you are!" Draco shook his head, "Not everyone would do that, but you did, and... And I love you for it." His words took a second to register in Hermione's head, but when they did she pulled him towards her so she could kiss him.
And her hands were in his hair, caressing the skin on the back of his neck as she kissed him; and shivers ran down his spine as he kissed her back. Their tongues had met, and Draco was aware of an explosion of adrenaline and endorphins going off inside him. His heart had sped up, his hands at her waist, holding her in towards him, he wanted her close; it was oblivion - it was utter, peaceful oblivion.
Neither of them realised that they were moving but somehow Hermione ended up with her back leaning against the wall, her foot hooked round Draco's ankle, pulling him closer into her - Draco could feel all the contours of her body pushing into him. They had no idea how long they had been there, how long they had been in that position, and they certainly weren't aware that they were being watched, until someone cleared their throat.
The two of them jumped apart, affronted that they had been caught; both of their faces flushed red with embarrassment, but it was only Professor McGonagall, wearing a rather 'I knew it' expression with a twinkle in her eye. Clearly she must be up here to check that all the students had gone to bed; she walked away without saying anything, continuing her tour for anyone else still out of bed. Hermione and Draco both stared at the floor, feeling slightly uncomfortable about having been caught and not sure what to do now.
"I should let you get to bed." Draco eventually broke the silence. "Thank you for tonight." He kissed Hermione on the cheek then, throwing caution to the wind, he said: "I love you Hermione." Her head jerked up to look at him, and she looked somewhat breathless.
"I love you too..." She whispered back.
A/N: If you've still stuck with this story for this long after a huge break, I apologise to you - my life got in the way and I'm sorry. I can only hope you enjoy this chapter, and I actually will get the next (and last) chapter up very quickly! I'd love to know what you think about this chapter :)