I think this will be my last attempt at ShinoSaku...sighs very, very heavily.
---
How can you be sure that the light is always good?
If you surround yourself with it, can you see your surroundings, do you not need darkness?
After all, everyone has a bit of black in them,
It is…what makes one human…
---
She promises to only close them for a minute.
In sixty seconds she'll be ready to continue watching.
She's only resting her eyes. It's not sleep; the demon will not win.
---
The monsters hide in the dark, do they not?
And the light?
In the light one is safe,
There, in your opinion, is where the creatures will not venture…
---
"Do you feel better?" the demon asks from his throne, spear in hand, veil-like flames surrounding him.
He wears a wicked grin, one that makes her draw back a step. Funny, how it's all that's visible of him.
The inferno encloses her.
'This is only a dream,' she tells herself when her heart gasps out and in, the flames surrounding her being the catalyst to such a terror.
Suddenly, the flames stop. The demon and his spear vanish.
'A dream?'
There are firefly's springing from the earth, coming out of a curtain of thin air.
"Do you feel better?" asks a voice.
But it's not the demon with his smirking tone.
This voice is calm and soothing. But she can not find the owner.
The firefly's encircle her, slowly revolving until their light is all she can see, but something is amiss, she covers her eyes and screams.
Blink, blink…
The light goes out…
'Finally…'
Do you now see?
That your light has something strange about it?
Look closely,
The demon will tell you, if with your own eyes, you are unable to see…
---
"Do you feel better?" asks a voice again, she registers the repetitiveness of this question, but it's a moment before she opens her eyes in recognition.
"Shino san!" she gasps, her eyes snapping open - but quickly close as light hits her retinas in painful collision.
"You fell asleep," he comments, as she regains her composure, only to realize that she's in his arms.
"Ah, I'm sorry," she apologizes, waiting for him to release her.
He doesn't let go. "Do you remember?"
She blinks, takes in the scenery about them.
A forest, she thinks, by the vast array of green. "Remember what?" she inquires.
"We were ambushed."
---
Step, and fly. Step, and fly. Step, and fly.
Follow. Follow.
Pause.
"We have to speed up, Sakura san, to reach our destination in time," says her team leader. "As well, distance will have to be forgoed, please tell that to Hinata," he orders, then continues.
"Yes," she says and remains paused on the branches of a tree to wait for said girl.
"Sakura san?" she asks when she arrives. "Are you alright.?"
"Yes, I'm fine," assures Sakura. "Shino san just wanted me to tell you that we will be speeding up ahead. We'll will have to ditch distance between us to keep from being discovered as we get closer."
"I see. Then let's get to Shino san," agrees Hinata.
She speeds past, and Sakura catches the fluttering of wings nestled in the strands of long hair.
---
"Back-up has arrived. Please confirm your position," asks Shino.
She can't see what he's doing because she is crouched behind him. But he lifts his arm, and something fluttering flies from his hand, taking to the sky.
"A bug," says Sakura quietly.
Shino nods. "Yes."
"Shino san always uses his bugs as messengers," says Hinata.
"I see," says Sakura. "Because electronics can be found on spies, and that would be exposing them?"
He nods. "As well, my bugs will not relate the message if our spies have been found but do not know it," says Shino.
"And they blend in," offers Hinata.
"…I see."
---
She blinks away sleep. If only she could close her eyes for sixty seconds.
"It's my turn now, Sakura san. You may rest."
Her tired eyes close in bliss.
"Thank you, Shino san."
She rests on the trunk of the tree, closes her eyes.
Hopes the demon will not come.
---
Have you ever heard someone scream?
Listened as they proclaimed in anguish that everything is a lie?
It's that light, those beings that bring it,
It's all your fault…
---
"It's those damn fireflies…they won't go away…"
There's a girl in the distance. She sits in a circle of light, her legs raised and protected in her arm's embrace.
She rests her cheek upon her bare knee.
The light, she finds, comes from the glow of flying creatures. They sail above her in an eerie ring, masking her unclothed body in shadows of darkness.
She walks to the girl, but keeps a few steps distance.
"Who are you?" she asks.
"They won't go away. I can't see a thing," says the girl, annoyed. 'It's all your fault.'
She doesn't understand, but then takes notice of the hue her hair reflects.
Pink.
She thinks perhaps that this is the girl she lost once upon a time.
Her younger self.
That inner girl that expressed herself at every turn.
"I can't see, you know. There's too much light. The fireflies won't leave…all your fault"
She looks up to the winged creatures, suddenly angry, frustrated for a reason that is just beyond her grasp. "Why won't you leave her alone?" she asks. "Is it you that blinds me like the demon says?"
She covers her eyes when the light glows brighter, her retinas burn, "I don't understand how light can be bad. Where does the light come from!" she screams.
- The light's go off. The girl is gone.
Fire roars in the distance.
She hesitates, but walks forward to the blaze.
---
There is a bright circle in the sky, do you see it?
An orb glowing in the night, can you reach it?
Those are corporeal sources,
As are the ones that are real in everyway,
Happiness is light,
But yours, I'm afraid is fa…
---
"Do you now know?" he asks, that terrible grin spreading in taunt.
"Blinded," she speaks, gratingly. "Why is it light? Should it not be darkness…darkness is bad, not light?"
"But light is all you ever showed. It becomes too much after time," the demon says casually.
- He launches his spear at her, it ends so close to her throat.
She keeps the scream inside the confines of her body, yet hears the shriek echo in synch with the staccato beat her heart trembles in.
The tip of the demon's spear touches her throat. "You never gave in, to the darkness. You instead worked hard to become better. Surrounded yourself with goals and ideals that you were adamant to achieve…There is no darkness for you, little girl…but there is too much light."
"To much light?" she gasps as the spear becomes malleable to tangle around her throat and shoulders.
"Too much façade," he whispers darkly, grinning.
"I don't understand," she bites out. She raises her hands to detangle herself from his metal.
It's not the soft alloy any longer.
It hisses near her ear. Tightens around her throat.
"Do you like my pet?" asks the demon.
"Snake," she whispers, her heart's pace speeds yet again.
"Yes," concurs the demon. "Why don't you look into it's eyes?"
She finds herself doing so.
Looks into red and spinning tomas.
"Too much of the light is fake. An attempt that keeps the darkness away successfully, but kills you in it's own way," says the demon.
She can't look away.
"It is why the girl who expressed all your emotions was lost to you, all you feel is an act, all you show is not real. All you are is basked in light that's a façade, that girl showed the true you, but that you no longer exists, you can not find her, she is too lost in the light," he laughs.
Terror wells up at his words, everything he says makes sense. Her heart falters as the snake rears back.
-The fire goes out. The demon is gone.
The snake remains and bares it's fangs.
The fireflies come one by one, she can see them in the distance. Coming in a straight line like soldiers do.
Darkness falls with the snake's bite.
It is more welcoming than the light, she thinks, because it is her wakening call.
---
The first ray of sunshine is what makes the day real, is it not?
The glow of the moon symbolizes the calm of the night, the need for sleep, do you agree?
You've slept enough,
Wake now!!!
---
Her eyes snap open, frantically she breathes in, strangling herself with air.
There are hands clapping against her back, helping her.
In a minute's time, in sixty seconds, she is fine again, she finds herself with her team's leader.
"Shino san," she says, acknowledging and sounding thankful in the same.
"Are you well?" he asks. She nods, her bobbing head reflects off his sunglasses in the light of the moon.
"Good."
She looks away from him, a bit uncomfortable, not knowing if his eyes were fixed on her or not, and if so, then in what kind of gaze. She looks around and finds that it is still night. Finds someone missing.
"Where is Hinata san?" she asks, straining her eyes in hope to find her hiding.
"She has gone back to Konoha," says Shino.
"What! Why?" she asks, bewildered.
"It seems that the team we came to assist did not need back-up after all," he begins to explain. "They arrived to our location with the guidance of the bug I sent earlier and headed back with Hinata."
Heat runs over her cheeks. "I was asleep," she realizes. "I was sleeping…I…can't believe …how long was I…?"
She is cut-off by his cool hand against her forehead. "Were you having a nightmare, Sakura san?" he asks.
She gapes. "Was I making noise?"
"No," he answers, "Hinata merely saw an increase in your heartbeat every so often…she came to theorize that you were dreaming badly."
"I see."
"I stayed behind with you to wait until you woke. I did not wish to startle you more than you already were."
"You waited with me?"
"Yes."
"Are we far behind them?"
"Maybe a few hours."
"I see."
They head out minutes later.
---
She blinks, takes in the scenery about them.
A forest, she thinks, by the vast array of green. "Remember what?" she inquires.
"We were ambushed."
"We were?"
"Yes," he assures. "However, I managed to evade my attackers on the warning from one of my bugs."
"How so?"
"I left one with Hinata like I always do, she and her companions glimpsed them a bit ahead, so she sent back the message.
"The fluttering thing in her hair…I noticed it for about a second…was that the…?"
"Yes, that was the bug."
"We were ambushed," she says. "I don't recall."
"You were sleeping again," says Shino. She can feel heat coat her as shame covers her.
"Asleep?"
"It seems you are ill, Sakura san…did you not notice?"
"No," she whispers, unable to comprehend how and when she fell asleep.
"It is said that such a thing is typical in medics…they take care of others…but not themselves," offers Shino, somehow aware of her thoughts.
"Yes…that might be…"
"Are you feeling unwell…we can rest a bit more if you like?"
"No," she says, rejecting the idea, "Let's continue to head back."
"As you wish."
---
She pushes the key in, twists it to unlock her door, stumbles in as she opens it.
"God, I need an aspirin," she groans.
She turns the light of her kitchen on, pours herself a glass of water, downs a pair of pills down with the clear elixir.
She shuts the light off, and clumsily makes her way to her room, climbing into bed once she gets there without changing clothes.
Looking up to catch her reflection on the mirror adorning her headboard she sees a light blinking on and off. The light flickers as her eyelids rise and fall.
The light goes off as she descents.
---
"Hinata san," says Sakura as said girl walks into her office after a polite knock on the door.
"Nice to see you, are you well?"
"Yes," says Hinata. "Are you, Sakura san?"
"Me? I'm fine," she laughs. "Take a seat," she offers, gesturing at the chairs in front of her desk with a motion of her hand.
"Sakura san, I just came to make sure you were alright. You seemed so ill at the end of our mission."
She blushes. "Yes, I was a bit unwell and didn't think of it until it affected me."
"Shino san also wanted to know if you were well," says Hinata. "He was worried…he mentioned something about a, a demon?"
She pales, feels shame well up. "So I was speaking in my sleep. I'll have to apologize."
Silence falls. Hinata's worried smile pains her.
"Shino san always places a bug on you?" she asks.
Hinata nods. "Yes, he does."
"Kiba as well," she asks.
"No," says Hinata, "I don't think so."
"Does that mean…?"
"Mean what?"
"Never mind."
The girl smiles, "He places them as a precaution…but mostly to watch over me" she explains.
"I see."
---
The fire is roaring.
"Take off my hood, so that you can see what lies within," he taunts, a familiar twisted grin on the contours of the face she wants to see.
"The snake," she accuses struggling in his embrace. "Why were it's eyes like that?…Like Sharingan eyes?"
He laughs darkly, "Because she is my pet, as well as a reflection of me."
"Go on, take my cloak off," he urges.
'a reflection of me'
'a reflection of me'
'a reflection of me!'
"Can you be? Can you be Sasuke?" she asks, her voice straining to hide any pain.
"I might, I might not be…find out for yourself."
She lifts her hands, her fingers find the edges to the hood of his cloak.
That grin is so near her.
So frightening in it's proximity.
She pushes away suddenly, falling on her back away from him.
There are lights above her, over the reach of the fire.
They flicker.
'It's those damn fireflies…they won't go away…'
'Your fault…your fault…'
---
"Do you feel better now?" he asks.
He sits on a stone, his legs crossed. The sky is night and the fireflies circle around him.
"No," she says, hesitating to walk to him.
"Do you wish to speak of it?" he offers.
What she wishes is that she could see his expression.
"I don't know," she admits.
She watches as one firefly comes to land on his outstretched hand. He brings it close to his mouth and whispers something inaudible to her ears.
The creature flies away when he is done, to join the others winding around Shino.
-They cease their pattern and one by one, in a line, like soldiers march, make their way to her person.
They are fast, and soon encircle her,and in the night all she can see is light.
And darkness where there are no fireflies to stem the gap. She feels trapped in the light, and reaches for the dark that although painful, is at least real. She can not reach it, the fireflies are too fast, and she's too wary.
She falls to her knees, clutches her head roughly with her palms. "I didn't want to suffer," she gasps.
One by one the fireflies leave to head back to their master. "What did you want?" he asks in that calm, soothing voice.
"I wanted to continue my life. I wanted to believe that there was something in my life other than him. That I was capable," she wept.
"But?"
"But. But, the demon says that I drove the darkness away in the wrong manner. With too much light. By fooling myself. By pretending I was happy and had moved on when I really hadn't."
"How long have you known this demon, Sakura san?" he asks.
Her eyes flicker in confusion, then widen. "Since this past mission," she says. "Since I saw that bug in Hinata san's hair."
He is walking to her. He kneels before her. "Is it because we glimpsed him, Sakura san. By seeing him again you remembered the misery he caused you, and everything you worked to bury with light."
"How do you know this Shino san?" she asks.
He is silent, and she sees desperate eyes reflected on his sunglasses. "One overlooks many things when in a reckless passion."
"Reckless passion?"
"Your quest to become strong."
"You were…?"
"Watching you? Yes, I was."
"I see."
"Do you?"
"Yes."
"You love Hinata."
He falters. "No," he says, and takes off his glasses. She can see confusion marring them.
"No?" she asks, becoming a bit breathless as he leaves his rock and comes to her. He extends his hand to her.
She takes it, and finds herself being pulled up to his chest.
"Why would I watch you, but love Hinata?"
"Me, then?"
"Yes, you."
"Why?"
"That is complicated," he says, and runs his hand through her hair. He shows it to her after a while, there is a firefly resting on his palm. "I've seen that before," she says, "last night, I think."
He nods. "Do you remember well, when we saw Uchiha Sasuke?"
She thinks. "Not very," she confesses.
"He," begins Shino, "Attacked you with Chidori, and you, as this firefly has related to me, did nothing to move. The firefly called for it's family, and they surrounded you as protection."
"I was alone," says Sakura. "I was scouting, I remember, then I saw him, and then there was so much light...I don't remember after that"
"You must understand that the fireflies did not protect you from Uchiha's attack. This one told me that he called down his attack," says Shino, indicating to the bug on his hand.
"I became ill after that," says Sakura, "From those dreams?"
"I believe so."
"There where fireflies in my dreams, was it because they tried to protect me?"
"Perhaps."
"I see."
Do you see clearly now?
Is your soul's light true?
Then get up, waking is not enough,
Begin your life again,
Day and night is all you need…
---
Clarification time, starts...now!
Lines like this:
The monsters hide in the dark, do they not?
And the light?
In the light one is safe,
There, in your opinion, is where the creatures will not venture…
are actually 'Inner Sakura,' Who was lost to Corporeal Sakura when she became too...fake.
Lines like:
"Shino san," she says, acknowledging and sounding thankful in the same.
"Are you well?" he asks. She nods, her bobbing head reflects off his sunglasses in the light of the moon.
"Good."
are flashbacks.
Any questions please review and I will get back to you. Or go on my LJ and message, since I don't take PM's.
Also, any requests?