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(Wheezzy8, JadedLights07, hogwarts1welshwitch, more1weasley , Guest, Waffleyum, awkwardHanna, c00k1es, MaryLeboneFirst, maxima98)
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December 22, 1980
The next day, Marlene felt asshe had lost control of her mind. No matter how hard she tried, she could not keep her attention in the room. Her thoughts were continuously escaping back to the strange dream of the night before. Because that was all it could have been. Just a dream, right? But it had felt so real. And so right. Something about the oh-so-familiar faces of the other children resonated deep inside her. But the oldest boy had used magic. He had a magic wand! And that was what kept her from telling Fiona that she thought she was getting her memories back. Magic wands...it couldn't have been real. Just a dream.
But almost the second she got Addie down to sleep that night, she crawled under her covers and slammed her eyes shut, willing herself to sleep with all her might. Even if it was only a dream, it was the most familiar thing she had seen since waking in the hospital months before. And it felt wonderful.
.
September 1, 1971
Marlene sat alone in the train compartment as it pulled out of the station. Merrick, Mack, and Mal had all offered her seats with their friends, but she refused to depend on her older siblings for socializing. However, now that she found herself alone in a compartment, not having come across any of the other first years that she was familiar with, she was wondering if that had been such a good idea. Shrugging to herself, she smoothed her hands over the fine pale blue fabric of her dress and made sure the buttons on the cuffs lay straight. She was a McKinnon, she did not need the presence of others to feel confident, and she always looked perfectly -
"Can I join you? Everywhere else is full." A redhead with pretty green eyes asked brightly, standing in the now-open compartment door.
"Sure," Marlene nodded, gesturing to the seat facing her.
The other girl sighed in relief, and dragged her heavy trunk into the compartment before collapsing onto the bench. Marlene eyed her curiously. She was very pretty, and looked to be a first year as well. But it was her clothing that was so very interesting. She was wearing little plaid shorts - Shorts! How improper! - with a white cotton t-shirt and blue trainers. Muggle clothes, Marlene deduced. Was this girl a muggle-born? Marlene had never met one before, and she would never be caught dead in such sloppy, improper attire. She looked down at the perfect, knee length hem of her dress and her polished, dragonhide shoes fondly. Mother and Merrick would be so proud.
"Well hello! I'm Lily!" The other girl smiled at her. "What's your name?"
"Marlene McKinnon. It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss...Lily," she finished awkwardly. The other girl had not offered her family name. How utterly impolite.
The girls smiled shyly at each other, and Marlene found that perhaps Lily's less than proper dress and decorum were not quite so bad after all. The redhead had a particularly sunny countenance about her, and seemed to make the train compartment just a bit brighter.
"What house do you want to be in?" Lily asked, pulling one leg up underneath her on the seat.
"Gryffindor. No question. That's where all my brothers and my sister have been sorted," Marlene replied. And forgetting to worry about wrinkling her dress, she folded her legs up crosswise and adopted Lily's casual demeanor.
"I'm hoping to be in Slytherin because that's where my friend wants to go; he says it's the best. But he says Ravenclaw wouldn't be so bad. He should be here soon," the readhead offered eagerly. Marlene's eyebrows shot up towards her hairline.
"Slytherin, really? What's your family name, Lily?"
"Evans, why?" Lily cocked her head to the side curiously.
"Oh...no reason."
.
September 1, 1971
As Marlene and the other first years made to enter the Great Hall, she shifted closer to her little clump of friends comprised of Lucas Avery, Godwin Mulciber, Sophronia Fawley, Anderson Smith, and Sirius Black. Suddenly, the Sorting Ceremony, which had never caused her an ounce of worry in her life, seemed incredibly threatening. The presence of the children she had grown up with was proving very reassuring. She knew that Anderson would go to Hufflepuff, Lucas, Godwin, Sophronia, and Sirius to Slytherin, and she to Gryffindor, but when she caught Godwin's gaze and he gave her a shy smile, she felt the butterflies in the butterflies in her stomach settle...
"McKinnon, Marlene!" Professor McGonagall called shrilly, and Marlene's heart flew into her throat.
She had never worried about the sorting, but when the hat had shouted "Gryffindor!" after six long minutes atop Sirius Black's head, she realized all bets were off. The fleeting look of terror that had flashed across his face at the hat's declaration was not encouraging in the slightest.
Squaring her shoulders and tossing her long hair back, she marched purposefully to the front of the clump of first years and sat herself atop the stool. She didn't even feel the hat touch the top of her head before the loud cry of "GRYFFINDOR!" echoed through the hall.
She caught Merrick's eye and shared a proud smile with her older sister, grinned at Mack and Mal leading a standing ovation, and flounced over the her new house table, settling herself into the empty spot beside Sirius Black.
He was staring at the grain of the table with a blank gaze, but brightened up immediately and plastered a slightly broken grin on his handsome face.
"Marlene! Fancy the two of us being in the same house?" He said brightly, but Marlene's brow creased.
"Stop trying to be funny, Sirius. You know your parents are going to murder you. Not that I know how they couldn't have thought this would be a possibility for you," she replied with a little smirk. Sirius had always been a bit of a black sheep - or a white sheep in a Black family, perhaps. A Gryffindor placement was all fine and well for her - despite her father being a Slytherin and her mother a Ravenclaw, but it was a hanging sentence for the Black heir.
"Oh relax, McKinnon. And I'm sure your parents were very worried. After all, I had you pegged as Hufflepuff for sure!" Sirius teased, brushing off her concern.
"Oi! Black!" A voice came from a few seats down the table.
"Hey Mack!" Sirius greeted her brother, knowing him well after years of pureblood society gatherings together.
"You'd better not be teasing little Marl about going into Hufflepuff," Mack said with mock-seriousness.
"We were all quite worried you see," Mal joined in.
"Mal!" Marlene hissed. Her brothers were always trying to embarrass her in public.
"But now we see there was nothing to be worried about!" Mack gave an exaggerated laugh.
"You're not a disappointment after all, sis!" Mal said brightly, earning curious looks from the table's other occupants.
"Don't you guys have people your own age to bother?" Marlene grumbled, tucking into her shepherd's pie and glaring at Sirius' laughing form beside her.
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October 28, 1971
Marlene huffed in frustration as her feather quill, which she was attempting to levitate a few feet above her seat on the plush carpet of Gryffindor tower, once again slammed into the ceiling. She was having trouble controlling the amount of power she out into her spellwork. Professor McGonagall said it was because she was too hot-headed. She wished she could tell Professor McGonagall where to stick it.
"Do you want some help?" A soft voice came from above her. Marlene looked up into the kind face of a girl with blue eyes and black hair pulled into a neat ponytail.
"Why would you think I need help?" Marlene snapped, embarrassed. "Do I look like I need your help?"
"I didn't mean to offend you! It's just, I know Flitwick gave the first years a tough task for tonight and you looked a little frustrated..." The girl trailed off at Marlene's slightly hostile expression.
"Who are you, anyway?" Marlene didn't recognize her, which probably meant she wasn't from one of the old families.
"Dorcas Meadowes. I'm only the year above you, you know." Oh, that's right. The girl was a half-blood. No wonder she was unfamiliar.
"Right whatever," Marlene grumbled, still fighting down a blush.
"Fine, I'll just go. Good luck with your work then," Dorcas snapped, and Marlene instantly felt rather guilty.
"Wait!" Marlene called, stopping the older girl from stomping away."You wouldn't happen to know how to keep from levitating my quill through the ceiling every time I cast the spell, would you?"
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December 23, 1980
Marlene woke to Addie's hungry wails. Shaking her head several times and wincing at the sharp pain that shot through her temple, she climbed from her bed and went to feed her daughter. Her head was spinning. These dreams...they weren't dreams. She couldn't explain it, but she just knew they were memories. But magic? Magic?! It was impossible. Improbable. Perhaps... But she wouldn't say anything to anyone about it just yet. Her first instinct had been to go charging off into the night with nothing but Addie to go find this family of her dreams, but something held her back. So far, she had repeated what seemed to be every memory she had of the first eleven or so years of her life. Some events stood out more than others, but it was all there.
She was Marlene McKinnon, born on November 24, 1959 and was twenty-one years old. She had a father, Malise, a stern but doting man, the scion of their family, and an accomplished auror along with his brother Manus and Manus's oldest son, Greer. Her mother, Deirdre, was a beautiful kind woman and a Fawley by birth. She had five siblings, four brothers and one sister. Michael at seven years older, Merrick at six years older, twins Mackenzie and Malcolm two years older, and little Maxwell one year her junior.
She came from one of the "Sacred Twenty-Eight" old wizarding families, and though her family was not opposed to people of impure blood per se, she had grown up completely isolated from them and all influences of the muggle world.
Her closest friends growing up had been Lucas Avery, Godwin Mulciber, Sophronia Fawley (her second cousin, once removed), Anderson Smith, and Sirius Black. She showed a particular aptitude for Potions, which was surprising because she seemed to have trouble putting any measure of control or preciseness behind her spellwork, let alone something as neddlesome as potion-making. Everything she cast seemed to have a bit too much power behind it, but her professors assured her that if she could control her emotions, she could control her magic. She had an explosive temper, a loyal streak, desperately loved her family, and was rubbish at quidditch.
She should have been elated. She finally had begun to gain the history and memories she yearned for so desperately, but something did hold her back. Despite the overwhelming number of memories that had flooded her mind over the past two nights, she still did not know how she had come to be found unconscious on the side of a muggle road only to wake up weeks later in a muggle hospital with no recollection as to what had happened. And something was telling her she should wait for that particular memory to return until she made any decisions. Something wasn't right, and she didn't just have herself to worry about. She was responsible for Addie too. And every time she slipped into a new memory, she felt as if she were charging towards a cliff, towards some horrific inevitability that she just had to wait for as she watched the many moments of her life rush by in her dreams.
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May 30, 1981
Marlene turned out the light and snuggled into her little bed listening to the sound of rain softly pattering against her window. She could hear Addie's sleep-heavy breathing coming from her crib on the other side of the room. It was May, 1981 now. Addie was nine months old, and said her first word "Dada" two weeks prior. Marlene had cried for hours until Fiona returned from her shift and was able to calm her down. It had been five months since those two strange nights of blissful memories - or perhaps they were only dreams, after all - and she still had not told a soul of the things she had seen when she fell asleep.
Every morning when she woke to find that she had had a normal night of sleep with no dreams of large, loud families or schools of magic she felt a cloak of disappointment settle deeper into her bones. She found herself floating in a cruel limbo - yearning to get on with her life, whatever that meant, but unable to release the possibility of a secret world so rich with love and magic she could taste it. It was time to move forward, get an education and a better job, hopefully find a home one day for her and Addie, but she just couldn't let go...
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October 7, 1971
Marlene and Sirius walked together down the Charms corridor on a Sunday afternoon in October. It was raining outside, but the two were filled with restless energy, so the afternoon found the pair tossing a fanged frisbee back and forth, awarding themselves extra points if they could send it through a ghost or hit a Slytherin. The two Gryffindors were practically joined at the hip, they spent so much time together. They were childhood playmates, and that comfort and security bled over into their relationship at Hogwarts.
Tensions were increasing outside the walls of the school with the rise of the growing dispute over blood and some dark wizard calling himself "Voldemort." This had resulted in Sirius and Marlene becoming a bit estranged from their friends in Slytherin, and harboring insecurities over who to befriend in their own house. Sirius had already received two howlers from his family concerning his sorting - one from his mother that had shrieked so loudly it likely disturbed the owls in the owlery, and one from his father that had simply burst into flames - and was worried about becoming acquainted with anyone of whom they would disapprove. Marlene was unsure as to where her family stood in the coming war, and therefore was left with Sirius as her only safe option for friendship in her year in Gryffindor - not that she minded, she and Sirius got on splendidly. In their year, James Potter was the only other pureblood, but his family were blood-traitors, and everyone else was either a half-blood or a muggleborn. Sirius and Marlene had both discovered that they didn't really find their less pure housemates to be any different from themselves, but remained wary of going out on a limb and befriending someone who would get them into trouble.
These things considered, they were caught entirely off guard when James Potter himself came tearing around the end of the corridor red in the face and breathing hard.
"Slytherins - this way - pranked - angry - hide!" He panted, grabbing Sirius and Marlene by the sleeves of their robes and dragging the into the nearest classroom, leaving the fanged frisbee lying discarded outside.
"What are you going on about?" Marlene hissed, glaring at the bespectacled boy.
James held up a hand and shushed her as he doubled over, trying to catch his breath.
"Are you just going to let him shush you like that?" Sirius teased her in a whisper, earning himself an elbow to the gut.
"Well?" Marlene said impatiently when James straightened up.
"I got Peeves to help me prank a couple of Slytherin third years, but they saw me so I had to run. It's not like I could have dueled all of them at once," James explained.
"Are you implying you could have dueled any of them at all?" Sirius let out a bark-like laugh.
"Of course I -" James retorted before Marlene clapped a hand over both boys' mouths.
"Shhh!"
The sound of running footsteps in the corridor reached them through the classroom door.
"I thought he came this way?" One voice asked, a boy.
" I was sure he did! Sneaky little blood-traitor," the second voice hissed.
"Hey look at this!" A third voice exclaimed.
Sirius and Marlene exchanged a horrified look. Their frisbee!
"Brilliant! I've been wanting one of these," the second voice said.
"Whatever, we'll find the little twerp later and teach him a lesson," said a fourth voice. "Bring the frisbee, I suppose."
The three Gryffindors waited in silence as they listened to the footsteps retreat the way they'd come before letting out a collective breath of relief.
"You got our frisbee stolen!" Sirius accused, rounding on James.
"I didn't do anything! You're the ones that left it in the hallway!" James replied hotly.
"Yes, but we wouldn't have left it there if you hadn't dragged us in here in the first place! It's not like we're the ones who pranked the Slytherins. We didn't have to hide at all!" Marlene complained.
"You think they care? Just because you're good little purebloods, they were going to leave you alone? You're Gryffindors too, and that's all that matters. Blood's not important if you get in their way," James hissed.
The room went silent as his words sunk in. It suddenly didn't seem as if they were just discussing house rivalries anymore. Marlene felt incredibly uncomfortable.
"Come on, Marl," Sirius said, placing a hand on her back and steering her out of the room. "Let's just get out of here."
Marlene allowed him to lead her out into the halls, but spoke up once they rounded the next corner. "Sirius - what he said about blood not being important if you get in the way...you don't think -"
"Yeah, I do think he's right. And I'm not just talking about Slytherin third years."
Two weeks later, the incident in the Charms corridor almost entirely forgotten, Sirius and Marlene were surprised to find James Potter approaching them for the second time in less than a month. The boy wasn't running this time, however, and had a familiar looking fanged frisbee clutched in his hand. He stood awkwardly beside their seats in the common room where they had been working on their Potions homework, and they looked up at him expectantly.
"Uh, here," he said, shoving the toy into Marlene's lap. "Thought you guys might want this."
"How did you get it back?" Marlene asked.
"Oh, I have my ways," he winked at her cheekily before giving a little bow and retreating.
Sirius and Marlene exchanged a significant glance. Marlene nodded, and Sirius turned in his chair to call after James, "Wait, Potter!"
James turned, looking at them curiously.
"Want to, uh, do you want to work on the Potions essay with us? Marlene here's pretty brilliant at it, you see and -"
"Absolutely," James said, throwing his school bag on the table and settling into the third chair. He tossed Marlene a warm smile.
She looked over at Sirius and he grinned, shrugging.
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November 9, 1971
Sirius and Marlene sat shoulder to shoulder in the stairwell of the Astronomy tower enjoying the last of a tin of biscuits that had come in the post from Marlene's mother for Sirius' birthday a week prior. They would have been freezing from the November wind whistling down the stairwell from the top of the open tower, but Sirius had conjured two little blue flames in glass jars that kept them surprisingly warm. They were without the third addition to their little trio, James Potter, for almost the first time since he had retrieved their frisbee a month earlier.
"So I was talking to James," Marlene ventured after she swallowed a mouthful of biscuit.
"What about?" Sirius asked, his speech a little garbled.
"Ew, Sirius, don't talk with food in your mouth," she giggled.
He only grinned in response, a few crumbs stuck to his lips.
"Anyway," she rolled her eyes. "James fancies himself in love with Lily Evans."
Sirius started choking on his biscuit, and Marlene had to thump him heavily on the back until he started breathing normally.
"Lily Evans? As in Lily Evans the mu...ggleborn?" He bit his lip at his near slip. Having grown up in a household where blood slurs were commonplace, it had proved rather difficult for him to cut them out of his vocabulary.
"Mmhmm," Marlene nodded, worrying her own lip nervously. "I know."
After all, how did one express that they weren't quite approving of their friend's choice in crush because of her blood?
"She is rather pretty," Sirius said.
"Yes," Marlene agreed. "And I reckon she's top of our year too. She's also very nice."
"A bit swotty for my tastes," Sirius interjected, chuckling. "Remus Lupin is also a bit brilliant."
And suddenly their conversation wasn't just about whether Lily Evans was worthy of their friend or not. Remus Lupin, after all, was a half-blood.
"He really is. And Dorcas Meadowes helps me with my charms sometimes," she offered.
"Yeah, and as much as I hate to admit it, that Snape kid might be better than you at potions," Sirius teased, shoving her gently with his shoulder.
Marlene let out a hollow little laugh that fell flat in the shadowed stairwell. The two sat in silence for several minutes, lost in thought.
"Do you..." Sirius seemed to struggle for words. "Do you think they - my parents and the others - they might be...wrong?"
There was no need to specify just what the Blacks might be wrong about.
"I'm scared to decide," Marlene mumbled. Blood purity was an issue that went largely undiscussed in her home, but she had been feeling a growing desperation to pick a side on the issue. And what she wanted to pick and what she felt she should pick were very different things. She could only imagine how Sirius was feeling, with such a staunchly prejudiced family.
"Me too," Sirius whispered. "But...but I'm going to."
Marlene looked at him in surprise with wide eyes. Suddenly, he jumped to his feet.
"I don't give a damn what my parents think!" He hissed, kicking at the stone wall. "They hate me already for ending up in Gryffindor! And just..." he started to lose steam, and sunk to his knees in front of Marlene. "They're just wrong, Marl. I know they are, and you know it too." He looked at her searchingly, his gray eyes hopeful.
"I...I do. You're right. Who cares if Lily Evans is a muggleborn!" She pulled them to their feet, her blood on fire with her rebellious declaration. "Sirius I think...I think it's time we made some more friends."
"I think you're right."
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July 2, 1981
When Marlene opened her eyes, it was to the sight of Fiona leaning over her. Her body felt heavy and her mouth dry.
"Shh, dearie," Fiona soothed. "You've got a nasty fever. I've got the day off, so leave Addie to me, and I'll call the market to let them know you're ill."
Marlene nodded deliriously, her eyes rolling in her head.
"Just go back to sleep," Fiona's voice whispered, distorted as if it were coming through a pane of glass. "Just go back to sleep, Marlene...
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Marlene sat on the sofa in the downstairs drawing room, slumped against Merrick's shoulder. Max was on Mer's other side, his head in her lap, and for once, the older McKinnon girl had not a word to say about his lack of propriety.
The cuffs of Marlene's black mourning robes felt like manacles around her wrists.
It was March, and the gray weather reflected perfectly the atmosphere inside the McKinnon household, for Malise Mckinnon, her proud, strong father was dead. As was her Uncle Manus, and her cousin Greer. The three had been killed by Death Eaters on an auror mission a week ago.
James Potter was right.
Blood wasn't important if you got in the way.
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Marlene and her siblings, save for Michael who was in his first year of training for the auror office with their remaining cousin, Calum, returned to Hogwarts on the second of April to hushed whispers and pointed fingers. It had come as quite a shock to the entire wizarding community that not even one of the oldest and purest families, not to mention one that hadn't been labelled as blood-traitors, was immune to Voldemort's forces. If the McKinnons weren't safe, who was?
Marlene walked through the halls flanked by her friends, Sirius on one side with James and their friends Remus and Peter, Lily and Mary MacDonald on the other. She felt safe, protected, loved. She felt absolutely alone.
The group of Gryffindor first years arrived for their double potions lesson several minutes early which turned out to be a grave mistake. Waiting in the corridor outside the classroom was the entirety of the Slytherin first years talking and laughing loudly with a duo of Slytherin fourth years. The corridor went silent the moment the two groups noticed each other.
Expect for Marlene. Her sharp intake of breath echoed of the walls when she caught sight of Lucas Avery. His father, Taeturius, had been among those implicated in the attack that killed her father, uncle, and cousin. She felt Lily's hand land on her shoulder, but she shrugged it off and marched up to Lucas before Sirius could cotton on and stop her.
Lucas saw her approach and broke away from his friends to meet her. They stopped toe to toe, and he cocked a brow at her, his green eyes cold. How could this boy in front of her be someone she had considered one of her best friends? Someone with whom she had found comfort before they had been sorted into different Houses? She didn't even know him anymore.
"Your father -" She snarled, but he interrupted her.
"What about him? And here I thought the issue was your father," he sneered, glancing over his shoulder to grin at the Slytherins.
"Don't you talk about my father!" Marlene's voice began to rise.
"What did you expect, McKinnon?" He shot a pointed look at her friends standing behind her. "Now you know what happens when you befriend traitors and filth."
Marlene didn't think to use her words.
Hell, she didn't even think to use her wand.
The next thing she knew, Avery's skull made a cracking noise as it slammed into the stone floor from the force of Marlene leaping on top of him.
"Marlene!" She felt someone pulling on her arm, trying to stop her.
But she didn't want to stop. She pulled up on his shoulders and slammed him back into the ground, enjoying the way his eyes bulged just before he fell unconscious.
"MARLENE!" Arms wrapped around her torso, lifting her up and away.
She kicked her legs and thrashed about, but finally fell still when she found herself unable to escape. Gasping for breath, she looked up into Sirius' face when she felt his arms relax.
"You're not gonna beat me up too, are you?" He asked, trying to keep his tone light.
She opened her mouth to respond, but was interrupted by the sound of Avery groaning as he came to and sat up, wiping at the blood pooling at the back of his head Sirius held onto her wrists as she approached him, leaving her unable to attack, but allowing her to lean down so they were nose to nose.
She narrowed her eyes at him, enjoying the way he flinched, and she hissed,"Now you know what happens when you talk about my father."
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Marlene sat between Lily and Mary on the bench at the opening feast of her second year. The newly dubbed "Marauders" sat across from them. James was trying unsuccessfully to catch Lily's eye, and she and Sirius kept trying (rather successfully) to kick each other under the table.
Marlene paused in her attack against Sirius' shins to crane her neck and try to catch a glance of her brother, Max. The Sorting Ceremony was well underway, and McGonagall was nearing the M names. She knew Max was nervous, but he had nothing to worry about. He would be in Gryffindor, but even if he ended up in Slytherin he'd still be her little brother...she'd just have more to tease him about.
"McKinnon, Maxwell!" McGonagall announced, and Marlene practically stood in her seat trying to catch her brother's eye.
Just as he sat himself upon the stool, his terrified gaze met Marlene's, and she offered him a wink and an encouraging smile. She watched him shoulders relax at the gesture, and then the hat was placed upon his head. After about a minute, the hat shouted "GRYFFINDOR!" and the table erupted into cheers. She squeezed Max's hand as he passed her on his way down to an empty seat across from Mack and Mal.
As she watched the twins lean across the table to ruffle Max's hair, she found herself awash in a wave of much needed peace.
.
Sirius and Marlene sat tucked into their favorite spot in the Astronomy Tower stairwell for the first time of their third year. It was just after dinner on their second night back.
"So how was your summer really?" Marlene asked, nudging him with her shoulder. She had been unable to see Sirius all summer, and when she wrote him to ask why he wasn't allowed out, he simply wrote back in a curt letter saying he'd tell her in September.
"Reg's gotten more annoying, my parents are monsters. Just the usual, you know?" He let out a hollow little chuckle and leaned back to rest his elbows on a stair.
"Sirius..." He was lying. What had happened to her friend?
"My Aunt Lucretia died, did you know? She was my dad's older sister." He said it in an offhand way, as if he were talking about his brother's goldfish or something of the like.
"I didn't. Why didn't your family host a big funeral reception or something?" It was quite odd, actually, that she hadn't heard. Usually, deaths in the old pureblood families were big events, morbidly enough.
"I'm not sure, but...but I heard my mum and dad talking about it, and - and my dad said it was his fault?"
"Was it?"
"I don't think so. Mum told him it wasn't, but he seems...different now. He's not the same," Sirius mumbled the last bit, rubbing at his shoulder uncomfortably.
Something curled in Marlene's stomach. "Different, how? Sirius?"
He pretended he hadn't heard her.
"Sirius, stop being an idiot and tell me what happened."
"You're so bloody demanding." His joke fell flat. "He's different. He's angrier."
Marlene took in the hard line of his mouth and the steely expression in his eyes. Her heart clenched.
"Did he - did he hurt you?" She whispered.
"Ha!" His bark like laugh echoed harshly off the stone walls. "He's always been one to favor a slap over a tongue-lashing like my mum - although I've always preferred it that way. Mum's downright vicious. But he's worse now."
Orion Black was beating Sirius? Not just cuffing his ears or giving him a slap when he misbehaved, but actually beating him?
"Are-are you okay?" Because what else was she supposed to say?
"Oh yeah, I'm just fine. Mum healed it all before they put me on the train. I don't know what I expected from her, but it was more than just that. I guess I thought that even though she thinks I'm a shame on the family she'd have stopped him, but she didn't." And to Marlene's surprise, the fact that his mother had not stopped his father seemed to hurt him more than the beatings had.
"Maybe your mum is scared of him?" She offered.
"I reckon you're right. He's like a completely different person. Even Reg is scared of him..." Sirius trailed off, picking at a loose thread on his shirtsleeve. "Pumpkin pasty?" He asked suddenly, pulling a few of the sweets from his robes.
"Uh, no thanks," she replied, caught off guard. "I'm allergic to pumpkin."
"Your loss," he shrugged, taking a bite out of one.
Marlene sighed and leaned her head down to rest on his shoulder. It seemed she wasn't the only one who didn't have a father anymore.
"I'm sorry." Her words had the entirely wrong effect.
Sirius stiffened and jerked away from her.
"I don't want your sympathy, Marlene. If you're going to treat me like that then just leave!"
"No! No, I didn't -" Marlene scrambled.
Sirius looked like a different person when he was angry, his handsome features darkening and twisting. It was in those moments that he truly looked like a member of his family. He looked mad.
"Please. We can talk about something else," she pleaded.
"Fine," he finally relaxed, like someone had let the air from a balloon. "Did I tell you about Susan Parkers?"
"What?" Marlene asked dumbly. She couldn't keep up with the change of subject.
"Susan Parkers, Hufflepuff in fourth year. I snogged her in a broom cupboard on the fifth floor last night," he said proudly.
Her mouth opened and closed like a fish, and she felt her chest grow hot. Why was he telling her this? She was suddenly quite sure she didn't want to hear this.
"That's nice?" She said uncertainly.
"But that's just it!" Sirius snickered, and she found herself cracking a smile. "It wasn't nice at all! She slobbered all over me. Oh Marls, it was dreadful."
Marlene joined in his infectious laughter. Talking about Susan Parkers, the terrible snogger, seemed to have lifted his spirits considerably. It was as if their previous conversation had not even occurred. And if that's what it took to make him laugh...
"Well that's what you get for snogging a 'Puff. Besides, how do you know you weren't the one doing all the slobbering?" she teased.
"Oi! Don't insult my snogging, McKinnon! We've all got to start somewhere!"
The pair dissolved into giggles, and Marlene was glad to know that no matter how dark things got for her friend, the thought of slobbering Hufflepuffs could still brighten his mood.
.
July 3, 1981
Marlene felt as if she had ten pound weight hanging from her lashes as she struggled to open her eyes. Her mouth was dry and tasted something foul, but she thankfully spotted a full glass of water on the bedside table. She shimmied up the bed into a slumped sitting position against the headboard and greedily gulped down the water. She was just draining the last few drops when the door to her bedroom creaked open. Fiona came through, smiling when she saw Marlene awake and sitting up.
"Someone's been missing you," the older woman said sweetly, stepping aside so Addie could crawl in on her chubby little baby limbs.
"Oh, hello angel. I've missed you too," Marlene crooned roughly, her voice ragged from disuse.
Fiona helped Addie up onto the bed so she could greet her mother.
"Mumma!" Addie shrieked excitedly, and Marlene felt her face split in a grin.
She would never get used to how wonderful it was to hear Addie's little voice, even if the only words the baby girl could say were "Mumma," "Dada," and "Ona" for "Fiona." Marlene had since curbed her bad habit of talking about Addie's "Daddy" when the two were alone together after the first word debacle, and it thankfully seemed to have faded from the little girl's vocabulary a bit.
"Are you feeling better dear? You had a bit of a nasty fever," Fiona said, pushing Marlene's hair from her sweaty forehead.
"Yes, I'm alright," Marlene replied honestly. "Just a bit stiff," she paused, "And dirty. Mer-um-goodness, I could use a shower."
Marlene's heart began to race at her near slip. She had almost said Merlin! That would not have gone over to well. Fiona would think she was losing her mind. Was she?
"Well you certainly don't smell like a rose," the older woman teased. "How about you take a nice shower, and Addie and I will get a little supper set for you? I'm sure you're hungry."
Marlene's stomach rumbled loudly in agreement. The two women chuckled, and Addie poked curiously at her mother's stomach.
"I'd say you're quite right."
"I'll put some broth on then, and we can see if you're up for more later," Fiona patted her hand before scooping Addie up from the bed and leaving the room.
Several minutes later, Marlene stared unseeingly at the white tile of the shower wall. The water turned blindingly hot cascaded over her body, slicking her hair to her skin and washing the fever sweats down the drain. Her hands shook, and she had to brace them on either side of her head to steady them. The dreams-memories-visions? had been so much more intense this time. So much more vivid. It had been so long since the last time she had lived a double life in her sleep; she thought it was over. She had written it off as a series of strange dreams produced by her yearning to have her true memories returned.
But now, now, she couldn't ignore it. The tantalizing possibility was too much to resist. She had to prove it somehow. She couldn't just pick up Addie and go looking for the people she had dreamed about; it wasn't safe. Her last dreams had been of a world on the brink of open warfare, and that coupled with the strange circumstances of her admittance to the hospital almost a year and a half prior led her to believe that it would be more prudent to stay safe at Fiona's. But she was a Gryffindor! She was supposed to be brave...but she wasn't. She was scared.
So she needed to find some way to prove that what she had dreamt was real without putting herself or Addie in danger.
"Argh!" Marlene exclaimed, slamming the flat of her palm against the tile in frustration.
How? How?
And then it hit her.
Pumpkin pasties.
Her dream-self had told Sirius she was allergic to pumpkins. As far as she knew, she had not consumed any pumpkin since waking up in the hospital, so there way no way for her to know if she was allergic to them or not. She would go to the market, but a pumpkin, eat it and... well if she got sick, it was true. And if she didn't...
Then she was losing her mind.
.
"Yes, yes! Fiona, don't worry," Marlene assured her hostess as she struggled to pull on her trainers and don her jacket at the same time. "I feel fine!"
"Marlene, what has got you so worked up?" Fiona was anxiously watching Marlene dart back and forth trying to get her things together.
"Nothing! Nothing at all!" Marlene grinned manically as she strapped the baby carrier to her front. "Here, Addie and I are just going to go on a little adventure."
She picked her daughter up from where she had been playing on the floor, secured her in the carrier, waved goodbye to Fiona's stunned face, and rushed out the door.
Once outside, the cool spring air felt like a slap in the face, and suddenly she was paralyzed with fear. What if it didn't work? Was she prepared to accept that she was losing her sanity to wherever she had lost her memories? What would happen if she told Fiona? Would they take Addie away from her? Lock her up somewhere?
No, no, she told herself. It would work. She just had to be confident. She was a Gryffindor, it was time to act like one. So with her shoulders as straight as they could be under the weight of Addie's carrier, she marched into the market. It was the same market that she worked at, so she knew all of the employees by name.
"Timmy!" she called the spotty teenager who was stocking produce.
"Oh, hi Marlene!" He grinned at her boyishly. "Are you feeling better? Heard you were a little under the weather."
"Oh yes, I'm feeling much better," Marlene assured him. "I was actually wondering if you could help me."
He straightened up considerably, looking as if he felt much more important than he did seconds before.
"Of course, what's up?"
"I need a pumpkin."
"A pumpkin?" Timmy looked at her oddly. "Marlene, it's May. We don't have any pumpkins stocked."
"Oh," Marlene's face fell. How stupid of her. Of course they didn't have pumpkins.
"But, but we have canned pumpkin?" Timmy said hopefully. "Is that ok?"
"Yes!" Marlene grasped his arm excitedly and he flushed. "Yes that's perfect! Where is it?"
"Aisle f-four, I think," the teen stammered out, directing her to the other side of the store.
"Wonderful. Thank you!" And she rushed off in the direction he had indicated.
When Marlene returned, she deposited Addie in her playpen area, and took her precious can of pumpkin into the kitchen. Fiona was seated at the small table, watching the young woman bustle about in pursuit of a can opener.
"Having a craving, are we?" Fiona asked in a mildly sardonic tone.
"Um, yeah," Marlene said lamely. She had no desire to explain to Fiona what she was up to. "I just realized I haven't eaten it since...I lost my memories," her lie sounded terribly suspicious to her own ears.
"Uh huh," Fiona made a scoffing noise, but turned back to the book she had been immersed in when Marlene returned.
Marlene, having successfully opened the can and retrieved a spoon, looked down at the orange, room temperature mush with resignation. She debated heating it first, but had to concede that she was far too anxious to wait.
But what if it didn't work? What if she was fine? Did she really want to end up proving that she was only losing her mind? Perhaps it would be better to just-
No, she scolded herself. She was no coward.
"Better hope I'm not allergic," Marlene joked awkwardly to Fiona, and took a big bite.
.
Forty minutes later found Marlene with her head in the toilet bowl, emptying her stomach. Fiona rubbed her back with a worried expression, and Marlene had to duck her head to hide her smile.
It worked.
She wasn't crazy.
They weren't dreams. They were memories.
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A/N: Boom. Second chapter. Nice and long, lots of memories, lots of Sirius, Lucas Avery gets his skull bashed in... If any of those things made you happy, drop me a review and tell me what you thought!
Till next time,
xx thebluefeather