Chapter Twenty Six

"Mitchie, you need to go shopping," My mom told me, looking at the clothes that I'd worn to school. I sighed audibly, like I didn't already know that. "I still have the money you saved from your first month of work whilst you were grounded so you can use that, there's four weeks of pay there so there's a good four hundred bucks; that should be plenty to sort your maternity clothes out for the next few months until you give birth. Just remember that your second trimester is coming to a close so buy mostly clothes intended for your third, the store assistant should be able to help you. When's Alex due home?" She asked, referring to the detention that Alex had received after only having been back for a day for doing God knows what.

"I don't know, around four thirty I think. Why?" I asked obliviously.

"Well don't you want to take her with you?"

"Aren't you coming?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. I rubbed my stomach gently as it felt like the baby was actually squeezing my bladder.

"No, I'm going out with some work friends tonight so I won't be home until later."

"Ooh, out late on a school night, Mom? Anyone would think that you were turning into me." I joked with her; apparently it was a bad move as she stopped marking her papers and looked at me disappointedly. "Sorry, I didn't mean that." I quickly apologised, feeling bad for upsetting her.

"Whatever, Mitchie, yes, we're going for a few drinks but I, of course, am being the designated driver. So, are you going to take Alex?" She asked again, clearly noticing my ignoring of her question.

"Are you insane? Taking Alex clothes shopping is like her version of torture, I wouldn't do that to her. She has terrible taste anyway when it comes to feminine clothes. She looks great in her guy clothes but that's where the line is drawn. If it wasn't for Beth going with her for my birthday presents, I'm sure she would have bought me a pineapple shaped dress or something." I told her, half-jokingly. "I'll probably just ask Beth to come." I finished.

"Yeah, I have noticed that she wears a lot of guys' clothes." She said with a soft chuckle, going back to grading the papers and tutting at one.

"Are you kidding? That's all she wears! Like, seriously, the only time she wears girls' clothes is when she's at school and she's forced to wear a skirt. Even then she complains, like, every day." I told my mom who was incredibly fortunate that she didn't have to listen to Alex's constant rants about why the girls at school should have a choice between pants and a skirt. As annoying as they were, they were so adorable. Especially the look on her face whenever I would finish her sentences for her, implying that I had heard the rant a billion times.

"I've heard it a few times. Anyway, I should be back at around midnight tonight, maybe just after. Could you do me a favour and get yourself some sensible shoes for whilst you're pregnant? I know that heels are what you feel the most comfortable in but they're not really very safe, as we've established from when you were running in the halls."

"What? Are you kidding me right now? I'll be, like, five foot nothing, Mom!" I yelled at her, kind of shocked that she even suggested it. The look on her face said that she really wasn't kidding and I groaned. "You know, I'm really starting to wonder why I'm having this baby. All it seems to do is make me gross. I eat disgusting food now, drink milk," I began to list, throwing a grimace in there for emphasis and earning a hearty laugh from my mom. "I'm fat now, only to be getting bigger, I can't wear heels, I actually went out in something that wasn't a skirt or dress today, and I burped really loud earlier today because I had gas." I told my mom with a blush that found its way onto my cheeks as I mentioned the burping incident that had previously caused everyone that wasn't already gawking at me to stare.

"You're doing this because you're a good person and you don't agree with abortion. You're expecting a baby, Mitch, you can't seriously have thought that you were going to stay as a size two for the next year." She told me in a 'duh' tone-of-voice. I glared at her menacingly because she was actually speaking as if I was dumb, which I'd proved I wasn't when I won the scholarship to the girls' school. At least if I'd have stayed there I wouldn't have ended up pregnant at eighteen as a rape victim.

Victim. The word made me sound as pathetic as I felt whilst he was doing it. It made me feel weak and dainty, like the slightest thing could break me. I hated referring to myself as a victim, especially a victim of rape.

"Ooh, that's cute," Beth exclaimed in a high-pitched, girly tone of voice as she walked directly over to a knee-length, navy blue and studded skirt. I picked it up and viewed it, knowing that it would be the right kind because we were in a store that sold clothes with very elasticated waistbands, so they would basically grow with the baby and fit me for the duration of my pregnancy. Usually I wouldn't be seen dead in a skirt that came to below my mid-thigh; the slut in me had to make an appearance at some point. However, Beth was right and the skirt was incredibly cute. I decided that I could just wear it around my stomach to make it shorter since it was elasticated throughout. "I can't believe your mom made you buy flats." She added as she glared at the bag containing three pairs of shoes.

"I didn't, I bought smaller heels. I figured she'll deal with it, it's a compromise." I explained with a smirk as I searched for the skirt in my size. Apparently I was still a size two; maternity clothes were just made differently to fit.

After a good two hours in the large mother-to-be store, Beth and I were at the front desk as the elderly lady was putting my newly purchased items into a bag. Out of the four hundred bucks that I had saved I only had fifty left so Beth and I decided to go and get something to eat since I felt like the baby was literally eating my stomach.

As I handed the woman the money to pay for my new clothes she made an obvious attempt to avoid making actual skin contact with me then pulled a disgusted face as her eyes landed on my obviously-pregnant stomach. "Can I help you with something?" I asked her rhetorically as she made no attempt to hide her disgust at the concept of a pregnant teenager purchasing things in her store.

"I just can't help but wonder why you're doing this to a child; you're clearly too young and you'll never be able to give the child a decent life with no college degree and probably no completed high school education." She snidely commented, clearly she didn't care that she had actually offended me by staring so much and adding in her incredibly wrong comment.

"Excuse me?" I asked, giving her the chance to retract her question and change it to something more customer-appropriate.

"I just think you're too young to be taking on a baby. Children shouldn't be having children. You should have made your boyfriend wear protection because where is he now? Failing that you should have had the decency to get an abortion, for your sake and the baby's." She commented uncaringly. I literally could not believe this woman's attitude toward me. At the very least she should keep her opinions to herself, especially in her workplace where she probably dealt with teenagers like me on at least a weekly-basis.

That was enough for me to blow my final straw at her. I was getting sick of people staring at my stomach and judging me when they didn't know the full story. Sure, people stopped making digs at me during the school day after I announced that I was raped but that didn't stop people doing it behind my back all day. "My 'boyfriend' is actually now waiting to be sentenced for rape, made worse by that fact that he was in a position of trust as my teacher. If he hadn't have been twice the size of me and if I hadn't have been terrified for my own life then yes, maybe I would have taken a few seconds to ask him to use protection but unfortunately I was being knocked around and forced to do things that I never in a million years wanted to do." I told her bitterly, throwing air quotes around the word 'boyfriend.' "And just to clarify, he wasn't really my boyfriend and I am still going to graduate high school, probably as valedictorian, actually, the first female one of our school. Then I'm going to NYU on a scholarship with my partner who has compassionately agreed to take this baby on because my partner loves me. I'm going to give this baby everything I can despite who her father is. I don't need opinions like that from people like you who don't know the full story behind my rape-induced pregnancy." I added angrily as Beth's mouth hung open in pure shock at my words. The woman looked shocked and horrified, I couldn't tell whether it was from her own words of judgement or my outburst but she looked completely numb.

I didn't want to stay in the place so I grabbed my bags and stalked out of the store, only to be called back by Beth who hadn't moved.

"Whoa no! Mitch, get back here!" She called to me. I turned around and walked lazily back to her, the extra weight of several shopping bags and three pairs of shoes was not something I appreciated with my already aching back. "I want to speak to your manager." She told the woman once I'd reoccupied my position in front of the check-out desk.

"She's not in." The woman spat. It was quite obvious that Beth wanted to complain about her.

"Then I want a contact number for her and don't even think about telling me you don't have one because I know you do." It took a few minutes but the woman eventually wrote down a number on a slip of paper and reluctantly handed it to Beth. "I'll also need your name and employee number. Oh, and an apology to my friend who has already put up with so much. She did not deserve that and she should not have had to explain her private story to you." She told her firmly, quickly resembling her mother who I'd only met once. She was incredibly professional and scary but I personally wouldn't expect anything less from a hotshot lawyer. In that moment it became obvious that they were definitely related.

"I'm very sorry, dear. If I'd have had any idea I would never have said anything, you have every ounce of my sympathy. I was wrong to judge you." She apologised sincerely and I almost wanted to forgive her. After all, if I'd have seen someone my age that was pregnant I would probably have judged them too and assumed they were a slut. I'd done it before, after all. I openly admit that I used to be a bit of a slut and I dress like one but when I slept with guys before I was always smart enough to make him wrap it.

"Thank you for that, I suppose. I'll be in touch with your manager right away."

An hour later found us in McDonalds enjoying much needed food. Apparently the baby was very grateful for it as every time I swallowed something I felt butterflies in my stomach. "Sam's on her way from work, do you mind?" Beth asked as she stood up, obviously going to get some food for her girlfriend.

"Of course not. Does she know about this?" I asked with my mouth full as I pointed to my protruding stomach.

"Not yet, no."

"Okay. Ooh, Beth! Whilst you're there can you get me some more fries?" I asked her hopefully, digging a couple of dollars from my pocket and offering it to her. She looked at it sceptically and raised her eyebrows at me, taking it nonetheless.

"You've already had two portions and a burger, Mitch!" She exclaimed in shock.

"I don't care, the baby is damn hungry." I shot back quickly, not willing to elaborate any more on my increased cravings and needs for more food. "Ooh, and barbeque sauce!" I added as she joined the queue, leaving me and the baby to finish the last few fries in my box.

I smiled sadly as I rested my hand on my stomach. I kind of felt like it was time for the baby and I to bond. I knew that she could hear things and recognise my voice so I figured why not talk to her? "Do you see what sort of shit I'm putting up with for you? I hope you don't come out as a little bitch. You'd better make it all worth it." I joked with her quietly. I completely blanked all of the noise surrounding me and focused only on my first words directed toward my baby girl. "But seriously, baby, I'm really excited to meet you," I admitted. "I'm terrified, don't get me wrong. But I think that we'll be okay. Alex will make sure of it and I will always do everything I can to protect you and make sure you have the best life possible. Oh, baby, you have no idea how loved you'll be. I'm sorry that you won't have a daddy to grow up with but trust me, you wouldn't want him anyway. Maybe someday I'll tell you about him and what he did to me but not until you're a lot older. I won't wait as long as Nanny Sonny did though; I hated not knowing about my father." I told her quietly. I felt my eyes tearing up as I spoke to my little girl for the first time. I didn't really believe Doctor Stevens and I was certain that she couldn't really hear me but it was worth a shot anyway.

"You won't have a daddy and you won't have a granddad, I'm so sorry about that, baby, but there's nothing I can do to change that. You wouldn't want them in your life anyway, I'm sure of it. You'll have Alex, anyway, and between you and me she's basically a guy anyway. But she's so not a guy in so many perfect ways. Don't tell her I said that, she'll go crazy." I chuckled softly at my own words and the thought of Alex's face if she ever found out that I basically think she should have been born a guy. I was more than glad that she wasn't, though. "Alex will be your daddy and she'll be your guy influence in your life. You'll also have your Uncle Max, but don't ever take any advice from him. I haven't met your Uncle Justin but he doesn't sound like a great guy. You might have a Nanny Theresa, too. Maybe even a Granddad Jerry if he changes his mind." I finished before taking a deep breath and getting to the part that I was dreading telling my little girl.

"Now to the thing that I wish I could prevent but I know that I can't… When you get to school, the other kids might make fun of you. I don't know how times will change in five years but anyway, you'll be the little girl with a teenage mother who has a girlfriend. Maybe even a wife by then. You'll have two mommies of a female daddy and the kids at school might not understand that. But baby girl, if you ever receive any trouble from other kids because of your mommies, you just come straight to us and we will sort it. No one will ever get away with making you cry, sweetheart. Alex and I will always make sure of that." I whispered the final words then kissed my index and middle finger before placing them softly on my stomach. I was feeling emotional about my first half-conversation with my daughter. My first time speaking to her and I was already apologising for so much that was honestly beyond my control.

"Don't ever apologise for who you are, Mitch," I jumped slightly at the sound of someone talking to me and turned around to find Beth standing behind me holding out my fries.

"Jesus, Beth, you scared me." I told her as I felt my heart pounding in my chest. Beth smiled softly and took her seat next to me after pulling up and extra chair for Sam when she arrived. A soft hand was placed on my cotton-clad shoulder and it was then that I realised I was still wearing sweats and a ratty t-shirt.

"Seriously, Mitch, don't apologise. She'll love you unconditionally because you're her mom. Your love for her is so obvious that it's actually making me feel a little emotional; I know that I speak for everyone that's stayed by your side when I say that I can't wait to meet her. You'll be a great mom, you're going to be quite the milf." She said with a small laugh which caused me to begin laughing as well. I absolutely loved this girl. Obviously not in the same way as I loved Alex but I was so thankful to have a friend like her in my life.

"Thanks," I replied through my laughter as I pulled her into a tight hug.

"Hey girls, we getting it on?" Sam's voice sounded through a concealed chuckle, pulling us from our hug. I smiled warmly at the girl that made my best friend so happy and patted the empty seat for her. "Oh, God, you got me a Big Mac! I think I just fell a little bit more in love with you!" She exclaimed happily as she took her seat and quickly pecked Beth's lips.

"Wait, love?" I asked curiously.

"Yeah, we kinda admitted it to each other last night. I'd have told you but your news was kinda bigger." Beth admitted whilst brushing a strand of her newly-purple, short hair from her face and leaving it to reside behind her ear.

"What news?" Sam asked with her mouth full. I laughed as she spat a tiny amount of burger across the table then covered her mouth in embarrassment. She looked between Beth and I impatiently, waiting for one of us to tell her.

"Can I tell her? Please let me tell her, I'm so excited!"

I nodded in agreement and Beth grinned, turning to face Sam fully and taking her unoccupied hand in her own. "Baby, I'm going to be a godmother. Mitchie's pregnant." She explained happily, the excitement evident in her words and tone of voice. I smiled slightly at how excited she was and nodded to show to Sam that it wasn't some kind of joke.

"For real?" She asked as I continued to nod. "Holy shit! What happened to Alex?" She asked unexpectedly.

"I'll explain that all to you later, Sammie, I don't think Mitchie really wants to talk about it again." She said kindly as she stole a fry from Sam's meal.

"Well you'd better do it quickly because we got some new stock in at work today and I've got us a few new things to try out." She replied with a quick wink and a lick of her salty lips. I fought the urge to laugh about how open they were about their sex life but that didn't stop my mind wondering about what she'd got in the Angels bag that I'd only just noticed.

"It'll only take a couple of minutes, baby, don't you worry. We'll have plenty of time, we both know that I can go all night and still be up for school in the morning." She replied before pressing her lips tightly to Sam's, disregarding the food that was probably still in her mouth. They were a cute couple but they were still kind of gross.

"And on that note, I'm going to go and change my fat ass out of these sweats and into some of my better-fitting clothes." I announced to excuse myself from the awkward situation. I knew that I looked ridiculous in sweats and a t-shirt that were too small and a pair of five inch heels but I refused to be five foot nothing. People were staring at me anyway because of my obvious bump at such a young age so the shoes were probably the last things on their minds.

After five minutes I had changed into a ruby red pencil skirt and black tank top that had glitter writing reading 'hands off the bump' and a pair of hands printed across my protruding stomach.

For the first time since getting fat I actually felt reasonably comfortable again, despite the burning ache in my back from carrying the extra weight around all day.