Chapter 3

Once again whitem stood in front of the backstage mirror. This time though, he wasn't checking out his suit, or how good he looked without a tie.

His breathing had what could only be described as a 'mechanical echo' to it as he looked on with an imposing stance. He took another deep breath letting it echo in his ears, and marveled at how the ensemble he was now wearing looked.

Just as he was about to say a famous line from an equally famous movie, he was interrupted by a voice off to one side. "whitem… what in the world are you doing?"

Caught somewhat by surprise, he spun around making the black cape over his shoulders flare out dramatically just below his knees. The quick look of surprise on his face wasn't noticed as the black helmet of a famous villain hid his features. whitem's surprise was covered well by his quickly improvised line.

"How dare you interrupt my solitude!" His breath once again echoed loudly. "I… Darth whitem, demand obedience!" His right hand then rose and the fingers contorted inside their black glove, looking like he was trying to choke something, but he was a good four feet from Slipgate.

whitem's co-host immediately looked like he was choking. "I… I can't… please…" Then Slipgate intentionally slumped into the wall hard enough that he had to catch himself with his hands before sliding down further. Righting himself, he then looked the costume over. "Why are you wearing a Darth Vader costume?"

whitem lifted the black helmet off of his head and made a "patissssh" sound like escaping air. "Since Disney now owns this franchise as well, I thought I would wear this for the next award."

It only took a moment for Slipgate to realize the next award was for 'Best Villain,' and for a micro-second he actually thought this would be a good idea. But then reason took over. "Umm… No. I mean, it would be a bit of fun, but I could barely hear you and I was standing just a few feet away. The microphone on stage isn't that sensitive, and all you would sound like is a bad speaker at a fast-food drive-through."

"Ahh…" whitem said with a smile and turned the helmet over, pointing inside. "I integrated a wireless mic inside and tied it in to my J.A.R.V.I.S. II, which then connects me to the house speaker system. There would only be about a second lag between what I actually say and when it comes out of the speakers."

Before whitem could say anything more, he realized something… "And, uh, the wireless mic… was active." Recognition crossed both hosts' faces and they ran to peek out at the audience from the edge of the curtain. The audience was smirking or smiling, clearly having heard everything from from whitem's soliloquy through both of the Host's discussion.

The two MCs scurried back to the table where the helmet was left, and whitem flipped the mic off. "Do you still want to wear it given that the surprise is over?" Slipgate asked.

"Pleeease?"

"We didn't plan for this… Besides… we've already got a somewhat 'Iron Man' theme going on here, so wouldn't it be kinda weird to suddenly throw in a Star Wars reference?"

"Fine. Just trying to put a little more fun into the… Fannies." He smirked a little at the sentence he just uttered.

"I still can't believe that name has stayed the same for the last nine years." Slipgate said and shook his head.

"It is what it is at this point. Anyway, wouldn't it be kind of fun for at least one of us to be dressed as such a famous villain? You can do something out there too!" whitem said.

Slipgate paused, considering. Then he whipped out pointed ears and put them on while looking in the mirror. He had facial hair going already, and combined with his almost bowl-like haircut and blue dress shirt, it was basically a perfect suited Mirror Spock.

whitem was open-mouthed at first, and then grinned.

Once again a stagehand mysteriously appeared and counted down the last few seconds before the hosts were to walk on to stage. The two walked back out just as another AC/DC song was finishing.

Slipgate started this portion of the show after a polite applause. "Ladies and gentlemen, Heroes and Villains. We're back for more fun and more awards. My co-host here wanted to try something a bit unconventional for the next award, and I decided, why not?

"Villains are an important aspect of many stories. It's the yang to the yin, the bad to the good, the evil to the… well, you get the point. Our next award is for Best Villain. whitem… do you have the envelopes for the next awards?"

His co-host nodded and handed the first one to Slipgate, who opened it. "The winner for Best Villain is… Austin Young, from the story 'Turning Lemons into Lemonade' by Imyoshi!"

The winning author immediately came up on stage and walked up to the podium, stopping for a moment when he came to whitem, who handed him the golden statuette of Rufus.

After a small adjustment to the microphone, he spoke. "So apparently you readers love my Austin Young character? Really? Well then I'm glad I was able to create an OC without it blowing up in my face into a million bite size pieces. That's somewhat of a relief. Gary Sue avoided - Mission Complete. And all it took to make the guy likable was a few, but important, personality choices. The biggest and most important was him being a personal mirror image of my childhood hero, Austin Powers. So everyone if you would give Austin Powers a round of applause! He deserves it!"

There was a slight pause of confusion on the part of the audience, as they weren't entirely sure if they would be applauding the winning author, or a character used for inspiration for an original character. Either way, praise was given by the sounds of clapping and even a few hoots and hollers. The applause continued as Imyoshi left the stage with his statuette.

whitem was next to step up to the podium, this time without his Vader costume. "I'd sing for y'all right now, but I don't do very good 'a capella.'" His small attempt at a joke was met with stony silence. "Anyway… our next award is for Best Songfic."

Pulling another envelope from his pocket, the host opened it. His eyes went wide after reading the winner, and then impossibly wider as he read more. "Ladies and gentlemen, this … this is amazing. I don't believe this has happened before in the history of the Fannies, but we have a tie… but the tie is for one person! The winning stories are 'I'll be Home for Christmas,' and 'Say Something'… both written by temporaryinsanity91!"

The stunning author strode across the stage and graciously received her statuette of the golden Rufus from Slipgate. She then approached the podium, adjusted the microphone a bit and spoke.

"Ahem." She cleared her throat and looked around, smoothing down the front of a shiny, purple dress. "Well, I'm usually more talkative in my author's notes, so I'm just going to say this. Thanks for voting and being a part of the Fannies. It means a lot to everyone that got nominated and... Right... uhhh, thanks again."

With that said, temporayinstanity91 turned and left the stage, leaving the hosts to look after her. "Well that was a quick acceptance speech." whitem commented, and both turned back to the podium.

Slipgate moved up to the microphone next. "Alternate universes are fun to write, but they can also be a pain. They show what could happen if one small decision or action was different than what we see on the show. The hard part can be showing how a known character would act towards a completely different situation.

"If you haven't guessed yet, the next award is for Best AU, or Alternate Universe. The envelope please?" He held out a hand and whitem handed him the next winner. After opening and reading the winner, he gave a small chuckle. "The winner is the same person who was just here… temporaryinsanity91! The winning story is 'Number Twenty Three'!"

The young woman who was on stage just a few moments ago was once again walking across the stage. She received her second statuette of Rufus, and now she held each one in a hand. Apparently temporaryinsanity91 didn't want to leave her other award with anyone else.

She walked up behind the podium and spoke in to the microphone. It hadn't even been adjusted from the last time she was up on stage. "Err-hey again, guys. Thank you for this. I'm very excited to have won this award. It really means the world to me. Thanks to my beta/editor/right hand Levi2000a1, and to everyone that has helped with ideas. Again, special thanks to everyone that participated… And, you guys rock! There will be more for this story and others soon."

Just as the author turned to walk off the stage, one of the heels of her stilettos snagged a part of her long dress, and she started to tumble. The entire audience took a collective deep breath, and Slipgate and whitem both started to move to catch her, but somehow, while still holding on to each of her statuettes, tempraryinsanity91 did a shoulder roll and landed upright in a wobbly, but yet stable stance. She looked out over the audience and gave a sheepish smile, which was followed by laughter, and loud applause. She then walked the rest of the way off the stage, albeit at a slower and more careful pace.

"I guess you would call that grace under pressure?" whitem suggested, and all Slipgate could do was nod, thoroughly impressed with how she had recovered.

"A little bit of Jennifer Lawrence there," Slipgate said, nodding.

Leaning in to the microphone, whitem ended the segment. "Well folks, I hope you're enjoying the show so far. We still have a few more awards to go, so if you would like, go ahead and get another snack or drink, and we'll be back."

Another AC/DC song, this time "Rock and Roll aint Noise Pollution", played over the speakers as the two hosts walked off the stage. This time, the large screen at the back of the stage that had been looking like a brick wall, lit up and started an impressive light show to the beat of the song.

To be continued…