Looking For Something: Chapter 2
Santana hadn't heard back from Marley for a week, but what was she expecting? The Latina didn't know why she had a sudden interest in this girl, but she would get over it soon enough. For fuck's sake, she was just a normal sophomore who she knew nothing about.
Mike Chang was back in town for the weekend, and he was going to be throwing a huge party tonight. Anyone who was anyone in Lima would be invited. Santana was actually pretty excited to go. She needed a night to just get drunk, dance, and forget about the world. Of course Brittany and Sam would be there, but Santana would just do her best to avoid them. The Latina was still completely in love with the blonde cheerio, that she knew for sure. She also knew that Brittany was still in love with her too, but things don't always work out the way you want them to. Santana had tried to do the right thing by breaking up with her to avoid any further heartbreak, but she was now regretting that decision. She missed Brittany, and it wasn't just about the sex. She missed having her as a best friend; someone she could always talk to. The Latina knew that the blonde would be more than happy to accept her back into her life, but Santana just wasn't ready for that. So as she made her way into Mike's super huge house, Santana scurried right past the crowd of people, into the kitchen. She smiled once she saw familiar, comforting faces; Finn, Puck, Mercedes, and Rachel (she actually did miss the girl and her annoying self).
"Girl! I've been waiting to see your hot ass face again." Mercedes squealed as she came to hug the Latina. Santana laughed.
"Missed you too, Cedes." Santana smiled at the rest of the group, and then glared at Puck. "How come you didn't tell me you were still in town, douche face? You owe me like 5 smoke seshes." Puck held up his hands in defense.
"To be honest, I didn't know you were still in town either." Puck handed Santana a drink. "Here. You seem like you really need this. I'm gonna find Mike and tell him to fix the music. This shit is horrible." Santana just rolled her eyes, and took a sip of the drink. Strong, but she liked it that way.
"So, Santana. How is college life treating you?" Rachel asked with a beaming smile.
"You know what, let's not talk about that right now. I needs to get my drink on." Santana went to fill up her glass with more vodka, and then walked out of the kitchen, into the living room. She saw a few more familiar faces. Sam was with Mike and Puck, and thankfully, Brittany wasn't with him. On the couch were some of the newer Cheerios, including Kitty, who Santana had taken an instant disliking too. And then in the corner were Unique, Tina, Brittany, and to Santana's surprise, Marley. The Latina was about to turn around around and go in the other direction, but of all people, Brittany's voice stopped her.
"San!" Brittany screamed out with a huge smile. Santana took a huge breath, and then walked towards the group.
"Britt.." Santana said softly. "Hi." She finally smiled. She could do this. Marley briefly smiled at her, and she returned it. Tina had taken Unique along with her to the kitchen. Wow, how wonderful. "Hey, Marley." Of course Santana would acknowledge the younger girl as well.
"Hi Santana." She smiled again.
"This is so cool. We're all friends!" Brittany squealed. Santana cringed at the term. Friends.
"Where's Sam?" Santana blurted out.
"Oh, you just reminded me! I have to go find him." Brittany gave her a quick hug, and then went off. Santana sighed. Of course.
"Are you okay?" Marley asked hesitantly.
"Yeah, fine." Santana answered coldly. They stood there in silence for a few moments.
"You know, you didn't have to leave me a note. You could've just stayed." The young girl said quietly. "But that was really nice of you. My mom was happy." Santana now smiled softly.
"I felt kind of creepy." The Latina mumbled. Marley laughed.
"No one's ever done anything like that for me before."
"It was just ice cream, Marley. No big deal." Santana said. Marley just nodded. "Where's your drink?" The Latina noticed that the younger girl didn't have a cup.
"Oh. I don't drink." Marley stated embarrassingly. "I just came here with Unique."
"Boo. That's no fun. She's not even here hanging out with you." Santana observed. Marley just shrugged.
"It's whatever. I don't mind." Santana just shook her head.
"You should, though. I know it's not my place. I mean, we barely know each other. But just.." The Latina sighed. She was sort of drunk. "Don't let people walk all over you, okay?" Marley just stared at her with her big, innocent eyes and nodded.
"Okay."
"Good." Santana smiled. "So this is officially the worst party I've been to." Marley just laughed. "You seem really bored too. Do you want me to take you home?" The Latina blurted out. God, what was wrong with her tonight?
"But I came with Unique..." the younger girl frowned.
"Honey, she'll fend for herself. I say we just leave." Santana smirked. Marley just blushed and nodded. The Latina led the other girl out of the crowded house, and to her car. Once they were both buckled in, Marley hesitated.
"Wait. You've been drinking." The younger girl stated. Santana just lifted her brow in question.
"And?"
"You can't drive like that, and I don't even know how to drive." Santana laughed.
"Then how do you expect us to get anywhere?" Marley fumbled with her hands.
"We could walk." Santana was about to question the girl even further, but couldn't figure out what to say. Fuck it.
"Okay. Let's walk then. I'll just text Mike to drop off my car." Santana had no idea why she gave in so easily. Must've been the alcohol. But Marley's bright smile reminded her why.
The two girls walked in a peaceful silence for ten minutes. The Latina honestly had no clue where they were going.
"Why are you so nice to me?" Marley suddenly asked in her calm voice. Santana took a few seconds to think of a response.
"I don't know." She shrugged. "I mean, you don't annoy me. To be honest, I think you're cool Marley. You're easy to talk to." The older girl was being really honest. Marley seemed surprised with the confession.
"I-I guess I'm not used to people actually liking me." The younger girl shrugged. "I didn't speak up a few weeks ago, but Kitty and I...we're not exactly friends. Actually, she does anything she can to torture me." Marley admitted.
"Fucking bitch. I knew I didn't like her." Santana shook her head.
"She's calmed down a bit since she joined glee club. She thinks I'm out to steal her boyfriend." The Latina just nodded.
"Her boyfriend seems to like you, though. At least, from what I saw that day." Santana said. Marley sighed.
"I don't know. I'm just confused. He's nice, but why would he be with someone as horrible as Kitty?"
"People do things for different reasons." Santana shrugged. "I still can't believe she chose Sam." she mumbled.
"Huh? Are you talking about Brittany?" Marley was clearly confused.
"Yeah." Santana sighed. "Brittany and I, well, our history is complicated. Long story short, we dated for a while, but things didn't really work out and now she's with Sam." Marley was surprised. She didn't even know Santana liked girls. This suddenly struck her interest.
"Oh. Wow." The younger girl nodded. "Okay. Yeah. That sucks. I'm really sorry to hear that Santana." Marley said sincerely. She was bad at comforting anyone besides her mom. Maybe that had to do with the fact that she's never been given a chance.
"It's okay." she laughed. "I'll get over it."
"If you need anyone to talk to, I'm here." Marley said, offering a genuine smile. The Latina just nodded and returned it.
"You do know where we're going, right?" Santana suddenly asked.
"Yeah. I actually think we're a few houses away." Marley stopped. "I can walk the rest of the way. Thanks for walking with me." She smiled.
"You sure?" Santana asked with concern, but she wouldn't push the girl. Marley just nodded reassuringly. "Well, alright." The Latina fumbled with her hands. Now she was the one who didn't know what to say. This never happened. "Can I get your number? You know, just to keep in touch." She asked hesitantly. Marley frowned and looked down.
"Uh, I actually don't have a phone." She admitted with embarrassment.
"Oh.. That's alright."
"But I can give you my home number?" Marley hoped that would be okay. She was relieved when Santana smiled.
"That sounds good." After they exchanged numbers, Santana felt brave and went to hug the girl for a quick second. Marley was awkward about it, but that made the older girl smile more for some reason. "I'll see you around Marley." The younger girl nodded and smiled back as she pulled away. She then went off towards her house.
The Latina sighed loudly and sat on the sidewalk. What was she doing with her life? She knew she needed to get herself out there, but she didn't know where to begin. Santana needed to find her dream. Everyone had dreams, and almost everyone of her friends were out there working to live them. Even Quinn of all people. She knew she would find hers someday; at least she hoped, but that day wouldn't be anytime soon.
X.
Santana took a long drag from Puck's bong. It was a lazy sunday, and her and Puck were finally having their long awaited smoke sesh. If the Latina were being honest, she very much enjoyed getting high with a few people rather than getting drunk at a party. Things were so much simpler and at ease.
"So I dropped out of college today." Santana said after exhaling some smoke. Puck just raised his eyebrows. That's the thing she loved about the guy: no matter what she says or does, Puck never overreacts.
"Huh, I guess that's not a surprise." He mumbled. "Man, I never thought college was for you. Maybe for people like Quinn and Mike, but not you." Santana was a little hurt by that.
"What's that supposed to mean?" She crossed her arms. Puck just chuckled.
"It's not a bad thing, San. It just means you're destined for other things. I'm sure you know that too." Santana took a second to think about that. It was sort of true, and Puck was one of the only people who knew her that well. And Brittany, but she wasn't going to think about that.
"What am I supposed to do now?" She sighed. Puck just shrugged.
"Just lay low for a while. Chill. You don't have to have it all figured out right now. You're not Rachel." He laughed. That got the Latina to laugh as well.
"That's what I've been doing. I just feel so incomplete, you know?" Puck nodded. He could definitely relate to that, but he wouldn't admit it. Santana decided that was enough deep talk for the day.
After another hour of smoking with Puck, Santana was high as hell. It felt nice though, especially since she hadn't smoked in a while. As she was walking down the neighborhood towards her house, she came to a stop. An idea had just popped into the Latina's mind, and before she could even reconsider what she was doing, she dialed the number. After a few seconds, the person picked up.
"Hello?" said a groggy voice.
"I talk, you listen." Santana said quickly. "I need you to do me a favor. Tomorrow I'm going to be visiting your class. No questions asked. Just make sure everyone's there." Santana had no idea what she was planning on doing. She really wasn't in the right state of mind.
"Huh? Uh, okay." Finn answered, obviously confused. Santana then hung up.
The Latina felt that she needed to do or show something tomorrow. And whatever that was, she knew that her main focus in the back of her mind was on a certain brunette.