"Crazy Christmas Letters!"
Rated T
Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with the Total Drama series or any of its characters. Total Drama and it's characters are owned by FreshTV, Jennifer Pertsch and Tom McGillis. Anyway, what would happen if our favorite characters sent very odd letters to Santa Claus? Well, you get this awesome collection. Enjoy!
Chapter 3: Owen
Dear Santa,
My name's Owen! I've been a really happy big boy this year. Hard to believe I'm still really big after last year. I think it must be all the limburger cheese I ate.
Anyway, I would like 500 hot dogs, 500 hamburgers, 500 bottles of Coke, 500 rounds of toilet paper, 500 rounds of Pepto Bismol, and if you can, 50 Butterball turkeys. I'm not sure if food counts as gifts, though. But then again, everyone gives out fruitcakes for Christmas, so basically, that has to count for something, right? I love things that count to hundreds, which was why I wanted 500 of everything. Oh, can you also bring me 300 on DVD! I love that because you know what I said: I love everything that counts to hundred.
Oh, and can you send me 500 cans of air spray for Christmas as well? It seems that my farts have fumigated the entire house. I wouldn't let anyone into my house if I were you. It smells like a dead horse's ass mixed with pig poop and a roadkill skunk. So if you want, you can put the gifts outside.
Sincerely,
Owen
P.S.: Can you also send me an air tank for Noah on Christmas as well? I think by the time I wrote this, I accidentally farted near him so bad, he had to be taken to the hospital. Can you also bring him an extra lung just in case one of his lungs shuts down on him? Thanks!
Yeah, Owen doesn't seem to hold his gas for so long, huh?
Who should be next? Duncan, B or Samey?
Review or PM me for your suggestions. Until then, Happy Christmas and Merry Holidays! :D