I put the noose around my neck. It was lopped against my neck and chest. The wooden looking rope was hard and was rough, like a scratchy blanket. The thing wouldn't stop looking up at me. "Just do it. It's fine. No one will care. No one will notice. They don't like you anyways. They never liked you." The comments went on in my head.

My legs were shaking, making the chair make squeeking sounds here and there. It was simple. I end in here and forget my life. My letter was on my bed waiting for the moment they open it and read my condolences. But they won't care, they'll laugh at my dead body.

The letter should be like this, "

To my family,

I'm sorry, I couldn't take much more. Dad I love you and I hope you can get another promotion. I know how much you love that job and how much you love everyone there. Mom, even though you hate me I still love you. I always loved you but you couldn't see that under that thick wall in your eyes. I hope you see what kind of chain reaction you started. Brothers, don't be to hard on each other. Jordan thank you for your support. I love you. The rest of you, I hope you have great futures. Please don't take my loss to hard. Oh hell, you won't care. Don't have a funeral for me. Save your money, and dump me in a river with a rose. I ask for very little.

All the abuse is killing me both in and outside. I'm sorry you had to see me like this. Tell my friends that I loved them. I love you guys. But I must go for this world is cruel. Good bye."

A tear shot down my eye as I looked down. I pulled an edge of the rope to tighten it around my neck. I could feel it scratch at my neck. I looked up at the fan where the rope was attached to. "I'm sorry... So very sorry. Good bye." My leg stretched outward and the chair was blasted backward. The world slowed, I could feel my self fall. The small gust of air rushing around my legs and the adrenaline pulsing through my veins.

It was quick and painless. But hurt me so bad when it actually happened. A quick snap and I saw nothing. It was over, finally over. All that pain and abuse I went through to end up here. I regretted my decision instantly. The bright light challenged my decision. But I stayed where I was.

I heard a creek behind me. Like a door opening. Then I heard a small bag drop. Like a grocery bag. A faint scream that sounded like my mother. A deep no from somepony like my brother, Jordan. But then two other faint screams. It was my brothers. I looked behind me. It was my mother pulling my lifeless copy from the noose. Jordan crying and shaking his head. My two other brothers in a corner and then my dad in the doorway to the house. Stunned.

My mom was now holding my body. Shaking in silence, soaking in her regrets and her greatest fear. Her tears now soaked my shoulder that I used to use. I closed my eyes and looked towards the ground. I don't want to see that anymore. It's to painful to watch. I looked towards the light. Somepony was standing there now. The pony was a male, he had a white gown on and had a light brown beard.

I walk above what I think is an abyss of darkness. He only got farther away as I ran towards him. The stallion shook his head. I saw him scream something before walking into the light himself. The lit doorway quickly turned into nothing. Just more darkness that surrounded me. Drowned me out of anything that made me even think of anything. "What did you say." I sat down and sobbed.

There was no track of time for how long I was sobbing. Sobbing where ever I was. I presume a purgatory. A purgatory of where I must stay till something happens. But what will happen and when will it happen? I wouldn't know that.

"HEY!" I turned my head to look where the sound was coming. I saw nothing. Probably my mind playing tricks on me. "OVER HERE!" There that voice was again. It didn't have a distinct voice. It was just there somewhere. Just there to exist. I looked again and there was somepony running towards me. It was yet again a stallion. But I couldn't really make out much or any of his features or what he looked at.

He reached out towards me as he was still running. I was confused but I got up and reached towards him. He was right in front of me. I could almost touch... The glass. I felt cold hard glass. I was looking into a window. A different part of this world beyond this glass wasn't even looking for me. It was a projected screen. The stallion disappeared and a light traced back to a tall chair and table.

I looked up to the top and saw nothing. No one sat down on the chair. No one stopped the projector. No pony was around. I forgot that I was alone. In this chasm of never ending darkness. "Wake up."

My eyes shot open like bullets. It was a quick way of remembering I was still alive. The warmth of somepony near warmed my heart knowing again, I'm still alive.

I sat up and then the sweat from my forehead started to drip down my cheeks. It felt like tears but more bitter. I looked around, still a dark resemblance of that abyss. I couldn't see anything except where the moon light shadowed.

The dresser and door peeked out in the shadows. I could see their sharp edges seep through the darkness. The rest of their shape were engulfed by the night. No body shape, only edges of pure entitlement.

My eyes peeled off the dark and towards my still sleeping brother. His warm breath spread across some of my arm and sides. It felt decent. A nice furnace right next to you. One that could protect you from whom would want to hurt me. His brother. 1/6 of his family.

My still tense body that was sitting up. Slid down into the covers of warmth. I made no noise while sliding down, quietly and peacefully. A smile pressed on my cheeks knowing that I still have a brother. Brothers, 3, but no sister. Which I was completely fine with.

I closed my eyes, now fading into the darkness. But not a mean darkness but more of a nice soothing darkness. One you fall in and come out unharmed and untouched. It welcomed me with a dream of a meadow under the moon light.

The meadow was green and was filled with tall grass. But the grass had grown no taller than where I could see. I was accompanied by a second pony. The dream locked his face away, the only thing I could recognize is that he was a grayish color. He wore a coat over his back and the hood came over his sides, covering up anything and everything that I wanted to see.

We ran towards nowhere, we just ran through the meadow without a care. We looked at each other very often making sure that we are still together and not lost from the eyes of our lover. He was playful in most ways. He jumped and made a few laughing sounds that I couldn't hear. I can't explain why but he'll laugh and I won't hear it. I just assume he's laughing with me.

At one point we laid in the middle of the meadow and just stared at the night sky. I wondered what it would feel like to go above the outer atmosphere and fly with the stars. I told him this and he nodded each time in agreement. He rolled over on top of me. I curled up my arms to pull them closer into my chest. He took his hood off.

*pop*

"What?"

*beep beep beep*

"Sunbean please put it on sleep mode." My brother almost slapped me as he said that.

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry." I replied polite-fully. My voice was mucky, exactly how I expected it to be. Mucky, slow, and filled with hatred towards this now new morning. "What did he look like?" I pondered to myself.

"What did who?"

"Nothing."

"Alright. Whatever you say hotshot."

I pushed the heavy covers off myself. It appeared I had a little morning wood. I tried to push it aside and ignore it till it goes down. I did, I did.. For a while. At one point another one of my younger brothers were getting up and I had to rush to put on some cloths. Atleast something to cover up what I am now embarrassed about. Morning dilemmas 101: try and solve your problem as fast and as quickly as possible, and don't let anypony find out at any costs.

I followed the rules and decided to put on my underwear and pants with pain involved. Both of those pieces rid up where it shouldn't pretty far. It wasn't a very pleasant thing I wanted this morning but it had to be done. I got my jacket on and bounced from the room to the hallway with ease. Now I was a half dressed colt in the middle of the hallway.

I followed the hallways path down the corridor that splits off into living room or kitchen. The lights were still out in the kitchen. It wasn't normal for me to wear cloths except for special occasions, A.K.A. funerals, weddings, etc. I just need to get to the cabinet and drink some water. Hopefully it will go down. I'll just say if anypony asks that it's really cold and I felt like wearing something to warm up. Easy, simple, boom, pow done.

I waltzed towards the kitchen at a relatively fast pace. It was pretty simple where to find the cups, top shelfs in the center between both the plates and wine glasses. I pulled out a greenish clear cup. I turned around and basically jumped towards the fridge. I put the glass under that little light that pours out water when you press a button. It filled the cup right to the top with cool refreshing water. I needed it anyway because my throat was completely dry.

"Morning colt." A feminine voice said from around my ears.