A couple days have passed since the little monster was been born, and since my incompetent cronies came back with news of failure. Luckily the brat kept his mouth shut. If Mufasa found out that I was involved it would no doubt be the end of me. Maybe if I didn't show my loathing so blatantly he wouldn't be as quick to come to the correct conclusions1. But pretending to 'respect' Mufasa would be an act too hard to maintain for long, an intonation of sarcasm would surely give me away.
So now I stood pondering about where my place was in all the commotion. And it so happened that my place was among a throng of hyenas. Now you must be wondering what someone like myself would be doing with filthy scavengers2. Well actually, I have known Shenzi and her dynamic duo for just about as long as I can remember. Although hyenas aren't exactly the brightest of animals we somehow got along3. And being surrounded by idiots does wonders for one's self esteem!
Time went on and before long we were rather well acquainted4. Each of us had something to gain, I brought them fresh kill and they did as they were told…or tried to do as they were told. Unfortunately, I was beginning to feel that they were getting more out of this "friendship" than I was. So after much thought I worked them into the coop of the century! The murkiest scam! And most importantly, my rise to power. Of course, I made sure that my plot's execution required as little brain power on their part as possible; just strength in numbers and daring attack on Pride-rock. If that didn't work out then I always have a back-up plan5. It mainly involved scaring a couple wildebeest to stamped over my favorite nephew who I oh so very much adore.
I stood at the edge of the escarpment looking over inhabitants of the elephant graveyard. Most of the hyenas were huddled together for the night in peaceful slumber, with the exception of a certain trio who, as always, awaited my arrival.
"So Scar, what did you bring us this time? No wait, let me guess! Is it a…a…zebra?" Banzi addressed me in his usual eager manner, yet I couldn't hide my discontent for the little respect they all had for me6. Then again, what could I expect from a scavenger, giddy with excitement for a piece of meat.
"Oh you think I brought you something to eat eh?"
Ed bobbed his head in reply, his face bearing the most unreadable of expressions,7 while his tongue lolled from his mouth.
"Then I'm afraid we have both been disappointed. You see, I'm tired of giving away freebies while you cannot even carryout the simplest of tasks," I explained. "Now is the time for you to settle your debt."
"Huh? Can we have some meat or what?"
"What if you do me a little favor first and then maybe I'll consider it. How does that sound?"
"Nah, I think I'll just have the meat," remarked Banzi.
"Well I don't pay you to think do I?" I said calmly.
"Don't worry, it's no extra charge," I turned to see Shenzi stepping towards me. I assumed that she scampered up the high ridge while I was distracted with the other fool.
"Oh c'mon guys, stop kidding around, I'm getting hungry! And why do you want to get rid of this Simba so bad, huh Scar? Can't you just be king next time or something?" Banzi hollered from below.
"Next time? You idiot! Once he takes the throne his children would follow, and then his children's children, and so would be the start of an era of hopeless undeserving rulers! While I will simply be "uncle Scar" to little gremlins for eternity! I deserve to be king! If Mufasa was – "
"Yeah, yeah. So what's the big idea this time?
"I won't waste my breath now, my latest scheme shall be heard by the entire pack! Although I could get you three to run a few small errands, I would still need the others to secure my position once Mufasa is overthrown. If rumors and rebellions arise I will need –"
"A retinue to watch your back, eh? So what are you gonna' do to keep us interested, bring in meat for each and every one of us? I'll tell you now, you'll be out from dawn to dusk."
"Well of course not, hunting will be the lionesses' job."
"Ooh, I like that, I'm sure everyone will be thrilled! So what's the plan, I'm all ears."
"Now, now Shenzi, you wouldn't want me to spoil the surprise?" I grinned, my sapphire eyes flickering.
"You're right Ed, I guess it is getting late and boy am I tired," spoke Shenzi as she took notice of Ed's gapping yawn. "Hey Scar, are you staying here for the night or what?"
The place was more than a tad eerie, with decaying elephant bones and luminous gasses fuming from the earth; yet somehow I felt more at home than at Pride-rock in the presence of my own kin. And with the fatigue coming over me, I doubted that it would be wise to leave at such a late hour.
"No, I'm going to blunder through the night until I sink down a ditch."
"Well you're welcome to stay, we're pals eh?"
"…Sure," I replied wearily.
I soon made myself comfortable on the cold stone ledge and thought of nothing but the caves soothing warmth. Rain could be heard outside, bring with it memories of the waterfalls far beyond Pride-rock. It had been years since I had gone there, when Mufasa and I were still young cubs. I wondered what it would be like now, if it had changed as much as I had.
1 Who would suspect a loving uncle of any wrong doing? Who just happened to have missed the presentation ceremony. It wasn't really because of spite; I just couldn't see myself in the "circle of life" chorus line…even if I do have a lovely singing voice.
2 It could have been worse, what if I was King of the stinkbugs? Or Lord of the farting warthogs and hula dancing merkeets?
3 Me being a born leader, and they…well they're so obedient it would be a waste not to make myself an little army.
4 Except for Ed, god only knows what goes on in that little head of his.
5You know my motto, be prepared! As if anything ever got done with hakuna-matata. Only idiots have no worries, they are too ignorant to acknowledge the pot-holes in their life and how much more they could achieve. They are just happy looking for bugs under -- yeah…they're just happy. No, I have not come to a sad realization that ignorant people are better off than the rest of us if the meaning of life is to– oh now I sound like my brother.
6They actually saw me as an equal; the mere thought is too appalling to even consider! I suppose it is good that I managed to gain their trust, but I hope I never see the day when I stoop to their level of incompetence. And distrust on both sides balances things out.
7 Now there's a poker face.