Regrets and Returns
Chap 3
As soon as I snapped out of my frozen state, I yelled to my older brother, Bray, to take over the shop for a while, before throwing off my apron, and sprinting out of the bakery, after the one I loved more than anything else on this planet. I followed her as she made her way through the Town, and then past the Seam, and through a hole in the fence, leading to the woods. I followed her through, but because I was so much taller and broader than her small, slim figure, my arms and shoulders got scratched on the way through, but I didn't take any notice. Only one thought consumed me, and that was the thought of catching up to her, of holding her in my arms again, of kissing her again. I kept her in sight as she crashed, almost blindly through the forest, as if she were on autopilot. She was a lot faster than me, and I almost lost her a few times. And then, I did lose her.
I tripped over a tree root, and swore as I lost her from my sight. I got straight back up, but I couldn't keep up the same pace that I had been going at before. Losing her meant that I had to find her by my not-so-favourite method of searching. Tracking. A few times Katniss had taken me into the woods with her when Gale hadn't been able to go with her. She tried to teach me how to track game, but I had never been very good at it, and so I would normally be delegated the task of collecting edible and medicinal plants that Katniss taught me about. But I resolved myself to trying. For her. I would do anything for my Girl on Fire.
As I looked around me, a few things stood out to me. There were two big bushes with their branches laden with blackberries and strawberries, covered by nets; my guess is that Katniss and Gale did it to keep the birds away so they could get a bigger crop to sell at the Hob. As I kept looking around I saw a large twig, snapped in half and more branches hanging snapped off and hanging off a tree. I thought that might be my best bet. I started to walk in that direction, taking notice of all the snapped branches, and trodden grass. At one point, on one side of a small stream, I saw a Katniss-sized footprint in the mud. I kept following her trail, until I started to hear sobs, heart-wrenching sobs, that I had heard only twice before. Once when she found out her father was dead, and the other, on her father's funeral. I cleared the last of the trees and looked around, vaguely noticing an old shack, and small lake, before my eyes focused on her. Her back was towards me, and her shoulders were shaking with sobs.
I walked slowly towards her, and her head snapped up, her hunter's ears alerting her to the noise of my footsteps. When I was about 3 metres away from her, Katniss turned her body, and finally looked in my direction. I stopped walking, and looked at her. Really looked at her, just as she stared at me. Her hair, worn in its usual braid, was longer than it used to be, reaching her waist instead of the middle of her back, and she looked thinner. She had dark circles around her eyes and her cheekbones were more prominent. But her eyes were the most startling. Instead of the laughter and mischief that was normally held in her grey eyes, they only held sadness and emptiness. But she was still Katniss, and she needed me.
"Katniss." I whispered, and her tears started again.
"Why are you here?! Why did you follow me?! Can't you see I want to be left alone?" Katniss yelled. She looked so empty, and hurt. I wanted to pull her into my arms and hold her like I used to do whenever she was upset. It tore my heart out.
"Katniss. You're back. I knew you'd come back." I said, almost crying myself. I moved a step closer, and she scrambled to her feet, stepping back a step to keep the same distance between us.
"Peeta. Please. Leave me alone." She begged, and my heart broke.
"You're home." I stated. It was like a mantra to me. If I say it enough now, it might not turn out to a dream.
"No, I'm not. I'm leaving again." Katniss whispered, in a voice now devoid of all emotion.
"No! You can't leave! Not when you've been gone for 2 years! I lost you once; I can't lose you again, Kat." I exclaimed, tears now spilling from my eyes.
"You don't need me, Peeta. You've moved on, I'm not an idiot. What would Madge say if she knew you were with me right now?" Katniss said softly, tears never slowing.
"Madge? What are you talking about, Katniss? I could never be with anyone but you. I love you too much to even think about being with anyone else!" I was confused. Why would she think that I was with Madge?
"I saw you with her Peeta." She admitted softly, defeated. "She was with you when I was outside the bakery. I saw the hug, and you kiss her cheek." I know I shouldn't have, but I started laughing.
"What are you laughing for?!"Katniss growled, at me. I sobered immediately.
"That was nothing Katniss." I said. "She is one of my best friends, and she was there for me when you left." Cue flinch from both me and Katniss. "She was hurting almost as much. And we comforted each other. Nothing has ever happened between us. Besides, Madge has a boyfriend." I explained, and Katniss seemed to let out a breath she had been holding. I moved closer to her, and this time she didn't move away. I moved closer until I was close enough to touch her face.
"There is only one girl in this world that I could ever love, Katniss. You should know that. I've told you that many times." I whispered. Katniss looked into my eyes, and hers were a little less sad. She gave me a watery smile.
"But there's no way you can forgive me for leaving you. I know I hurt you, and there is no excuse for hurting the most important person in your life." She whispered and looked down at the leaf-strewn ground. I used my other hand to lift her chin so that she was looking at me again.
"I forgive you. I know that you had your reasons, and know you'll tell me when you're ready. I trust you." I told her, and her eyes widened. I don't think she believed that I had actually forgiven her.
"But–" I didn't let her finish. I crashed my lips into hers, and had the pleasure feeling her jump slightly before relaxing in to the kiss. It wasn't an overly passionate kiss, just me pouring all my love for her and how much I missed her into it. She reached up and locked her arms around my neck, and I didn't want her to let go.