Chapter 5

The following morning Rollins was awoken by the shrill of her phone. "Rollins" she said sleepily, "how you feeling this morning" came her sergeants voice "I feel like an arse calling you in and you passing out like that."

"Still feeling pretty fuzzy headed" Rollins replied, she needed time off to sort out what she was doing next.

"You take the rest of this week off, and see a bloody Doctor" he ordered down the phone, "Yes serge thank you serge" she replied meekly and pushed the end call button.

Getting out her Computer she looked on the vacancies listed on the SVU website. After reading the job description she knew she had the attributes needed but did she have the experience? She chewed on her bottom lip, she had to try she couldn't stay where she was…. Not now anyway.

Filling in the online application she hit send before she could change her mind, if this didn't pan out then she would have to think of something else, she knew that she couldn't face bumping into the chief at any time, she could barely cope with what happened let alone coming face to face with the cause of her nightmares on practically a weekly basis.

Looking at the clock she realised it was still early only 8 am but she needed a drink, just something to take the edge off how she was feeling, pouring herself a good shot of vodka she sat at the counter zipping her drink and praying that her personality would shine through in her application and help diminish her lack of experience.

Before she knew it she had practically finished the bottle of vodka and felt somewhat dizzy. Rising from the counter she stumbled a little before bracing herself on the work surface, carefully she made her way to the bathroom where she relinquished what she had drunk down the toilet.

Apart from purchasing necessaries she barely left her apartment, she had bought a few more bottles of alcohol, 'just to help me sleep' she thought to herself as she poured herself another tumbler full.

She spent the days laying on the sofa, not bothering to dress with the TV on in the back ground to take away the deafening silence of her own company and thoughts. Viv rung a few times but Rollins preferred to ignore the calls she didn't want to talk to anyone. She heard the post drop through the letterbox and land amongst the rest of the mail laying on the floor, she tutted to herself but thought she better go look see if there was anything important.

Pushing herself up into a standing position she felt sick, she hadn't bothered with her appearance and her hair hung limp and lifeless around her shoulders, she swayed towards the front door and using the wall for support slid down and reached out to collect her mail.

"Rubbish, Rubbish, Rubbish" she said throwing letters across the room until suddenly her hands stilled and she slowly got up and walked towards the sofa. She looked at the envelope with both a mixture of dread and excitement and her hands shake as she rips it open.

For a moment her eyes wouldn't focus and the words were blurred as she quickly scanned the page, then she thought she had read wrong and closed her eyes and prayed she hadn't. She looked again and there in black and white was an invitation to attend an interview with SVU in New York.

Her eyes filled with tears as she finally saw a chance, if only a small one, of getting away from here to a place where no one knew her, no one would ask what was wrong, a fresh start. She wiped away a tear that had fallen to her cheek as she replied accepting the offer of an interview and knowing right at that moment that she was going to hand in her notice, new job or no new job