A/N: Hello everyone! It's been a while and I apologize for the lag. I would like to say a huge Thank You to everyone who has stuck with this story and hasn't given up on me yet. We are approaching the end of this story and every review/comment/message on my tumblr has motivated me to keep writing. So here it is: THANK YOU!
This chapter is pretty short, but I felt that I couldn't withhold updates from you guys any longer while I anguish over wrapping everything up. I will be posting the rest later in a chapter update.
Cheers!
xBelle
It was the coldest night of the year,
Snow-covered street lamps and Belvedere,
The moon was just a sliver, the light was fading,
The war was on its way,and we were waiting,
You asked me how long I'd stay by your side,
So I answered with only just one reply,
Til the casket drops
Til The Casket Drops- ZZ Ward
Chapter 8: Til the Casket Drops- Part 1
Memories of choosing day and Dauntless initiation enter my mind as my feet left the metal platform of the bridge, narrowly escaping from several pairs of hands trying to pull me back. As soon as my feet left the ledge of the building, I felt weightless, breathless, and as gravity pulled me down in to the mysterious depths, I wasn't afraid of the unknown. I was dauntless, unafraid, willing to take risk: the first jumper. This time there is no net at the bottom to catch me, nor crowds cheering my name and commending my bravery; only churning water that will swallow me whole.
The impact of slicing through the surface of the water stings my legs and forces the oxygen from my lungs. My knees scrape painfully against stone and I can't tell which direction leads to the surface. My senses are overwhelmed: the icy water on my skin, the sound of the bubbling rapids filling my ears, my vision blind. I struggle against the current that pulls me under; a stronger, smoother, opponent than I anticipated. I fight back against it, kicking my legs against the stone barrier, in an attempt to reach the surface and relieve my burning lungs with oxygen. I glide several feet only to be flung like a rag doll. My back collides against a slim rock and my body contorts around it, the current pinning me to the stone. Maybe I will die here today— die knowing I fought until my last breath and slip peacefully into unconsciousness knowing I never betrayed my friends to the Erudite. All my struggles and pain will sink with me to the bottom of the chasm.
But I don't plan on dying. Not yet.
Every muscle is screaming for oxygen, fingers tingling, heart throbbing, ears ringing, but I refuse to panic. Digging my fingers and toes into the stone, I push myself up the rock inch by inch the pain amplifying in my back, keeping me alert. I free myself from the rock and glide through the water, urging myself to continue fighting on with assurances. One more meter and I'll feel the still air on my finger tips. Keep going, just a little bit more. Just a little… Cool air encircles my face and my lungs ache when I fill them once more. My head bobs under the surface again as the white water crashes against the rocks, forcing me to breathe in a mouthful of water. Dizziness settles in and I hardly feel something clamp around my upper arm, tugging me back to the surface. I feel the cold air on my face once again but my lungs refuse to open and allow oxygen in. I lay on my side, one arm draped across my body, the other in an awkward angle over my head. Thick dark water trickles down my nose and collects in a small puddle near my cheek— I'm bleeding. This is it. I've been plucked from the river like a fish and left to suffocate. A bullet in the head would be a faster, painless, way to go.
Something warm wraps around my waist and squeezes tightly followed by a harsh blow to my back, between my shoulder blades. My eyes shoot open as a significant amount of water surges from my lungs, passed my lips in between weak coughs. My lungs feel heavy but the pounding ache in my chest subsides. My vision darkens again as an overwhelming drowsiness spreads throughout my body.
"Breathe!" A voice urges anxiously —my guardian angel who fished me from the water. I feel something or someone slapping my cheeks but I can't force my eyes open to see who it was. I must be dreaming— I've died and now lie in some awkward in-between state waiting for my life to flash before my eyes. Then I feel something soft and warm cover my mouth gently and a juxtaposing pain in my lungs as they expand involuntarily with air, and I know I'm still alive. I still have a fighting chance. My lungs burn intensely as I inhale and I find myself choking on more water as I exhale. I gag as the last of the water trickles from my lips. The weight on my chest subsides and I finally feel free of the intruding water in my lungs.
"Stay with me, Tris. I promised I'd get you out of here." It's Peter —the voice belongs to Peter. Peter saved me?
I want to open my eyes or furrow my brow in confusion but I can't move. I'm paralyzed. I try fighting the exhaustion that seems to dull my senses with every passing second, but I'm losing the will to hold on. Everything else happens in flashes: the roaring sounds of the chasm, voices arguing, the ring of a gunshot, a painful pinch to my neck, and a constant mantra of Peter repeating, "Stay with me, Tris". Finally, I find peace in the darkness that envelops my body.
Tobias stands before me in an empty alley, brow furrowed as if he is contemplating a difficult problem, a hint of sadness dwelling in his eyes. The street light bathes half his face in light, and elongates his shadow. He isn't looking at me, instead focusing on the brick wall, his gaze skimming the top of my head.
"Tobias," I whisper in disbelief. "Tobias. You came for me?" I extend my hand towards him, but he was out of my reach. I take a step closer, followed by another, and another, my steps soundless on the concrete below my feet. In several steps, I close the distance between the two of us, yet Tobias stares straight ahead of me, as if I'm invisible. Why wasn't he looking at me?
"Tobias, look at me. I'm alive." No response. "Tobias?" I say again, lifting my hand to brush his neck, only his warmth and the soft texture of his skin is absent on my palm. I feel nothing, as if an invisible barrier kept me from touching him. Behind him, only one shadow is visible when there should be two. Then realization washes over me like a splash of cold water, chilling me to the bone. I'm dreaming—this isn't real. Tobias isn't really here and neither am I. We only exist together somewhere in the confides of my Divergent mind.